Blue just isn't my color and those burkas look really uncomfy

[SuzanneBender]

I am currently hanging out on the far side of the world. Needless to say a woman’s life in this land is far from that of a western woman. Freedom is limited, servitude is demanded and making a living as a single or widowed woman is almost impossible.

This caused me to question would I want to be a woman if I had to be a woman under the same circumstances. Obviously transition in the local society here is impossible, but I wonder how many males here would give up their status and freedom to be locked away in a life of servitude. Male privilege is alive and well in the western world and we give it all up when we transition, but it doesn't compare to what would be lost if you transitioned in this culture. Would you still wish to be a woman under these circumstances?

[Traci Elizabeth]

I think that in those countries it is even graver that you have indicated. Woman as less than human and are consider simply "property" like any other in many countries. Slavery, mental & physical abused is common place and justifiable killing of woman is more common that most realize.

Under those conditions, I would opt to leave that country and work my way to one that gave women human rights no-matter how far I would have to travel even if on foot.

[Stephanie Anne]

Are you describing Saudi Arabia or the U.S. 50 years ago? Can't really tell. If only Christine Jorgensen were alive today...

We have some hurdles here too. Health care still openly discriminates as well as some states arresting people for using "the wrong" bathroom and firing them for being trans. It's just a little safer to be in public here in some states. In others I respect trans women who do so there.

[Karen564]

I never wished to be a woman, it's just the way it had to be......if I had been born & lived there, I would feel the same as I do now & still have to transition regardless..
Transitioning for me wasn't about what rights/privilege I would gain or lose and I didn't do it for the glamour...I did it because this is who I am & always have been..This was NOT a choice...

[sandra-leigh]

Obviously transition in the local society here is impossible

I don't know which country you are in, and you possibly can't tell us.

In some Muslim countries, including Iran, transitioning is possible; in Iran it is even paid for by the state. This has to do with a specific incident in which Mohammad was approached by a transgendered person who begged for mercy, and Mohammad took pity on them and authorized transition.

On the other hand, homosexuality is still not permitted, and homosexual people may be offered the choice of transitioning or of severe alternatives (possibly including death -- which is, I gather, not an official punishment for homosexuality, but is sometimes metted out in the areas under more radical control.)

Cross-dressing is also not permitted, and may also lead to being offered the "choice" to transition.

[SuzanneBender]

I don't know which country you are in, and you possibly can't tell us.

In some Muslim countries, including Iran, transitioning is possible; I am in Afghanistan. I have traveled this part of the world extensively and you are correct. Islam looks upon the need to transistion as a call from God and it is supported in some countries. Given the cultural considerations here that is certainly not the case.


I never wished to be a woman, it's just the way it had to be......if I had been born & lived there, I would feel the same as I do now & still have to transition regardless.. Karen I agree. None of us asked for this blessing but we have been asked to carry it and we do everyday.

[christinek]

My desire to be female would not change no matter where I was born, However I imagine the outside stimuli would change the intensity of my being quiet or coming out! It took me 14 years to tell my wife, then a few more to talk about sex as a female. I cant believe where we are now, our relationship is so solid and unique. I would wear a burka if I was in that region as I am female. I do not believe in or agree with islam but girls clothes in any culture are still girls clothes.

[noeleena]

Hi.

We are who we are no matter how we view our selfs , so regardless of the county or where we live , many men will not accept that. they have had the control for far to long so its up to us to speak out & yes that means wether they like it or not we are here to stay. in our different ways of showing we can be accepted ,

women have been oppressed for 1000s of years like we have & its only in the last 30 years that our trans people have taken the step & said enough is enough ,

The surffragettes see what they did they grouped to gether & the men had to bow & they lost some of the control ,
Women can be counted as being of more worth than mere things,

Being on T V , papers & the net is one way iv shown people we can be accepted. we need a few more to do it . is 3 millon enough to start with , & stand in front of 100s of people & talk with them,

...noeleena...

[Rianna Humble]

I am currently hanging out on the far side of the world. Needless to say a woman’s life in this land is far from that of a western woman. Freedom is limited, servitude is demanded and making a living as a single or widowed woman is almost impossible.


I am in Afghanistan.

I will accede to your greater personal experience of the situation in Afghanistan but what you describe sounds like the taliban controlled parts of the country. What I have heard from women in other parts of that country suggests a different reality.


This caused me to question would I want to be a woman if I had to be a woman under the same circumstances.

I don't want to be a woman. I am transitioning because I am a woman with a birth defect (male body).

Islamic attitudes are no more defined by the behaviour of extremist terrorists in Afghanistan than Christian attitudes are by the extremist hate merchants in the backwoods of the USA. This is not a bash the country remark, merely a comment that fundamentalist hate merchants do not define the religion that their conduct defiles.

[Stephanie Anne]

Wait, you are comparing a free society to Afghanistan? You can't compare someplace like say Canada with a war torn, extremist controlled country mind fu&#ed by two super powers for 50 years. That's like comparing Martha Stewart with Courtney Love. You simply can't compare any country in conflict where liberties are abandoned. The closest country Afghanistan would be, if it would have never been ravaged and yet be Muslim, is Indonesia. Here is a sample of trans issues in Indonesia (http://www.thejakartapost.com/news/2009/05/28/indonesia’s-transgender-community-faces-discrimination.html) and perhaps what would be Afghanistan.

I wouldn't want to be a human being under those circumstances (Afghanistan).

[SuzanneBender]

Wow I didn't know I would cause such controversy with this post. I just wanted to share some of my experience here given what I thought would be a shared viewpoint on gender and ask your opinion. Let me further clarify.


Wait, you are comparing a free society to Afghanistan? You can't compare someplace like say Canada with a war torn, extremist controlled country mind fu&#ed by two super powers for 50 years. I wouldn't want to be a human being under those circumstances (Afghanistan). Stephanie my intent here is not to compare countries. My intent was primarily to point out the conditions that many of the women in Afghanistan find themselves in and make us realize how lucky we are to be women in our corner of the world. These conditions are not due to foriegn powers invading or Islam they are due to cultural norms that have existed here for thousands of years (Pashtun Wali) and they will likely remain. Rianna is correct. The conditions for some women in some parts of the country are significantly better. However, those living in primarily Pashtun areas (well over 60% of the country) find themselves in conditions that compare to no where else that I know of in the world. However, I am doing my best to help change those conditions even if it is for just a few individuals.


I don't want to be a woman. I am transitioning because I am a woman with a birth defect (male body). I applogize to all for using the word want in my initial question. None of us "want" to be we just are. We do get to decide if we transistion to correct the discrepancies we were born with. Even in our society some decide to transistion and some do not transistion depending on their circumstances. My intent in asking the question was to find out if you would be willing to transistion even under the extreme circumstances here in Afghanistan.

Again I didn't set out to hurt anyones feelings or get anyone riled up. I just wanted to share a really horrible situation and maybe make each of you feel lucky to be where you are in life and the world.

[Rianna Humble]

As I am quoted above, let me start by saying I took no offense at Suzanne's original post, neither did I intend to cause any.

I cannot truly imagine what life must be like for those in the backward areas of Afghanistan which are still influenced by the unislamic practices of the Taleban. All I can say to try to answer the clarified question is that I came to transition as an alternative to self-destruction. I hope that even in such an area I would not choose to take my own life.

[Aprilrain]

My own experience tells me that I would not transition in a place like Afghanistan. First I had to come to terms with being transgendered which took me 30+ years. Its probable I would not have had the opportunity to live that long in a place like that. In order for me to begin to come to terms with being TG I needed the Internet, without it I'd still be wondering what the hell was wrong with me and assuming I was the only person in the world who felt this way. I also needed the love and support of living breathing human beings which I get from my local support group. Also the work I've done with my therapist has been invaluable in coming to terms with being TG. I wouldn't trade being TG for all the opium in Afghanistan now but thats NOT were I was even a year ago. No, I'm like 99.9% sure that given the environment and the lack of available resources and support in Afghanistan I would have chosen death. Not by my own hand, why when their are so many other more convenient and "honorable" ways to die in a war zone. I'm sure given the level of angst that I'd been living with, especially these last 4 years or so, that I would have gladly volunteered to be at the front lines with my 40 year old AK47 wasting Russian and then American infidels had I been born in to that situation instead of the one I find myself in.