Transitioning

[Aprilrain]

What are you / did you do during transition? Work, school, volunteer,
I'm a commercial pilot but have not had a job as a pilot yet. I'd rather not transition in the relatively small world of aviation I would rather come back to it after every thing is more or less settled. In the meantime I'd like a fulfilling experience that would help me learn many of the skills of womanhood that I missed growing up as a, it's hard to even say, boy/man. Obviously making money would be helpful but I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to get a job until I can pass better.
Should I just get a measly job were I can transition in relative obscurity until it becomes too obvious? I.E what the hell is it a man or woman? Or what. I know it's my decision but would like to hear what did or did not work for you
Thanks
April

[Melody Moore]

Hi April.

I have been on Disability Support for quite sometime due to severe anxiety & depression and a number of other physiological health issues that were caused by that. However since starting my transitioning the anxiety & depression problems are abating so now as my health is improved I am keen to get back into the workforce & have recently become registered with an employment agency after having medical examinations & job assessment interviews. To help me on my path back into full-time work I decided that I would join the Queensland Association of Healthy Communities (http://www.qahc.org.au/) as a volunteer for a public education program into Supporting Transgender client. Part of my work is to write a bi-monthly editorial for the Culture Magazine. I have already been involved with QAHC for sometime now as a committee member of Out! Cairns, a subsidiary organisation of QAHC that organises parties & events to promote LGBTI education & awareness.

I went to the QAHC Christmas party last Friday night and was urged to also apply for a full-time position With QAHC as a Project officer for the Transgender program in our region. This is a position that pays a salary between $50,000 to $75,000 per annum. The job would be to conduct training seminars for Businesses, Schools, Universities Hospitals, Doctors etc. I cannot tell you how excited I am about the path that I chosen because I do derive a lot of personal satisfaction from helping others like us. To now have the opportunity to get full-time work in something I feel so passionate about is like a dream starting to come true and hopefully will soon be my everyday reality & way of life.

[Faith_G]

I kept my job.

[Aprilrain]

Thanks Melody and Faith.

Really no one else did anything while transitioning?

[StaceyJane]

I work as a civilian in an Army hospital lab. I have thought alot about what it would be like to transition on the job. Frankly, the idea is really scary but one day I might have to face up to it. I know in my heart that being a woman is right for me.
I have imagined running a lab in a gender clinic where I could wear a cute white nurses outfit to work. :)
Forget the scrubs I want to wear the white dress with white hose and shoes with a nurses hat to match.

[Nicole_P]

High School Teacher! :)

[Karen564]

I'm still in school for a career change in Healthcare... CMA & CBCS...for starters...:battingeyelashes:

[Jorja]

I transitioned during college which for me came after a stint in the U.S. Navy. I worked for several well known Architects before going out on my own. I now have a growing and somewhat sucessful Architectural Design and Construction company. My personal opinion is you should go do whatever it is that makes you want to get up and go to work in the morning. Are there going to be thoes who will ridicule you? Yes, more than likely there will. If you believe what you are doing by transitioning is the right thing for you then you can deal with the hecklers. No one said it would be an easy road to travel.

[Felicity71]

I work in a Coles Express (Shell) brand Service Station (Gas Station). Before starting HRT Id worked there for a few years. The business is only 1 km away from my house, and had a very good manager who was 100 % supportive.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Im a tradesman very much so. & have worked both as male & as a woman. in the sence of differences im a builder & joiner.tho i have done other trades. thats over 46 years . changeing on the job no difference i still deal with the same people & have the same acceptance then as now. & if i need to pull rank as a woman i can. im not a wimp, .

My back ground reflects who i am as a person first then as a woman & a trades man / woman. so its a no brainer. for me & no one else is bothered. its as we say work as normal.. tho i am now retired iv done my time.

...noeleena...

[tanyalynn51]

Im early in the process, so right now, Im working as a man, living as a woman, and wheras I used to never go out, I am going out more and more dressed a little at a time.

[Angel.Marie76]

April,
I have been transitioning 'in-place' with the rest of the world spinning around me. My friends, family, and employment have either already been exposed to my transition, or are scheduled to be. Except for my employer noted below, I've basically been informing people of the change in appropriate ways, with warning here and there, meetings, and just friendly communication. As of this moment I have not had any flat-out distaste, but with my RLE beginning, I'm sure that could change.

I informed my office one year ago that I was planning to transition on the job. I talked with HR, they acknowledged, and we moved on. Six months later I found out they hired a diversity trainer/consultant, and had been consulting with him for planning my 'big switcheroo'. Just this month they completed the two days worth of hour-long classes for all the employees, with a special longer session for managers. (He called it Transgender 101 - and he himself was a Transman, someone I know from the community) They've been keeping in touch with me as needed, making sure I was content with the climate, and confirming my deadline for Full Time status (And, realistically, the start of my RLE) for New Years 2011.

I have six days of work now left till I go on vacation for a week and a half while they complete all the administrative changeovers and execute an announcement to all the staff declaring that 'he' will be going on permanent vacation, and that 'she' will be returning in his place. Keep in mind with all of this as of November I completed my legal name change, and as of now I am almost completely converted over, save for my passport, birth certificate, and a few gender markers that I can't control right now. I feel confident that my manager, of whom I hold in high regard, is not winding up the axe to swing at me, especially considering the amount of money invested in the training and prep. This WILL happen, and I AM as ready as I'm going to be. (Hell, if I didn't do this now, I'd have some 'splainin to do in a few more weeks / months as the girls are well on their way out of an A-cup now..)

So, there's my story and I'm stickin toit.

[Hope]

Well... I was a Pastor, but for a lot of non-transition (and the obvious transition) related reasons I am happily leaving that part of my life behind. Right now I am working at the cosmetics counter at Macy's... which may lead me to be the first girl who goes "full time" at work before other places. Still working on that. After transition... I don't know. I LOVE working at Macy's, but realistically they don't pay enough to do the gig forever. I assume that after a few years at Macy's and after transition is complete, I will have a better idea about what I want. If you had asked me 2 years ago about where I would be today - it would not have included transition and Macy's.

[Rianna Humble]

I decided to transition on the job. It took a bit of planning but it worked out for the best. I should note that I have not yet been to the Gender Identity Clinic, so am still at a very early stage of my transition, but I am now referred to in my true gender.

Unlike many, I did not take a holiday - we used a month end as the cut-over point and management and relevant staff were briefed in time. On 1st July, I came into the office as Rianna and haven't looked back. Although this worked for me, I know that others have done things differently and with at least the same degree of success.

I would definitely not recommend going through transition without some kind of regular job - quite apart from the cost, you need to get used to living and working in your true gender.

Neither would I recommend the method of telling those around you that was forced on me when my story featured on pages 1 to 5 of my local paper and in a couple of national tabloid sleaze-ball papers.

[arbon]

I'm planning to transition on the job and my employer knows this, as do most of my co-workers (probably all of them do actually). I think I am safe from being let go because I am transitioning but the company is in such a bad state I do worry about it going under. That worries me as I don't see getting new job while transitioning as an easy thing at all to do (heck just getting a job regardless these days is not easy for anyone). Crossing my fingers that that does not happen, if it does I'm not sure what I will do.

[Veronica_Jean]

April,

I transitioned on the job. I work as a software developer for a company that is a military contractor. I work on an Air Force base as my saily place of working among the government customer and contractors from other companies.

I am pre-op but living full time since the end of June this year. At this point is has worked out amazingly well with no issues that I can tell at all. dI did work with my immediate supervisor and company for about a year before going full time.

Veronica

[meri]

April,
Have you considered not transitioning, rather, simply aspire to be yourself fully in the body you were given? If you want to wear a skirt, wear a skirt, if you want to wear a dress, wear the dress. Do so standing tall and with dignity.

I for one, have identify internally as female and I have delved into this issue from a number of different directions and always come back to the same identity - F. Thus, I accept myself as I am. However, I have interests in clothing that are not the usual for a male and interest in activities that are not typical for a male. I wear the clothing I like when the opportunity arises and participate in the activities that I prefer.

While I have a strong desire to look like a pretty female, I know it can never be so. Thus, I choose to live my life out as a male, but on my own terms. I do have clients, so I play the male role around my clients. I save the skirts and such for parties and friends who have already figured out that I am a little off-beat.

I am married and enjoy my marriage and my wife. She has also made it clear that she doesn't want to be married to a female. I get that and respect it. She does allow me some latitude and I appreciate that. Thus, I am walking on a fine line, but balancing myself between both worlds.

If I lived in a world where I could snap my fingers and instantly become a beautiful, young girl (25 or so) -and- society (including my wife) was enlightened to such a degree that they wouldn't care one way or another how I appeared to them, I would snap my fingers right now.

I can't snap my fingers and make it all happen, it is time consuming, expensive and painful. Further, I know I would end up without my wife and probably most of my friends and clients for that matter.

It's simply not worth it, not here, not now. Perhaps another lifetime -- of course, if there is another lifetime, hopefully I have the sense to align my body with my internal gender ID!

[Hope]

I think I am safe from being let go because I am transitioning but the company is in such a bad state I do worry about it going under. That worries me as I don't see getting new job while transitioning as an easy thing at all to do (heck just getting a job regardless these days is not easy for anyone). Crossing my fingers that that does not happen, if it does I'm not sure what I will do.

It is a reasonable concern. Of course I have no idea what company you work for, or even what sector of the marketplace your employer competes in - but this economy is harsh. You are absolutely correct in thinking that finding a new gig is tough - transition or not. But my experience so far has been, that the only gigs I have had call-backs or interviews for have been the gigs where I identified myself as transgender in my cover letter. Perhaps it is just curiosity, perhaps it is a desire to fill a quota, but my experience to date has been that getting a gig as a trans girl has not been any worse than getting a gig as a strait guy. Of course, I am also looking for work in one of the most progressive cities in the country - which helps a LOT.

[CharleneT]

I have kept a small business during transition, my clients have been mostly very cooperative. I was very careful in how I told them, that's a long story. I have also (due to slow biz) had to get a second job. I've done that twice now, both were after starting to life full time. So I was just me, which did not cause probs at first job. That surprised me, the company is known to be a bit homophobic, I figured they'd be transphobic too. My new part time job is at a large hospital and so far no problems, just work :) Everything else in my life I just continued as I had before. I do whatever I used to do. Any social activities, political groups etc... just the same. Not saying it has been easy all the time, but it has worked out.

[Stephanie Anne]

I am transitioning on the job and have no issues. Granted I have a large customer base that corresponds via phone and email and I am not going to declare my transition to them. There is no real reason to let people who do business with us remotely know something that is personal.

I also say I am transitioning around the city I live. Everywhere I go that I went presenting as male has o problem at all so for the most part, this is a non issue.

[Chickhe]

What about finding a job that complements your goal? Then you can gain experience that will help you become a better pilot. Or, just go get your pilot career started and use the support of the laws and company policies to support your transition. From what I hear, it might be harder to find a new job as a transgendered individual than it is to keep your current one (at least legally, it is easier to prove you were discriminated against if you have a positive track record at work).

[CharleneT]

What about finding a job that complements your goal? Then you can gain experience that will help you become a better pilot. Or, just go get your pilot career started and use the support of the laws and company policies to support your transition. From what I hear, it might be harder to find a new job as a transgendered individual than it is to keep your current one (at least legally, it is easier to prove you were discriminated against if you have a positive track record at work).

I disagree a bit . . . I think if you transition in a way that allows you to be generally accepted and blending in pretty well, then you will not find too much trouble in getting hired (other than the sh@#ty economy we are in). In my experiences, and a few I've heard about, in place transitions are harder by far - many more issues for your co-workers. On the flip side, the HR dept can be quite helpful. Still ... you're going to make all around you flip their own concept of gender.

[Aprilrain]

Thanks everyone. I don't currently have a job so keeping the one I have is impossible. It would be hard to get a job anywhere in aviation right now due to the sh$&y economy, as Charlene so eloquently put it. As for laws and HR departments, I had to laugh, obviously you guys haven't been to your local flight school which is the only place I'd be qualified to get a job right now. These places are usually quite small, no need for HR, and nobody has to hire anybody they don't want to. No law against that. If I had an established carreer I'd definitely stay and deal with it but I don't so...
Anyway I still have some school left, will finish that in male mode. If I go back for a 4 year I would switch campuses and genders. I'm considering beauty school mostly to learn quickly a lot of what I don't know about makeup and hair not to mention the all female interaction, I love having girl friends instead of a girlfriend! Lots to think about, thanks again

[renee k]

What about finding a job that complements your goal? Then you can gain experience that will help you become a better pilot. Or, just go get your pilot career started and use the support of the laws and company policies to support your transition. From what I hear, it might be harder to find a new job as a transgendered individual than it is to keep your current one (at least legally, it is easier to prove you were discriminated against if you have a positive track record at work).

Hi Chickhe,

What you have suggested is all well and good as far as transitioning on job as a pilot. And yes you are protected by laws. But in the real world and I speak from 40 years of experience. It can be a very hard and cruel world being locked up in a small cockpit with a homophobic redneck. Or taking a simulator checkride with a like minded individual. I know people have transitioned in this career and my hat's off to them. But in the confines of avaition. I think I would look elsewhere. Just my two cents.

Renee

[Victoria Anne]

It was for me an easy choice once the ladies and gentlemen here got me to examine what I wanted in my life . I contacted HR and informed them I was going to transition in 2 weeks and on that day I came into work and "he" was gone forever . I have never looked back and life is only getting better as my confidence is growing .