Gender Identity

[Danni Bear]

Hello All,

I read an interesting article today that posits that gender identity is established by the age of two and does not change thereafter. If this is true, it could help explain why so many know that there is something wrong at an early age. I would post the site here if the puter I was on hadn't shut down on me unexpectivly before I finished the article. As soon as I can I will find it again and share it with all who might be interested.

Danni

[DAVIDA]

Hi Danni!
I am not sure about knowing that something was wrong, but I did know that having my mother's hose and bras on felt really nice!
I was five.

[Rianna Humble]

I'll be honest, I don't recall what I knew at age 2, my earliest memory is at age 7 when I knew that I was meant to be a girl but was born a boy. At that time I couldn't talk to anyone about it.

I would be interested to see the link of you find it again.

EDIT:

Don't know if any of these is the study you saw, but I found http://www.encyclopedia.com/topic/Gender_identity.aspx http://www.answers.com/topic/gender-identity and http://www.healthofchildren.com/G-H/Gender-Identity.html which seem to be very similar articles

[Teri Jean]

For me it was around 10 or so but like others there was no where that one could turn. Much happier now.

[Traci Elizabeth]

My earliest memories go to age 5 when I would put on girls clothes and knew they were right for me.

[Areyan]

i'd also be inclined to believe this. i am aware of my earliest gender-associative memory being at around age 3 or 4. i knew then that i was male and hoped for some time after this that things would come right and i would grow normally. my parents helped me to shove my dysphoria away with gender-conforming behaviour when it became apparent to us all that i wasn't like my sister and didn't appreciate girlie things the way she did. and i am only revisiting this in my life now, nearly 30 years later. very painfully and also with awe that i am still this guy inside after all these years.

i hope you find the link, would be an interesting one to read.

[Melody Moore]

I have to seriously doubt anyone who claims they should have been a member of the opposite sex to which they were born before the age of 5 or 6 (kindergarten/primary school age) because most of us haven't even learnt to distinguish the differences in genders & because the earliest of childhood memories start around the age 4 due to Childhood Amnesia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Childhood_amnesia).

Also the earliest memories are usually of painful experiences and not of gender issues. My earliest memories are of getting thumb tacks stuck in my foot
& of another injury I got from when my father threw me into a brick wall & spit my head open. This injury required me to go to hospital and get stitches.

I was born with pseudo-hermaphroditism that has obviously involved surgery to conceal my condition from me for all these years, but I have no memories whatsoever of surgery actually being performed on me due to Childhood Amnesia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Childhood_amnesia). Also I now understand that surgical procedures to assign the sex in intersexed children was carried out before the age of 4 to conceal the secret from the child. In the 1960s when I was born parents were told to raise the child as the assigned sex (Nurture over Nature) and never reveal the truth to the child. My mother was a nurse and has always had a very clinical approach to raising a family & devoid of any emotion, so the secrets about my pseudo-hermaphroditism has never been revealed to me by any member of my family.

I do have some very vague flashbacks of being in hospital & seeing doctors at a very young age, but I cannot recall the reason behind any of this. I can distinctly remember I was about 6 years age when I really started to understand the differences in gender and I first started to dress up in my sister's clothes and look in the mirror and see myself as a girl. But I cant say that I knew I was a girl because of the confusion that was going on in my head - it was always a question... "Am I really a boy? or am I really a girl?".

Around the age of 7 I started having nightmares where I seen myself naked at school and when all the other kids seen me, they were laughing at me because they all seen that I wasnt really a boy at all & that I was really a girl, I know what age I was by the school surroundings which i can still remember from when I first had this nightmare. This same nightmare continued right up until I left school at the age of 15, the only difference in the nightmare was the changing school surroundings which was consistent with the school I was in at the time.

The same question "Am I really a male? or am I really a female?" has kept on reoccurring in my thoughts right throughout my life. I finally came to the conclusion that I was more female than male in about 2007 at the age of 45 and that is when I can honestly say that I really felt that I should have been a female and not male. From this time onwards I started to learn more about transsexualism & intersexuality to better understand why I felt the way that I did and why there was so many anomalies with my physiological gender.

Yesterday I learnt something very amazing about some of the reasons why I might have been born intersexed - I have also found out that I am not alone and that there are many more out there like me. One of my best transsexual friends Kristy who is also intersexed has been talking ith me at lengths over the past week or so since finding out that her parents are also from the same area where my parents lived before I was born. Kristy was also born in the same city I was born. I am going to post a new thread (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?143339-Surge-in-Intersex-TG-amp-TS-Numbers-Something-in-the-food-amp-water-perhaps) to tell you more about this interesting discovery to discuss this topic separately soon & why the University of Queensland is taking such an keen interest in it now. So stay tuned.

Here is a link to the new topic I promised to post: Surge in Intersex/TG & TS Numbers - Something in the food & water perhaps? (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?143339-Surge-in-Intersex-TG-amp-TS-Numbers-Something-in-the-food-amp-water-perhaps)

[Danni Bear]

Hi All,

here is the link to the article that I was reading

http://webhome.idirect.com/~beech1/GENDERID.HTM

hope that you will find it as interesting as I did

Danni

[Faith_G]

I can't believe the author referenced John Money.

[Melody Moore]

I can't believe the author referenced John Money.

I know its bizarre isn't it? especially since I just mentioned 'Nuture over Nature' debate as well... also see the new thread I just posted (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?143339-Surge-in-Intersex-TG-amp-TS-Numbers-Something-in-the-food-amp-water-perhaps)

[katrinakat]

Interesting,,,,,makes perfect sense to me. I was about 3 or 4 when I started, and I definitely think its hard wired. There really was no choice for me.

[Marissa]

Okay..have to google John Money :) Earlier I was on the verge of responding but think I was wrapped in thought about the Nuture over Nature and Tabula Rosa (Rasa). But after reading the article, it seems to have foundation for those who grow up to 'feel' like they are in the wrong body, versus someone like me who does not have or have never felt that. So maybe I'm just a man who likes fem clothes and the persona..

I better go check my black board to see what is written on it. :)

Hugs,
Marissa

[Sarah Michelle]

I'm of the same mind as Melody, I don't have any memories before 12 or 13.
So I don't know what I knew...
But then, my (former) therapist says I'm blocking them, based on my dissociative experiences....

[Melody Moore]

Sarah, you will find that repression is a very common aspect to being transsexual or intersexed because of the
confusion & the feelings of shame & guilt we also have to deal with thanks to the bigotry that exists in society.

[Byanca]

I dressed in female clothes as long as I can remember. I remember some knee high shoes my mother had I really liked was suddenly gone. When I asked she said she had thrown them. There is a very early memory, my first one of trying on her clothes, but I was terrified of being found out. So that points to having been disciplined even earlier, this young kids are not scared for no reason. Or that my identity was that of a man. A bandit, unable to resist doing wrong. Dunno. Don't think it matters whatever it is. The result is the same-severe gender dysphoria. My repression is more in the form I remember only gender conflict episodes. Things like that depresses my family I think. Because all the things that matter to them, like birthdays, jobs, house etc is like they does not exist for me. There is no room for anything else then the gender struggle. This is what makes me the most sad.