Ok Ok Ok Ok

[Lena Teegal]

Ok, I am posting this in an effort to get one up on one of my New Year's Resolutions. I often sit back and lurk and read and follow along on all the ups and downs and great information found here and other places. I am currently married and my wife is very supportive she helps me with makeup and fashion and "keeping it real". I love her very much. I couldn't ask form more. Especially after reading how some girls on here have a hard time with wives/families/friends etc... I consider myself lucky to have such a caring and understanding and not to mention hot wife.

But I am digressing what I want to really say is going forward I want to be out more and make real friends in the community. I am anticipating going to Triangles Cafe in CT soon. I was going to go tonight but a family situation arose and I can not. For the most part I am closeted my friends and family do not know and they probably never will, there just isn't any value to them knowing. I do hope though that I can make friends and go out and do stuff, dancing, shopping, or just get a pedi.

I don't post much because I never feel like I have anything to offer and I think that in not posting/replying I don't build any relationships to make friends I stay hidden in the corner so to speak. I really don't want to remain a wallflower but at the same time I am scared, not so much of being caught or read (although that is a little nerve racking too) but by being accepted by my own community. I always like to think of myself as daring and outgoing and I typically am just not as a girl.

So with that said I am going to post/reply more and get involved here more. Even if what I have to say is nonsense I am going to share it. I may make some people happy, I may make some people angry (for which I apologize now), some people may just not care and I am going to be OK with that. I intend on starting a blog, a blog about the girl side not really about CD/TG but about being a girl and my thoughts as one (I'll post back once it gets started in case anyone might be interested (presumptive of me isn't it (can you even embed parentheses?) )). Also I am going to make an effort to go out more to get comfortable with that side of me in public even if at first it is just within the community.

The 2nd to last thing I want to say is that my current name "Meghan" is old and have since changed it a while back but I am not sure how to update it on the site. In any case the correct name is Lena, Lena Teegal.

So the last thing I want to say (type) is thank you to everyone here for being here and sharing, although I was not participating it kept me from feeling alone.

Lena

[Lexine]

Even though you think you may not have anything to contribute to the discussions here on the forums, chances are you probably do. You yourself said that your situation is different than most here, and I think that by merely commenting or talking about this seemingly common issue in our community may help bring clarity to the matter rather than looking at people in one group, huddled, trying to figure out what's going on.

I don't pretend to be a pro at everything CDing... a lot of people here several years my senior have done this for several years compared to my almost one year of doing so. But I feel that joining discussions help with people to understand each other, and in a way, I'm helping people to try and see that not everything is cynical or stereotypical about people's views of us. By proxy, doing this helps me understand myself a lot better.

With that said, I think that it's wonderful that your wife is so supportive of you and, if at all possible, maybe take her with you to the TG club so that you won't feel too alone in your journey. I've met people who took their girlfriends to the clubs and they look so cute together. While I won't deny that there are some people in the community who aren't too accepting, a majority of our brothers and sisters are, and I know because I've met a lot of them. This is primarily one of the reasons why I can't stop doing this... I've met too many wonderful people as a girl that I cannot deny that this side of me exists and I'm proud of this and my friends' accomplishments.

Lena, your journey sounds like it's going to turn into something exciting not just for you, but for you and your wife and remember that we'll always be here should you need our help. Always.

And you CAN invite her to join the forums here too and contribute. I think she'd appreciate knowing that there are other people like her here as well.

[Chloe Renee]

I understand where you are coming from. But this is a community, and engaging even with small talk goes along way. It takes a village applies not only to children. I hope to see you around the forums more often.

[Rianna Humble]

Hi Lena,

Thank you for posting that. Lexine is right that you do have something to contribute which is unique to you - and that is your personal experience.

This site isn't about everyone saying the same thing, it's about all of us contributing form our own very personal point of vew. The fact that your experience is different to that of a lot of people you may have read makes sharing it more valuable, not less.

I'm glad that you have not only taken the decision to contribute more often but have already acted upon it. As we get to know you better through what you write, we will be better able to support you and to learn from you. :hugs:

BTW, to change your username on these forums you just have to send a Private Message to one of the moderators. Some do it in the forum issues section but that is not necessary as I understand it.

[t-girlxsophie]

I think its great Lena that you are going to make more of a Contribution to the site,Its nice to be able just to relay your experiences to others who will understand,I have replied to many threads,and started more than I thought I would,some nonsense probably spouted by me but Its just nice to know there is a place for us to express ourselves.Im sure the more you post the more comfortable you will be on the site,there is so many lovely People on here with so much sage advice to give

Im glad your Wife is supportive,mine is too and that does give us so much comfort to know they are by our sides,every step of the way.I Think your Blog sounds a fantastic idea,and I for one will look forward to reading it.Happy Posting :)

:hugs:Sophie

[Lena Teegal]

Thank you everyone for your kind words and support.
and Lexine after reading your reply for some reason (maybe because it was the first) I came very near crying,

It seems daunting at first to come up with all these words I'll need but maybe for a while I'll just disconnect my brain from the keyboard and let the heart talk :)