When you're NOT enfemme???????

[SometimesKathryn]

When youre not enfemme, are you an alpha male?

I am...........and, when enfemme I am not, what is it? Is it that when enfemme, I can let go of all of that "macho" demeanor? That as a male, I MUST be in control? I MUST be the strong one? Is it that I can let all of that go, and be the one who smiles at people? Is it that "personna" that we choose to escape from?


OMG..............my mind is working overtime here..........someone, please help me! :D

[Vikki Vixen]

I am a very confident male in my normal life but I would not describe myself as the average male as I like things that most men don't such as shopping and openly admit it. I get on very well with women and enjoy their company and they seem very comfortable with me and tell me things they wouldn't tell other men. I think this is down to only being raised by my mother so no male influence and the fact I talk about my wife all the time which makes GG's feel safe. They know I'm not trying to hit on them.
When I am dressed, which is only at home I retain a similar character in front of my wife who is the only one who knows.

[Karren H]

I don't change with my clothing!! I'm confident in my abilities... Forthright... Thrifty.... Brave.. Clean.. Irreverent. (What's the girl scout ones any way??)

[littlemara]

Yes I'm a very strong Alpha.

[prene]

I am a confident male also, but not a macho male, I do not watch football, baseball, or basketball. I go to the gym 4-5 days a week but most all my workout is cardio. I am not feminine but the avg person would tell that I was more sensitive than the nornal male. I have a lot of girl and guy friends but more girl friends.

[Maria_1969]

In my view, being male carries its own stresses and feeling or acting feminine for many simply releases that stress. No matter what stress my male side has, when I feel more fem and in my clothing, I am way more relaxed. It’s the main reason my SO likes my dressing; it makes for a calmer evening for her. Obviously we are all different in our level of feeling feminine, for example, I have no need or desire to change my voice or act any different, I am just a more laid back me, a man in female things feeling pretty.

My male side is very natural and confident, not macho or arrogant, but very masculine without being rude or obnoxious. However, I come across tough and intimidating when annoyed I am also the kind of guy that flirts and when single, can get many dates with women. I do not see that part as bad or something I need to escape from.
I think, for me, its escaping from always having to be strong, the protector, financially responsible and so on… However, you can bet, when I am in fem mode, in a split second if I need to be the man I am, I can do that even if the pantyhose are still on my legs.

Put it simply… for me, dressing is like going on vacation, it’s just a break from reality.

I am sure many different reasons will be mentioned as well…. I hope this helps.

[Christy_M]

I don't change with my clothing!! I'm confident in my abilities... Forthright... Thrifty.... Brave.. Clean.. Irreverent. (What's the girl scout ones any way??)

OK, that´s twice...I am not reading anymore of your posts in this meeting.

To the OP - I am alpha male in drab and I, too, want to escape this persona en femme. I feel as though that personality is a sham and only around for self preservation in order to exist in a man´s world. Feminine males don´t typically ascend other people´s business ranks although there may be some very successful feminine males, I don´t personally know any. I think this is one reason I have to act as a domineering male.

[Kate Simmons]

Alpha female male actually, which is why I more or less retired.:battingeyelashes::)

[Barbara Dugan]

Never been Alpha male or Macho ...I am basically the same person with diferent gender clothes

[ziggie]

To save the typing - reread Maria_1969. It pretty much summarizes my position.

[AllieSF]

I am the same no matter how I am dressed and I love it. I do think that dressing has liberated me more than when I was in an all male role.

[charlie]

I really think that I'm the same either dressed or as a male. I'm probably taken a bit more as a smart aleck when en fem, but the same person.

[DebsUK]

Definitely not. I'm the nice guy, probably coming across as a little effeminate. I don't feel I have to prove anything as a man or assert my masculinity. I like guy stuff like football and beer (real ale), but I love cooking and do aerobics in the gym, not weights (often the only guy in the class). I often sit with the girls in the coffee room at work.

(edited to correct a typo :S )

[Raychel]

I am not ever that real Macho Alpha male. I am pretty level headed, If I need to be that macho in your face guy, I can be. Although I don't really like to be that guy. Most of the time I am just me. And when I am dressed up.

Well then nothing really changes, except my clothes, Still just me.

[sissystephanie]

Neither Alpha or Macho, but not feminine either. I am just a man who likes to wear feminine clothing. That does not change who or what I am! I can still kick you name it if the need arises, but I can also be sweet and gentle!! I am ME!!

[LitaKelley]

It's F'd up... really.... When I'm not en femme.. I feel so agitated.. so tense and not right and I just CAN'T WAIT to go back to en femme, being my self.. DRIVES ME CRAZY... Only time I'm happy is when en femme... I changed... I didn't used to be like this.. Now it's all I think about. I'm not content in guy mode, nor happy.. really miserable.

[Kayla Shadows]

As men we are taught to be this figure and things are installed on how we should be. Sometimes its hard to just let go and be you. It was a real change to just think for myself. When Im not enfemme Im Kayla

[Cari]

A strange thought crossed my mind.
When dressed I'm a Tomboy and thats perfectly OK. Kinda a double std.

I was much more of an Alpha Male when I was younger.
I think time has mellowed me a bit or at least given me a much longer fuse.

When I was younger I think I engaged in allot of Alpha male activities to see how stacked up against other men or maybe to compensate.
Somewhere along the way I learned that just because I dress Im not less of a man, go figure.
I wish someone would have explained that to me before I got these scars on my knees , I could wear shorter skirts If I'd have known.

[Sheila11]

Confident, outgoing, never met a person I did not call friend. EN femme or not. I once told someone who only knew Sheila that they ought to meet my other half. He was the outgoing one. She simply said "Honey you can't be more outgoing than you already are." That was when I realised that I was essentially the same person.

[Enchanting]

In my daily walk in life I must maintain my male persona and am the alpha male. No question about it. For some reason, when enfemme, I am more relaxed and willing to let my hair down so to speak. It's not that I'm unhappy as a man, just more happy as a woman. I don't know, just feels comfortable.
-Daun (Enchanting)

[t-girlxsophie]

When Male I wouldnt say I am Macho.I play and watch Soccer,enjoy a pint,but I dont stroll about the place,thinking I'm the man,e.g. I m not into Male obsessive stuff like Motors and I'm useless at D.I.Y. Cant even change a plug LOL. I spend more time in the company of the girls,and we always talking girlie stuff and We talk about things that guys and girls wouldnt ordinarily discuss.A cpl of my GG friends have bared their souls to me.And I have to them also.

I would say in everyday life my feminine feelings are the ones I'm more comfortable with :hugs:Sophie

[Mackenzie]

I don't think that the clothes change me really. I do "feel" feminine in my Mackenzie mode, no doubt, but I am not a pusher, not trying to be a tough guy or anything like that. I am fun-loving, laugh a lot, have a zeal for life, love deep relationships with family and others, care for the needs of others and seek to do something about it, tender, etc. Machenzie is just a display of the feminine person inside that loves to come out.

I try not to over-analyze, because I can't really explain my enjoyment of dressing enfemme. It seems to be a very strong part of who I am. I have stopped/started so many times over the years and I think I have come to grips with the fact that I am Mackenzie and I am XXXXXX, in a sense.

Mackenzie

[noeleena]

Hi.

Wow how interesting .

I could not act the part of a male tho it is a part of me nor can i act a part of a woman & that to is a part of me really its about being in the middle & for this kid thinking as both. really just no difference , i never saw my self as one or the other . just a happy blend of both all mixed to gether. just i prefer womans clothes.

one word . ....HAPPY....just being me,

...noeleena...

[Jay Cee]

I'd say that I am fairly confident in male mode. Not so much an alpha male - more of a lone wolf. I can get along with guys at work, but have very few common interests with them, so I tend to be a loner.

I wouldn't sweat it, Kathryn. Part of being "Kathryn" is probably the escape from the pressures of being a top dog. Some choose alcohol or drugs for the release of tension. And some folks crossdress. No biggie.

[Kathy4la]

Non-Alpha male ... I don't hunt or fish or other macho stuff. But I love riding and working on motorcycles, my second hobby. I was raised around females and most of my adult friends are female. I am closer to my wife girlfriends that there husbands. It just seems I am more comfortable around woman then men. To me I don't have to prove anything around the ladies, just wish I could be honest and fit in with them. I admire them all !!!

[SometimesKathryn]

Its very interesting, this wide range of attitudes, reasons, individual personalities, and yet, here we all are with one thing in common.

To clear up the "alpha male" thing for me...........Ive mellowed in my old age.......and thus, Im not NEAR as intense as I used to be when I was younger. But, when something needs to happen, or someone needs to step forward and take charge of an issue............I'm definately capable if no one else will do it. When in drab, I still open doors for ladies in public, etc. En femme...........I love receiving the same treatment............go figure.

Thanks for chiming in ladies!

[Crysten]

Skiing in the Alps. Rock climbing in the UK. Surfing in Hawaii. Mountaineering in Alaska. Several weekends in Amsterdam. Face-down drunk in more countries than you can shake a stick at (I quit drinking btw). My wife tamed me. Mostly. My next trip may be to Nepal....if I can save up enough vacation time. Lol. But mostly, no, not any more. Unless my kids piss me off. lol.

[Lilaka Ananda]

I'm with Crysten. I ski off cliffs, mountain bike and road cycle 100 miles at a time. I enjoy firearms as a hobby. I've also surfed and rock climbed at times in my life. My new past-time is slacklining. Growing up as a small boy, I learned to be diplomatic and have big friends, which pretty much cleared my life of bullying. When writing in online forums on my favorite topic (the esoterica of eastern religion,) I've definitely been alpha. In life, I'll usually defer to anyone as a matter of course (and spiritual practice,) but that doesn't stop me from asserting myself verbally when it seems necessary.

[Samantha562]

Hi girl... well I am most of a transgender girl that I hope soon to become a 24/7 woman and a body that i am going to enjoy and wake up to every morning... A man doesnt have to like football basketball or soccer I am a woman insde and i still enjoy these sports.... and do things that a normal man does... even when i truely become a woman i consider doing what i do... my opinion is to do whatever makes u happy that day... :)

[JamieG]

I've never been very macho nor much of an alpha male. I'm more of a good-natured geek in male node. However, I am confident in my abilities, and am good at my job. The biggest difference I think is that as a guy, I tend to try to stay in the background, but as a girl I have no problem standing out more, both in the way I dress and the way I interact with others. I have noticed that I appear to be a bit ditsier en femme. And I'm not even a blond! :-)

[Janine cd]

I've always been a submissive person. I could be directed by either a male or a female.

[Teri Ray]

I am definately an Alpha in male mode. When dressed I am all girl.

[Fab Karen]

No. Regardless of appearance, I am ME. I have a brain, "alpha male" just isn't my nature.

[Robyn2006]

I'm anything but an alpha male, or macho in any way. I can only relate to women, the only real friends I have.

[docrobbysherry]

Never wanted to BE one, or be BOSSED by one! :Angry3:

I'm; independent, responsible, dependable, and old! Which means I'm a SUCCESSFUL male!:brolleyes: I'm SO PAST, "confident"!
As a male, I've pretty much, "been there done that"!

Sherry's the one I worry about! If she ever gets "confident" we may ALL be in deep yogurt!:eek:


Skiing in the Alps. Rock climbing in the UK. Surfing in Hawaii. Mountaineering in Alaska. Several weekends in Amsterdam. Face-down drunk in more countries than you can shake a stick at (I quit drinking btw). My wife tamed me. Mostly. My next trip may be to Nepal....if I can save up enough vacation time. Lol. But mostly, no, not any more. Unless my kids piss me off. lol.

You'll LOVE Nepal, Crysten! Beautiful, primitive, but friendly! MJ is legal there. There were plants growing wild next to our 4/5 star hotel!:heehee:

[Michaella]

No, I'm certainly not an alpha male. In all male company I'm very uncomfortable, don't really fit in. Not at all macho. Don't know what that means. From the range of responses it looks like there may not be any relationship between male personality and a desire to cross dress. Wish we could have a really valid survey on that.

Michaella

[GaleWarning]

At school, i was a follower.
Since leaving school, I have discovered that most people want to be led.
So I became a leader.
I take charge when others are running around like headless chickens, which happens way too often.
But I like treating women like ladies.

[Stephanie Anne]

If by en femme you mean with clothes on then I am either showering or sleeping. Technically I am still wearing clothes while sleeping but I don't count a t-shirt and pajamas dressing up.

Do alpha males bathe themselves? If so then can I be an alpha male? You know what, come to think of it, I am not really attracted to over achieving men. I wonder if it has something to my revulsion with overly secreted, super hairy guys with names like "the situation".

[Daintre]

When I was working, I was the manager of a lumber/hardware store. The position cried out for an alpha male and i did a great job of imitating one. I could control the rowdy warehouse staff, drive forklifts, speak contractor talk without blushing and be the guy in charge. It was an act, one I was very good at, am I an Alpha male?...heck no. I am the furthest from that guy. Now I am retired and I can be the person who I know I am. A confident, independent person who worries about her own life...I leave the company politics to the people still running in the rat race.

[TracyBoy]

I Have to be an alpha male during the day. I work in construction. (Hard on the nails!)LOL!

[Danielle Gee]

I am not ever that real Macho Alpha male. I am pretty level headed, If I need to be that macho in your face guy, I can be. Although I don't really like to be that guy. Most of the time I am just me. And when I am dressed up.

Well then nothing really changes, except my clothes, Still just me.



Ditto for me!!

[Rogina B]

As almost a lifelong commercial fisherman,as skipper and boat owner,worlwide,I was[am]always in charge of everything..lol[Think Deadliest Catch,Lobster Wars,Perfect Storm,etc] Anyway,I don't always go to sea anymore as I am busy doing repair projects for other boatowners.Being THE guy in charge of the "project" is probably my way to stay in charge of everything..lol. Roger has been "tested" so many times that very little can faze Rogina when out and about.So,I enjoy my girl time as I am quite tired of being the boy.