Dressing question from a GG

[SweetPea_GG]

I recently found out about my husband and so im a bit curious about a few things and thought I would ask a question here to just see the different responses.

If you fully dress or partly dress (under your male clothing) Are there ever times where you go through dry spells where you don't dress at all for a certain amount of time and if so how long? Talking basically that you don't feel you want to dress for a period of time.

Thanks in advance :)

[GaleWarning]

Yes.
Don't really know why, but yes, there are long, dry spells.

[Karren H]

I go through periods of days, weeks or months where I'm just too lazy or don't have the need to dress... Especially after an extended period of dressing like the last 7 weeks! I shouldn't need to dress again till 2012! Lol.

[Heather_Marie]

Hi SweetPea:

You are talking about "The Pink Fog" the time we/I like to dress up. Yes there are times that I do not feel like dressing up I would say the time frame would be weeks I like to dress up and about two weeks off but that varies from time to time I do not know what triggers me to dress I just go through phases of wanting to dress. I feel I like to dressup more times then not. However I always underdress I do not think I will ever give that up.

[Mary Morgan]

Yes sorta. At different times in my life, because of other issues, raising children, work, military service, etc, I have gone as long as 4-5 years between dressing times. Since retiring, I dress often, at least a few hours several times each week. At 63, I am not as concerned about those other pressures, and although my wife doesn't participate in my dressing, she allows me the freedom to do so. I therefore do not dress when it might be an issue for her. I will tell you that indeed there were times when not dressing was no big deal, but as I have gotten older, I think it would be harder to stop for any length of time. Of course we are all different.

[jazmine]

yes. i go through cycles. Sometimes my female side is the farthest thing from my mind. It's like Jasmine went on vacation and left the house to my male side. Sometimes it feels as though my guyside went on vacation. I learned to embrace and enjoy these cycles. I have a million hobbies, and most of them are associated with my male half. So there are a lot of times i underdress. Also, it's not a totally even cycle. Sometimes Jasmine will be fighting for the "wheel" eight or more months straight. Sometimes my female side will be in the forefront for only a month or so. Sometimes I go the whole summer feeling only my guyside and will only crossdress once or twice during that time. It's hard to pin point the cycle. It just happens. I could never get a sex change, cause it wouldn't solve anything or make me feel more complete. I have come to understand that i am both genders.

[prene]

There could be a time.

Haven't had it yet.

GG's clothes feel so much better I just wish I had the natural breasts and absences of something to make those clothes fit better.

[Shelly Preston]

Hi Sweet Pea

Yes we do get times with long periods of not dressing

No one really knows why or for how long

I think this is something which affects each individual differently

There are so many factors which can affect someones dressing its impossible to pin down a reason why

[k lynn]

I partly dress daily and have for years been this way since childhood and I am now 47

[SweetPea_GG]

thanks everyone for the replies it was just something I was curious about and I knew everyone would have their own answers unique just like all of us are made :)

PS- LOVE LOVE LOVE the tinker bell images.. i am 100% tinker bell freak.. have a tinker bell tattoo even :)

[pernille d]

some times i underdress and sometimes i dont, and sometimes i feel like doing it everyday and sometimes there can be a break of a few months .We are all different why and to what extent we dress so i am quite sure there will be a lot of different answers , but the thing that interests me more is "why" you ask the question .Why not ask your husband how he feels and his views as maybe the answers you are looking for are more closer to home than you think:)

[Shelby]

There are times when after dressing I don't wear any female items for days or weeks at a time. It all depends on what is happening in my life and sometimes it just takes a lot out of me to look like a girl. Do you dress up to the nines everyday? Just dressing up once in awhile for a special event takes time. The advantage you have is that you have a jump start on us looking good whereas we have to do a lot more shaving and grooming and man does that take time.

[SweetPea_GG]

Do you dress up to the nines everyday? Just dressing up once in awhile for a special event takes time. The advantage you have is that you have a jump start on us looking good whereas we have to do a lot more shaving and grooming and man does that take time.

oh my gosh good question.. I hardly ever dress up.. i think after my 3 children and caring for them 24x7 I was just so exhausted.. for many years i would just throw my hair back and wear my jeans and a shirt or my PJs if i was staying at home lol..i had no desire to dress up even though my husband would always want me to but hes crazy :p in a good way.. tell me i should dress up to clean the house lol..but finally last week I did dress up and went to his work to suprise him.. he was very surprised :) made me feel good but boy i couldnt do that everyday i remembered how time consuming it was.. i have more things i need to spend my time on.. but once in awhile it does feel nice.. and makes me feel better inside.. but i will never give up my lazy days lol

[Joanne f]

I only have female underwear so that is worn all the time , i dress endogenous all the time in daily activities as i have found this to help keep the real bad need to dress at bay most of the time but it does slowly creep in so i have to go all the way some times so i can`t really say that i have complete dry times, if i have to be all male on special occasions then i am happy to do so , saying that my black suit is female trousers and male jacket .

[Roxanne_Alternate]

Yup, sounds familiar.

One week I dress up every day, the other week I just can't be bothered. Depends on my mood and urge, I can't explain much more than that. It just comes and goes.

[Heather_Marie]

thanks everyone for the replies it was just something I was curious about and I knew everyone would have their own answers unique just like all of us are made :)

PS- LOVE LOVE LOVE the tinker bell images.. i am 100% tinker bell freak.. have a tinker bell tattoo even :)

Thank you from a tinker bell freak too, I just love that little tink if I was to get a tattoo that would be the one I would get she is amazing I own all of the movies.

[Maria in heels]

sometimes I partially dress (underclothes) but not as much as before. There are definately times of "dry spells" when you just don't have the energy or time. Sometimes I can go for a few weeks, but every couple of days I will wear a pair of heels just to feel Maria...hope this helps

[sissystephanie]

When my dear late wife was alive there were frequent periods when I didn't dress at all for a variety of reasons. Mostly, just didn't want to bother! Yes, she did know about my crossdressing and fully supported me doing it. She always knew that I was her man no matter what I wore.

Now that she is gone, I do dress, at least underdress, almost every day. But there are still times when I just don't feel like doing it. No real reason, just no desire! BTW, I am a very senior CD! I am 78 y/o, and started my CD experinces when I was 6 or 7!! Longer than most of the CD's on this forum!

[SweetPea_GG]

I own all of the movies.

Me too! lol.. and I usually have my husband watch one with me when a new one comes out lol..when we got a german shrunk which is like a american entertainment center on steroids i had one whole side that was mine there i put all my tinker bell fairy stuff..husband thought i was nuts and would make fun of me (all in fun ofcourse) but he also contributed to my collection by buying me stuff too lol


! BTW, I am a very senior CD! I am 78 y/o, and started my CD experinces when I was 6 or 7!! Longer than most of the CD's on this forum!

:) oh wow! Now that your wife is gone do you have any other family support other then reaching out on the forums here?

[Holly]

I "dress" daily. I don't always wear a lot of makeup, accessories, or opt for heels 'n' hose and so forth. It doesn't make sense to me to get all dolled up to scrub the floors, clean the bathrooms, cut the grass, shop for groceries, etc. So I will dress appropriate for the goals I need to accomplish... most often jeans and a comfortable top with little or no makeup. Now if meeting a friend for lunch or going out with my wife, I'll take the time to put on a nice face, do something nicer with my hair, add a little "bling," and so on. Clothing will depend on the time of year and the activity engaged in. Going to the theater (live) I'll wear a nice dress. To amusement parks, I usually wear a skirt and top in the spring and summer and pants and a top in the fall and winter. When dining out, casual clothes unless the establishment is upscale. Clothing is simply a necessity to provide warmth and cover. However properly used, it does afford me the chance to express myself and help others learn a little about what is going on inside my mind. The dressing, for me, at least, in not an end goal in and of itself. It has become a means to an end... the end being to be happy and content with who I am and to be at peace with my self. I am finding that I can be happy being the "pretty" me and just as happy being the "domestic" me. Dressing is not about being or becoming something I am not. It's about being true to whom I am. And because of that, there are no "dry spells."

[Naomi Rayne]

A Majority of the time i am not dressing because as Shelby stated above it does take time to look good, but there are other times where i feel like dressing and ill put on all the stuff and just do some simple makeup. Long hair so no need for a wig. As far as underdressing goes that happenes pretty much every day for me. There are times where i dont feel like it but most of the time a pair of panties and some hose is what i like to wear. As a side note im currently also doing it because of the weather. Helps keep me warm :D

[Zoe Preston]

.. but once in awhile it does feel nice.. and makes me feel better inside..

Well, you've just stated why I dress :D

Personally, I only fully dress but there can be long periods in between. Sometimes I don't feel the need but equally I don't always have the opportunity.

Are you hoping that a long dry spell indicates a waning desire to dress? Everyone's different but it's unlikely.

Zoe

[SherriePall]

Before I came out to my wife about 10 years ago I had some extended periods of time not dressing, but not because I didn't want to. Now that I am the same age as Mary Morgan, I feel as she does: as I have gotten older it is harder to stop for any period of time. It is just too much a part of me.

[SweetPea_GG]

I think im just curious to get views from everyone else and what i could possibly expect.. and I know that its something only my husband can answer as to how often or if he will have or has had dry spells but I am sure he will read this post later tonight and maybe answer it too lol..i do know everyones different but just wanted to see how everyone else stood on this question.

[Being Paige]

I would say the only times that I don't dress is when I'm on vacation (camping) or on other vacations with the whole family (wife, Daughters) and or other family vacations
Vacations when I'm not going anywhere and no one else is on vacation with me I dress for the entire time

[Andrea Renea]

Dress about once a week. 53 years old. My wife has known for 15 years, married 30 yrs.
She is understanding of my need to do it . She knows I've done this since an early age.

There are times though I do not feel like dressing. Sometimes go for a few weeks.

I do go out dressed sometimes late at night or early in the morning to run small errands.

[t-girlxsophie]

Haven't reached that saturation point yet,Of course who knows what events may occur in the future to get in the way of my dressing.But for now I'm just going to enjoy it to the fullest

:hugs:Sophie

[Donnaph]

Under dresser here Sweet Pea, I tend to try and dress in a littel something everyday. Usually either panties or pantyhose. Sometimes stockings or thigh highs. But have gone for a month sometimes without dressing in anything.

[BRANDYJ]

Hi SweetPea, A really good question. As for me, I don't even understand why my dressing seems to be attached to how much I'm around the woman in my life. Right now I live with a female room mate that does not know about my dressing and most likely never will since she is just a roommate and not my SO. But for the most of 2 years I was living alone while my SO lives in Michigan. Now you'd think that with all that alone time I'd dress as much as I wanted to. But I am one of those that hates living alone. Add that to really missing the woman I love with all my heart, I just did not have that strong of a desire to dress. She is more that OK with my dressing and even enjoys my fem self around when she and I were living together here in Florida. In fact there were times that she would ask me to dress for the day to serve her as her maid. Those were the days I loved being a CD. It's one thing to have her total acceptance, support and understanding, but it was so special when it was her wanting me dressed for the day. So maybe it got like that old saying, "All dressed up and no place to go" without her around to participate. But when I think about it, for as long as I can remember, from my early twenties on, whenever I was not in a relationship and living alone, I still did not dress as much as when I was in a relationship and living with the lady of my life. Gee, maybe it's because any woman I live with gives of estrogen and makes me want to dress more. lol

[Christy_M]

I have gone years without dressing but still wanted to dress everyday. It is weird that Even though sometimes I don't dress, I still think about what I will wear the next time. BTW, light brown wool skirt, dark brown turtlenck sweater, calf high boots with dark brown tights...maybe tomorrow (or later today :) )

[Raychel]

For 10 years after we got married, I surpressed my dressing. There was time that I wanted to, but I did not.
I told my wife of my dressing over 5 years ago now. I really have not had a time yet that I did not want to dress. Sometime more then others, but I almost always would rather be in a dress.

Maybe if I actually had more time to dress, the feeling would subside a bit. But for now with the schedule I have and the little time that I do actuualy get to dress. I always have the desire to be dressed.

[SweetPea_GG]

Still all great responses and shows us just how unique all of us are no matter gender or living situation. Your post brandyJ made me smile when you mentioned how much you missed and loved your SO :)

This is kinda another question which maybe you all can help me with. I have a horrid time with heels.. well first off i feel awkward in them cause as a GG I am naturally tall.. 5'10 and my husabnd is 6' so when I wear anything that has height on it I end up taller then him. He has no issues with it.. im the one that does and it probably goes back to childhood and bening teased for being the tall girl in school.. being called ostrich or ppl laughing saing i could hang glide on a dorito etc.. kids can be mean.. i was always taller then the guys back then. Ive always loved heels and stuff but just way to self concious about my own self to wear them.. which leads me to my issue..

my feet kill me in them.. from the time i put them on just about.. do you all have any tips or tricks with them and wearing them. I know they are bound to hurt eventually but my pain is constant. just curious if there is something out there i dont know about or havnt tried.. thanks in advance :)

[Diane Smith]

I have had long cycles -- years sometimes -- of not dressing or doing it only very rarely in the past.

Nowadays, as Diane I have a bit of a social and business life of my own and therefore I am almost required to dress up at least once or twice a week when I am with people who only know that side of me. This has been good in a way, because it makes me dress regularly and avoids the huge emotional swings and the possible overdose of the dreaded pink fog when I start up again. I will admit that some days my enthusiasm for it is not as high as at other times, but once I get started with the clothes and makeup, my compulsion to do a good job with the illusion takes over and I do enjoy the process and results of transforming.

- Diane

[melissacd]

I have separated from my wife of 25 years in large measure due to cross dressing. Living on my own affords me the ability to just be myself and dress most of the time. As was said earlier in this thread I dress in ways that are appropriate for the task or event at hand. I go out in public femme much of the time and when I don't I still look pretty femme and get referred to in the feminine most of the time, makeup or not. I have not owned any male clothing for three years now and never plan to buy anymore. I find that with my all female wardrobe that I can easily swing from femme to metrosexual male as needs arise. It is the way that I feel most comfortable and I am pretty sure that my need to dress in female clothing 100% of the time will never go away. I have no desire to medically transition to become a female, I am just happy being a male always, in some way dressed as a female.

In terms of high heels, I find that using those gel inserts helps a great deal for longer wear and comfort.

Melissa

[BRANDYJ]

SweetPea, I am glad I made you smile. But I was simply stating the facts. She is my everything and more.

Now about your height and heels: I happen to like seeing tall women. I have no problem looking up into her eyes if I was with a taller woman. But then again, I like looking up to my SO anyway. In fact, I find it sexy and exciting to see a tall attractive woman. Those heels would just make yoiu look more confident or powerful as a woman. I say wear them. That is if you can find a pair that does not hurt your feet. Not knowing how tall of a heel you have worn, maybe try a pair that is a little lower. I know I can wear 2 inch heels all day without a problem. If I go to 3 inchs then they might hurt if I stand or walk to long in them. Go to 4 inches and I don't wan to be on my feel for long. I once had a pair of those fetish 6 inch heels. Trust me when I tell you, they are to wear laying down only! lol Zoie is confident in his male persona and has no problem with you being taller in heels. I think it's silly for a man to be uncomfortable around a woman taller then him. It's only those with weak egos that would not admire a taller woman at his side. OK, so that's my take on it. But I am one of those men that truly feels women are superior to men in many ways. They are the stronger sex. It's men and their silly egos that are weak, homophobic and shallow in my opinion. But that's another topic.
There is nothing on earth as beautiful as a woman. If taller, it's just more beauty to gaze at. Be proud of yourself and your height.

[SweetPea_GG]

You make a good point BrandyJ..Its that feeling for me as well to look up into my husbands eyes which I love.. given flat footed I am not that mujch shorter then him but when he hugs me it feels good at that level and not feel like I am a skyscraper lol.. he does love them and always wants me to wear them more and it makes me feel good that it doesnt bother him at all. See im not much into the shorter heels they have to atleast be 3+ inches.. cause thats what im attracted to most if i have to have heels.. although I love my ballet flats and can wear them with anything.. although its to cold now here and my feet freeze and they look silly with wool socks lmao!

[Davina-Alba]

Personally no, I have underdressed for well over 25 years and I don't own any male underwear. In some situations I may just wear panties which are not obviously female but that is as far as it goes. I would like to wear female outer clothes as and when I want but as I don't want to try and pass as female this is not easy.

[deebra]

Panties every day and love wearing them, drab most days but would dress fem every day if I could pass. It's hard to dress and go out and not wear the shoes and D-forms, but I would be outed and embarassed, it's sad that I can't.

[Rachel B42]

I underdress everyday and have for years, panties everyday other items depend on the occasion and if I'm going to be around buggers. Every now and then I dress more depending on how I feel, like today.

[Samantha B L]

I go for long periods of time without dressing but I used to stay dressed at my late SO's apartment for several days and I could see myself dressed 24/7 all the time IF there was time and a way!

[Kaz]

You make a good point BrandyJ..Its that feeling for me as well to look up into my husbands eyes which I love.. given flat footed I am not that mujch shorter then him but when he hugs me it feels good at that level and not feel like I am a skyscraper lol.. he does love them and always wants me to wear them more and it makes me feel good that it doesnt bother him at all. See im not much into the shorter heels they have to atleast be 3+ inches.. cause thats what im attracted to most if i have to have heels.. although I love my ballet flats and can wear them with anything.. although its to cold now here and my feet freeze and they look silly with wool socks lmao!

My wife is taller than me, but she has always hated heels. I love tall women, in heels or not! I love small women too, I just happened fall for a tall one!

I love heels and I find that I can cope with them well when I have been wearing them a lot! If I take a couple of weeks off dressing and don't wear them I am clumsy when I do wear them! So I think it is probably about constant usage and being adapted. Sometimes I have been able to walk for hours in my 4" heels, which work the best for me.. 5" is too high!... but other days (after a gap) it is a pain to walk 100 yards.

[VanessaVW]

Yes, there are times I don't bother with it. (maybe a day or two), but then I feel the need again. I'm sure the gg's also want to wear sweats and a hoodie on occasion too.

[SweetPea_GG]

I'm sure the gg's also want to wear sweats and a hoodie on occasion too.

yes that has been me for the past umm too many years lol..

[Davina-Alba]

Yes, there are times I don't bother with it. (maybe a day or two), but then I feel the need again. I'm sure the gg's also want to wear sweats and a hoodie on occasion too.

Yes, but I bet they don't want to wear crappy y-fronts or boxers under their sweats? And I bet they still wear their bra's.

[avalana]

where i live, the weather often dictates how i dress. but since all i have are girls underthings, does that count as getting dressed up? like it's going on -23 f now, so a skirt or dress is out. so are jeans. as far as the urge to go all out, that comes and goes but it seems the urge follows the moon phases-big girl moon and little girl moon.and theres always the mood thing.will try to pay more attention to that,to see if theres a pattern

[suchacutie]

As with everyone else, I most certainly dress in cycles. There are an infinite set of reasons for this, but the bottom line is that Tina is a part of my life, not my entire life. Tina has to be balanced against everything else. Sometimes Tina just happens, or my wife invites her for an evening, or I just "need" Tina and she appears. I really do have problems with the time factor since it does take an immense amount of time for Tina to transition. It would be nice for Tina to be here for a few days at a time, but that won't be happening for a while. It's just life's priorities.

As for the heels, I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. It turns out that heels appear to be a wonderful physical therapy for my back. I have some 4.5 inch clogs that I wear every morning before I put on my male clothes for work. That means I wear them at least an hour every day. In all my pairs of heels, I do have one that pinches my small toes in a way I can't seem to fix. Any little irregularities have been taken care of by keeping shoe trees in the heels. I wear heels for hours at a time and it really seems no worse than wearing any shoe. I will admit that when I get tired/forgetful and if I start walking in a more manly way, my legs start to get tired fast. There have been some threads here about walking in heels and they have some great tips! They might help!

For me, walking in heels feels like dancing...it is a whole body activity.

[Maria 60]

The summer time i dress less because i enjoy wearing shorts and sandals. As soon as fall hits and i see the woman on the streets wearing pantyhose again, it's every day. From October to April pantyhose are part of every day underdress cloth. Fully dressed i will dress once or twice a week when i can, but harder when the kids are off school.

[tracijae]

Sweetpea...you are the greatest!

[Annaliese2010]

I don't dress most of the time, don't think about it & don't care to. Got MUCH more important things to do... Sheesh!

Then again, I'm probly atypical of most ppl here so...my opinion won't help you gain insight cuz it's not a thing w/me - not a driving thing anyways. Whatever...

[SweetPea_GG]

Sweetpea...you are the greatest!

umm didnt expect that but thank you :)

[Carly D]

Currently I am in a lull of well over a year and a half.. Mostly a situation I can't control but also I am partially afraid of what would happen if I told.. I hate the idea of everyone being different around me after telling them about my Carly side.. The thought that they might think that I am now and have always been gay (which I'm not, but most people associate cross dressing with being gay which a very large percentage are not) or change the way they are around me.. I know my little brothers wife seems to be homophobic big time although if you were to ask her she would deny it.. I also like to have a secret life that no one knows about, I can't imagine what they would say now if they were to find out (although I think they might know).. It's the game I like.. whatever that means.. But to answer your question I have had many lulls, the latest being one of the longest, although earlier lulls would be completely without wearing at all... No shoes or anything else and no thought towards that either.. Sometimes in a lull I would see a woman dressed just right and BAMM head first into the deep end..

[t-girlxsophie]

dont mention high heels to my wife.last xmas she bought a gorgeous pair of 4" heels for her works night out.unfortunately she toppled over and knocked herself out.I went to casualty from my works night out and she came out 4hours later on crutches,first thing she did was heels straight in the bin,now the only heels over 2"high in our house belong to me.I dont mind as she is just the perfect height in flats for a really good cuddle:hugs:


:hugs:Sophie

[jamie-upstate]

i try to wear somthing every day somtime just a pair of panties or tights

[Cheryl James]

In response to your first question, no one but your husband (and he may not even know) what his needs and desires are in terms of when and how much he dresses. He is lucky, very lucky, to have a wife who, obviously, loves him and who wants to understand this pleasurable quirk. I am not that lucky so my dressing is sporadic as opportunity presents itself. I've gone years at a time without dressing due to career and children, but I wanted to dress every day of every one of those years. It's a lot of work, though. At this point in my life I dress as much as I can (it's not enough) and that can range from underdressing all the way to totally presenting as a woman and going out in public to shop. With your support your husband will find the proper level for himself and, hopefully a level that is acceptable to you, as well. Good luck to both of you.

[bridgetta]

Yup. Sometimes its strong. And other times not. Its fun tho.

[SweetPea_GG]

In response to your first question, no one but your husband (and he may not even know) what his needs and desires are in terms of when and how much he dresses. He is lucky, very lucky, to have a wife who, obviously, loves him and who wants to understand this pleasurable quirk. I am not that lucky so my dressing is sporadic as opportunity presents itself. I've gone years at a time without dressing due to career and children, but I wanted to dress every day of every one of those years. It's a lot of work, though. At this point in my life I dress as much as I can (it's not enough) and that can range from underdressing all the way to totally presenting as a woman and going out in public to shop. With your support your husband will find the proper level for himself and, hopefully a level that is acceptable to you, as well. Good luck to both of you.

thanks Cheryl The main question wasnt ment for my husband but I was just curious in general about everyone here and their situations :)

[Zoie]

Well I will answer this to my wife :)

I have gone through spells where I didnt dress at all or want too. It comes and goes like the flu I guess. Sometimes I can fix the need by just wearing a thong or stockings. Its not an everyday thing thats for sure as mentioned in a previous post dressing up is a hard job there is a ton of prep work and then if you add in makeup etc it can take hours then the result is you and you only have an hour of your day left alone before having to take it all off and go back to male mode. Is it worth it depends on the person I guess but we wouldn't do it if it wasn't on some level.

But yes sometimes partial dressing can cure the need easily. Other times its a need that can last awhile or not at all.

[Stephanie47]

The only time I never had an urge to dress en femme was while in the military. I did not have either an opportunity nor an inclination. Part of the time it was somewhat obvious to me. I was in training or Nam where there were no females in pretty clothes to kindle my desires. When I got married my wife was a pretty petite knockout. Being newly married I loved buying her or going together to buy sexy clothing for her to wear. Then the fires were rekindled from my student days. I am retired, so I have ample time to dress, but, sometimes I do not have time to indulge or I do not have privacy. During the summer I cannot dress, and, that causes a lot of frustration. Other than the summer I am able to dress for six to seven hours a day, and, if my spouse takes a trip, 24/7 for seven to ten days. That is heavenly. So, if I were now single I'd dress 24/7 with the exception of having to interact with the less enlightened members of society or family.

[sometimes_miss]

My crossdressing is stress related; basically it's under control, but it takes a certain degree of mental 'cpu cycles' to to that. When too much else is on my mind, say, whenever I'm going through any difficulty in life, the ability to suppress the desire to crossdress is more likely to wane, and I dress.
The longest I went without crossdressing was several years when I first dated, and got married. As the marriage went on the rocks, so did my ability to contain my crossdressing.

[LindaC]

Like lots of others who have responded, the urge comes and goes

I've gone long periods without dressing, like when I was in the Navy and it really didn't bother me but when I finally got out, the first chance I got , I was back at it.

Now retired, I can dress whenever I get the urge but it isn't that simple for me.

I'm currently dealing with some health issues and I'm not interested in sharing this part of my life with my Doc's. Among other things, I'm not shavingmy body and I'm keeping my hair short(I have anothar surgery next month and they are going to shave off a chunk of it anyway).

Sooner than later, I'll be done with the surgeries and I'll be able to be myself again.
For now, I dress now and then, but not doing the makeup thing or going nuts about it.

So at least for me, it's about priorities.

[linnea]

As an adulty, the only times that I didn't dress or want to dress en femme have been times when I simply couldn't for various reasons. Since I was in the closet most of my adult life, these times came up more frequently than I wanted. However, it seems to me that now, whenever I can dress enfemme, I do and am glad to have the opportunity. I underdress to some extent every day now. On weekends and weekday evenings at home, I always dress and feel no need to take time off. On these occasions, like many GGs, I don't always wear full make-up and jewelry; I just dress casually but in female attire.

[Leslie Langford]

...and just paraphrase comedian Chris Rock's famous quote that "a man is only as faithful as his opportunities", substituting the word "crossdresser" for "faithful". That's certainly true for many of us here, once the genie has been let out of the bottle.

But it is also safe to say that stress has a lot to do with it, and that our urges to dress up will often coincide with the amount of stress that we may be under at any given time. It is well known that there is a strong correlation between the two, but the good news is that unlike taking drugs, alcohol or binge eating for the same purpose, crossdressing in itself is not as self-destructive, nor is it fattening ;).

[Byanca]

Nail polish, mascara, fixing my har and something cute to wear. I'm pretty much addicted to all of that. And can't remember ever that I did not want to. However some practicality must be applied. Especially try to avoid severe freezing, as that's taking it too far imo. I'm not all that good at doing makeup. But a little does wonders. If anything, there are huge room for improvements. Not more(it's 27/6 already), but better.

[JamieG]

These days, I am able to go a few months without actually crossdressing, but not a day goes by where I don't think of it. The longest I've probably gone without was a couple of years, but now that I've accepted myself, I couldn't imagine waiting that long. Like many of the other ladies, my need to crossdress increases with the stress in my life, but it is not solely stress-induced. I have various triggers, such as seeing a woman in a pretty outfit or knowing of an upcoming costume party, that tend to peek my desire too.

[Naomi Rayne]

Still all great responses and shows us just how unique all of us are no matter gender or living situation. Your post brandyJ made me smile when you mentioned how much you missed and loved your SO :)

This is kinda another question which maybe you all can help me with. I have a horrid time with heels.. well first off i feel awkward in them cause as a GG I am naturally tall.. 5'10 and my husabnd is 6' so when I wear anything that has height on it I end up taller then him. He has no issues with it.. im the one that does and it probably goes back to childhood and bening teased for being the tall girl in school.. being called ostrich or ppl laughing saing i could hang glide on a dorito etc.. kids can be mean.. i was always taller then the guys back then. Ive always loved heels and stuff but just way to self concious about my own self to wear them.. which leads me to my issue..

my feet kill me in them.. from the time i put them on just about.. do you all have any tips or tricks with them and wearing them. I know they are bound to hurt eventually but my pain is constant. just curious if there is something out there i dont know about or havnt tried.. thanks in advance :)


First and foremost some heels may just cause u problems no matter what the height is because everyones feet are different so the first thing is finding a pair that is comfortable on your feet. I havent had the chance to wear heels long enough to know the extent of the pain they cause, but everyone says its kinda like riding a bike, gotta start somewhere small (training wheels). So get a couple pairs that are small, 2 or 3 inch heels, nothing crazy and wear them often to get used to how it feels, once ur finally comfortable with them and can walk in them without any problem you can move up to 3 1/2 in heels or 4 in heels, and then eventually 5 inch heels if you so choose, but each inch even tho small in measurement is alot more pressure on your feet and ankles so it takes time and practice to get used to. Gotta walk before you can run right? So thats my suggestion and something that i have picked up from many around this forum and i hope that the advice helps you. I personally dont think i see enough women in heels because they really make a womens legs look good. So i think its fantastic that your asking for advice and trying to broaden things :D

[Sarah Doepner]

I started dressing as a teen although I had the interest before then I didn't have the opportunity. The desire dropped off from my mid 20's until my early to mid 40's. I'd dress occasionally but it was very infrequent. When the mid 40's hit, so did a lot of other stresses including kids becoming more complicated, work more demanding and me having less control over my time. Crossdressing was a wonderful way to escape and relax. In my mid 50's my wife became aware of my dressing and has accepted this as part of what makes me who I am. Since then I've dressed much more frequently and enjoy it a lot. However there are still times when crossdressing doesn't fit our obligations or the opportunities are not there. But at those times I probably think about it more than when I can dress. It has grown as part of my life, both as a desire and as a satisfying activity.

Heels are wonderful if you find some that don't cramp your toes and put the pressure on the right part of your foot. Part of that may be the height of the heel. The higher the heel, the more likely it is that the weight of the foot is shifted farther forward to an area that can't support the weight. I have a few pairs of heels that are in the 3 1/2" range that are very comfortable and others much shorter that I've had to send to Good Will because they hurt. Finding a comfortable pair of heels is a rare and beautiful thing.

[Dana]

I like women ~ and I like feminine things~

Always have ~ always will!

My XHEX Chastity for such?

I'm mostly masculine in a 10X's why?

But I do admire and appreciate femininity!

The feminine form and femminity so to speak?

I envy women!

In such that they are not such the clothes the are culturally /socially are awarded to wear?

But the emotions, expressions, their thoughts ~ they can express!

OK~ The lingerie, panties, slips, dresses, makeup, the whole "getting girly" thing is a a lot of fun!

Shopping is a lot of fun!

Being a girl is lot of FUN!

[carhill2mn]

Hi SweetPea_GG. By now I am sure that you have come to realize that 1) there are many different answers to your questions; 2) we are quite thrilled that you are a member here. It is so encouraging to encounter SOs that actually try to understand this complex subject.

Each of us can only respond based upon our own experiences. When I was younger and had a family, career, house, etc. to take care of I would go for fairly long times without actually "dressing". However, the desire, thoughts, wishes were also there, just not the opportunities.

Now that I live alone I am en femme unless my male self is expected. Even though most of my immediate family "knows", I do not present myself as a woman to them.

[Lissa Stevens]

I am pretty much at least partly dressed every day. Have not taken time off from it since I accepted the fact That I am TG.

[randumbness]

I have come to my point in my crossdressing where it's all in or none at all. I feel that only half dressing and trying to present as a male doesn't work for me. If I half dress (like, wear a tanktop but have male sweats and a zip up hoodie on), I have to present as a female and make the attire look as feminine as possible. I can't half present anymore. I also like to fully present, so if I'm en femme, I'm en femme head to toe.

So of course there are times when I'm way too lazy to do it, or I'm not in the mood. I believe it's in the person dressing that feels the urge, and again, no one know's the trigger, but it happens in spurts, rather than as something continuous, save for maybe a few of us. At least, that's what I've observed.

[SweetPea_GG]

thanks for all the great replies everyone. I am glad I was able to come in here and ask a general question. I was actually quite a bit nervous about it in the first place :) But you all have made me feel right at home. As i knew there would be a large variety of answers and thats good to see too cause we all arnt cookie cutters thats for sure :)

[Jordan]

I dress most of the time just to what extent do I dress too is the question, I always have a pair of panties on wost of the time im in a bra with panthose and womans outer clothes (i.e. skiirts,pants, and blouses). I have to be alone or go out to put on the make-up and wig or to be able to wear shoes

[Rinoah06]

I only fully dress every now and then. But sometimes I want to do it everyday. I also get dry spells but I don't know if that is me avoiding my true self or i just dont think about it. With my life (military) I have to hide it most of the time. usually my mood is affected by "putting myself away" though.

[Kerigirl2009]

I would have to say for me I never really feel that I don't want to dress. However, I have gone months without getting completely dressed up. Most of the time I think this only makes me think about what I could be wearing more. To curb this feeling I find I always prefer to wear panties and ocassionally a bra or cami under my male clothes.
Now I have been on my dry spell since June 24th 2010 (only dressing twice since) But have not gone out. I have put on a skirt or two for a bit but I think I omly count complete dressing to include make-up and wig. I know I have the urge to dress up building However I have such a hard time communicating this desire to my wife. She knows but has never met my fem side. She is nice about it and I know she would prefer it would just go away. I know from living with this for most of my life that the desire to dress will not go away. only hibernate for a while. I wish you the best of luck and understanding.

[SamanthaS]

The times I don't want to dress are August and July in Vegas. Nothing like thousand degree weather to turn you off to makeup and pantyhose :)

[Miranda09]

This is a great thread SweetPea...thanks for asking the question. As for me, I do go thru periods where I don't feel like dressing at all, except for keeping my toe nails polished 24/7. I think that those times that I don't dress, it's my male side needing some freedom to express myself (if that makes any sense), but when I do dress, I usually keep it simple and don't even bother with makeup. I think if I were a GG, I would be the same way about the makeup end of it. BUT, if I really feel in the mood, and the camera is willing and waiting, I will get dressed to the hilt and snap away. Those are the special and fun times for Miranda!!! BTW...your SO is one lucky person. It's refreshing to see GG's with husbands or boyfriends who are willing to take the time to understand what we're all about, and there are many of you special ladies here. Happy holidays!!!! :)

[Joy3]

A simple answer is that yes I have gone weeks, months even years without dressing. It always comes back[pink fog].

[Crysten]

Funny - I usually underdress most of the time (90+ percent)...I only own two pairs of mens underwear, afterall, and probably 50 pairs of panties. But the urge to fully dress comes and goes. Why? No idea. I fully dress maybe once a month, if I get a chance. Sometimes more, sometimes less. And sometimes I go out...camoflaged? Womens jeans & athletic shoes (not very obvious), nylons, panties, bra, and very feminine top - with a mens North Face jacket on to cover up. No one has said or noticed a thing, as far as I can tell. And it's fun =). I feel like I'm on a secret mission into the "normal" world or something when the only article of mens clothing I have on is my jacket and no one says a thing. lol.

And thank you for supporting your husband. He's just trying to express himself, we can't all fit into society's little box. I hope you and he both get enjoyment out of it. Now you have both a husband and a new girlfriend!!! =)

[Davina-Alba]

It is over 25 years since I became an underdresser and I never have felt the urge to stop, even for a day. In some circumstances I'll tone things down and just wear fairly plain panties rather than stockings, suspenders, tights, corsets or whatever - but that's as far as it goes. See my signature.

[Charise52]

Dear SweetPea,

For me, there are no gaps at all... once I started wearing panties, there was no going back... form, fit and function was simply too good... once I discovered that camis were warmer than t-shirts, I never went back... once I discovered that women's jeans fit me better than mens jeans I never went back... all I wear now is camis and panties and jeans and tops (long sleeve or short sleve or sleeveless depending on the weather). In the summer I wear women's shorts and tops... I am so used to all this that I never think about it... it is just natural for me... I will never go back... my friends have never said anything, and my last two GG girlfriends were completely accepting...

[Janet Bern]

Hi SweetPea. I can usually go for a few months without dressing. I always get the craving from time to time. All the work that
you women go to to just leave the house is enough to make me glad I am male... After going out female, I need a rest.

[Cheryl T]

There are occasional times when I don't dress and I have no explanation as to why. As for duration...it varies and again, no explanation why. It is what it is....

[Joy3]

I have gone days, weeks, months and years without dressing. It always comes back[pink fog]!!

[lauraabdl]

I enjoy underdressing every day and fully dress several times a week and to the nines usally once a week when I make my excursins out, shopping, thrift stores, grocery store shopping, or just window shopping at the malls.

[cindym5_04]

I definitely go through spells where I have absolutely no desire to dress....but then I have spells where I feel a strong desire to dress, too.

[Maria_1969]

I am just about always in pantyhose every evening, but dressing beyond that can come and go.... Sometimes i have such a strong urge to wear a skirt and heels I have to or I am miserable. Pantyhose has nothign to do with my feminine side, I wear them no matter what mode I am in.

[littlemara]

Since I got laid off I'm dressed just about every single day since I'm at home all by myself all day :). However I would say that I don't have a "need" to dress, I just enjoy it and it makes me feel good so if I had to skip a day or two or ten I would be fine with that.