I'm wondering if my Mum already knows...

[RozalynLove]

Hi,

so, there's been a few times recently when my mum has bought and gave me tops designed for females. She's always said that she got me them because they were nice, and aren't obviously female. It's making me wonder if she knows that I like to wear female clothing, but just doesn't want to bring it up directly.

I mean I think there's quite a possibility of her knowing, she certainly used to know when I was younger and asked to wear her dresses and stuff, and she had no problem with it then. There's also been times when I've left panties, stockings, and stuff sitting in my room among my male clothes, so she could have noticed them. She knows I use mostly feminine products for taking a bath and the like, and has probably noticed my smooth legs on a few occasions.

Between all of this, and her purchasing androgynous female clothing for me, I'm starting to think that she has a pretty good idea. I'd appreciate input from anyone here! Thanks.

[Kelly DeWinter]

She knows, It sounds as if YOU want to talk to her, Why not have a cuo of coffe togeathewr and 'chat' ?

[JohnH]

I think it's obvious that your Mum already knows - a non-crossdressing man sure would not want to have those tops!

[Raychel]

It sound like to me that she may just know, Why don't you have a talk with her and find out for sure.

It is amazing just how supportive mothers can be.

[Karren H]

Mothers always know... Its what they do best... Were just usually to dumb to know that they know..

[AKAMichelle]

My vote is that she knows

[RozalynLove]

She knows, It sounds as if YOU want to talk to her, Why not have a cuo of coffe togeathewr and 'chat' ?

Well to be honest I don't see any good coming from telling her at all. I'm a crossdresser, not transgender, I don't identify as being female at all. I would hate to give up being treated like a man because I was seen as a woman. Although, my mum doesn't currently treat me like any less of a man than she treats anyone else because of anything that she knows, so I wouldn't mind if she had already found out, and simply let me be me. I just I feel like because I'm not transgender, but instead am a man who sometimes enjoys wearing female clothes, there is no reason for me to share it with anyone other than people I am planning on being romantically involved with. You know what I mean? Lol.


I think it's obvious that your Mum already knows - a non-crossdressing man sure would not want to have those tops!

I'm think that as well, but as a crossdressing man, I have no idea what a non-crossdressing one would feel like! I guess it's hard for me to understand someone refusing to wear or use something that they want to because most of the people in their culture think it is only for females. I've always been like that, I've never seen the sense in missing out on something I want to do just because other people want me to miss out on it.


It sound like to me that she may just know, Why don't you have a talk with her and find out for sure.

It is amazing just how supportive mothers can be.

I can understand someone wanting support if they are indeed transgender and need to eventually come out to people as such in order to be treated in the way that they want to, but this is not me. I am a crossdresser and do enjoy being treated as such, although by people who do not see in my day to day life. I wouldn't mind if she already knew, because of it not affecting our relationship, but I think telling her is pointless since it is a part of me that I would want her to ignore.


Mothers always know... Its what they do best... Were just usually to dumb to know that they know.

I really do not agree with you at all. If Mother's were best at knowing things they were not told, my Mum would know I have a lot bigger issues in life than this, that she would definetly want to talk to me about them if she did know. There is obviously some Mother's who are great at putting clues together, but it's a human trait. I do agree that there's probably a lot more Mothers than Fathers that are accepting of their children wearing clothing assosiated with the opposit gender, but that doesn't mean they all know.


My vote is that she knows

I would tend to agree with you!

[Stephanie Miller]

Well you've just had five answers, by five very well respected members - who have years and years of experience, to your question - and you've given five reasons that you don't agree. So why do you ask for input? You seem to have all the answers already.:brolleyes:

[RozalynLove]

I just realized that people are probably getting the idea that I'd like to tell her based on me having included the 'already' word in the title of the thread, but by this I meant that I'm wondering if me hiding it is pointless because already knows! :P

It's not that I want her to know so that she will change the way she acts with me, but it would be awesome if she already knew, because I love the way she treats me right now, and it would let me get dressed up without being so nervous.

Yanno what I mean?


Well you've just had five answers, by five very well respected members - who have years and years of experience, to your question - and you've given five reasons that you don't agree. So why do you ask for input? You seem to have all the answers already.:brolleyes:

I think you should read my replies again, because you seem to have misunderstood them. I completely agreed with everyone in the sense that she probably already knows, but explained that I do not need to tell her in order to be treated like the gender that I identify with. I'd like her to know if the way she treated me remained the same, but wouldn't want her to know if it would change the way she acted with me.

You are quite frankly lying about me having disagreed with all 5 replies, if you are not then I would appreciate you showing me how I did by posting my disagreements into a response. I really do not see how you have arrived at the conclusion that I seem to already have all the answers. I am asking and listening to the opinion of others as to whether or not they think my Mum already knows, because this is something that I am unsure about. However, as for people's assumption of why I am wondering, they were incorrect, and I obviously have the actual reason due to it being mine...

[Jilmac]

It seems to me that she already knows and is dropping subtle hints to that effect with the fem tops. If it were my mum, I would thank her for the clothes and ask her if she would like to see how they look on me. If her answer was yes, I would dress completely, Panties, bra, forms, pantyhose, skirt, makeup and wig, and one of the tops she bought, then I would sit down and have a mother daughter chat with her. What a great coming out party that would be.

[juligirl1984]

I wish my mother would buy me tops LOL! keep it to your self if that's what does it for you. Do you get excited keeping it a secret from her? I want to tell my mom sooo bad but I can't do it. It's like a life changing thing to say, and then she might look at me differently all the time afterwards. I don't know.... heck my mom prob already knows too. she used to find her bras in my room hidden lol. but that was when I lived with her.

[pattyv]

I agree with Stephanie. I'm not sure why you are asking the question since you have your own answers to the question. And please do not call me a liar.

[RozalynLove]

It seems to me that she already knows and is dropping subtle hints to that effect with the fem tops. If it were my mum, I would thank her for the clothes and ask her if she would like to see how they look on me. If her answer was yes, I would dress completely, Panties, bra, forms, pantyhose, skirt, makeup and wig, and one of the tops she bought, then I would sit down and have a mother daughter chat with her. What a great coming out party that would be.

I think that's what she's doing too. I did thank her for them, and I think she has seen me wearing them around, but I didn't ask if she'd like to when she gave me them! I understand that you'd want to do that, but I'm not transgender, and would feel so wrong dressing up in the style of clothing that I like to wear in front of my Mum!


shyselina

She knows. You should count yourself as lucky to have a Mom like that. Maybe she trying to help an understand. You should talk to her.

Oh, I do count myself lucky, for her buying me those tops, and a lot more things that she does for me! If she does know, which I'm pretty sure she does, she probably is trying to be helpful and to gain a better understanding for herself. The thing is though that if I bring it up and she doesn't already know, it could change the way she acts with me, and I'd really hate that. I'd like her to know and act the way she does just now, because it would let me be a lot more relaxed about dressing in my room, but it's not like I need to discuss it with her for any reason.


I wish my mother would buy me tops LOL! keep it to your self if that's what does it for you. Do you get excited keeping it a secret from her? I want to tell my mom sooo bad but I can't do it. It's like a life changing thing to say, and then she might look at me differently all the time afterwards. I don't know.... heck my mom prob already knows too. she used to find her bras in my room hidden lol. but that was when I lived with her.

Well keeping it a secret doesn't really add to the experience for me at all, aha, I'd like her to know that I enjoy doing it so that I'd have a bit more freedom to do it. Although, other than that, there's not really any reason for me to tell her. I'd be horrified if she asked to see the things I wear, lol!


I agree with Stephanie. I'm not sure why you are asking the question since you have your own answers to the question. And please do not call me a liar.

Please try very hard to understand this, because I've explained it a good few times now, and it's getting rather annoying. I am asking in order to get people's opinion as to whether or not they think my Mum knows. That is all, I am not asking for people to give me advice based on assumptions they are making. Consequently, I agreed with the people who gave an opinion which I agreed with, and corrected the incorrect assumptions while doing so. Could you please explain what you think is wrong with me doing this? I am failing to understand. Also, if you feel like Stephanie did not lie, then could you please paste each of the disagreements that I apparently had with each of the 5 people who replied before she made the comment? Thank you.

[juligirl1984]

yes, I'd be horrified to show her what I wear too. I think she knows but is just letting you have your privacy maybe? maybe throwing out "hey I will be supportive" or maybe it was a test to see if you'd take the garmets or not? very interesting topic lol. Its like a window of what may come for me.

[RozalynLove]

yes, I'd be horrified to show her what I wear too. I think she knows but is just letting you have your privacy maybe? maybe throwing out "hey I will be supportive" or maybe it was a test to see if you'd take the garmets or not? very interesting topic lol. Its like a window of what may come for me.

Yeah, I think you're probably spot on to be honest. She does consider me to be quite a private person, and it does seem like the kind of way that she'd show her support without embarrasing me too much! Are you pretty sure your Mum knows too, yah? She probably does if she found a few bras in your room, they're not very unisex! :P Then again, maybe she just assumed that you liked to keep souvenirs of the girls you'd been with, lol!

[RozalynLove]

It seems to me that she already knows and is dropping subtle hints to that effect with the fem tops. If it were my mum, I would thank her for the clothes and ask her if she would like to see how they look on me. If her answer was yes, I would dress completely, Panties, bra, forms, pantyhose, skirt, makeup and wig, and one of the tops she bought, then I would sit down and have a mother daughter chat with her. What a great coming out party that would be.

I think that's what she's doing too. I did thank her for them, and I think she has seen me wearing them around, but I didn't ask if she'd like to when she gave me them! I understand that you'd want to do that, but I'm not transgender, and would feel so wrong dressing up in the style of clothing that I like to wear in front of my Mum!


shyselina

She knows. You should count yourself as lucky to have a Mom like that. Maybe she trying to help an understand. You should talk to her.

Oh, I do count myself lucky, for her buying me those tops, and a lot more things that she does for me! If she does know, which I'm pretty sure she does, she probably is trying to be helpful and to gain a better understanding for herself. The thing is though that if I bring it up and she doesn't already know, it could change the way she acts with me, and I'd really hate that. I'd like her to know and act the way she does just now, because it would let me be a lot more relaxed about dressing in my room, but it's not like I need to discuss it with her for any reason.


I wish my mother would buy me tops LOL! keep it to your self if that's what does it for you. Do you get excited keeping it a secret from her? I want to tell my mom sooo bad but I can't do it. It's like a life changing thing to say, and then she might look at me differently all the time afterwards. I don't know.... heck my mom prob already knows too. she used to find her bras in my room hidden lol. but that was when I lived with her.

Well keeping it a secret doesn't really add to the experience for me at all, aha, I'd like her to know that I enjoy doing it so that I'd have a bit more freedom to do it. Although, other than that, there's not really any reason for me to tell her. I'd be horrified if she asked to see the things I wear, lol!


I agree with Stephanie. I'm not sure why you are asking the question since you have your own answers to the question. And please do not call me a liar.

Please try very hard to understand this, because I've explained it a good few times now, and it's getting rather annoying. I am asking in order to get people's opinion as to whether or not they think my Mum knows. That is all, I am not asking for people to give me advice based on assumptions they are making. Consequently, I agreed with the people who gave an opinion which I agreed with, and corrected the incorrect assumptions while doing so. Could you please explain what you think is wrong with me doing this? I am failing to understand. Also, if you feel like Stephanie did not lie, then could you please paste each of the disagreements that I apparently had with each of the 5 people who replied before she made the comment? Thank you.

[juligirl1984]

lol i wish it was the girls I was with... but they were hers... so I think she prob thought I was weird but never ever said anything.
I do think its in the back of her head. She might think I out grew it. or it was just a phase. I don't know, wish to tell her someday for some reason. I haven't had a GF for like 5 years. (was engaged last time). so she might think im gay? I have no idea but I do have to clear it up someday. even with the sister. she has actually seen me in girl clothes a couple times when we were younger. she just pokes fun at it sometimes.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Rozalyn,

Calm down dude/dudette ! This is a forum, you posted a question and people answered it. you asked for input and people are giving it. If you keep snippy comments going, this thread win degenerate into something meaningless and it will get shut down. If you don' want people to comment on your thread, then don't make a thread. If you were looking for a Yes/No question then you might want to consider posting it as a Yes/No question. Forums are about discussions and giving and recieving. Calling people liars and such is rather immature for this forum, and will not endear people to you.

So peace ?

Kelly

P.S. The correct repose is:

A. I understand and appologize to anyone i've offended.
B. I'll post clearly next time.
C. I'm new to forums and hope to continue to learn from you fine gals.
D. All of the above.

P.P.S. IDTYHACOUWIM

[Dannigirl]

I would say she probably doesn't know. If she REALLY knew then she would say, here are some tops I bought you to go along with all of those other pretty clothes that you wear when I am not around. My wife knows about my dressing now, I told her after a couple of years of being together and it didn't bother her a bit, but that is another post. She had absolutely no idea whatsoever that I dressed to the extent that I do, she knew I liked to dress up in costumes and stuff because I am an entertainer, but had no idea that I was a CD. I used to wear her lingerie to bed to surprise her, I would wear her panties to surprise her, drop not so subtle hints as to what I would want for my birthday or CHristmas, but she never bought me any of those things because she thought I was kidding. Last year she bought me a ton of stuff, because she now knows I'm not kidding. So I wouldn't assume she knows because she is buying you some tops that are kind of fem. Now if one day she buys you a garter belt and stockings, then you will know :o)

[RozalynLove]

lol i wish it was the girls I was with... but they were hers... so I think she prob thought I was weird but never ever said anything.
I do think its in the back of her head. She might think I out grew it. or it was just a phase. I don't know, wish to tell her someday for some reason. I haven't had a GF for like 5 years. (was engaged last time). so she might think im gay? I have no idea but I do have to clear it up someday. even with the sister. she has actually seen me in girl clothes a couple times when we were younger. she just pokes fun at it sometimes.

Oh no! I feel your pain if they belonged to her! I'm sure she doesn't think of her child as weird though! I think it probably will be in the back of her head, obviously she won't think about it everyday, maybe occasionaly. Like, "Hmm, I really do wonder what he was doing with my bras!" Does your Sister tease you for doing it in the past, or does it seem like she thinks you still do? I guess it's possible that your Mum asked your Sister what she thought you'd be doing with her bras, and your Sister told her that you were probably wearing them. I dunno if she thinks you're gay, lol, maybe just that your girlfriend put you right off women?

My Mum knows I paint my nails too, lol! So I think that the next day I have college, I'll paint them, put on the nice polo neck jumper that she gave me, and ask what she thinks of it. I might even get another few tops out of it! :D


Rozalyn,

Calm down dude/dudette ! This is a forum, you posted a question and people answered it. you asked for input and people are giving it. If you keep snippy comments going, this thread win degenerate into something meaningless and it will get shut down. If you don' want people to comment on your thread, then don't make a thread. If you were looking for a Yes/No question then you might want to consider posting it as a Yes/No question. Forums are about discussions and giving and recieving. Call people liars and such is rather immature.

So peace ?

Kelly

P.S. The correct repose is:

A. I understand and appologize to anyone i've offended.
B. I'll post clearly next time.
C. I'm new to forums and hope to continue to learn from you fine gals.
D. All of the above.

P.P.S. IDTYHACOUWIM

I really have nothing to say to someone who gives 'correct responses' to their posts, it's a total waste of my time. There's actually no reason for it, other than to start an argument.


I would say she probably doesn't know. If she REALLY knew then she would say, here are some tops I bought you to go along with all of those other pretty clothes that you wear when I am not around. My wife knows about my dressing now, I told her after a couple of years of being together and it didn't bother her a bit, but that is another post. She had absolutely no idea whatsoever that I dressed to the extent that I do, she knew I liked to dress up in costumes and stuff because I am an entertainer, but had no idea that I was a CD. I used to wear her lingerie to bed to surprise her, I would wear her panties to surprise her, drop not so subtle hints as to what I would want for my birthday or CHristmas, but she never bought me any of those things because she thought I was kidding. Last year she bought me a ton of stuff, because she now knows I'm not kidding. So I wouldn't assume she knows because she is buying you some tops that are kind of fem. Now if one day she buys you a garter belt and stockings, then you will know :o)

I see where you're coming from, she could have made it more obvious if she was giving me them for the reason of letting me know that she knew. I'm not sure she would try to make it that obvious though, she knows I'd die on the spot if she said something like that to me! It's so awesome that your wife buys you things now, you're so lucky! I know what you mean about the garter belt and stockings being a lot more obvious, but the tops are actual female tops, with the sizing in female sizes and everything, lol! It's not just that making me think it though, there's probably is quite a lot of things about me that would make her think I liked acting feminine! I have no idea, and you could be right, but something tells me that she must know!

[juligirl1984]

yes she made fun of me at work one day in front of her boyfriend. (She would antaginize me about if for weeks before hand)she kept hinting she was going to tell and poke fun. she would be like "aww you like my tutu" and call me balarina and stuff. she would dance circles around me spinning and stuff. then she told him when we ate lunch and I about lost it. I just played it cool and was like "yea I did that but I was young and bored" lol. He honestly didn't even seem to give a shit. but talk about being embarrassed. I'm their boss at work.... lol. now I do not know if she did it to be mean or to get back at me for making fun of her over the past month while we worked... anyways it was way awkward for me and I didn't appreciate it but what can you do? i was caught in the act... at least she didn't tell him when I had a bathing suit on and would sleep in it. (I was young at all the times I was caught by family) last time my mom took he bra back lol was when i was 19 or 20. I then moved away to start my own life and have privacy.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Oh no! I feel your pain if they belonged to her! I'm sure she doesn't think of her child as weird though! I think it probably will be in the back of her head, obviously she won't think about it everyday, maybe occasionaly. Like, "Hmm, I really do wonder what he was doing with my bras!" Does your Sister tease you for doing it in the past, or does it seem like she thinks you still do? I guess it's possible that your Mum asked your Sister what she thought you'd be doing with her bras, and your Sister told her that you were probably wearing them. I dunno if she thinks you're gay, lol, maybe just that your girlfriend put you right off women?

My Mum knows I paint my nails too, lol! So I think that the next day I have college, I'll paint them, put on the nice polo neck jumper that she gave me, and ask what she thinks of it. I might even get another few tops out of it! :D



I really have nothing to say to someone who gives 'correct responses' to their posts, it's a total waste of my time. There's actually no reason for it, other than to start an argument.



I see where you're coming from, she could have made it more obvious if she was giving me them for the reason of letting me know that she knew. I'm not sure she would try to make it that obvious though, she knows I'd die on the spot if she said something like that to me! It's so awesome that your wife buys you things now, you're so lucky! I know what you mean about the garter belt and stockings being a lot more obvious, but the tops are actual female tops, with the sizing in female sizes and everything, lol! It's not just that making me think it though, there's probably is quite a lot of things about me that would make her think I liked acting feminine! I have no idea, and you could be right, but something tells me that she must know!



Since you are posting more civil replys, I think you understood what I was saying. Thanks :)

[pattyv]

You say you are a crossdresser, but not a transgendered person. The fact that you enjoy crossdressing automatically makes you transgendered. It does not make you a transsexual. I'm trying to help you here. Please give me your thoughts.

[juligirl1984]

yes I think my ex fiance kinda shook me away from woman for a while. she caught me too once. god I'm just not good at hiding it I guess LOL! or just bad luck. anyways she laughed her ass off and was like omg wtf! I think she got mad that I looked better than she did in her clothes. But it was messed up. she told a lot of people about it after we broke up and we both worked at the same place so all my work friends knew about it. I was like wow thats all she could say? and denied it... wow this thread is bringing up some fond memories to make me laugh and know now its not that bad.

[Stephanie Miller]

Rozalyn you need to take a deep breath. (Or, as Presh suggested in your visitor messages back in June – “Now I get your posts. You are just a child only 20 years of age, gonna come in this forum guns blazeing. May i suggest you chill out,”!) Calling people liars is sure way of alienating yourself from a lot open discussions on this board. If you want to get technical, yes I was wrong. There were only 4 you did not agree with.
1) Kelly : Why not have a cup of coffee together and 'chat' ?
Rozalyn: Well to be honest I don't see any good coming from telling her at all.
2) JohnH: a non-crossdressing man sure would not want to have those tops!
Rozalyn: I've always been like that, I've never seen the sense in missing out on something
3) Raychel: Why don't you have a talk with her and find out for sure.
Rozalyn: I think telling her is pointless
4) Karren: DON’T WEAR JEANS! Opps. Sorry. Wrong thread Mothers always know.
Rozalyn: I really do not agree with you at all.

It’s not until your fourth post you finally got around to asking the question you should have started with.
“I am asking in order to get people's opinion as to whether or not they think my Mum knows. That is all, I am not asking for people to give me advice based on assumptions they are making.”
So as not to ruffle any more of your feathers here is my answer.
Mum knows.

[Loni]

mom's are great people, mine is even sewing me a dress.
we went to the store and picked out a pattern and cloth to make it with.
we go shopping all the time. she loves to have a son and a daughter.

[Danni Bear]

Hi,

so, there's been a few times recently when my mum has bought and gave me tops designed for females. She's always said that she got me them because they were nice, and aren't obviously female. It's making me wonder if she knows that I like to wear female clothing, but just doesn't want to bring it up directly.

I mean I think there's quite a possibility of her knowing, she certainly used to know when I was younger and asked to wear her dresses and stuff, and she had no problem with it then. There's also been times when I've left panties, stockings, and stuff sitting in my room among my male clothes, so she could have noticed them. She knows I use mostly feminine products for taking a bath and the like, and has probably noticed my smooth legs on a few occasions.

Between all of this, and her purchasing androgynous female clothing for me, I'm starting to think that she has a pretty good idea. I'd appreciate input from anyone here! Thanks.

Rozalyn,

I am a mom who is also a transitioned M2F TS. yes she does know. Like a lot of moms If one of my kids did anything like you have done. I would expect them to tell me directly. Buying you the tops is her way of trying to get you to open up to her without putting you in a position of embarassment. There are many more on here that crossdress and remain male without any thoughts or desires to be female than there are those that do.

Danni

[RozalynLove]

yes she made fun of me at work one day in front of her boyfriend. (She would antaginize me about if for weeks before hand)she kept hinting she was going to tell and poke fun. she would be like "aww you like my tutu" and call me balarina and stuff. she would dance circles around me spinning and stuff. then she told him when we ate lunch and I about lost it. I just played it cool and was like "yea I did that but I was young and bored" lol. He honestly didn't even seem to give a shit. but talk about being embarrassed. I'm their boss at work.... lol. now I do not know if she did it to be mean or to get back at me for making fun of her over the past month while we worked... anyways it was way awkward for me and I didn't appreciate it but what can you do? i was caught in the act... at least she didn't tell him when I had a bathing suit on and would sleep in it. (I was young at all the times I was caught by family) last time my mom took he bra back lol was when i was 19 or 20. I then moved away to start my own life and have privacy.

Oh my God, that seems really quite mean of her! It could have been her getting revenge though, lol! It's great that you have your own place to dress in privacy now.


Since you are posting more civil replys, I think you understood what I was saying. Thanks :)

You're an actual looney, please leave me alone.


You say you are a crossdresser, but not a transgendered person. The fact that you enjoy crossdressing automatically makes you transgendered. It does not make you a transsexual. I'm trying to help you here. Please give me your thoughts.

I'm sorry, I think the word 'transsexual' is a lot better for what I am trying to say using the word 'transgender'. What I mean is that there are situations in which I enjoy dressing, acting, and being treated as a male, and other situations where I enjoy dressing, acting, and being treated as a female. I would understand the need to tell my Mum if there were situations in which I wanted her to treat me as a female, but there aren't any situations like that, with the possible exeption of when buying me clothes!

So, I wouldn't mind if she already knew that I like to dress in female clothes because if she does then it hasn't changed the way she acts towards me. I just don't see telling her as a good idea, because she may not know, in which case finding out could easily change the way she acts towards me.

I would like her to know because of the added freedom it would give me, but would only want that freedom if it did not interfer with the way she treated me as a man, and I think her understanding the details of me liking to dress in female clothes definetly would.

For the reason of her buying me female clothes sometimes instead of male clothes, and for the added freedom to dress in them that I would have, I'd like her to know.

Although between the possibility of it changing how she acted with me in other situations, and the added freedom not actually being that great due to my Dad being very, very 'traditional', I just don't see telling her as being able to do very much good, but being able to do a lot of harm. Yanno what I mean?

I did appreciate the other people who were trying to help by telling me to talk to her about it, and I responded to them all in a polite manner, explaining why telling her was not the most sensible thing for me to do. It's just that I didn't feel the need to be polite to those who were being down right ingorant to my explanation.


yes I think my ex fiance kinda shook me away from woman for a while. she caught me too once. god I'm just not good at hiding it I guess LOL! or just bad luck. anyways she laughed her ass off and was like omg wtf! I think she got mad that I looked better than she did in her clothes. But it was messed up. she told a lot of people about it after we broke up and we both worked at the same place so all my work friends knew about it. I was like wow thats all she could say? and denied it... wow this thread is bringing up some fond memories to make me laugh and know now its not that bad.

Yeah I know how some women can put you off them all, but you can't let them! They're not all meanies, lol! It does suck that she told people, I think that people should keep what happens in a relationship between those involved, but I'm glad that you don't see it as too bad now that you're looking back on it.

[RozalynLove]

Rozalyn,

I am a mom who is also a transitioned M2F TS. yes she does know. Like a lot of moms If one of my kids did anything like you have done. I would expect them to tell me directly. Buying you the tops is her way of trying to get you to open up to her without putting you in a position of embarassment. There are many more on here that crossdress and remain male without any thoughts or desires to be female than there are those that do.

Danni

I do agree with you that buying me them was her way of getting me to open up about it, and I really wouldn't have a problem with her knowing as long as after it she acted as she does now. Although, I really do not want to open up in the sense of giving her every detail about it, because not only do I feel that it is potentially damaging to our relationship, but it is down right unacceptable for a Mum/Son discussion. I do not want her to feel like I want to hide it from her, but there is definetly aspects of the how and why that I'd like to remain private from her, do you know what I mean? Do you think that me accepting the tops in any way made her feel more included?

[juligirl1984]

its just hard to try to date again with this other person in my life (aka Julianna). thanks for the replies. I hope you get your deal with you mum solved out somehow. or just ignore it and leave it alone! Thats what I'm the best at doing LOL! (not saying its best for you though). I hope when I tell my mom that she will be like, "I already knew the whole time". but It will go deeper than that for me I think...

[juligirl1984]

quick Question? sorry not to steal the thread, but do any of you tell the girl your interested in that you CD first? or after you date a while? This might help me a lot!

[Kelly DeWinter]

[QUOTE=RozalynLove;2333670]......
You're an actual looney, please leave me alone.
QUOTE]


ROFL ..... I didn't think the civility would last long.

[RozalynLove]

its just hard to try to date again with this other person in my life (aka Julianna). thanks for the replies. I hope you get your deal with you mum solved out somehow. or just ignore it and leave it alone! Thats what I'm the best at doing LOL! (not saying its best for you though). I hope when I tell my mom that she will be like, "I already knew the whole time". but It will go deeper than that for me I think...

quick Question? sorry not to steal the thread, but do any of you tell the girl your interested in that you CD first? or after you date a while? This might help me a lot!

I have no idea how it will turn out with my mum, lol, but I don't want her to feel like I want to exclude her from my life, so I hope I find some way of reaching a middle point. I'm not meaning to assume or anything, but do you notice how when you talk about telling your Mum, you said 'when', and not 'if'? I think you want to! I totally understand what's stopping you, and I don't know your mum at all, but her non-reacting to finding her bras in your room might be a sign that she'll take it in her stride!

You're not stealing the thread lol! I think it's really hard trying to find a time to tell them as well, because I don't want to get ages into the relationship when they've already started to really like me and then spring it on them as an extra, but I don't wanna tell them when they don't already like me that much and might go tell people that we both know! Extremly difficult situation when trying to date girls from your area, lol.





ROFL ..... I didn't think the civility would last long.

Perhaps you anticipated it as a response to your latest nonsensical, snide remark. Look, if you're going to insist on seeking arguments, then can you please at least do it through a private message? I really don't want it overrunning what is otherwise a productive discussion.

[RozalynLove]

Rozalyn you need to take a deep breath. (Or, as Presh suggested in your visitor messages back in June – “Now I get your posts. You are just a child only 20 years of age, gonna come in this forum guns blazeing. May i suggest you chill out,”!) Calling people liars is sure way of alienating yourself from a lot open discussions on this board. If you want to get technical, yes I was wrong. There were only 4 you did not agree with.
1) Kelly : Why not have a cup of coffee together and 'chat' ?
Rozalyn: Well to be honest I don't see any good coming from telling her at all.
2) JohnH: a non-crossdressing man sure would not want to have those tops!
Rozalyn: I've always been like that, I've never seen the sense in missing out on something
3) Raychel: Why don't you have a talk with her and find out for sure.
Rozalyn: I think telling her is pointless
4) Karren: DON’T WEAR JEANS! Opps. Sorry. Wrong thread Mothers always know.
Rozalyn: I really do not agree with you at all.

It’s not until your fourth post you finally got around to asking the question you should have started with.
“I am asking in order to get people's opinion as to whether or not they think my Mum knows. That is all, I am not asking for people to give me advice based on assumptions they are making.”
So as not to ruffle any more of your feathers here is my answer.
Mum knows.

Jolly good, thanks for the input, g'day to you!


mom's are great people, mine is even sewing me a dress.
we went to the store and picked out a pattern and cloth to make it with.
we go shopping all the time. she loves to have a son and a daughter.


Mums are great people, aren't they?! I feel so bad for the people who have crap Mums, I don't know what I'd do without mine! Your Mum is making you a dress? That's fantastic! I can see why she'd love having that other side of you. Doing things like shopping with my Mum would be so great, and she might enjoy it as I'm an only child, but I'd hate if it ruined the son part!

[Julogden]

Yes, she knows and is letting you know that she's OK with it. And yes, you need to have THE talk with her.

You're getting invaluable advice from people here who have been through many more years of dealing with gender issues than you have and are now trying to help you, so why are you snapping at them?

You are still very young and sound to me to be somewhat conflicted about the whole issue. You need to realize that you have much more to learn about a lot of things, including yourself, so don't be too certain about who and what you are. You're just starting on your journey, and the end of the road is nowhere in sight yet.

Relax, tell your mom, she sounds like she'll be an ally on your journey. Perhaps you're right, maybe you are "just" a CD, but you need to explore your gender issues now, with an open mind, while you're young, and don't go into it with preconceived notions of who you are. We are often our own worst enemy when trying to achieve self-knowledge and self-acceptance. Let your mom help if she's willing to, that's an extraordinary opportunity that few of us get. ;)

Carol

[Danni Bear]

I do agree with you that buying me them was her way of getting me to open up about it, and I really wouldn't have a problem with her knowing as long as after it she acted as she does now. Although, I really do not want to open up in the sense of giving her every detail about it, because not only do I feel that it is potentially damaging to our relationship, but it is down right unacceptable for a Mum/Son discussion. I do not want her to feel like I want to hide it from her, but there is definetly aspects of the how and why that I'd like to remain private from her, do you know what I mean? Do you think that me accepting the tops in any way made her feel more included?

Rozalyn,
It is not an unacceptable conversation to have between a mother and son. As far as her feeling included in your life by you accepting the tops. That is problematic. Yes in some ways but not in the way she wants. Moms want what is best for any of our kids and try to do that. Changing your relationship with your mom is doubtful. It can make it better for both of you. She will always know you are her son and treat you as such when you are male, the upside is she will also have a daughter at times to share the female moments with. very seldom do parents want to know all the details of their childrens life, the exceptions come when we see destructive behavior.

Danni

[Kelly DeWinter]

Perhaps you anticipated it as a response to your latest nonsensical, snide remark. Look, if you're going to insist on seeking arguments, then can you please at least do it through a private message? I really don't want it overrunning what is otherwise a productive discussion.

My apologies, I won't reply to your nonsensical, snide remarks in this thread anymore as you requested, I am more then willing to reply in a private message if you choose to make them in private. However, expect replys to unwarrented personal remarks if you choose to post them in your thread. Again my sincere appologies. Peace ?

[t-girlxsophie]

the way I see it,your mother may want you to tell all,Its in your hands what you tell her and how you wish her to treat you once its out in the open.your mother loves you and will stand by you whatever path you choose,remember not every one of us has the support of our parents.I hope it all works out for the best

:hugs:Sophie

[RozalynLove]

Yes, she knows and is letting you know that she's OK with it. And yes, you need to have THE talk with her.

You're getting invaluable advice from people here who have been through many more years of dealing with gender issues than you have and are now trying to help you, so why are you snapping at them?

You are still very young and sound to me to be somewhat conflicted about the whole issue. You need to realize that you have much more to learn about a lot of things, including yourself, so don't be too certain about who and what you are. You're just starting on your journey, and the end of the road is nowhere in sight yet.

Relax, tell your mom, she sounds like she'll be an ally on your journey. Perhaps you're right, maybe you are "just" a CD, but you need to explore your gender issues now, with an open mind, while you're young, and don't go into it with preconceived notions of who you are. We are often our own worst enemy when trying to achieve self-knowledge and self-acceptance. Let your mom help if she's willing to, that's an extraordinary opportunity that few of us get. ;)

Carol

Hiya, thanks for the reply, I agree with you that she knows. I wouldn't mind confirming it with her if the opportunity to do so easily arose again, but I do not think I could just go about it in a 'hey mum, wanna chat?' kinda way, lol! I wrote all the reasons for why I'd wanna tell her and why I wouldn't wanna tell her a few posts ago, but the short version of it is that although I'd want some of the things that could come from it, I wouldn't want others that could possibly come from it, and I definetly don't want to go into details about it with her.

If you're interested in the details of that, and in the nature of my replies to the people who wouldn't listen to those details, please read my reply to pattytv in post #29

I do enjoy the expoloration of myself, and feel like I have an open mind to discovering anything. It is also the case though that I know exactally what I want from life in some aspects, and am focused on acheiving that, well also learning new things about myself. Thanks for the input.

[juligirl1984]

"I'm not meaning to assume or anything, but do you notice how when you talk about telling your Mum, you said 'when', and not 'if'? I think you want to! I totally understand what's stopping you, and I don't know your mum at all, but her non-reacting to finding her bras in your room might be a sign that she'll take it in her stride!"

GEES! you're good at reading between the lines! yes I do want to tell her for some reason. Or my sister. I have no idea why I need to tell them, but Its like I feel like they look at me confused all the time and wonder why I get moody and other things... might just be me being parinoid lol!. I almost spilled the beans tonight but I chickened out hard core lol!

[juligirl1984]

LOL I would feel bad for the shrink that would have to talk to me about this topic... funny how strangers are easier to tell than the loved ones... I guess if I tell them I could always say I stopped or something if they freak out too bad, but then thats not being honest with me... why oh why do we have to be different?

[Danni Bear]

"I'm not meaning to assume or anything, but do you notice how when you talk about telling your Mum, you said 'when', and not 'if'? I think you want to! I totally understand what's stopping you, and I don't know your mum at all, but her non-reacting to finding her bras in your room might be a sign that she'll take it in her stride!"

GEES! you're good at reading between the lines! yes I do want to tell her for some reason. Or my sister. I have no idea why I need to tell them, but Its like I feel like they look at me confused all the time and wonder why I get moody and other things... might just be me being parinoid lol!. I almost spilled the beans tonight but I chickened out hard core lol!

Julianna,

It's allright, moms know when their children are not right. We aren't able to know what that is but we do suspect. It is those suspicions that create the tensions and cause confusion. crossdressing is a small matter in the way we see our children, we worry more about whether you are mixed up in some type of illegal activity. Whether you are happy and healthy. It is not easy to start a conversation about this or any other sexual matter with your mom when you are a male. It tends to embarass most, but the one thing that most of us forget is she has seen and held us at the most vunorable points in our lives.

Danni

[RozalynLove]

Rozalyn,
It is not an unacceptable conversation to have between a mother and son. As far as her feeling included in your life by you accepting the tops. That is problematic. Yes in some ways but not in the way she wants. Moms want what is best for any of our kids and try to do that. Changing your relationship with your mom is doubtful. It can make it better for both of you. She will always know you are her son and treat you as such when you are male, the upside is she will also have a daughter at times to share the female moments with. very seldom do parents want to know all the details of their childrens life, the exceptions come when we see destructive behavior.

Danni

I don't think me telling her that I do like to dress in female clothing is an unacceptable discussion, but the details of how and why I do are definetly not a subject that I want to discuss with my Mum.

I get what you mean about feeling included in some ways, but not the ways that she wants, I hope that she can be without it also changing what we already have. Thanks!


My apologies, I won't reply to your nonsensical, snide remarks in this thread anymore as you requested, I am more then willing to reply in a private message if you choose to make them in private. However, expect replys to unwarrented personal remarks if you choose to post them in your thread. Again my sincere appologies. Peace ?

As I said, I really don't have anything to say to someone who gives 'correct responses' to their posts. If you don't reply to any of my remarks, anywhere, ever again, then you will never be in the position of having to ask for peace between us. If you reply to this, then I'm going to assume that you are desperate for an argument, or simply for the last word, and in either case you will be ignored. Goodbye.


the way I see it,your mother may want you to tell all,Its in your hands what you tell her and how you wish her to treat you once its out in the open.your mother loves you and will stand by you whatever path you choose,remember not every one of us has the support of our parents.I hope it all works out for the best

:hugs:Sophie

Well I know there definetly are things she does not want me to tell her everything about lol, but I think she probably does know about this, and wants me to tell her at least a part of it. I know she'd be accepting of me, it's just her way! Thank you for taking the time to reply!

[Kelly DeWinter]

As I said, I really don't have anything to say to someone who gives 'correct responses' to their posts.

Is it too much like school ? or did you prefer to answer in an essay form ?

If you don't reply to any of my remarks, anywhere, ever again, then you will never be in the position of having to ask for peace between us.

OK, I understand I have to reply in order to have peace, OK, Peace now ?

If you reply to this, then I'm going to assume that you are desperate for an argument, or simply for the last word, and in either case you will be ignored.

Not desperate, more like curious to see if I can still hold my own in verbal tit for tat with a 18-24 yearold ?

Goodbye.

Bye Bye



...

[RozalynLove]

GEES! you're good at reading between the lines! yes I do want to tell her for some reason. Or my sister. I have no idea why I need to tell them, but Its like I feel like they look at me confused all the time and wonder why I get moody and other things... might just be me being parinoid lol!. I almost spilled the beans tonight but I chickened out hard core lol!

Thank you, lol. I know this sounds rich coming from me who isn't sure about telling his Mum, but I think your Mum would be accepting and give you any support that she thought you needed! I think mine would too lol, it's just the what-ifs that get to you! You put your moodiness down to your crossdressing lol? Maybe I can do that! :P

[juligirl1984]

thank you! yes you are rite. Its the damn what-ifs that are stopping it all... yea I get stessed thinking about telling them and dressing up and the whole subject of it right now since its got to get dealt with here sometime soon. just stressful. I hope you can talk to her someday. but I think our situations are different. I don't even know if I'm ok with just cross dressing anymore... you seem to be ok with dressing and might not have to rock the boat too much? sorry It might just be an assumtion.

[pattyv]

There is an old saying-"Either S%*&t or get off the pot. Please tell your mum and let us all in peace. I'm outa here. I will respond no more.. Amen.

[juligirl1984]

aww that would be sad to not have supporting parents. sorry to hear that. I hope mine do. I know my dad will despise me but hell with him. I love my mom and sister most.

[Rianna Humble]

I'm not going to answer your "question" since that is pointless.

You say that you would like to tell your mum in order to have more freedom but don't want it to change anything :eek:

It is entirely up to you how much you say if you do talk to her. I agree with Danni that she is buying you those things as a way to get you to open up.

It is in your own hands whether you say anything to her - and thereby settle her worries and give you more freedom, or say nothing - and continue to make her worry about you and to restrict your own freedom.

If you really mean what you write about wanting to be sure she knows and also not wanting it to stop her seeing you as her son, then the only way to achieve that is through communication.

I won't ask you why you don't consider discussing what she bought since you have already snapped back at everyone who has tried to make helpful suggestions.

[juligirl1984]

is there any other girls that DID tell their parents? or siblings? if so how do you think you'd start the conversation?

[RozalynLove]

There is an old saying-"Either S%*&t or get off the pot. Please tell your mum and let us all in peace. I'm outa here. I will respond no more.. Amen.

I've aleady explained to you why telling her doesn't seem like the best option to me. To ignore me saying this, telling me to tell her again without saying anything about what I told you is so ignorant. Goodbye.


I'm not going to answer your "question" since that is pointless.

You say that you would like to tell your mum in order to have more freedom but don't want it to change anything :eek:

It is entirely up to you how much you say if you do talk to her. I agree with Danni that she is buying you those things as a way to get you to open up.

It is in your own hands whether you say anything to her - and thereby settle her worries and give you more freedom, or say nothing - and continue to make her worry about you and to restrict your own freedom.

If you really mean what you write about wanting to be sure she knows and also not wanting it to stop her seeing you as her son, then the only way to achieve that is through communication.

I won't ask you why you don't consider discussing what she bought since you have already snapped back at everyone who has tried to make helpful suggestions.

Why are you even posting when you say at the very top of it that you're not going to answer my question? God!

[Kelly DeWinter]

I've aleady explained to you why telling her doesn't seem like the best option to me. To ignore me saying this, telling me to tell her again without saying anything about what I told you is so ignorant. Goodbye.



Why are you even posting when you say at the very top of it that you're not going to answer my question? God!

Why are you consistantly antagonistic towards people, Has it become a childish game for you to see how many people you can insult in a day ? You have a lot of growing up to do. It'll only be a matter of time before you draw the ire of one or two of the moderators.

How about being a bit more civil towards the people here ? If you don't want to answer a post, then don't . You are going to find that people will answer posts weeks after you have made your 'point', it does'nt invalidate a members opinion just because you disagree, One of the benefits of this forum, is the years of wisdom accumulated by it's members.

Kelly

[Rianna Humble]

I think Rozalyn will not be happy until he has insulted so many people that he is in everybody's ignore file.

[Philipa Jane]

I have read all of the replies in this thread and I was curious enough to go and view RoslynLove's profile.
It appears she has no friends yet.

I wonder why that is???

[juligirl1984]

aw why do you keep antaganizing her? I know she was kinda blunt about her answers and all... honestly this thread has kinda helped out a lot for me if it means anything to you all that replied to her... thanks for that.

[Danni Bear]

aw why do you keep antaganizing her? I know she was kinda blunt about her answers and all... honestly this thread has kinda helped out a lot for me if it means anything to you all that replied to her... thanks for that.

Juligirl,

That is the reason so many reply to some threads. It is not only to help the OP but others that read them to. Everybody can gain from any thread, the anger that some show comes from smartass comments that come after someone tries to answer a post. This is something that we all do at times, when it happens to several different ones in the same thread, people notice and afterwards have very little to do with the one doing that. It's great that you did get help from what was said in this thread. Rozalyn, would have been better served if she hadn't been so uptight and saw that the positions taken were not meant as attacks but the heartfelt opinions and experiences of many on here that have been where she is and been through it before.

Danni

[juligirl1984]

thanks danni bear. yes I bet there is a lot of experience in this web page. I'm all ears on it.

[danielletorresani]

Definitely sounds like she knows. Or at the very least, she suspects and was wanting to see how you'd react to the tops she was giving you. By not refusing them, I think you confirmed it for her if she didn't know already.

[Kelly DeWinter]

aw why do you keep antaganizing her? I know she was kinda blunt about her answers and all... honestly this thread has kinda helped out a lot for me if it means anything to you all that replied to her... thanks for that.

It is not that he is blunt, lord knows I can be accused of that at times (only once or twice), It's the down right in your face insults that are offensive and uncalled for. When I first came on this board, I too was brash. The more mature members were quick to instruct me in the fine points of online ettiquite (sp). Yes I bristled at first, I even got some warnings from the moderators. In the end, I had realize my maturity level had to go up a few notches before I could consider myself a productive memebr of the board (the jury's still out on that one). He shows promise as a contibuting member, one he matures a bit.

[Rachel Morley]

I would hate to give up being treated like a man because I was seen as a woman.Gosh, I am different to you. I would love to not be treated like a man because I'm seen as more like a woman. :)