Those Who Have Come Out To Loved Ones ...

[Emma Chase]

I am currently living back with the folks since my return to the UK ...

Up until this time I have had the option of dressing as Emma as openly or underdressing when DRAB when ever I wanted ... this has now obvoiusly changed.

I do like to wear tights (pantyhose) under jeans this time of the year (chilly around here ya know). I have about a dozen pairs of different types and styles in a drawer that can be found quiet openly .. not mixed in with any guy stuff.

I am wearing them under jeans etc now and will need to wash some pairs soon.

My question is ...

How did you go about telling your loved ones/partner etc about your dressing. I just want to raise the fact I wear tights.. and if the pair of pumps are found in the wardrobe ... I'll cross that bridge if/when it happens

So how did you approach it?

Was it like 'oh by the way' .. or something more subtle.

Just need a few hinters before I have a chat ... cuz the chat will be coming I just want to try and make it easy on all concerned.

Thanks

Emma

[kimdl93]

The first person I told was my sister. Then some years later, I got married. My first wife and I were playing around and she asked me to put on a bra, panties and nylons. It was obvious to her that I enjoyed it, so it became a regular part of our lives. We divorced for unrelated reasons. I told my present wife while we were dating...again I just came out and said it.

Each had the usual questions - was I gay, when did I start, did I want to be a girl, and so on...I was honest and open and it all worked out.

[thechic]

Hi there
I told my wife not long after we go married it was hard but she accepted it sort off.
my sister put 2 and 2 together and and just asked me if i was TG,I then told here
my kids worked it out over the years through many things so they know.
last Christmas i just told my mum, she was not surprised at all.
I must say its so much better not being in the closet.sometimes.

[AvidFan]

I could never tell my friends or family. Having the support of my GF is all I need. It lets me know I'm not alone, and it feels good to be 100% open with someone

[mklinden2010]

things come.

[Misti]

Emma, thanks for the thread. It applies to me 100% and I'll be following this one very closely. hugs, Misti

[Stephanie Miller]

What I have told others and seems to work well is to have a movie night and watch one of several movies that a "friend at work" loaned you. Just make sure one you watch last - so you have time to open dialog - is Just Like a Woman.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0104576/
I have found that this movie gives the viewers a better understanding of what a CD truely is. After the dialog you will have a clear idea of how the person will handle it and be better able to negotiate the steps ahead.
Better than going in blind.

[Emma Chase]

Well to follow up on the thread...

Like I mentioned at the beginning of this thread... I would be coming out about my tights wearing if nothing else to my folks now I’m back currently living with them.

I was out over the weekend shopping and left a pair of black opaque tights over the chair in the bedroom... in my absence I guess there was some issues with the heating so my mother went to check all the radiators in the house.. Well doing the course of that check she noticed the tights on the chair.

I had been home about 4 hours before she said she had been into the bedroom to check the radiator and saw a pair of tights on the chair did I wear them?
I replied yes I did wear them and have for some years now … she asked if I wanted a sex change... I said no, when did wearing an article of clothing mean I had to have a sex change? Why did I wear? To keep warm in the cooler months but also because I liked the way they feel . Did I wear socks with them ? No. . I don’t. Hmm well guess you would be better of wear opaque tights then.
I then mentioned I wanted to get some more as the pair she saw was getting the worse for wear... to which she said well go to M&S as they have some good deals on opaque tights right now. Today I have just returned from a shopping trip with mum. When we entered M&S she said the tights are over there and pointed me in the direction of the hosiery dept.
So she is aware I wear tights, she has also seen my French pedi cure on my toes (that my ‘ex gf’ so called did on me) when the timing is right I will raise other things .. but I do not want to overload her with this .. she is not a dumb woman and might already wonder .. she knows I shave my legs.. but again .. baby steps, for her and me for that matter.

I’ll keep you posted!

[Christie ann]

Emma,

goodluck, it sounds like your mother is taking everything in stride. Better than when I told my dad in the late '60's and he told me I had an illness. Don't push too hard, but don't hang back either. Those baby steps are important.

[Jenny Doolittle]

Sounds like a good start Emma. Remember, it is a whole lot harder explaining a lie later then the truth now.

Good luck sweetie.

[Jaydee]

Emma,
I often work in the woods. In the winter it is quite cold and a couple years ago, I started openly wearing opaque tights under my work pants. At that time I had not come out to my wife. She asked me about it and I just told her they were warm and less constricting than men's thermal underwear bottoms. It seemed like a logical explanation.

Jaydee

[Emma Chase]

Well some time has passed since I first posted this thread on the site.

Firstly I have come out to my brother, sat him down last weekend and just told him out right .. with a little delay in saying sit down I wanna have a chat with you to actually saying the words.. I'm a crossdresser. Hisresponse... if your happy, thats all the matters.


Prior to this chat I had spoke to my mum about tights and the fact I do like to wear them .. she asked why and I told I just did, I liked the feel and they were warm... first response from her .. do you want to a sex change? On telling her that why would wear an article of clothing want me to change my sex she let it go.

So brother told...

Mum kinda told, but not really ... how was I gonna approach this matter to her? Well I did'nt need to she approached me!
OK not the best way to do things but this is what happened (as you might of gathered from another post right now I am staying with my folks) I simply was in a rush to get out the house as I forgot about a squash game that was booked and rushed out the house BUT I forgot to put my heels away in there hiding place so ended leaving then out

Well who decided on her return home to do some washing and change the bath towels and came up to the bedroom to get the old towel and replace it with a new one .. yup Mum.
She saw the heels and on my return from the game asked the question ... I told her, sat with her to make sure she understood everything OK
I them called my brother to inform him that Mum was aware so he could begin to soften the blow or educate her a little more if required or talk to her a bit more if she approaced him on the situation...

I was out with Mum today and I was looking at skirts and shoes ... all cool so far, but I will not push the issue to much around her but its nice tohave this off my chest .

[Davina-Alba]

Hi Emma,

Mothers do tend to be very understanding of their sons. I know one fairly “religious” lady who is always making nasty comments about gays but when you ask if she is including her own youngest son in the criticism gets very defensive. “It’s not as simple as that, he can’t help himself, it’s genetic” and so on.

I never told my mother about my cross dressing and I thought she never knew about it. When she died I was cleaning out her house with the help of her sister who asked me if I wanted to keep any of my mother’s underwear. I sort of blustered “why would I want to do that” and she said “well you wore them often enough when you were young”.

It seems that my mother was well aware of my love of lingerie but according to my aunt she saw no harm in it. I was amazed and said so to my aunt who replied “but you are her son, you could do no wrong”.

Not really sure about that but as my aunt only had daughters what did she know?

So I think (hope) you might be in for a pleasant surprise but perhaps just go one step at a time. You know the old saying "softlee, softlee, catchee monkee"....

All the best.

[katrinakat]

I'm excited things have worked out so smoothly. Question: Have you started wearing tights around in front of your mother?

[Emma Chase]

Katrina

Yes I have ... once I told Mum about the tights wearing it was not long after that I started wear just under male shorts (longer type like the onces that are at the knee length) or cargo pant. I then went and purchased some shorter shorts ( http://www.newlook.com/shop/womens/trousers-and-shorts/cord-turn-up-short_203192623 ) and wore them with tights.

In fact one day last week I had on a green sweater with the shorts in the link and some kaki green coloured tights land Mum called me a frog ... ahh bless so I changed the tights to black ...lol.
I can wear in the house openly .. not gonna go as far as fully crossdressing tho ... she can understand the tights .. but not the skirts .. only worn a skirt once in front of her .. and that was OK too.

I bought another pair of tights the other day and she saw them when i put them on the kitchen counter .. now up till now I have worn 70 - 80 denier plain hose in either green, black or grey but these were a 20 denier with patterns on .. she said you bought those to wear?

Yup I did ..
OK .. well the sizing might be a bit small ... lol

So when she was out running a few erands she took them back later in the day and got a larger size for me.
For a woman in her 70's and of that generation I thinks she being super cool about this but she's awesome regardless cuz she's MY Mum :)

[Rogina B]

You are doing well and should be yourself before too long..I grew up with an understanding mother and sure realize how lucky I was..

[t-girlxsophie]

Sounds,from the little bits your telling us,that your Mother may be Understanding of you being a Crossdresser when and If you do tell her,I hope when you find the right time to tell all,that she understands.Just be ready for the Inevitable Questions that will follow,be honest and truthful and Im sure things will be ok,My mother to this day has never understood why her boy dresses up as a woman,and maybe It's becuse we never did have THAT talk

My First Wife didn't know and that wasn't right and didn't work out too good,so when I met my,now Wife online,everything was laid out before her and things have gone from strength to strength for us:) Honesty,and being able to put it out in the open really is for the best IMO.Good Luck Emma