To the basics: Why do you cross-dress?

[spotlessMind]

This is something I'm VERY curious about! This question strikes me as one of the most pertinent and informative questions I could ask myself even:

Why do YOU cross-dress?

I can speculate as much as I want about others and I'm sure, for the most part, we know most of the reasons why each of us do. Typically I'd assume it's to express a feminine side that is screaming to get out. Or maybe it's just a simple hobby that you find entertaining. Possibly a sexual excitement for some. It could be a way to express feeling equally one gender as the other. Or maybe you are an entertainer and it's part of your current job. But sometimes I wonder if there are alternative reasons that some people have that I might be completely unaware of.

I could read through the thousands of posts to find some specific answers, but I thought I'd bulk it into a single new thread. This might be one people will enjoy searching inside themselves about, or maybe one that new members (like myself) can see and directly relate to!

So what is that driving primary reason for YOU?

[Karren H]

Because I'm driven to!! I have no clue why except my mother telling me I was supposed to have been a girl... Telling me a lot...

[Cari]

Plain and simple I enjoy it, it isnt hurting anyone and Im just wired this way.

I drove myself crazy for few years trying to figure out the why; maybe an answer will come in time.
The when, where and how interest me more these days.

[Jilmac]

I gave up trying to rationalize my dressing a long time ago. I don't really need a reason, I dress simply because I LOVE IT!

[Megan Thomas]

It feels natural for me. 'nuff said!

[TianaCross]

Plain and simple I enjoy it.

Lol, that about sums it up ;)

Anyway, dont know; dont think anybody really knows; i enjoy expressing that feminine side as u said, and i like the way i look - and, apart the enjoyment part - it probably is becouse i like how i look as well.

But for me, its the femme side expressing that its all about. But - call me superficial - if i didnt looke god doing it - i wouldnt feel such expression, lol.

When im dressed up, its really the right close for that side of my personality - its nothing more or less.
No sexual enjoyment from it, nothing like that; its just a more fitting suit for that gentle, but still quite crazy side of my personality.

As a man, people percieve me as kind of a rocker; en femme - im stil the 'rock girl'; so its not a switch of personality - its just a fisically more...umm.. well, probably more gentle and 'posh-rock', kinda ...the side of me that pays more attention to my body thats out there.

So, besides the feminine expression - its the 'taking care of my body' part that also has alot to do with the whole thing.

Good topic, though, i might come back as i get new ..well, not ideas, as i find the words that can describe what i really want to say, lol.

[kimdl93]

For me, it feels right to be in women's clothing. Why...I think because of some genetic or hormonal predisposition. I've been this way as long as I can remember.

[Sophie86]

I've come to view this question as being equivalent to "Why do you like to eat chocolate?"

Do I have to have a good reason in order to do something I enjoy?

I'm sure there are deep psychological reasons for why the desire took hold in my mind, just as there are physiological reasons for why I like chocolate, but what purpose would be served by trying to unravel them? It seems like a lot of hand-wringing for nothing.

[TianaCross]

Well, personally, i always love to find out every bit of myself - thats one of the reasons i crossdress - so i really think it is a good topic - but im one of those people that would like to find an answer even to the question 'why i like chocolate' ;)

Its a legitimate question - why do YOU crossdress... well, i think its a good topic, lol :)

[Christy_M]

I have no idea. I know it must be done and I know I cannot resist the urge. Maybe I am weak but after doing this for over 40 years, I have decided to stop fighting it...

[Davina99]

I just like to. When I was younger there was certainly a more overt sexual side to it. I would dress up and pop one off and then undress. That aspect diminished after my wife found out and I was able to dress at will instead of stealing precious moments when she was not around. I guess that the forbidden, and therefore more exciting, nature of dressing in secret increased the sexual arousal.

[Sophie86]

Well, personally, i always love to find out every bit of myself - thats one of the reasons i crossdress - so i really think it is a good topic - but im one of those people that would like to find an answer even to the question 'why i like chocolate' ;)

Its a legitimate question - why do YOU crossdress... well, i think its a good topic, lol :)

When I was 27, I wanted to know why also. Twenty years later I'm like whatever... just pass me my stockings. :)

[Debra Russell]

I try not to think about "why" I always have and despite what others have felt I have never felt ashamed -- only embarressed, and lately that doesn't bother me much any more. Regardless the "urge" is always there and I do so because I want to present as a woman when I am derssed. It feels so fullfilling:daydreaming:

[sabrinaedwards]

I wish that I knew the answer to this provocative question. I can say this, that I find it exciting to get "dressed up." Sometimes my hands still shake as I apply makeup and the silky feeling of slips, panties and pantyhose brings a smile. When my feet slide into a pair of high heels, I feel such a high. Finally when I put on that wig and look in the mirror, I am at the zenith of ecstacy. I thank God that I am a crossdresser and I am also appreciative that I can share my feelings with all of you!
Love, Sabrina

[littlemara]

I would have to agree with Sabrina. I just love it it makes me feel so good and it lets me escape the problems my male self has when I'm dressed up. I'm so carefree I'm so alive I'm so HAPPY :)

-Mara

[SusanMarie]

Being femme feels completely natural to me.

[TianaCross]

When I was 27, I wanted to know why also. Twenty years later I'm like whatever... just pass me my stockings. :)

or chocolate? ;)

lol, well, perhaps it is that...although never mind my age, i kinda love to search every psychological issue... guess im trying to say this - its not only the thing with CDing that the 'why' interest me, its everything...maybe it will, indeed, stop someday...but i dont think it will, just like the CDing ;)

and btw, i too am in the 'pass me my stockings' mood... just like to search the whole universe of the human mind :)

[Jamie48]

I've always cross dressed. I don't know why & don't care anymore. Stopped trying to figure that one out along time ago. It is just who I am.

[spotlessMind]

I've come to view this question as being equivalent to "Why do you like to eat chocolate?"

Do I have to have a good reason in order to do something I enjoy?

I'm sure there are deep psychological reasons for why the desire took hold in my mind, just as there are physiological reasons for why I like chocolate, but what purpose would be served by trying to unravel them? It seems like a lot of hand-wringing for nothing.

Sophie, I agree entirely about the simplicity and logic of self-acceptance. Albeit, I'm the type to really explore the soul on such things. You're right, you don't need a reason at all and maybe it's as basic as a predisposition to chocolate, though I'd say the desire for chocolate creates way less adversity! I'd never ask anyone with the intention of implying you NEED a reason. It's nothing more than curiosity. If you're the type who sees no purpose in "why" then more power to ya! =)

[Kaz]

One of the greatest things about this community is that many of us have now got past this stage!

Why do people climb mountains? Why do people sail the oceans? The usual response is that they are there... yeah, there is challenge involved, but why do individuals do specific "stuff"? Like clothes are there!

For better or worse I tried it, liked it, got hooked, then went into denial for years because of society pressure, then recently realised that that is all it is about... why do women shave their legs? What are the historical beginnings of this? A lot of the things women do is because it feels great and it is... so what if men thought of nude, hairless bodies first? Would things be different now?

We can over-analyse this stuff... I do it because I like it. It is a major challenge - the path that I am taking, but less challenging than others' paths - and it gives me profound joy and a feeling of being at one with the universe and myself.

So it isn't a why for me anymore... it is a how...

xx

[spotlessMind]

Well said, Kaz. So far from the responses, I'm picking up a trend. With experience, comes acceptance. Maybe the question "why" and me yearning to find answers for myself coincides with my complete lack of experience. Inner adversity might be something that time and practice can soothe? No doubt the same could be said for any remotely synonymous thing in life.

The absolute LAST thing I want anyone to think is that I'm implying "why" is a question you need to ask yourself! It's just a question that I ask myself and felt curious to ask others about. My apologies to anyone who felt intruded upon!!

[Barbara Dugan]

Now is easy for me to really feel good and to receive the attention of guys:)

[Kaz]

Hey Spotlessmind,

Most of us are always asking why...? This will also never really go away... acceptance is a compromise for many of us. For some it is easier or at least simpler... but we all struggle with this. I guess that is why we are here...

xx

[TianaCross]

yes, but there are people who like to go into 'why' as much as they like CDing...lol, im just saying that its... well, atleast with me... a fascination with every/any 'why'... why do people do the things they do...

And, as Sophie said, it could be becouse of my age that i personally am interested in this...but i dont think so, as i CD for as long as i remember and never felt anything bad regarding that... i would, for example, like to know why do i like white chocolate more then black chocolate...etc.

Its there, 'it just is' and theres no question about that...but some people have the fascination with eveyithing around them, and i consider myself one of them... its just a thing to think about, while geting into stilettoes ;)

[docrobbysherry]

How ELSE can I get with a young, hot babe!?

[Donna June]

For me it's an urge I've always had. It's fun, relaxing yet exciting and I suppose there is a bit of a sexual thing. Mostly, I feel I have the soul of a woman so I want to express myself as a woman as much as I can.

[Angiemead12]

The never ending question of why do we do it.

I do it because just like some of the rest here in only feels natural. Plus I love feeling pretty and sexy. Things not possible in male mode.

[MJ]

Because it's who i am..

[Jocelyn Quivers]

Current 2010 Answer. I just enjoy being me:)

[Krysta]

Why do I dress? thats a darn good question. For the most part i agree with the other gals, it just feels right! it makes me happy, so I do it!

but also its a way for me to relax, wind-down, recharge my batteries! I guess pampering myself with lotions, beautifying efforts (exfoiliating, etc), and pretty clothes counters and balances the rough and macho persona of my guy self. When I was younger it was more sexually related, but now not so much at all. Instead of thinking, I dress en femme, why do I do this? who am I? I am starting to think that i am dressing and CD'ing to get to that person that I am.....if this makes sense. LOL.

I too have thought alot about this, and havent gotten that far. I am thinking that on this topic, for me at least, its better to just accept it and rock on! easier said then done though!

[Rachel Morley]

My gender (the sex of my brain) is more aligned with what is considered typically female. It's difficult for me to fit the standard mold of a "man" in society. I find relief from these feelings when I present myself as a female and try my best to be accepted as such.

I also happen to believe that many of my best qualities reside with my feminine side—qualities such as sensitivity, tenderness, empathy, helpfulness, and patience. Expressing my femininity makes me feel relaxed, happy, and fulfilled, while suppressing it causes me stress, anxiety, and irritability.

[JohnH]

First reason: Because I might want to go outside the dull-as-hell men's fashions. Conventional formal wear for men is especially dull - the same old coat and tie affair, along with the usual flat shoes.

Second reason: If you wear a dress with hose and heels, or even just a skirt, you are considered a crossdresser even though I wear those garments with a masculine mindset. I for one am sick and tired of seeing everybody, my wife included, wear only pants and shorts.

Third reason: I don't like having to conform to being the typical masculine dude all the time. I do have a feminine side.

[Diane Lynn]

I enjoy it. I enjoy the cloths, makeup, everything about being a woman. I noticed I look in a mirror when ever I see one. I never do that as a male. I enjoy when adressed as ma'am. I enjoy the company of my SO.

[spotlessMind]

On a side note, I must say, it's really a gift to know and to see that many of you have significant others that are so understanding and willing to embrace this side of you. It would be way more than I'd expect, to receive even a fraction of that level of acceptance from the people in my life. Hmmm. Maybe I am being pescimistic though. Maybe I'd be more accepted than I'm predicting, but I don't know... I do know my family and friends quite well.

I've been watching and reading every reply to this like a hawk. Really interesting, thanks so much for sharing!! =)

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

why not!

[sissystephanie]

I have never had any desire whatever to be a woman!! But I have liked to wear their clothes since I was about 6 or 7. That was over 70 years ago, so please don't ask me why! The only reason I know is that I really like the fit, feel, and look of feminine clothing!! So I wear them!!

[spotlessMind]

why not!

That is both the most simple and sensible answer, and the most unfathomably deep one I can ever imagine hehe. Totally existential!! ;)

[spotlessMind]

I have never had any desire whatever to be a woman!! But I have liked to wear their clothes since I was about 6 or 7. That was over 70 years ago, so please don't ask me why! The only reason I know is that I really like the fit, feel, and look of feminine clothing!! So I wear them!!

Interesting. But I can't help but follow-up your reply with another question, if you don't mind.

If it were as simple as just enjoying the fit/feeling of women's clothes (which I think I understand), then what drove you to embrace it a step further and take a female name, and radiate a female "presence" here on this forum when you have no desire to be a woman? You can tell me to shutup if I'm overstepping! ;)

[Sophie86]

Here is a list of the reasons I came up with before I stopped looking for reasons:

1) It was the lure of forbidden fruit, the excitement of doing something naughty, and the risk of getting caught.
2) It was just one of many ways to feed my sex addiction.
3) It was a way for me, as a lonely teenage boy, to create the image of a living female with whom I could masturbate.
4) It was a way to escape the pressure of being a man.
5) It was a clothes fetish triggered by an early childhood experience.
6) It was an identification with femininity brought on by problems with my father, and the idealization of my mother.
7) It was an attempt to preserve those feminine traits that society tries to strip away from boys in the dehumanizing process of turning them into manly men.

You know, though, maybe it all really does just come down to wanting a bit of excitement. Life would be pretty damned boring without it.

[spotlessMind]

Here is a list of the reasons I came up with before I stopped looking for reasons:

1) It was the lure of forbidden fruit, the excitement of doing something naughty, and the risk of getting caught.
2) It was just one of many ways to feed my sex addiction.
3) It was a way for me, as a lonely teenage boy, to create the image of a living female with whom I could masturbate.
4) It was a way to escape the pressure of being a man.
5) It was a clothes fetish triggered by an early childhood experience.
6) It was an identification with femininity brought on by problems with my father, and the idealization of my mother.
7) It was an attempt to preserve those feminine traits that society tries to strip away from boys in the dehumanizing process of turning them into manly men.

You know, though, maybe it all really does just come down to wanting a bit of excitement. Life would be pretty damned boring without it.

WOW Sophie, what an insightful reply. Thank you so much! I'm especially intrigued by #3 and #6. I never really considered the possibility that there may be a form of narcissism involved for myself, or others. You really got me thinking, because I realize now when I day-dream about myself as a woman, there is a blatant self-sexuality there. As though my male self is attracted to my female self, and my female self is quite concerned with being beautiful for that. In terms of father issues, I can relate to that a lot but I'd rather not talk about it. You really got me thinking!

[Jay Cee]

'Cause I'm tired of being a guy, and looking and acting like a one.

[TommyII]

The older you get, the more you just do. I do because I like it or it feels good. The logic for the why becomes secondary. If you like it, so what for reason?

[spotlessMind]

The older you get, the more you just do. I do because I like it or it feels good. The logic for the why becomes secondary. If you like it, so what for reason?

Definitely noticing that consensus in this thread. I like to ask myself "why" but I also welcome the idea that, in time, I may stop thinking and asking myself "why" and just indulge and embrace without worrying so much.

[charlie]

Hello Spotless and welcome to the forum! I hope you enjoy coming to the forum and talking and reading about people just like us as I do! As for why I dress....it seems that what started out being a sexual thing in my early years turned to really loving women and wanting to be one. Now it just feels natural to get all dressed up, become the best woman that I can be and get out and be me. After being dressed for a few days, I really feel sad going back to my male self and returning to being a husband and father. I now dress because I feel compelled to. I love the feeling of being feminine, soft, flirty, and pretty. What really surprises me about this post are the answers where so many of us just say they have no idea why they dress. The truth be told....life would be much easier if I didn't and I could stop. My wife hates that I crossdress. She also is quite jealous of my feminine self and loathes "Charlie" as if she is someone that I love as much as her.

[StaceyJane]

Because I've always wanted to be a woman....

[VtVicky]

Strictly fetish for me. I love the feel and look of satin and nylon, especially lingerie. It is a clasically conditioned response to being exposed to lingerie during early sexual arousal. And, as I matured, I nurtured it with increasing exposure to dresses and dressing. By continued pairing of CDing and sexual arousal over the years, I have developed a fairly comfortable erotic/CDing life. Since I am divorced and living alone, I get to dress as much as I like. Over the years the sexual intensity has diminished somewhat, but it is always there at some level. I have no interest in make up or wigs. (I've tried them. But, they are more trouble than they are worth to me.) High heels are nice for the look. But, the pain is seldom worth the gain.

I don't think the majority of the members of this forum fall into my category. But, I do believe there are more of us who have zero interest in passing, or being perceived as female.

It feels good. It looks good, as long as I don't get too critical. And, it has the effect of arousing my senses. [Especially, the ones that alert me to someone coming up my driveway. ;-)]

[Melinda G]

I recall snooping in my mothers dresser drawers when I was 12. When she threw out a pair of high heeled sandals, I fished them out of the trash and saved them. It was onward and upward from there. Go figure.:D

[Cari]

SpotlessMind : I gave you a very short answer earlier kinda unfair.

I think its natural to try to find out why. I read allot of articles, asked others and even studied the religious side of it. Just because I didnt find an answer; doesnt mean there isnt one for anyone else.

The real reasons I stopped asking why and just started saying "I enjoy it" was that

1: I got bored reading Psych journal articles.

2: Over time I learned how to deal with it better just through experience. The first time your dressed and hear a knock on the door is pretty traumatic and exciting. Once you survive the first one its not as big a deal.

3: I dont know if the answer would change anything.

[spotlessMind]

SpotlessMind : I gave you a very short answer earlier kinda unfair.

I think its natural to try to find out why. I read allot of articles, asked others and even studied the religious side of it. Just because I didnt find an answer; doesnt mean there isnt one for anyone else.

The real reasons I stopped asking why and just started saying "I enjoy it" was that

1: I got bored reading Psych journal articles.

2: Over time I learned how to deal with it better just through experience. The first time your dressed and hear a knock on the door is pretty traumatic and exciting. Once you survive the first one its not as big a deal.

3: I dont know if the answer would change anything.

Not to worry, Cari =) and thanks for elaborating, and that third thing you said is PROBABLY true, which ANNOYS ME LIKE YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE lol! It'd be awesome if knowing the answer would result in the extinguishing of all the struggles a person might have (like me). Like some kinda eureka ;) But i've always been an idealist more than a realist /sigh

[Melinda G]

Why we crossdress is always going to be one of lifes little mysteries. Anybody who claims to know, is just guessing. Just go with it, and enjoy it for what it is, and don't feel guilty about it. You only have one life to live. Might as well enjoy it. And just thank god your not one of those macho neanderthals cruising the smokey bars looking for some tramp for the night.

[Diane Smith]

I have to do it. It is who I am. I'm sure there is some complex combination of genetics, my parents' behavior toward me when I was small, and other early life experiences that caused this side of my personality to flower, but the details are lost to the mists of time and probably not completely understood anyway. I try to accept it as a normal part of my life and move on, doing what I do with as much competence and aesthetic style as possible, like the other aspects of my life.

- Diane

[Melinda G]

I consider it a blessing! I can be a guy and do all the guy stuff when I want. And then I can become an attractive woman for a night or a few days. It's the best of both worlds. Like living two lives.

[AmberM]

I cross dress for several reasons-
My fiance loves and accepts me exactly as I am and she's helping me become Lauren. We are looking forward to our first girl's night out
The sexiness, variety, and comfort of women's clothing
The strong social bonds of women and how much fun they have with girlfriends.
I have a very strong feminine side.

[KateSpade83]

I crossdress because I love the beauty of female clothes. I also would rather be a beautiful woman than my guy self. It's part fetish too as I prefer female sexuality than being male.

I'd rather wear a skirt suit than a boring man's suit. That's why I have only 1 good man's suit and over 120 skirt suits.

I love going out in drag and shopping as a woman. But I haven't been doing that much lately.

[Kate Simmons]

Most will say they don't know or don't care, it's who they are, etc. There are ,however, deep feelings that drive the need. If we are ever to get a handle on these feelings they need to be addressed. Many though are either afraid or unwilling to do that as a sense of impending doom is felt when the feelings are approached. I know because that is the way I felt for years until I really decided to get to know myself.:)

[Rebecca Sue]

I feel the urge to dress in feminine clothes. I don't know why I feel the urge, I just do. And I like going with the flow of it.

[erickka]

I gave up trying to rationalize my dressing a long time ago. I don't really need a reason, I dress simply because I LOVE IT!

Also, because I can!!

[Rogina B]

Being interested in wearing female clothes and acting female SEEM TO ME that it is something we are born with.Sure we were curious,or had help exploring[my mother helped me explore] the feelings of dressing.But for so many of us,it was so young,that we had to already have that desire in us. And,it doesn't go away..we can supress our feminine side,but she always returns! I have always been in awe of the "power of the pussycat"[getting men to do foolish things]. Dressing and being out and about allows me to feel an occasional bit of the "power."

[Patricia Jane]

I have asked myelf that same question for years.I enjoy doing it, but because of my catholic school background (12years) I felt guilty, but still enjoyed dressing, I finally convinced myself that I was not hurting anyone. My wife has know for forty plus years. Now I dress every day when I can. I crossdress because I enjoy doing so!

[charlytuna]

My wife ask that me that question all the time all I could tell her I don't know why I dress I just love the feel of a tight bra around my chest, the feel of the spftness of a pair panties and just the need to dress. I been trying to come a exact reason for YEARS and I can not come up one reason but totally enjoying dressing, My wife knew about my dressing before we got serious with each other and that was 32 yrs ago she still trying to accept it fully but does and very supportive

[nicole12]

when i was younger it would be totally a sexual thing 100%, it was the feel of being a woman , the feel of the clothes that made it so exciting.
Now as i am older its not quite as strong sexually but i still do love the overall feeling . i feel alot more sexy dressed en fem than in drab, if i could act more womenly and not be so insecure about being out i would dress more.

[Mackenzie]

I've thought about this alot. This summer one of our daughters called me and said that they found my wigs and makeup and that the youngest daughter was scared that I was gay. Well, I was so embarassed that I purged almost everything.

Then that got me thinking. Why do I really enjoy to put on a nice bra and panties, slip into some nylons, put on makeup, etc. I really don't have a concrete answer. But to me, from time to time, it's enjoyable. I like to look in the mirror after I am made up and see that I can pass fairly well and I enjoy the look.

My precious wife does not mind and has come to accept that I like to cd from time to time. It is not a consuming thing for me. But I guess that since it is different and let's me explore my feminine side, I find it to be a stress release and something just "fun".

I do have a jealousy in my heart that ladies can flip flop between getting all dolled up or dressing like a guy and society doesn't care. But when a guy decides to dress like a girl, watch out!!

M.

[JohnH]

I do have a jealousy in my heart that ladies can flip flop between getting all dolled up or dressing like a guy and society doesn't care. But when a guy decides to dress like a girl, watch out!!
M.

Those are my feelings also.
More of us have to start dressing more like girls and do it openly for guys to dress like girls to become acceptable.
As I have written before there was a time when pants were not acceptable for women.

John

[Nicole Brown]

Well, according to the discussions I have had with my therapist, I cross dress because every journey must have a starting point. For me, dressing as a woman and presenting myself as a woman is a natural evolution in my life. Thus for me, the simple answer as to why I cross dress is that I haven't begun my transition yet.

[Debglam]

I also happen to believe that many of my best qualities reside with my feminine side—qualities such as sensitivity, tenderness, empathy, helpfulness, and patience. Expressing my femininity makes me feel relaxed, happy, and fulfilled, while suppressing it causes me stress, anxiety, and irritability.

Ditto!!

To answer your question though, nature, nurture, who knows. . . For me it is a piece of the whole me - too long surpressed! I think some of my finer qualities, the ones Rachel mentions, stem from this desire.

[Debglam]

Being interested in wearing female clothes and acting female SEEM TO ME that it is something we are born with."

I agree. I can't think of any incident, i.e. being dressed up by someone else, as a child that would have given me this desire. Just the way I'm wired. . .

[JohnH]

Here is a list of the reasons I came up with before I stopped looking for reasons:
...

7) It was an attempt to preserve those feminine traits that society tries to strip away from boys in the dehumanizing process of turning them into manly men.



I am thankful that my father never tried to strip away my feminine traits to try make me into a "manly" read - insensitive man. I really hated that my maternal grandfather, who had only daughters, tried to do that with me. Thank goodness Grandfather was not around much.

If my father wanted me to do something it was almost always a pleading request instead of a command. That approach worked much better.

John

[PippaJ]

I want to be a girl. Pure and simple :)

[RylieCD]

I wish I could answer an actual why, it is something I have asked myself over and over, Why am I like this, what made me have the "urge"?. Xdressing started when I was a teenager mainly out of curiosity, but when I first tried something just said this was right, while everything else said no no no. But from the first time I tried something on, I was hooked. Now all I can say is it is away for me to escape and relax, I know it is just clothes to much of the world but to me it is like getting an extra hug.

[Jennifer Cox]

Because I'm driven to!! I have no clue why except my mother telling me I was supposed to have been a girl... Telling me a lot...

:yt:

[Chickhe]

I think 'why' is the one question any true CDer can not answer. All I know, I like doing it and it makes me feel good.

[JulieC]

Because I want to.

Like others, I gave up trying to figure out the 'why', and have since spent time focused on accepting me as me, the 'how', the 'where', the 'when', and the 'what'...especially the 'what' :)

[GaleWarning]

I crossdress because I love to wear stockings and high heels!
And because I cannot see any reason why I should not wear any item of clothing I choose to.

[Crissy Kay]

I cd to punish myself for war crimes I may have commited in my previous life as a Waffen SS trooper in WW2.

[Jenniferpl]

I always wanted to be a girl when I was young and now I want to be woman. That has never gone away as much I wish it would. My life would be much simplier without it.

[tricia_uktv]

See my sig. Because it is me!

[Ann-Marie]

I crossdress because i like the choice of cloths available to females.
I enjoy putting them on and getting in touch with my feminine side

[Lee Andrews]

Why? Why? Why?

Well isn't that the million dollar question. I still wonder why time to time and read articles when I come across one hoping to find something that pertains to my situation but for the most part they never do. Everyone is a little different. I always admired my mother when she dressed up for work. I was always amazed how she went from boring, drab mother and housewife to a sophisticated, beautiful lady ready to take on the business world everyday. I know that is the reason I started but why would a young boy that loves to do everything a boy does get an urge to put on his mothers undergarments and clothes and pretend to be a girl once and a while?

What made me put on those first pair of pantyhose that first time way back when?

Why was that urge so strong?

Why wasn't that one time enough?

What I do know is that I enjoy the feeling of nylons, my favourite. By extension the look of high heels on a great pair of legs. I love the look of my painted toe nails. If I could go in public with just nylons, high heels and a nice pair of jeans I would be a happy man. I try not to dwell on it anymore because I feel it is a waste of time and energy. If one day the light bulb in my head goes off and the answer presents itself great. If not then I will just try and enjoy the cards I've been dealt in this crazy thing we call life.

[NicoleScott]

How ELSE can I get with a young, hot babe!?

At first, Doc's answer to the question may seem to be comical, flip, tongue-in cheek. But there are many of us who crossdress for the purpose of, and in the style of, creating the ideal hot, young, sexy, beautiful woman of our dreams, as we picture it. My very own designer woman, created just for me. If only a "real" woman could excite as much as a reflection in the mirror.

[Tina B.]

I've dressed for over 60 years, spent many years trying to find out the why of it all. I've read many theory's, and came up with a couple of my own, but the only thing I know for sure is, there is no simple answer to a complicated question. Some may do it for fun, or style, me I like Karren, am driven to it. At times in my life I have tried suppressing the desire, I wanted to be "normal", but when I was being normal, I found myself depressed, sullen, and angry all at the same time, I was miserable, and at times I will admit to having suicidal thoughts even. So for me I stopped asking myself why, and started asking myself how. The answer to that was to come clean with my wife, tell her all about Tina, and either we would work it out, or I would have to do it on my own, but the fight was over. I am still in the closet, by choice, but I dress at home about half the time. It keeps me happy and sane, and the wife doesn't mind having a girl friend that cooks and cleans house, so it works for us, and I no longer really care why, I wouldn't give it up now days even if someone came up with a "cure".
Tina B.

[Jonianne]

Eazy one.

Even as a male, I have a desire to identify with females. You don't have to actually be a Pittsburg Pirate (or Pinguin, ala Karren) to wear the jersey that the players wear, just a fan who wants to identify with them.

[Raychel]

Pretty simple I guess, I like womens clothes. With life being as stressful and hard as it is sometimes, This is one thing that I do for me. I simply relax and enjoy fine womens clothes.

[TracyBoy]

I don't have a real good answer. That's one of the reasons that I joined this forum. Maybe in time I'll figure out why. All I know is that I really like to crossdress, and the more feminine that I can make myself, the better I feel. It also does excite me sexually when I'm dressed.

[Debutante]

I have an inner need, or urge, or desire to dress as a girl or woman. It is both erotic (in the general sense of eros),
and to feel myself in the self-identity as female. I am stuck being a male, but the desire to look and feel and be female can be strong sometimes.
It's an inner desire...

[Zoie]

I think I crossdress because of the economy (lol joke) it's all obama's fault.

I wish I knew that answer ;)

[drushin703]

Why do I crossdress? Hell, I dont know.And after so many years, I really dont care.I am sensitive to what other
people think about it, (the device and the mechanics and perhaps the morphology) whether they think ime just
a gay male or from another world, but how does one explain the fantastic? ........dana

[Crysten]

Please don't get me wrong....I'm not dismissing this question as silly...but this question is silly, I guess. Why do I dress? Since I was old enough to walk I have dressed, and continue to do so, and can't see any reason why I would stop. I also breathe in and out. One will stop when the other stops. Reasons? No reason, it just IS. Good enough for me.

[donnalee]

Damned if I know; it just IS.

[Lucy_Bella]

Because I'm driven to!! I have no clue why except my mother telling me I was supposed to have been a girl... Telling me a lot...

I was told that by my mother many times..I have two older brothers and my parents wanted a girl and instead ..LOL..Got me.. A little curly headed bundle of joy ..She never rejected me tho and always said she was happy with all of her kids .. I do feel that while in the early stages of prenancy the mother may have some effect to hormone unbalances..

[spotlessMind]

A handful of the replies seem to be a passive-aggressive rebuttle to asking the question "why" at all. I realize that for some it may be a tender topic, and there may be some form of inner conflict that results in a rejection of validity, but I think for most it's an interesting experience to explore the "why". I know it has definitely helped me understand a few things better for myself! I noticed a few have implied that this thread has been valuable for them even if, at the very least, to connect with an understanding of themselves vicariously through another. Productivity is productive.

What I'm saying is, whether "why" is a valid question or not... isn't really the question ;)

[suscd31]

I've just learned to accept it in my life after years of on and off dressing. I just feel complete when dressed. I dont know lol plus I think I make a better girl than guy haha

[ninapuella]

I have tried in so many ways to just quit dressing, but i am always coming back. And that is because I dont feel good when i dont do it. I get big stress-problems and really dont feel well at all. So now i just let it go. Hopefully i will be able to stop sometime, but i doubt. It just feels to naturally to express my body in a way that really works. I think its a part of expressing something that i cant express as a guy. I have always been clear with that if i dont pass as a girl i will quit immideately. Its the pass that is the thrill for me, nothing else.

[Maria 60]

I don' know why, but days when i am alone i put on a skirt and pantyhose and just relaxes on the couch. I would never relaxes like that in male mood.

[Nancie64]

I read most of the replies and we all seem to have a little different reason for taking to the fem side. Just turned the big 65 a couple of weeks ago and I know I have many reasons for dressing and some are pretty complicated. I love the feel and the look when I gaze into the mirror when in fem mode. A little sexual. I think my top reason is that I seem to feel 20 years younger. Why, I have asked myself that a thousand times, no answer. Started when I was like 14 and try to dress at least once a week now. Usually stay dressed all night and hate to change in the morning.

[Carly D]

Because I'm driven to!! I have no clue why except my mother telling me I was supposed to have been a girl... Telling me a lot...

My mom told me I was supposed to be a girl as well but later told me she was glad she had three boys instead seeing how girls seem like they are hard to raise, or she sees all the women around having a good lot of trouble.. Why I cross dress? I have no clue why I started, all I know is with the best of intentions every time I tried to stop it came back as every time before.. I wish I knew why I had and still do have the urge to wear womens clothing.. All I do know is that while I have had a fairly long lull in not dressing up at all (although I do wear shoes daily) I know that if I were to try to throw everything away now, the likelihood is that within a few days I would miss it and dive head first into the deep end once again.. It's the knowing that I have the clothes that keeps everything in ok shape.. I guess..

[Engendered]

What I'm saying is, whether "why" is a valid question or not... isn't really the question ;)

It is a bit frustrating to read replies that almost dismiss your question. If people don't think it's something worth considering or answering, then they should just find the next topic they like. :)
I'm going to have to get back to you with my answer. I'm curious what my precise motivation is at the moment I decide to change from boy mode to girl mode. I want to do it, but *why*? And no, "I do it because I want to" isn't a good enough answer. The interesting thing of course, is that there *is* an answer. There is a definite reason why for each of us. Just as there's a answer to why people like chocolate, although that's easier to trace via chemical reactions and endorphins. :)

I do get a sense that some of the reluctance a few have about probing the why, might be due to what they might find. None of us wants to find out that due to some key event in our childhood, we were somehow conditioned to take solace becoming the other gender, and that really it's all in our heads afterall, and that's not something I personally believe. Although, *everything* is in our heads I guess. :D

[Davina-Alba]

Because I totally, utterly, wonderfully adore it like nothing else in the world.

Firstly I get, in the right circumstances, immense sexual pleasure from cross dressing.

Secondly, as an habitual underdresser, I feel more positive about myself, more self aware and confident, and I am also much nicer to my co-workers and staff.

Seems good enough reasons to me.

[Stephanie47]

When I first cross dressed I did it for sexual pleasure, but, then again I did not need to be dressed en femme to self gratify myself. So, why? I do not have the foggiest idea. Now I cross dress to relieve the mind of the burdens of war inflicted many years ago. Getting fully dressed changes me into a woman (at least mentally) as I do the chores around the house. It's less destructive than consuming abnormal quantities of booze and drugs, although those may be less costly than buying clothes!

[sometimes_miss]

If you don't want to read my bio, which explains it in detail, basically I always feel like I'm in the wrong clothes when I'm dressed as a male. But there's much more to it.