wondering.......

[michelle19845]

what all does it consist of when you (binge) your crossdressing.is it when you dress for a while ,then throw it out and then have the urge to dress later?what causes any of you ladies to do this.what has given you these urges through time to crossdress?things around home?how/what you feel like inside?

[Tristen Cox]

Denial, for the most part. It comes and goes and comes again. It's part of the game we play. AND it's normal! ;)

[Carlacd]

I can only think of the $$$ i have purged. Besides that some really nice heels, went away :( . As Tristen said, it comes and goes, such a bummer.

[Sweet Jeanette]

I have gotten rid of NOTHING yet! ---My wife wont let me! -----And, ---I am a packrat at heart! -- :D

[Khriss]

yup Tristen got it!
hehe... join the club !

best thing ever said here -"You are not alone" i'mthinkin'eh?"K"

[JocelynG]

I have only purged a couple of times,but I lost alot of clothes because of them. I will never do it again. I think it's a depression of sorts that comes over me and says why do I do this. I'm going to throuw it all out and become a normal guy and then later down the road that desire comes back and you want those clothes back. It's like buyers remorse only it's purging remorse and you want those clothes back so you start aquiring another expensive wardrobe

[GypsyKaren]

I've purged enough times over the years, I could have opened a boutique with the stuff. That's something I'll never do again. I guess it wasn't until I accepted myself for who I am that I just didn't feel right all the time about dressing. Now I know that you gotta be what you gotta be, and do what you gotta do. Once you do that, it all starts to make sense. Plus, being here, and knowing you're not the only one out there makes a big difference.
GypsyKaren

[Mx Justina]

The closest I ever came to any femme clothe dumping would have been in my young pre-teen years (due discovery risk, and fear of ostracism)...but at that time I didn't own anything particularly well-fitting or valuable... Beyond my youth, CDing is a lifelong view for me, no hyper masculine/femme extremes, and no rejection periods.

I don't doubt that many crossdressers go though "purging stages", but it's not every CD.

J.

[Deanna2]

The only things I have ever thrown out are pantyhose/stockings past their best-by date and shoes with broken heels.

Instead of purging why not give (some of) your femme gear to your wife/GF/SO as a present (for safe-keeping) and then borrow it back.

[Deborah_UK]

I purged many years ago, I didn't realise then that I wasTS, I was a closet crossdresser - (although the term crossdresser wasn't in use then - I only knew of the word Transvestite.)

I had met a wonderful GG who I loved with all my heart (and I still love her today despite the divorce). I was convinced that because my love for her was so deep I could live without dressing as a female, so I dumped all my femme clothes.

You can all guess the rest - it wasn't long after we married - she had to go away for a weekend to her mother's. I couldn't resist her stockings and suspender belt - and so crossdressing started. I could not bear the guilt feelings and told her about myself. We had counselling, we so wanted to make the marriage work, but she had lots of baggage of her own and could not cope with her husband wearing women's clothes. Her divorce petition made ugly reading.

Ooops gone off topic a bit! :o

Since then I've never purged - in fact I've still got some clothes in my wardrobe from when my wife and I split over 20 years ago - so 1980's!!! :D mind you it'll look great when the 80s stuff comes back into fashion! :cool:

[tullyxxx]

what all does it consist of when you (binge) your crossdressing.is it when you dress for a while ,then throw it out and then have the urge to dress later?what causes any of you ladies to do this.what has given you these urges through time to crossdress?things around home?how/what you feel like inside?hi yes did purge last year after yrs of dressing had lovely wardrobe then one day just up and dumped it all DISASTER now i have to start over again i couldnt give in 2 my urges my wife dosent mind me being dressed sny time so please what came over me IIIdont know but never again i now no i have 2 dress love grace

[michelle19845]

thank you for all your help.i've purged lots of times and didn't think i'd repeat purging,but here i amshopping for bras again! oh welll!

thanks,
michelle

[Lisa Maren]

First of all, for a CDer the term PMS means "Purging My Stash".

Thankfully, I've only purged once. That was the phase when I had "made a decision" to quit crossdressing because it didn't "fit into what I want for my life".

lol

It lasted four years and change, mind you, but there was one tiny little problem: That was the *wrong* decision! Telling myself that my crossdressing doesn't fit into my life is basically like telling myself that eating fruits and vegetables doesn't fit into my life. Sure, fine, I could go without fruits and vegetables but my health would go right down the toilet. Same thing with my crossdressing. I could stop, specifically, the crossdressing behavior, but doing so would necessarily entail smothering such a significant and meaningful and integral part of me that I couldn't be very happy that way. That would be called a living death. Frankly, it just would not be worth it. Therefore, neither is purging.

Truthfully, what really doesn't fit into what I want for my life is:
* Trying to be something I'm not to please others
* Smothering a side of me I love
* Ignoring a part of who I really am
* Eradicating a mode of self expression that makes me feel whole.

( Goodness, how did I get up here on this soapbox? :D )

I guess I'm lucky that I came to this conclusion after only purging once to the sum of perhaps $500 USD. Not too devestating , that... though I wish I had that red dress back... and the black, floral dress... and the tan corduroy skirt... hell I wish I had it all back! lol

Hugs,
Lisa

[parris james]

What :confused:

[Tiffy]

I purged once but not by choice. It was from 18 to 20. My first wife did not approve so I quit. Well she knew I quit for two years. But I still borrowed her panties when she was away. But, I could not stand it and we split and I have not purged since. Now that I am remarried and my current wife knows and aproves I doubt I will ever purge again. There is no way that she would let me with the amount of money she has spent over the past eight years. Besides, she likes me better around the house in fem, says I am not so grumpy. :) Go figure.

Kisses, April

[kysmet]

It's really surprising in my life that I have never purged. Unless you consider my second wife taking half my wardrobe in the divorce purging. ;)

I've never felt the desire to get rid of anything related to Ericka. When I finally realized what this all was, I came to the conclusion that she had been there all along. I just wasn't listening to her for the first part of my life. :D

Ericka Jean

P.S. I do donate old clothes and things that don't fit anymore, but I don't consider that purging because I do the same thing with my boy clothes.

[Jodi Lynn]

Gulit, shame, fear of getting found out, the hope of changing for good. These are the reasons I have purged. The only thing is that the need to dress never really goes away, in fact my need to dress has come back stromger and stronger every time. I have purged many times, but haven't for about 9 years. When my wife outed me this past April I feared she would purge for me as she took all my things and put them in the trunk of her car. But a few days leter she gave it back to me. While she doesn't like Jodi Lynn, it was a start when she gave me back all of my cloths and things. One TS friend of mine told me even when you put your things away for awhile and don't dress it is the same as a purge. If it is at least i have saved some money, giggles.

Hugs Jodi Lynn

[Denise Robinson]

i think mainly the once i have purged is in fear of being caught out by my then G/f`s. Its far easier to get rid of the proof and brush under carpet than to deal with it if you got caught. Now i am dressing more and always wear everyday. I would feel weird not to be fem. Wife still doesnt know that i am denise again.

hugs

[Kaitlyn Michele]

purging sux!!! everytime i've done it i've been sorry..lately i've got stuff in storage so i dont really have to "purge" as much as stay away from storage!!!

when i got out of college...i always had the stuff in trunk of car...i visited girlfriend in new york city, car got busted into overnight..what a surprise!!!

i wonder how much they got for the gaffe??? here's the kicker..i'm walking to car, i can see its broken into , my girlfriend is right there...i had all kinds stuff including poloroids of me, and tg fiction, fmi mags(remember them?)....

well i guess i'm the first robbery victim that was happy to be TOTALLY CLEANED OUT>. plus the squeezed shampoo all over the car so the gf didnt want to get in...

one thing that comes to mind is that alot of us take alot risks doing this and i wonder whether that is part of the allure

michele

[Sarahgurl371]

I used to purge every so often. What a horrible thing. That was back when I thought I was the only one like me though. knowinf what I do now, and having told my wife, I don't think I ever will again. There is a certain peace when you finally acknowledge to yourself and are honest with your wife, at least you don't have to be afraid of her finding your stash. I used to purge because of the guilt and shame, and the fear of her finding it all. Now, I am working on the guilt, why should I feel shame, and she sees it everyday in our closet. Only fear now is that if someone inadvertly goes into our closet and sees 9 pairs of size 11 soes and boots, my wife wears a size 6. Pretty easy to she they aren't for her. But ya know what, if they are in my closet, they see what is there, and they must be looking for something. I would never go into thier closet.