As Christmas gets closer peopls seem to be getting meaner

[Michelle James]

Went shopping today en femme as usual and I had run ins with two dofferent people. First I was using the self check out at Meijer's and as soon as I swiped my card this female bit%$ grabbed my receipt and my bags and threw them in my cart. Before I could react she was already scanning her stuff. Talk about agressive behavior. Rather than have a scene I just left. Second I went out to the parking lot to my POS van put my stuff in jumped in the drivers seat and before I could even start it the jerko%% waiting for the space was shaking his head and saying "C'mon you stuoid fat fu$%ing bit$%." (I read lips) I backed out and as i passed him he flipped me off. What the he%%.

One thing I know, had I not been in fem mode I would have lit both of these idiots up. Apparently Michelle is more forgiving.

Has anyone else notice this about their other self?

[eluuzion]

As a general rule, I try not to argue with idiots. While I certainly do not let any person "push me around" verbally or physically, I have expanded the boundries of what I am willing to tolerate from others over the last couple of years.

My reasons are that the economy is creating a whole new generation of unstable people out there. Even those people who never imagined facing a job loss or a financial crisis, are now negotiating that devastation. Egos are fragile and frustration is a dangerous bed partner.

Many folks out there are one bad experience away from totally snapping out. Whoever is in front of them at the point when they "snap" is going to incur the full wrath of a person trying to "avenge" all of the perceived "injustices" they feel they have suffered lately, in one fatal frenzy of insane behavior. The victim could be "you".

I am well trained to protect myself, but nobody is safe when it comes to "insanity of the moment". I am more concerned than I have ever been about personal safety issues these days. (and I am in the "business").

Now is not the time to "flip off" anybody or accept any "challenges" from lunatics. Many of those folks have the potential to pull a gun and shoot you in a "road rage" instant. Sad, but true.

Patience is a virtue these days...the goal is to get home safely...you only have to deal with them for 10 seconds...they have to live with themselves forever...

:love:

[LitaKelley]

Fem or drab, the woman in the checkout would of gotten an earful of expletives.. As for the jerk in the car, well.. he would of had to wait a long time as I sat there smoking a butt and warming up the car for 10m.. and if he flipped me off, well, I'd break his finger off then shove a 4" heel up his ass

[Alice Torn]

And, all of this is supposedly to celebrate Jesus' birth, which was in the autumn, anyway! If i were God, I would not like what is going on down here, in His name, when it brings so much megapressure on hurting people, to spend and go deeper in debt, buying spoiled people junk they don't need, while homeless animal, and folks suffer in the cold! Just my honest opinion.

[kathtx]

One thing I know, had I not been in fem mode I would have lit both of these idiots up. Apparently Michelle is more forgiving.

Good for Michelle and her forgiveness. No matter how much some jerk yells/gestures at you, the best response is to smile and walk away.

One time while on travel (in guy mode) I was in a convenience store to get a few things, kind of in a hurry to get where I was goind. There was a guy in front of me chewing out the clerk for not having his brand of cigarettes or something. After about 5 minutes of listening to this jerk yell at the poor kid, I spoke up and told him, very calmly, "sir, think about it. If this little thing is the worst thing that happens to you all day, then today will have been a pretty good day all things considered." He turned as if to yell at me, hesistated, thought for a few seconds, and cooled down. He thanked me, apologized to the clerk, and left. Think about what you can do with a kind word instead of a cutting remark, flipped bird, or worse yet, a fist.

[Melinda G]

Shotguns and canned goods folks! Things are going to get a lot worse. I've also noticed a lot of anger and rage out there.
One in nine homes is in foreclosure, and many more are one or two payments late. Many more people are in debt up to their eyeballs, at default interest rates. Not a pretty picture, and not looking much better in the near future. Be careful out there.

Now, were it me, I would have got back out of the van and walked back in the store and took a leak, before hitting the road home.

[Loni]

one good reason to not use the self checkouts.
and as for the guy wanting your parking space. O how easy it is for the car to breakdown.
i have learned how to be very polite to some..it just ticks them off so much there bp goes through the roof. and i get a laugh.
i do not know why but being very polite to some..just flips them out.

some years back i was waiting for traffic to clear so i could make a left turn, a car behind me started honking his horn..i set my brakes (air-brakes make a loud woush), and went back and (very polity) asked is something wrong..is something falling off my truck. his face went beet red he floored it in reverse and sideswiped a pole on the side of the rd.

sad. it never pays to be in a hurry.

.

[juno]

Instinctively, I agree with LitaKelley. But, the right thing to do is smile, and if they are trying to rush you, smile while taking your sweet time. If you get angry, they win. You also don't want their bad behavior to pay off. Mean people are used to aggressive responses. The friendly responses are actually more constructive, and you will feel better about yourself.

[Sophie86]

He turned as if to yell at me, hesistated, thought for a few seconds, and cooled down. He thanked me, apologized to the clerk, and left. Think about what you can do with a kind word instead of a cutting remark, flipped bird, or worse yet, a fist.

I agree. It's so much more gratifying to change the person's behavior rather than justifying it by being mean back to them.

[christine55]

Anymore I dread the Holidays. Where did all the good feelings of Christmas go?

Hugs, Christine

[Karren H]

I don't really think people are getting worse.... But then again if she had done that to me I would have kicked her ass right then and there... Then I would have side swiped the jerk waiting for your spot and taken him down a knotch!! Damn F..ing idiots!!!

[marny]

born mean. and any one who knows me knows it. not kidding.

[Marissa_Black]

I'd pay money to see you in action!!!

[Carol Elizabeth]

"As Christmas gets closer peopls seem to be getting meaner"

I agree, I about had my head bit off in the religious discussions forum for asking why people say Happy Holidays rather than Merry Christmas.

Oh well.

CE

[Marissa_Black]

Fem or drab, the woman in the checkout would of gotten an earful of expletives.. As for the jerk in the car, well.. he would of had to wait a long time as I sat there smoking a butt and warming up the car for 10m.. and if he flipped me off, well, I'd break his finger off then shove a 4" heel up his ass

I'd pay money to see you in action Lita!!!

[Michelle James]

I don't really think people are getting worse.... But then again if she had done that to me I would have kicked her ass right then and there... Then I would have side swiped the jerk waiting for your spot and taken him down a knotch!! Damn F..ing idiots!!!

Typical hockey player, aleays look'n for a fight! LOL

[Melinda G]

Some days I just don't even want to come out of the house.

[NathalieX66]

Typical hockey player, aleays look'n for a fight! LOL

yeah, when I see arrogant people, I like to piss them off even more....just for fun :kickbutt:......Kind of like Sean Avery of the New York Rangers, the second all-time greatest pest in the NHL behind Claude Lemieux.

[Jay Cee]

My gf and I joke about being getting all pi$$ed off about "1st world problems". We are usually referring to ourselves, but their are lots of other people out there getting all angry about what is really nothing. We live in the land of plenty, and if the worst problem someone faces in the day is waiting for a parking space, or the store not having their brand of cigs, then it is a pretty good day.

I do like the car "problem" solution to people impatiently waiting for a parking spot. :D

[Melinda G]

Then there's always the "geezer act". Sit there a few minutes adjusting the seat and the mirror. Sit down low in the seat, trying to see over the wheel. Slowly back part way out. Pull back in, co@k the wheel and slowly back out again, looking every which way, and acting confused. Just loads of fun. When they blow the horn, hit the brakes and look startled. :D:D:D

[Chickhe]

A good one for impatient parking spot wanters is to take some time inside, then get out open the trunk, put stuff in or take something out, then lock up and walk away from your car like you just parked. ...the second thing those people forget is you know where they parked their car after giving you the bird.

and its not Christmas exactly, I think there are just more people out shopping and people are getting impatient waiting in lines... one thing you can do is acknowledge them when they are waiting and look like you are trying to be quick.

[AlannahNorth]

Actually, they're not getting meaner. They're stressed, and what is coming out is their REAL nature. After all, the thin veneer of civilization can only suppress so much.

[Leslie Langford]

Typical hockey player, aleays look'n for a fight! LOL

Wasn't it Rodney Dangerfield who once said " I went to a fight, and a hockey game broke out" :eek::doh::heehee:

[Christy_M]

So many degrees of conflict resolution in this post. To the OP question, I know that Christy is much more docile than my male persona. Big, Burly, deep voice and very extroverted. People don't usually start anything with me like that. En femme, I am not puffing out my chest and walking around like I own the place. I really believe that people who present any degree of timidness will get some people's worst traits. I don't think it is a sign of weakness on the victim but more a sign of insecurity on the part of the aggressor and them needing to feel superior to someone else. As I have aged, I realize that as soon as you lose control of yourself in any situation, you have given others power over you to dial your emotions into a state that justifies their actions. You did the right thing by not responding. I applaud you for it. Aside from those aggressive hockey players, :) we are all better suited to take the high road and let the mental midgets deal with their insecurities with somewhere else.

Now, if you can't just leave it alone here are a few other tid bits that can start a brawl:

Rescan a few of your items on the self check out during that person's turn in line...she will have to get the attendant to take them off her bill. Certainly slows her down a little.
Take one or more of the items out of her cart and place them somewhere else on your way out of the store.
Put your fequent shopper number into the machine to get the credit for the purchase.

For the one fingered super hero in the parking lot:
Open the hood and the trunk and talk on the phone like you are waiting for AAA
I like the idea of putting your stuff in the trunk and going back into the store.
Tell them you are waiting for someone else to come out of the store until they drive off, then leave.

while it may be a better feeling to retaliate with these idiots, and the ease of finding things to get their goat is surprising, the true power over the situation is to smile and walk away. Karma will take care of them in some way. Just my opinion.

And I remember seeing Rodney Dangerfield in 86 and he did make that joke.

[Michelle 51]

All very interesting and good advice too but sometimes Michelle is in bitch mode before her brain kicks in.If we could only take the time to think before we respond to a situation how nice life would roll along.Somedays its hard to tick me off and the next i'm like throwing a match in high octane gas,Zero to bitch in 2 secs.This is also the worst time of year.Everybody is in high gear and left their brain at home.

[Karren H]

Typical hockey player, aleays look'n for a fight! LOL

I don't carry my hockey stick in my truck in case a game breaks out! Lol. Yesterday I was coming back from dropping the son of and I came withing an inch of getting side swiped on the interstate by a guy that was tail gating the guy that cut me off as I was getting off the exit! If I hadn't been late for work.........

[Julogden]

I don't go out in woman mode currently, but back when I did, I did notice that I was more likely to lay back.

Regarding the bad behavior during the time prior to Christmas, that's something I noticed quite a few years back. My theory is that people are rushing around buying things that they don't want to buy and probably can't afford simply because they feel that they have to do it or risk being a Scrooge, puts them in a very bad mood.

Here are a couple experiences of mine in man mode. Once, back when my kids were still little, I was in a Toys R Us store that was very crowded with a woman behind me who kept hitting my ankles with her cart, obviously peeved because the store was very crowded and she couldn't just rush through and buy what she wanted. She knew that she hit me, too, as I turned around and looked at her, got an angry look from her like she was daring me to say something. I finally moved over and let her past. She was nuts.

Another time, I was wating for traffic to clear so that I could make a left turn. The person in the car behind me was laying on their horn, but I had to wait to make my turn, as traffic was heavy. After making the turn, the person (turned out to be a woman) passed me, sounding her horn while doing so, and then flipped me the finger. She was yelling something too, very agitated, but since the windows were up, I couldn't hear what she was saying, which was probably a good thing.

Just recently, I've encountered very aggressive drivers whenever I go anywhere, way more than usual, and that's normal at this time of the year, at least around here. It always calms down after Christmas.

It's gotten to the point that I dread the approach of the Christmas season and breathe a sigh of relief when it's done, and I now try to minimize going out at this time of year. I give money or gift certificates for gifts, or if I need to buy a particular item, I buy it on-line.

Carol

[Ruth]

In one of my numerous psychology and people management seminars that I sat through in a previous existence, we were told "behavior breeds behavior". A simple, if slightly opaque statement.
We see it here in so many replies where people are suggesting that you respond to rude and obnoxious behavior with your own rude and obnoxious behavior.
Really girls, it's not rocket science. I don't suggest we all have to be doormats, but if it's possible to just walk away, then that's the best response, both for you and for the socially challenged person you just encountered.
I think it helps us that we are more inclined to be civilized and conciliatory when en femme. Well I am, anyway, darlings.

[Elizabeth Martin]

All very interesting and good advice too but sometimes Michelle is in bitch mode before her brain kicks in.If we could only take the time to think before we respond to a situation how nice life would roll along.Somedays its hard to tick me off and the next i'm like throwing a match in high octane gas,Zero to bitch in 2 secs.This is also the worst time of year.Everybody is in high gear and left their brain at home.

Thanks for the warning. :battingeyelashes:

[kristinacd55]

Happens every year! Being I was in retail starting in the beginning of November people would ramp up the meanness. I just started something new recently, and that's to park as FAR AWAY from the entrance that I can. Or, at least nowhere near the store I'm going to. The exercise is great, and absolutely no worries about getting into it with someone else over a stupid parking space.
:)

[suchacutie]

Stress. Stress. And more Stress.

There is ever less time, more things to get done, and ever more pressure to do them.

Many people just can't handle it.

As far as more forgiving, I'm not sure that Tina would take much of the kind of crap you received. She's very kind and forgiving, and she's never been in that position before, but I have this feeling that she won't be pushed around by anyone :)

tina

[kimmiegal]

.. and if he flipped me off, well, I'd break his finger off then shove a 4" heel up his ass[/QUOTE]
Love it.
Remind me to NEVER piss you off.