Something I've Always Wondered

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Being as I've always loved to wear men's baggy sweaters in the winter, and often buy men's jeans b/c they are more comforable....does that make me a CD? If so I don't think it has the same impact for me that it does for MTF CD's. I get no sexual arousal from it and it's all for the purposes of comfort only.

Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

[AmandaM]

It only makes you a CDer if you either get sexual arousal from it or it helps you get in touch with your masculine side, or both. I prefer my wife dress up, but it's not required. I appreciate women all dolled up. I suspect most men are the same, CDer or not.

[sandra-leigh]

Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

I think there is a certain amount of "projection", especially for those who haven't realized they are CD or haven't fully admitted it to themselves.

But it is difficult for me to say. I've preferred to see skirts or dresses for pretty much as long as I can remember, so I have no grounds for comparison to say whether it is CD/TG linked or simply one of the varieties of male tastes.

My wife chooses skirts or dresses spontaneously some days, jeans other days. She seems to choose skirts or dresses a greater portion of the time the last couple of years; I don't know if her tastes changed a bit or if she is "inspired" by me or if it is a bit of internal "competition" to be more feminine than me.

I will add something that is probably not Politically Correct. I happen to like to see skirts or dresses; they attract my attention and my sense of aesthetic satisfaction (and possibly of sexual appreciation) in a way that jeans seldom do, and if I see them, I'm likely to Look (not stare.) I think it is healthier for our relationship if I'm Looking at my wife than if I were to continually be looking over at other women if my wife seldom dressed in ways that gave me that kind of good feeling. Am I saying that "my wife should be on show for me" ? No -- but if she seldom was, a sense of "distancing" could develop. The same kind of "distancing" can happen with regards to choice of sleeping attire, if it is such that it tends to act like a barrier to normal cuddling and caressing.

[Josey]

Ditto Amanda"s reply. i love it when my wife dresses to the nines but its not always appropriate unless it happens to be a special occasion. Comfort plays a key roll in both our dress habits whether it's CDing for me or not. I don't think of my wife"s wearing mens clothing in the same context.

[Joanne f]

Now that`s is a can of worms to be opened :heehee:
Some will say technically "yes you are " and in a sense you are but for the most part society does not see it at that , but ( always that but) :heehee: some who do dress in male clothes still get frowned upon just as much as we do and it is not always plain sailing for them as much as some on here might imagine, i guess it all boils down to how you are presenting you inner self that might make the difference .

( I want to make it clear that i am only talking about wearing a few items of clothing as the TG issue is something quite different as i think the FtM have it far harder than we do )

[Kate Simmons]

Nope, you are just someone who likes to be comfortable Hon. Any CD or man in general who prefers or insists their lady friend wear dresses, skirts and heels is really missing the point of being with and enjoying the company of a beautiful and interesting woman in my opinion.:)

[Karren H]

Sexual arousal?? What's that? lol I don't either so does that make me a woman......

I love skirts and dresses not so much heels... I have flats too.. Noting more comfy than a skirt... Women's jeans are just appalling to me!!

[Edwina]

Sexual arousal?? What's that? lol I don't either so does that make me a woman......

I love skirts and dresses not so much heels... I have flats too.. Noting more comfy than a skirt... Women's jeans are just appalling to me!!

That was my reaction too. I dress because I want to look the best I can be and believe me, I look far better as Edwina. It is probably more of an artistic yearning than anything else.

[Cindia]

[/QUOTE]Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?[/QUOTE]

My take on this is being a cd and not being able to wear skirts and dresses when ever I wanted, I just think its a waste when a woman who can wear them all the time doesn't. I do know that its not practical to wear a skirt everywhere and I'm sure if I were a female and could do so, I wouldn't be in a skirt 100%, (maybe 95%). I also like to see a woman in a skirt/dress to get dressing ideas for myself, so if I'm looking longer than I should, it's probably because aside from enjoying the view, I'm admiring your clothes/shoes.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

I just wear what I want to wear b/c it's a comfort thing for me. Of course I was taught that anything a woman wears pertaining to a man is wrong and vice versa. That's okay, I'll take my chances and be comfy in what I like to wear.

[Elizabeth Ann]

For me, the distinguishing characteristic of a cross dresser, in either direction, is that they wear the clothes specifically because they associate them with the other gender. That is, cross dressing occurs as much in your head as on your body. If a truck driver wears pantyhose for the support, or a woman wears men's jeans for the comfort, I would not consider that cross dressing. But if I have panties on under my clothes and nobody knows it but me, I am still cross dressing.

As for what I would like to see my SO or other women wearing, I agree with several here that I just like to see stylish women. Not sure it has anything to do with what I would like to wear myself.

Liz

[Danielle Scarlett]

I too have wondered about the lady cross dresser!! I mean,does she wait till her man goes out,then scratch off all her make-upbefore rifling through his wardrobe in her quest for.....TROUSERS?? It just doesnt seem likely,does it? I guess there is no stigma attributed to a woman wearing jeans,a t shirt,and even a baseball cap,but a man stepping out in a frock.....

[Gerrijerry]

Being as I've always loved to wear men's baggy sweaters in the winter, and often buy men's jeans b/c they are more comforable....does that make me a CD? If so I don't think it has the same impact for me that it does for MTF CD's. I get no sexual arousal from it and it's all for the purposes of comfort only.

Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

I simple do not see any problem with what you wear. If you think that being comfortable is important to you, and not what you are wearing, I would think everyone else should just accept that also. However people have there own ideas of what is proper and I expect they will tell you what they think as well.
As for my SO (wife) If she is happy with what she has on I have no problem with it. She accepts me what more could I ask for.

[Emily Ann Brown]

If wearing a man's sweater makes you a CD...then my Ex is a CD, and she would go out and kill herself because of it.

She liked men athletic shoes, boxers, T-shirts and short hair like a man.


Em

[JohnH]

I too have wondered about the lady cross dresser!! I mean,does she wait till her man goes out,then scratch off all her make-upbefore rifling through his wardrobe in her quest for.....TROUSERS?? It just doesnt seem likely,does it? I guess there is no stigma attributed to a woman wearing jeans,a t shirt,and even a baseball cap,but a man stepping out in a frock.....
Yes, and Jane Smith then goes by John Smith, since that is her masculine name.

Ah yes - the double standards that apply to men and women, as well as men who are too scared to go outside their narrow limits of acceptable attire.

Added section
Emily, that sounds an awful lot like my wife!

[BRANDYJ]

To me, it's only crossdressing when you are trying to look and or feel masculine. Beyond that it's just an acceptable choice of clothes to wear. Society thinks nothing about a woman in a man's sweater or jeans. Usually, when a man wears an article of feminine clothing it is for the purpose of looking, feeling feminine.

[AKAMichelle]

It might be a mild form of cd'ing, but who cares. I don't wear skirts or dresses and I don't expect my dates to.

[Loni]

could be. were is the line supposed to be?
i say ware what you want and feel right in.
as for how i like a woman to dress. sure i love it when she spends time to look great, makeup, clothing, =style. i love to escort a pretty woman to dinner and a show.
just sometimes i love being the woman...but no male escort.

.

[Michelle James]

It only makes you a CDer if you either get sexual arousal from it

Since I don't get sexual arousal from dressing as a woman does that mean I'm not a crossdresser. If so what forum should I be posting in? If I'm not a CD then what am I?

[Julogden]

Technically, you're crossdressing, you're wearing clothing made for males.

There hasn't been any sexual connection for me other than briefly during puberty and shortly after when pretty much everything was sexual. ;-)
Before and after that, dressing has been something that just feels right. I'm in jeans and a blouse more often than a dress or skirt, but I do find a casual dress or a skirt and a nice top to be very comfortable. I do tend to dress for comfort usually. I'll take flats over heels unless the heels are required for a special occasion.

Carol

[Pythos]

"To me, it's only crossdressing when you are trying to look and or feel masculine"

So if I get in my vampiress costume, and do not fully act feminine, then I am not crossdressing? LOL

This is such a fuzzy argument.

If a guy wears a skirt, hose and heels, but looks completely male up top, is he crossdressing? Forget about the whole arousal factor. Why does that even enter into it? I have heard of guys that get aroused putting on a tuxedo (blea).

Technically women are no longer crossdressing even when they are. Why, because it is socially acceptable. But there is a HUGE double standard in cultures.

You do know there is some fool in France trying to put across a LAW that bans women from wearing pants? He is working off an old law that still exists on the books but is largely forgotten. Think about that you Women that make fun of or limit what men wear. I would not feel the want to go full on fem if it were not for the sexist unwritten, (and sometimes written) rules out there concerning my choice range in acceptable styles, and women's. I like long hair and make up, and none of these are inherently female. What is inherently female is a lack of a bulge below the waist, and two bulges up top, and very well defined curves.

Most of the rest are social constructs that in my blue eyes need to be torn down and scrapped.

[mklinden2010]

Or, "Do be do be do."

[Stephanie Anne]

Being as I've always loved to wear men's baggy sweaters in the winter, and often buy men's jeans b/c they are more comforable....does that make me a CD? If so I don't think it has the same impact for me that it does for MTF CD's. I get no sexual arousal from it and it's all for the purposes of comfort only.

Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

OMG this most certainly makes you... enjoy being comfortable. Clothes do not always make the man and our messed up society sees nothing wrong with women dressing masculine so it does not carry the same connotations.

[Pythos]

To add on to my preferences.

I like the feel of corsets. I love how heels feel. I love the caress of a good fitting pair of pantyhose. If you don't, I am fine with that. Just please do not put me down, or limit me based on what YOU feel uncomfortable.

I think that is all I ask for.

I would like my female friends to wear skirts or leggings. Heck I would like them to wear the more fem version of my androg look. But I am not going to "expect" it, like how people "expect" me to be in slacks or jeans with no other viable choice.

[JohnH]

To me, it's only crossdressing when you are trying to look and or feel masculine. Beyond that it's just an acceptable choice of clothes to wear. Society thinks nothing about a woman in a man's sweater or jeans. Usually, when a man wears an article of feminine clothing it is for the purpose of looking, feeling feminine.

Last summer I wore denim skirts instead of shorts, along with a man's shirt and most of the time, a man's pair of shoes or sandals. I did it for the sake of comfort instead of looking or feeling feminine in the hot climate. Right now when it's cool I wear long pants almost exclusively. I'm glad to say I really didn't get many comments, but I got some emails from my pastor for parishioners seeing me wear denim skirts at the local Walmart. After several email exchanges he concluded that I did nothing wrong for wearing the denim skirts, and then I asked him not to bother me anymore about the matter.

Added section:

OMG this most certainly makes you... enjoy being comfortable. Clothes do not always make the man and our messed up society sees nothing wrong with women dressing masculine so it does not carry the same connotations.

Women are the brave ones always willing to expand what they wear.

Men are the ones who are the "shrinking violets" who are too scared to wear anything new.

[Proteus]

A lot of self-proclaimed gender expert yahoos are lashing out about the evil gender roles imposed by society, and a great deal of them even refuse to let their young daughters wearing skirts, lest they'll have a gender role imposed on them. (You don't nearly as often hear about letting boys wear skirts, then enthusiasm seems to fade).

But we love gender! Gender isn't evil or dirty. Talking down to the cisgendered does not make up for any past injustices towards the transgendered.

I've always preferred skirts, whether or not I'm the one wearing them. I know GGs who feel the same, I even saw a talkshow interview of a woman, to the shock and awe of everyone there, declaring that she does not own a single pair of trousers.

[Starling]

For me, the distinguishing characteristic of a cross dresser, in either direction, is that they wear the clothes specifically because they associate them with the other gender. That is, cross dressing occurs as much in your head as on your body. If a truck driver wears pantyhose for the support, or a woman wears men's jeans for the comfort, I would not consider that cross dressing. But if I have panties on under my clothes and nobody knows it but me, I am still cross dressing...

Kudos, Liz! That's the thing in a nutshell.

:) Lallie

[Janet Bern]

Just my opinion but if you feel a bit more masculine when wearing the mens things, or identify as bit less feminine
I would say you are a CD. Welcome.. what we wear is what we like
MTF like dresses.. FTM like mens sweaters and mens jeans
I guess...

[Chari]

You should always be comfortable and confident in whatever you wear, regardless of how you are presenting! Why is it fashion designers have "boyfriend" items for women, but no "girlfriend" items for guys? As for what GGs should wear - IMO, it should depend on the event, weather, & what the GG is comfortable wearing!

[Rianna Humble]

Being as I've always loved to wear men's baggy sweaters in the winter, and often buy men's jeans b/c they are more comforable....does that make me a CD?

Technically, you are cross-dressing and at one time would have been ostracised for it, but



For me, the distinguishing characteristic of a cross dresser, in either direction, is that they wear the clothes specifically because they associate them with the other gender. That is, cross dressing occurs as much in your head as on your body.

:iagree: Since you are wearing those clothes simply because you like the fit then I would not class you as a cross-dresser. However


I don't think it has the same impact for me that it does for MTF CD's. I get no sexual arousal from it and it's all for the purposes of comfort only.

I think that you are confusing cross-dressing and sexual arousal. Only some cross-dressers do it for sexual arousal, others do it because that is who they are and (like you) get no sexual arousal from the act of putting on clothes made for those who do not share their anatomical gender.


Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

I think that if you ask 5 CD's that question, you will get 6 different answers. There are some men who prefer to see a woman in skirts and heels most of the time and some of those will be cross-dressers.

Even when I was pretending to be a man, I didn't try to impose my ideas about dress on a woman. I preferred her to feel comfortable and - when appropriate - sexy in her own choice of clothing. Even wehre I work, some of the other women wear skirts more often than trousers and some wear trousers more often than skirts/dresses does that make one group more feminine/sexy than the other? Definitely not! Some prefer heels and some flats, does that make one better than the other? Definitely not!

I have become acquainted with an Italian girl who is manager of a restaurant near where I live. She is naturally stylish and elegant regardless of what she wears.

EDIT: I must apologise to both Elizabeth and Wsprs for wrongly attributing the third quote in this article. I have now corrected the attribution.

[Jessica Britton]

Being as I've always loved to wear men's baggy sweaters in the winter, and often buy men's jeans b/c they are more comforable....does that make me a CD? If so I don't think it has the same impact for me that it does for MTF CD's. I get no sexual arousal from it and it's all for the purposes of comfort only.

Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

Well, by a strictly technical definition, yes, you're CDing by wearing clothes specifically made for the "opposite sex". The funny thing is, most folks wouldn't see it that way, but they would if you were male and wearing baggy female sweaters. Kind of shows the double standard in our society. (And years ago, laws against CDing were used against women, when they started wearing pants, even if the pants were designed for women.)

I say wear what feels comfortable and right for you. I used to by all my tennis shoes in the women's dept. because they fit better!

[Lorileah]

I just wear what I want to wear b/c it's a comfort thing for me. Of course I was taught that anything a woman wears pertaining to a man is wrong and vice versa. That's okay, I'll take my chances and be comfy in what I like to wear.

well there you go. If you want a label then you can cling to "I am a crossdresser" but really you aren't You are just being comfortable. These labels seem to get all distorted with trying to get a concrete meaning.

I don't know where you are but the "pertaining" to a man is at best nebulous. Most types of male clothing are worn by females in Western society without repercussions. It is considered stylish. In my opinion the negative feelings of MtF crossdresser is more a misrepresented idea of sexuality. Women who wear men's jeans (i e you) don't do it to appear masculine usually. No one questions your sexual preferences because you wear "male" clothing. So the whole sexuality part odf dressing isn't usually part of FtM dressing except where transsexuals OR masculine lesbians are concerned.

Having said that it is my thought that MOST the CD's here are not sexually driven to dress either. But the stereotype persists on that for some reason. I would venture the majority of males here who dress in "women's" clothing (we will go with clothing that is marketed to women for this conversation) don't do it for stimulation. We do it because we like how it fits or looks. When people realize that we can forego the whole pervert preconception on this and maybe get on with importanat things in the world.

[Juliemckay]

Why are there "womans" clothes and clothes for everyone? It's only fabric... only one is silkier thean the other

[Lorileah]

Why are there "womans" clothes and clothes for everyone? It's only fabric... only one is silkier thean the other

Marketing? :)

[Juliemckay]

Marketing? :)

Then someone needs to start a new marketing campaign...

[t-girlxsophie]

My Wife could wear a bin bag and Ill still desire her,I love her Ass in Jeans,but equally I love when she gets dolled up to go out,My Crossdressing has no bearing on It

:hugs:Sophie

[AmandaM]

Since I don't get sexual arousal from dressing as a woman does that mean I'm not a crossdresser. If so what forum should I be posting in? If I'm not a CD then what am I?

Helps if you read the whole sentence.

[melissacd]

You should wear whatever makes you feel good. If you like men's sweaters then wear them, if you do not like wearing skirts and heels then don't. You should dress to please and suit yourself. What others think is irrelevant.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

agreed

[Juliemckay]

agreed

I have to disagree with you. Stay away from capris. The make your butt look bigger, your legs shorter, and make your feet look bigger. But, that is just my opinion

[sandra-leigh]

You should dress to please and suit yourself. What others think is irrelevant.

In a relationship, what the other person thinks is relevant -- but should not necessarily outweigh everything else.

[Amy Lynn3]

To add on to my preferences.

I like the feel of corsets. I love how heels feel. I love the caress of a good fitting pair of pantyhose. If you don't, I am fine with that. Just please do not put me down, or limit me based on what YOU feel uncomfortable.

I think that is all I ask for.

I would like my female friends to wear skirts or leggings. Heck I would like them to wear the more fem version of my androg look. But I am not going to "expect" it, like how people "expect" me to be in slacks or jeans with no other viable choice.

I agree with these statements. I like to wear female cloths. I wear them for the same reason the poster does male cloths. I like the fit, styles, colors, etc just like the poster. Between us, what differs is the poster can wear whatever she likes (for whatever reason) anyplace she likes and I must hide behind closed doors to wear what I like, or go to work in a skirt and my male boots and shirt. Don't think that would fly, but if the poster showed up at the office in my work pants...what would happen? Nothing.

Yes, I like to see women dressed in the traditional skirts and top, but I get just as turned on by them if they wear jeans. Women are hot, no matter what they wear in my mind.

[mklinden2010]

and zags...

[SamanthaS]

If you were my GG you could wear whatever you wanted :)

[Andrea's Lynne]

Wear what makes you comfortable and happy! And I'll do the same :heehee: I love my lady in sweats and I love her in skirt, hose, and heels .... especially since I know how much "work" getting dolled up can be :D

[Amy Lynn3]

I think you're overstating women's ability to wear whatever they want, particularly at work.

For example, female engineers I know HAVE to wear the same boots, jeans, shirts, and hard hat as the males at their jobs - even when they know they'll not be in the field for weeks at a time.

Let me tell you, their "attractiveness" quotient goes way down and it bums them out:

"After a while, it gets to you. Men are so visual, which is OK, but there's no way to present yourself to someone you're interested in that's any different from what everyone else is wearing."

Worse, when there is a holiday party or something, everyone "freaks out" when they see each other in something besides work clothes. Everybody looks different and it's difficult to settle back down to work for about two weeks:

"Damn Christmas and New Year's - shocks to the system!"

It was a surprising battle, thirty and forty years ago, when women started arguing they should be able to wear pants, anywhere, anytime. There were a lot of objections to that and much of it not very nice. But, nowadays no one thinks much about it. The "invention of the pant-suit" probably did enough to mollify most the objections.

"OK, that's not really menswear... Fine."

But, the battle is still on. When I encounter some GG who uses makeup to "fake" beards, wears "rough and ready" mens clothes, stuffs their pants to make "the bulge," who talk low "like a man," and cusses, I am still taken aback and HOPING that they are a competent person in their work and are able to relate pleasantly with others. If they're not able to do either, then we have a problem that has nothing to do with clothes or gender.

I hate it when that happens...

And, they're not all hot to me. I love grandma, but she's long past being "hot."

As she'd tell you herself:

"Hot? I've been hot and that was nice. But, nowadays I'd just be happy to have warm feet."

On the other hand, of course, are the women required to wear hose, heals, business suits, or whatever at work. That gets tiresome as well. It's expensive, it can be very uncomfortable, and you can get a lot of unwanted attention from, er, "admirers."

"Sometimes, clothes just mess everything up. It's not all Disneyland, everyday. Anybody who thinks hose and dresses should be the uniform for everybody just isn't paying attention to what goes on on oil rigs, how many groceries have to be lugged inside from the car each week, that kids climb like monkeys, or, that it's friggin' raining all the time in Seattle."

I don't think I overstated anything, my intent was to simplify my example of wearing cloths so all could understand the contrast between the two sexes. It's evident all did not understand my meaning and I will refrain from posting such unclear comments. Thank you for clearing up my meaning. You are a dear.

[Frédérique]

Being as I've always loved to wear men's baggy sweaters in the winter, and often buy men's jeans b/c they are more comforable....does that make me a CD? If so I don't think it has the same impact for me that it does for MTF CD's. I get no sexual arousal from it and it's all for the purposes of comfort only.
Also, is it typical for the CD to want a woman to dress in skirts and heels most of the time or are you okay with your GG dressing the way she is most comfortable if it is not in skirts/heels?

You’re a crossdresser if you wish to be one – I’m assuming you’re a GG? Perhaps you can get sexual arousal from not getting any sexual arousal, helped along by your newly acquired DRAB garments. It’s possible. I hope that makes sense to you. My point is that any sexual arousal you may seek (or expect) comes from slipping out of your gender, or a tactile feeling that the clothes exhibit, or a pre-determined state of mind that is attached to certain things you may desire to wear, if this is your goal. Sexual arousal is often part of a definition about crossdressing, being attached to this largely inexplicable activity so as to explain it better to uninformed types, i.e. outsiders. Many MtF crossdressers do not dress for sexual arousal, including me; in fact it has quite the opposite effect. Do you find this hard to understand?

I really don’t care how a GG chooses to dress, as long as she is comfortable. It’s rare to see a dress or a skirt being worn these days, but the sight is always welcome (to me). In fact, regardless of gender, an attempt to “make an effort,” and dress-up a little, is always appreciated. I’m not a big fan of heels, BTW…

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Frederique, I find it all hard to understand.

[sissystephanie]

I have said this many times before, but here it comes again! If you are a man and wear womens clothes you are a crossdresser. Likewise, if you are a woman and wear mens clothes you also are a crossdresser! Sexual arousal has nothing to do with whether or not you are a crossdresser. It is very plain and easy to understand!! What you do while wearing the clothes is a whole other story!

My late wife wore what she liked to wear........period. It always was her choice. She was such a lady that she looked good no matter what she had on. I try to dress the same way, but certainly cannot do it like she did. I do wear skirts a lot more then dresses. just because I like them!!

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Stephanie, I agree that we should wear what we feel most comfortable in. As you spoke of your wife, I always look very neat and feminine no matter what I wear. I have heard all my adult life that I dress like a school teacher. There is no way that I could NOT look feminine....I'm a woman and with my build and bone structure, I doubt I could ever pass as a man. I think it's much easier for some men (depending on their build) to look like a woman than a woman to look like a man. Again, JMO.

[Jonianne]

Wsprs, No, from what you are saying, you are not a crossdresser. Amanda is right, you are only a crossdresser if there is a cross-gender erotic componant and / or a cross-gender self identification componant to it. Some males that, of necessity, wear womens articles are not crossdressing. I know a navy seal that said they wore pantyhose when they were on patrol in the swamps and jungles in S. America. He said they used to get their wives to buy them before the military got their own version. To be a "crossdresser", it is in the mind.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

I already knew I wasn't....I just wanted to throw the question out there. :)

[Jonianne]

Ah, trying to trick us, eh?

[WsprsOnTheWind]

No, not at all. I'm always interested in the opinions of others.

[Dana]

Why don't you just admitt it?

Your not just intersted in different opions?

Your interseted in differet people?

To what depth and degree is a different question altogether.

But the truth be told is that men dressing up and having feminine ways interest you.

Not to say that you want to be intimate with them ~ but you and they could be dearest friends.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

I'm always interested in different lifestyles. I am always like a sponge trying to soak up new knowledge. I also wanted to see if the one encounter I had with a CD was typical for most.

[abigailf]

As others have said, if a woman wears men's clothes because they desire to look masculine or less feminine then they may have gender identity condition. Otherwise it is just wearing clothes.

I am a male and consider myself a girl. Even when in “guy mode” I may act, move and behave girlish. Whether I am dressed or not I am trying to present feminine or less masculine.

I don't however buy the sexual component. People do a lot of strange things for sexual arousal. Wearing clothes of the opposite sex for such a purpose is a stretch as a gender identity condition. To me that is just sex, kinky possibly, but still just sex. There are gender confused people out there who do combine the two regularly, and that is great if it makes them happy. But without the sex, they’d still be transgendered.

Note, I am a gender confused person. I sometimes can get sexually aroused when wearing feminine clothing. But these are mutually exclusive. I also can get sexually aroused when not in feminine clothes.

[Andrea's Lynne]

I don't mean to oversimplify this but, ..... what does the "label" have to do with who we are? I am 43-year old man who absolutely adores women and the beauty of their femininity. So much so that I try to emulate them. And, to be honest, have felt that way since WAY before puberty.

The label that goes on that state doesn't mean too much to me. I accept who I am and I love and cherish those near and dear to me, male and female.
I understand the OP point on this as a "clothes for comfort" perspective (at least I think I do), and I feel the same way. I love the feeling of comfy clothes. I also love the closeness with femininity I can feel by getting dolled up. I don't want to see people here get too wound up over labels placed on anyone.

I hope this makes sense, and would be happy to discuss more.

[Veronica 1]

I just wear what I want to wear b/c it's a comfort thing for me. Of course I was taught that anything a woman wears pertaining to a man is wrong and vice versa. That's okay, I'll take my chances and be comfy in what I like to wear.

I so totally agree. Yes, I wear womens jeans daily, not for any other reason than they fit me better than mens. Life would be so much simpler if everyone could just be glad that the person is wearing clothing and not so worried about who the clothing is designed for.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

I find that men's jeans are more comfy for me.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Sexual arousal?? What's that? ......


Karren ! we have been over this before ! thats when the er emmm gets ah you know. so th ah .. and when you ah em lik err have a well ah . Makes sense now ?

[Kelly DeWinter]

...... I also wanted to see if the one encounter I had with a CD was typical for most.

Well theres only one way to find out ! Now before all you gals beat her door down, just remember Whisper on the Wind's cerfew is 10.00 PM on the weekends and 9:00 during the week. And on ANY dates you must knock on the door, there will be NO honking of car horns from the driveway. And you better arive with a FULL tank of gas. (Only parents of teenage girls will understand this fully)

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Kelly, I just wish I had guys knocking my door down. I haven't had time to get back into the full swing of dating yet, but I'm ready too. I'm still working on my formal application for them all to fill out so I can run a thorough background check. The full body scanner should arrive at my home sometime this week....LOL. It's such a shame that everyone who has potential lives so far away or is already in a LTR.

I'm ready to get back in the game full swing. No more crying over spilled milk, mistakes made and time wasted. Today is a new day and it's time to move on. I must say goodbye to the past and the unhealthy and embrace the future.

[Elizabeth Ann]

. The full body scanner should arrive at my home sometime this week....LOL. .

Actually, I much prefer the pat down method.

Liz

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Too bad there is no such scanner that will detect a liar, cheater, lack of morals, values and integrity. Oh wait, I am a magnet for that type. I am the scanner for those. I want an effing raise b/c I have gone way over quota. LOL

[BRANDYJ]

All I want to say is that I really appreciate you Wsprs. When you first joined here it was to learn and educate yourself about a lifestyle and gender issues that you did not know anything about until you met a guy that happened to crossdress. now that relationship is over ( thank God), you remain here to continue your education and friendship with us guys that crossdress and to maybe help another GG to learn about her mate's crossdressing. Your experience with a guy that dressed was anything but good, but you are smart enough to know he does not represent the way all, or even most men that enjoy their feminine side are like. So I'm sure I speak for many good men here that crossdress when I say we are glad you are staying around.
Oh, I turned your magnet around to the other pole so it now attracts good men that happen to be crossdresser or not. The clown you had a relationship with is now the model of what your scanner will reject. Big hugs from a friend.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Brandy,

Thanks. You are so correct. I did date a waste of good air for sure. But you know what? The sun came up today just like every other day and it will tomorrow too. It's his loss not mine. I got an education out of the situation. A tainted one that I am having to sort out reality from his dilusional truths about CD's but I'm smart enough to get a clear picture.

"Thank You to the people who have walked into my life and made it great and a bigger. Thank You to those who have walked out of it and made it FANTASTIC....!!!"

[Mary Morgan]

Just think, you might not have met all of us otherwise.

[Amanda22]

I want my wife to dress in whatever way makes her happiest. It's about her desires, not mine, because she's wearing her clothes. I don't think it's crossdressing unless wearing clothes intended for the opposite gender connects you to a feeling of somehow becoming a part of that opposite gender.

[Amanda22]

Just think, you might not have met all of us otherwise.

I'm glad you said that, Mary, because the members of this forum are the most like family I've ever experienced outside my mother- and father-in-law. My wife has remarked more than once that we're the most loving and genuine group she's ever seen. I really feel love for everyone here. We show our vulnerabilities and help each other. It's really beautiful and an example of how I wish the world is.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Just think, you might not have met all of us otherwise.

Ahhh, and when the forrest burns it returns slowly in a much healthier state. You are so right, Mary. Through the fire some beauty remained. At least I have this opportunity to see that this guy so sadly misrepresented the CD population. I was so angry and bitter when I came here that I swore I would never date another one. I can't say that I would or I wouldn't. I would definately have to think long and hard about that before I knowingly walked back into that situation. I guess it would depend on how much the lifestyle was pushed on me. I'm never letting anyone push me again.

[mklinden2010]

Another... guy?

I wouldn't either. Not even the first time. Too scratchy.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Another... guy?

I wouldn't either. Not even the first time. Too scratchy.

Another CD.

[docrobbysherry]

I'm always interested in different lifestyles. I am always like a sponge trying to soak up new knowledge. I also wanted to see if the one encounter I had with a CD was typical for most.

If ALL the guys you've dated have been alike, then ALL the CDs u date will be also! Because, at the end of the day, we're all -------!?

[Amanda22]

If ALL the guys you've dated have been alike, then ALL the CDs u date will be also! Because, at the end of the day, we're all -------!?

I must be tired because I don't understand that!

[WsprsOnTheWind]

I can't thank you all enough. You have all been so supportive and caring. I've had outpourings of private messages of encouragement during this time. I guess I will never understand some things but a friend told me last night that until I learn the lesson God wants me to learn then no man will be the right man for me. She was so right. I have so much to fix within myself. I don't want to find the right man b/c I need to become the right woman. I sure feel like the clay that's been thrown on the potter's wheel and reshaped several times over the last few days. It's knowing that I will be fine no matter what tomorrow brings that keeps me going. Victor Frankel said in his book "Man's Search for Meaning" that no tribulation is in vain if we have learned from it. This whole ordeal has shown me that I have no right to expect anything from a man until I become a better woman. I see that I still have much work to do on me first. I just know that when tomorrow comes I will get through it. I survived a nasty divorce 11 years ago and I figure I can survive anything else from here on. Living alone has shown me that it is nothing to fear. One has to be successfully single before they can be part of a successful couple.

[Rianna Humble]

I'm sorry, I cannot agree that you have no right to expect anything from a man until you become a better woman. You are an individual and you are valuable in your own right. You deserve both love and respect for who you are - not for what you might become.

You may have identified some things that you would like to improve, but that does not mean that you should expect to be walked all over until those things change.

I truly hope that you find someone who will love who you are and who will respond to the level of commitment that you give him. Whether that is a cross-dresser or a cisgendered male is not as important as how he treats your feelings and your needs.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Rianna, I don't think I should be disrespected or walked on. I've just seen some things w/i myself that I need to work on.

[tricia_uktv]

Will you be who you want to be?

[deebra]

If all of you say its a comfort thing for a gg to wear mens clothing and not be classified a cd then why is a man wearing any form of womens clothing labeled a cd? I see a double standard here. If WsprsOnTheWInd can do this and have total acceptance, then male to female cders should be judged/accepted the same way. I'm 100% for acceptance with no criticism, but it ain't that way! And YES, I get more and more turned on with every piece of fem clothing I put on.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

How do you change society's thinking to get that acceptance Deebra?

[deebra]

I think gg could accept this more easily than men. Men have to be big, strong, tough and belittle every other male that isn't like them. Truth is they are the problem. Why not accept other people that are or choose to be different than they are, this is what intelligent people do. Women can be less of a problem because so many spouces of this forum don't/won't accept their mates and their desire to cd. Sadly don't count on the double standard changing.

[WsprsOnTheWind]

I agree, even if you don't understand it or approve of it, accept it. I don't like the smell of cigarette smoke but I don't hate smokers. Point being whatever the addiction (we all have them) just accept it.

I'd say some gg's that have been burned by CD's wouldn't be as inclined to deal with it again. They might accept yet not want to get caught up in it again. I can only speak for myself though. I'm kinda enjoying not having to deal with all the quirks and demands of it. Sorta nice not to have to play "mommy" to a whine box any more.

And no offense to any of you CD's as I do not judge you in any way...but it's really nice to be able to be the only woman around for a change.

[L0vleyme]

give me a pair of womens jeans (don't read mom jeans) and a cute sweatshirt any day, thats when I feel most comfortable. I hate baggy shapless mens clothes. so i'm the same as you, just opposite

[WsprsOnTheWind]

Lovely, whatever makes you feel best you wear it. And if anyone says anything about it you tell them to come and see me and I'll set them straight in a real hurry. I have dealt with enough jerks in my lifetime to be able to tell them to go to he** while making them feel welcome to be on their way. lol

[TianaCross]

well, heres another take on the subject - when im shaved and 'en femme' i like to sleep in my mens t-shirt and i am still Tiana ... i guess that when i do all that needs to be done with my body - i, just like any girl, like to be comfortable when i sleep ;)

but with the shaved legs and all - i dont feel any less of a girl.

Would that be CDing while CDing? lol

Technically, i guess any clothes that is of the oposite sex is crossdressing... but i think that the only important thing really is how u percieve yourself.

but then again, i dont feel much different even when im fully 'femmed up' - i dont get any sexual plesure from it etc - its just a more fitting clothes for that side of my personality.

but at night, when i sleep, i like to wear confy sweaters etc - even when im in total drab, if im shaved etc - or even if im not, im still able to let Tiana out. lol

Confusing subject, lol, and its late, gotta go sleep, lol - but tehnicalities are really not that important, in my view. And there are too many levels to any human being to be put in a box labeled 'crossdresser' that easily.

[Cari]

Do all CD's Like to see women in Skirts and heels - Not if they have better legs than mine :-)

I appreciate well dressed and fashionable women; for a relationship I like happy, confident women and whatever they wear to be that way is fine with me.

I had once heard that the strictest definition of crossdressing is wearing clothes that are organ specific for the opposite gender.
So men in a Bra or Women in a jockstrap are crossdressers.
Anything else is fashion which is impossible to define or a social or cultural norm.

I dont agree with that definition but dont like all the labels anyways;
For me its not always sexual and I am getting in touch with my feminine side.