First Therapist Visit

[renee k]

I know lots of you will yawn at this post. But that's okay. Today was a first for me on the road to transition. Which in itself is a scary thought. Having been "this way" for most of my life. I decided to take some steps to start down the path towards transition. Coming up on the sunset years of my career in aviation, and finding it harder to keep both sides of my life seperated. I'm finally coming to terms with being true to myself. It's something I should have done a long time ago, prior to marrying and having children. Back then I lacked the knowledge and the resources to be who I really am.

Today I had my first visit with a therapist who is versed in transgender issues. She has been part of University of Michigan transgender program. I researched her and other therapist in my area, and I feel comfortable with her quailifications. The initial session was as to be expected, a get to know you meeting. I came away quite comfortable with her. I outlined my concerns and goals. With regards to a time line and obstacles to over come.

The big obstacle for me is coming out to family and friends who have no idea about this side of me. As far the work place goes, being it's highly mocho. I'm going to wait to after retirement. I'm on the upset the fewest applecart theory. So that's one of things we're going to work on.

She did give me some home work as far as reading goes. Trueselves and Gender Blending.

I'll keep everyone updated and will ask for advice and opinions as therapy continues.

Renee

[Louise C]

:)Congratulations on getting to this stage in your life - i wish you all the best and i really hope it goes well when you speak to your family and friends.

Good Luck, Renee.

[StaceyJane]

I wish you the best of luck.

I've been taling to my therapist about transition and I have had a hard time with coming out to my family and to my job. I'm not able to retire for at least another 15 yrs.
My family knows I crossdress but I have never really brought up the fact that I want to be a woman.

[Jay Cee]

Do you have a long wait til retirement, Renee? And is it fair to yourself to put off your transition much longer?

[renee k]

Do you have a long wait til retirement, Renee? And is it fair to yourself to put off your transition much longer?

Hi Jay Cee, Good question. If you look at my profile page I'm 61 years old. Manditory retirement age for airline pilots in the states is 65. It was 60 until three years ago. So to speak I'm living on borrowed time. I've been in aviation since high school. And flying professionally since I was twenty. So I don't have long to wait, it's more a finacial issue for me at this time. My 401k tanked two years ago. Just got to catch up. LOL!

Renee

[Melody Moore]

Having been "this way" for most of my life. I decided to take some steps to start down the path towards transition. Coming up on the sunset years of my career in aviation, and finding it harder to keep both sides of my life seperated. I'm finally coming to terms with being true to myself. It's something I should have done a long time ago, prior to marrying and having children. Back then I lacked the knowledge and the resources to be who I really am.
Hi Renee, I will never be bored hearing about your story because it is so familiar to most of us here and as you know its becomes a real struggle to keep both sides of your life separated. Because deep in your heart you know you are living a lie. And when reach this point we know there is no other alternative to fixing the problem but to transition, because usually by now we have done all we can to try and convince ourselves we are the person defined by our physiological sex.

What else is there? Suicide? No thanks, I dont give up on life so easily - I tried that a couple of times then realised that I was being a coward & that it was taking the easy way out. So I eventually become stronger. Coming out to family & friends is always the biggest obstacle but for me it didnt matter anymore and I didnt care if I lost everyone in my life and it appears I have lost my immediate family anyway. But I know my happiness is more important. When I did tell my good friends, they all stuck my me more than my family did. And today my friends are my true family, not those with biological links to me who always seemed to make my life more complicated & painful.

So congratulations for taking the first step and I feel that you are making the right
decision and starting to head in the right direction, so good luck with it all. :hugs:

[Jorja]

Congratulations Renee on taking thoes first steps toward transition. Yes, it can be scary but know we all are here to help you through it. I look forward to hearing all about your journey.

[Kathryn Martin]

Such an important step to take. I am so happy for you to have taken it. It is like looking down the road for the first time and someone helping you to understand the roadmap.

[RachelDee]

I dont think anyone would find it boring. I find posts like these very helpful :) and im sure others in the same position would too. So thanku for sharing.

[Tora]

Renee, Good luck and peace. Keeps us posted. I also work with guys who have to flaunt the Macho routine. Weather then would understand, they could never admit it.

Tora

[tanyalynn51]

It's never boring to hear about life changing events. I know my first trip to my therapist was for me. It still is fresh after going almost every week for around 3 months for me.

[Tomara]

Hi Renee,

Congratulations and I wish all the best for your future.

Tomara

[Gerrijerry]

Just remember you can talk about other issues as well. Because in life there always are.

[Teri Jean]

Renee, I am so happy for you as this is a big step just walking into the office for the first time. Your journey towards finding yourself is yours so don't worry about time lines as to when to advance to the next level as it were. Keep us informed and if you just need someone to talk with just PM and we can chat. Hugs Teri

[renee k]

Hi all,

I went for my second visit last thursday, and one of my homework assignments was to read True Selves by Mildred L. Brown and Chloe Ann Rounsley. Which offers a therapist's insight to transsexualism. It's a very good read. I could really relate to all the stories of the individuals who they wrote about. It was like reading about my life. And it does talk about the issues of comng out to friends and relatives, and dealing with the workplace. Plus what your therapist's role should be in your transition. I recommend picking up a copy, if you haven't done so already.

We also discussed expanding my social circle, though support groups. Plus referals to medical professionals. I found her to be very well versed in transsexualism. And in the needs and expectations of one who has decided to take this journey. I felt at ease, with her right from the very first visit. She's very helpful,and encouraging, but doesn't sugar coat anything. From that perspective I feel I've made the right choice in seeking help with finding me.

Renee

[tanyalynn51]

Just remember you can talk about other issues as well. Because in life there always are.

Right on, Gerri, although it is funny that I seem to have found that most of those "other" issues are in the end, all tied in.

[ReneeT]

From one Renee to another, i am so happy for you. This is a heck of a journey, but isnt life a journey anyways! We can share stories if we are able to get together in Vegas!

[renee k]

I had my third appointment with my therapist on Monday. During our talk, she brought up starting hormone therapy. And gave me a couple names of doctors in my area to see. She would write a letter of introduction and recommend starting hormone therapy to the doctor I chose. I was totally surprised and elated by her recommendation. I going to make an appointment today with one of the doctors. The question I have for those of you that have gone down this road. Is, how did you present on your first visit to the endo. Female or male? All my insurance and ID's are still in my male name. I've been going to my therapist enfemme. And would really like to go enfemme to the endo. I just want to know what would be proper to do.

Thanks, Renee

[Melody Moore]

Well done, I hope it all goes well for you from here on out.


I've been going to my therapist enfemme. And would really like to go enfemme to the endo. I just want to know what would be proper to do.
If this is who you are then go as your true self. Why change now Renee?

I went to my first appointments female & I think it helps to put the doctor's minds at ease.

[StaceyJane]

I have my first appointment next week. When I made tha appointment I told them that while I was still under my male name I would be going as Stacey. The customer service rep for the clinic I'm going to said that wouldn't be a problem and she would send the doctors office an email telling them that.
That way I can check in as Stacey and that's what they will call me.

P.S. Check out my countdown ticker for my appointment in my signature :)