Dancing with a partner while dressed ?

[Barbara Dugan]

I have to admit that even I am Hispanic , I always been a clumsy dancer as a guy but when I am dressed I feel more in tune and relaxed to try dancing. One thing I would like to do is dancing with a partner , maybe a slow Tango or something similar.
Do you have the same desires or have you do it? I would love to hear from your experiences:hugs:

[Leesa2]

Sorry I don't have any experiences, but I do have the same desires. And it would have to be something a bit slower, lol.

[maya1love]

Hi Barbara...well, we both like gentlemen, so I suppose you are interested to hear about what it's like to dance with men?

As a gay man, I used to take Latin and Ballroom Dancing Lessons for six years through a gay/lesbian ballroom dancing group here in Toronto. I would always "follow" or dance the female part. I danced with alot of different male (and some female) leads. Alot of my dance friends knew that I dressed, and I attended a few of our dances dressed as a woman, and also enjoyed ballroom and latin dancing. I found it challenging to dance in heels but I made do...

I think what would be amazing is to go to a straight dance dressed and dance with men who did not know my true gender! I've fantasized about attending a milonga (a tango event) dressed. I'll let you know if that dream comes true!

[dilane]

Hi Barbara,

I've taken lots of lessons dressed. Some at a gay-oriented place, and many at a straight place here in LA. I've had no problems. Mysteriously, the dance teachers all knew my name and greeted me :) In a class of 20+ (presumably straight) people, I've been asked to help demonstrate things, with the class circled around me and the instructor -- the first time that happened, my heart raced, let me tell you!

In the group lessons (salsa and swing) I've taken, only a couple of guys avoided me as a partner as we rotated. (In group classes, it's typical to rotate partners every few minutes). I haven't taken lessons in over a year, and I'm thinking of starting again, it's a fun thing to do on a weeknight.

Since all my Salsa and Swing lessons have been dressed, I don't have to worry about transitioning to heels :)

I've danced with guys many times at straight places. Some knew, and some didn't. As I become a regular at a place, eventually everyone figures me out, and the number of dances decreases, though :)

[Barbara Dugan]

Hi Barbara...well, we both like gentlemen, so I suppose you are interested to hear about what it's like to dance with men?

As a gay man, I used to take Latin and Ballroom Dancing Lessons for six years through a gay/lesbian ballroom dancing group here in Toronto. I would always "follow" or dance the female part. I danced with alot of different male (and some female) leads. Alot of my dance friends knew that I dressed, and I attended a few of our dances dressed as a woman, and also enjoyed ballroom and latin dancing. I found it challenging to dance in heels but I made do...

I think what would be amazing is to go to a straight dance dressed and dance with men who did not know my true gender! I've fantasized about attending a milonga (a tango event) dressed. I'll let you know if that dream comes true!

It very cool Maya...when I was little my older sister tried to teach me to dance but always said to me that I never took the lead as a boy:heehee:


Hi Barbara,

I've taken lots of lessons dressed. Some at a gay-oriented place, and many at a straight place here in LA. I've had no problems. Mysteriously, the dance teachers all knew my name and greeted me :) In a class of 20+ (presumably straight) people, I've been asked to help demonstrate things, with the class circled around me and the instructor -- the first time that happened, my heart raced, let me tell you!

In the group lessons (salsa and swing) I've taken, only a couple of guys avoided me as a partner as we rotated. (In group classes, it's typical to rotate partners every few minutes). I haven't taken lessons in over a year, and I'm thinking of starting again, it's a fun thing to do on a weeknight.

Since all my Salsa and Swing lessons have been dressed, I don't have to worry about transitioning to heels :)

I've danced with guys many times at straight places. Some knew, and some didn't. As I become a regular at a place, eventually everyone figures me out, and the number of dances decreases, though :)


Hi Dilane thanks for sharing ..Its the feeling different when you dance in drab than when you do it en femme?

[Stephanie Miller]

So here's the plan...... You schedule yourself and your S.O. for Vegas next Halloween. My wife and I just got back from the Glamour Boutiques annual Halloween theme party, (this year was Pretty in Pink), and had the best time ever! Yes there was dancing. LOTS of dancing. There was music to eat our buffet dinner by. There was tons of raffle prizes and even Elvis stopped in to sing for a while for us. ( Yes! He even shoot my hand - Oh I feel the "vapors coming on" just thinking about it :daydreaming: )
I would like to take a moment to say thanks to all the other girls on this site that I visited with again and the new ones as well that I've been wanting to meet that made it. I'm on for next year! The theme is "Fairy Tales"

Picture shows only backs because I didn't get everyones permission to post :doh:

[AllieSF]

Wow, what a timely thread. I just went ballroom dancing with a male friend for the first time last Friday night. I have danced typical rock and roll type dances at clubs and a Lindy Hop night at a restaurant/bar in Sacramento, and love to dance the swing (homemade moves) at weddings. Dancing like that you really do not have much contact, if any, with your partner. But this time I needed to follow my male lead. That was a first for me and after all was said and done, he said that I did very well for a "first timer". Fortunately, he is a very good dancer and only danced with me with the most basic of steps for each type of dance from the rumba, tango and cha cha to the salsa, waltz and hustle.

The interesting part of the night was that this weekly dance is held in an old ornate veterans building which has been converted to a seniors center. This was also a costume dance night for Halloween. I didn't know that but had dressed somewhat appropriately with a black pleated just below the knee skirt, a pink fuzzy sweater, white knee high socks and black patent Mary Jane flats. I was told that it was going to be swing dancing, which I love, and I wanted to look the part. Knowing that Halloween was up next on the calendar, I also wore a little red glittered bow tie and blinking pumpkin earing's. Oh, and my male friend is blind. The highlight of the evening (early evening because the seniors needed to get to bed before 10 PM - LOL) was when they had a mix dance, which I thought was a mix of different dances in one long dance. Well, I was only partially correct. The other half of the "mix" was that the men and women formed two separate lines so that the women and men got to dance with different partners and everyone got a chance to dance with someone. I was lucky and got to dance with two octogenarians. I had to sit out the rest of the dance after I watched each of their faces change as they realized who they were dancing with! I had to sit down because I started to laugh so hard that I couldn't control myself.

Now about dancing with a male lead for us male leads in another life. I love to dance and when I lead, I just do what comes to mind and do not follow any formal dance steps. That is is because I am in control. However, following your partner is truly another art form of the feminine variety. It is something learned over years of dancing. My partner used his hand on my back utilizing the heel, palm and fingers to guide me along. He also taught me to lean back a bit to let his right hand lightly support and guide me. Another trick is light contact with him, knee to knee and foot to foot. There is a lot to learn, and most of it is knowing the steps (simple ones at first), how to interpret your lead's hand signals, and those other tricks of the trade. I truly enjoyed myself, senior center or not, and will gladly go back for more lessons and fun.

[Barbara Dugan]

So here's the plan...... You schedule yourself and your S.O. for Vegas next Halloween. My wife and I just got back from the Glamour Boutiques annual Halloween theme party, (this year was Pretty in Pink), and had the best time ever! Yes there was dancing. LOTS of dancing. There was music to eat our buffet dinner by. There was tons of raffle prizes and even Elvis stopped in to sing for a while for us. ( Yes! He even shoot my hand - Oh I feel the "vapors coming on" just thinking about it :daydreaming: )
I would like to take a moment to say thanks to all the other girls on this site that I visited with again and the new ones as well that I've been wanting to meet that made it. I'm on for next year! The theme is "Fairy Tales"

Picture shows only backs because I didn't get everyones permission to post :doh:

Thanks Stephanie, sounds you and your wife had lots of fun :)


Wow, what a timely thread. I just went ballroom dancing with a male friend for the first time last Friday night. I have danced typical rock and roll type dances at clubs and a Lindy Hop night at a restaurant/bar in Sacramento, and love to dance the swing (homemade moves) at weddings. Dancing like that you really do not have much contact, if any, with your partner. But this time I needed to follow my male lead. That was a first for me and after all was said and done, he said that I did very well for a "first timer". Fortunately, he is a very good dancer and only danced with me with the most basic of steps for each type of dance from the rumba, tango and cha cha to the salsa, waltz and hustle.

The interesting part of the night was that this weekly dance is held in an old ornate veterans building which has been converted to a seniors center. This was also a costume dance night for Halloween. I didn't know that but had dressed somewhat appropriately with a black pleated just below the knee skirt, a pink fuzzy sweater, white knee high socks and black patent Mary Jane flats. I was told that it was going to be swing dancing, which I love, and I wanted to look the part. Knowing that Halloween was up next on the calendar, I also wore a little red glittered bow tie and blinking pumpkin earing's. Oh, and my male friend is blind. The highlight of the evening (early evening because the seniors needed to get to bed before 10 PM - LOL) was when they had a mix dance, which I thought was a mix of different dances in one long dance. Well, I was only partially correct. The other half of the "mix" was that the men and women formed two separate lines so that the women and men got to dance with different partners and everyone got a chance to dance with someone. I was lucky and got to dance with two octogenarians. I had to sit out the rest of the dance after I watched each of their faces change as they realized who they were dancing with! I had to sit down because I started to laugh so hard that I couldn't control myself.

Now about dancing with a male lead for us male leads in another life. I love to dance and when I lead, I just do what comes to mind and do not follow any formal dance steps. That is is because I am in control. However, following your partner is truly another art form of the feminine variety. It is something learned over years of dancing. My partner used his hand on my back utilizing the heel, palm and fingers to guide me along. He also taught me to lean back a bit to let his right hand lightly support and guide me. Another trick is light contact with him, knee to knee and foot to foot. There is a lot to learn, and most of it is knowing the steps (simple ones at first), how to interpret your lead's hand signals, and those other tricks of the trade. I truly enjoyed myself, senior center or not, and will gladly go back for more lessons and fun.

Thanks Allie, I hope you keep having so much fun :)

[windycissy]

Closest I've come to my dream of dancing as a woman is square dancing, which I've gotten quite into with a LBGT square dancing club in Sacramento. I love dancing the women's part, even sprang for a petticoat! It's a thrill to spin and twirl and curtsey, my favorite part is the promenade home when the guy takes me in his arms and squires me around the floor, I live it!

[sterling12]

Take a look at your local Gay newspaper for your area. (In Tampa/St. Pete it's called "The Watermark") In The Activities Section, you ought to be able to find Dance Lessons being offered. It often happens at The Local LGBT Community Center, so you might also want to check there. Call up the Instructor and ask if you can present as Female and dance The Appropriate Part. It should not be a problem, as they are always short of people who want to do The "Follow" parts.

But, you do understand that Argentine Tango is A Lifestyle Commitment. You can't even begin to get all The Nuances, and Tricky Moves in anything like a short time. Be prepared to "Commit" to The Dancing Life! Same thing with a lot of other Dances too. Lindy-Hop or Jitterbug takes a lot of time to "get good." But Cha-Cha's pretty easy, (at least The Street Version,) and you can pick up The Fox Trot in a couple of lessons.

I think you might want to start with The Waltz! You can look elegant, the basics can be learned quickly, and it's great fun to feel your skirts moving about.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[dilane]

Hi Dilane thanks for sharing ..Its the feeling different when you dance in drab than when you do it en femme?

I took tango in boy mode, and could never get it. I'm not a good natural lead. One advanced female tango dancer asked me to dance the follow part once, and she said that I was quite good at it. That got me to thinking...

All the rest of my lessons were in femme mode, and I'm more natural doing the follow (female part). It requires a lot of concentration, actually. And of course, it's cool to do all the spins and cool moves. :)

So I've never danced the female part in boy mode except for that one time.

[Shapeshiffter]

I have never been much of a dancer. But now I find I want to learn. My Gf is trying to teach me. Thing is I just want to follow. When dressed I certainly move better.

[docrobbysherry]

I've always been a clumsy, spazzy male dancer. However, in heels, I'm forced to move more carefully and controlled. In other words, BETTER!
At my age, I don't have the flexibility or "passability" to dance with a male partner!

However, I have fantasies of doing female solo dancing on a homemade STAGE! Lol! Yeah, I'm NUTS! I KNOW!

[Christy_M]

I went to a bar last week and met quite a few lesbians who wanted to dance with me...I humbly obliged but I have to admit, I am a lousy dancer and when en femme, I am the same lousy dancer as I am in drab. I still had a great time dancing in 4 inch heels even if I felt ackward.

[sherri]

Friends of mine have taught me how to do the country two-step and I just love it. These guys are amazing dancers and 2-stepping is definitely all about shining that belt buckle, so that's fun. 2-stepping is sort of a cross between ballroom and jitterbugging, with lots of spins and variations, so it gets pretty aerobic. A couple of things I've learned while dancing as a gurl are:

All guys have their own individual style, rhythm, etc, so the girl has to adapt, which forces you to be more flexible and intuitive.
When you're following, you have to figure out how your partner leads. For example, one friend tends to lead with his left hand, cueing you to what's coming next. Another is more sensual and leads more with his body, so I focus on his mid-section to feel where he's going.
When your partner is not a very good dancer, it's up to the girl to make it go as smoothly as possible, which involves a tricky balance between following and guiding. In this situation I often find it helpful to put a little air space between us, which acts as sort of a buffer to smooth out the rough spots.
I can slow dance in 4" stilettos, but when the jitterbuggy stuff starts, I have to kick off the heels.
GGs are way smoother and gentler than guys. And when a GG wants to turn up the physical heat between you, prepare to be seduced, cuz they're really good at it.
Occasionally a GG wants me to lead, so I'm learning how to do that (I never 2-stepped as a guy), but I much prefer to follow. Leading just feels too butch.

[tamarav]

I have danced at many clubs with men both fast dancing and various slow dances. The hardest thing to do is learn to relax and follow, most good male dancers are good leaders and if you relax and allow them to take charge you can really look good.

I was asked "Do you Tango?" by a guy one night when some Tango music started and we ended up dancing virtually every dance after that, regardless of style. The Tango we danced was very reminiscent of the Tango Zooro did with Selma Hyack...

He was a dance instructor and a marveleous leader. When I was not in synch he would merely tell me what he was going to do and I followed his lead. Lots of fun, in fact we were the only two on the floor for many of the dances.

[girlygirl152]

I never had but Id love to have the chance to try dancing or learn to dance whil dressed in femme!

[AlexisWest]

I'd love to slow dance while enfemme

[PrettyFlowingGown]

great thread. i cant dance at all as a guy, but as a woman i dance great, and i've had terrific apraisals too. i love dancing in long full circle chiffon skirts, so that they twirl and shimmer when i dance.
i've danced with women when i've gone out, and they love dancing with me. i've danced with guys too....

[Magickman]

I have been out doing partner dancing dozens of times, while dressed up in 4" - 5" heels, mini skirt, and tights. This is quite amusing to me, as well as to the other dancers.

I only dance with women. Most of the women at the dance parties go along with the joke. Some will even ask me to dance.

It is great fun dancing in high heels, and I enjoy it thoroughly. I love the fast dances, and the slow dances, too.

At times, I have been to dances in drab, with much less success in finding dance partners. So, dancing while dressed works much better for me.

[sabrinaedwards]

I have danced while dressed and in heels at a lesbian bar. I enjoyed every second of it! One of my dancing partners was in jeans and a tee, and I was in a silk dress with all the accessories. She certainly looked like the masculine one of thetwo of us.

[t-girlxsophie]

I have two left feet when I dance as a guy,but when am dressed am like a disco diva can still remember the first time Sophie got up to dance,even remember the song (scandalous by Misteeq)I just seemed to just lose myself and it felt really good,as opposed to feeling like a complete twat LOL

The first time I went up to dance with my wife,well at least for a slow dance,it was at support group party(was to the song we had for our first dance at our wedding) My biggest problem was where did I put my arms but after sorting that out It felt wonderful up on the floor being together:daydreaming:,just like it was a new way to express our love

:hugs:Sophie

[Angie G]

I Never have had the experience. And mostlikely never will.But if the chance was ever there who knows.Well I do love dancing.:hugs:
Angie