Lets try This again

[Sarah Glen]

The last thread I started resulted in somewhat hostile controversy. I am not about that at all and I apologize for the controversial subject matter.

Switching gears, here's a question I'm interested in hearing responses from...

What Are your experiences, past and/or present with your S/O's?

I'll share a tid bit of mine..

I Have been engaged to my S/O for almost 2 years now and we are set to me married this year. I came out to her about my dressing a few months back.

This was actually a funny story, In that she knew I had something serious to say and I could see in her face she was expecting the worse (cheating maybe), and when I told her that I like to dress, A look of relief came across her face, followed by the phrase, "Why would I give a **** about what you like to wear! Thats not even a big deal. Don't scare me like you actually had bad news to tell me!" I just smiled and said, "the world would be a better place if there were more people like you."

She Loves it when I dress, both sexually, and just for fun. I consider myself VERY lucky to have such a wonderful person to spend my life with.

[BethCD]

Sarah, Pretty much the same response from my wife 32 years ago. I gave her some hints prior to marriage, but "the talk" happened about a month into the marriage when she came home from work and I was dressed. She was quite accepting, said there are much worse thing I could be doing. Should have told her prior but that was pre internet and I thought I was the only CD on Earth.

Beth

[Salina]

I told me wife of 16 years before we were even engaged. She decided then that she loves me and wanted to stay with me. That doesn't mean she is supportive of it though. I would say she tolerates it, accepts that it is a part of who I am, and understands it is something I do. She has participated in it with me a handful of times over the years, but prefers to stay on the outside. Truthfully, I think she is more concerned about what people may think of her should it become public information. I have encouraged her to talk about it with a few of her openminded friends who wouldn't pass judgement, but as far as I know never has confided in anyone. Although I do wish she would allow Salina into her life I am ok with things the way they are. She accepts me for me and I accept her for her. I am lucky to be married to such a wonderful woman.

[Christy_M]

My first wife was accepting and participative. I told her two years into the marriage. We had other issues that drove us apart. My current wife knows but neither likes that her husband does this nor wants anything to do with Christy or that world I have created for myself.

[JulieC]

My wife replied very casually, and didn't mind it at all. I've never been married before her.

Of the various girlfriends I've had that knew I was a crossdresser (three, of several before them who did not know), two were very receptive and enjoyed it (though one of them not initially) and one mostly rejected it.

[JulieC]

My wife replied very casually, and didn't mind it at all. I've never been married before her.

Of the various girlfriends I've had that knew I was a crossdresser (three, of several before them who did not know), two were very receptive and enjoyed it (though one of them not initially) and one mostly rejected it.

[Karren H]

The past was great till she found out. Then it went downhill7... Present we are getting along as long as I keep it out of her face.... Future... Who knows. Could go either way.... More likely worse than better. Imho.

[Lorileah]

I don't remember a reaction at all, but maybe that is because she knew from the start I wasn't a routine person. It was probably, "so what?" or "that's nice" but truthfully I don't think I ever just stepped up and said "Guess what? I like women's clothes!" It was the 70's and most my clothes were androgynous anyway. I do remember her reaction to me doing the laundry though, it was "Don't ever do that again." Hey whites...reds...they should be able to get along

[AKAMichelle]

I told my wife 3 years ago and at first it was terrible. Eventually she came around and accepted me. She even went to a Halloween party with me dressed.

[KatieLynn]

I told my wife 3 months into our relationship. she thought she was okay with it and we got married, then after 4 years of marriage it became too much for her and we have now been separated since August.

[Angiemead12]

My last partner knew about it but wasnt to participative, My current partner now is extremely helpful but I had to work on it to get it to where it is now.

Currently she doesnt mind doing my makeup, nails and photos! And she always asks me when we are going out as girls for dinner and drinks! I cant say enough how lucky I am to have her.

[Cheryl James]

It was similar for me. My wife was overjoyed when she found out about me, so much so that she told me that I should NEVER even contemplate doing such a disgusting thing if I ever wanted to see my kids again. My kids and economics keep me here...for now. I have to pick my times carefully to dress,now.

[VS Fan]

Started seriously dressing about 10yrs into my marriage, and came clean about 2-3 yrs after that... pretty much a don't ask don't tell, relegated-to-the-basement type of activity, but she's not hostile about it, and understands when to look the other way when I do laundry etc. I hope for, but don't expect things will ever change to the more accepting end of the spectrum, but I'd say at least 50% of the problem being young kids who "don't need to know." I understand and agree with that of course, so it's not a point of contention, but I wish I didn't feel like I was "hiding" in the basement or "secluding myself" when the kids are in bed etc. Also, I LOVE sleeping dressed particularly with forms on and I have to imagine that would be a deal breaker, so there it is. Having said all that, she was pretty cool about the whole thing and still likes to joke about it with me from time to time, so at least I'm not "burdened" with the secret anymore...

VS Fan

[kathie225]

I can sympathize with many of you girls on this point. For my wife and I it was a tortuous struggle, but we finally have drawn boundaries through conduct that delineates her acceptability of my dressing. In her presence panties and pjs are ok. Beyond that it's splitsville. So far the boundaries as drawn have been acceptable to me as well.

[sarac]

The first time she knew was seeing me and didnt go so well. Of course I thought she was out of town and wasnt to be home for another week. I think probably I wanted her to find out but for sure that is the wrong way. For some time after was not good until more recently shes actually been out with me. I dont think it will last, I mean us but there are more issues i kina left out. Im new here and just trying to learn my way around in the forum. I would love to talk more as I start to feel more comfortable. I read almost everything you girls post and i feel it helps. Thanks everyone

[Maria 60]

When i got married i thought that was end of dressing.(Boy was i wrong) Started as a sexual thing, wearing pantyhose to bed. I wanted to take it further so i came clean to her. One night i sat her down and told her the history of Maria. She was not shocked but had a few questions, like do you want to be a girl, do you fantasize of being with a man. After answering all the questions no, she told me that she would support me as she was always a supportive wife.

[charlie]

Hello Sarah!
I told my wife of 10 years 2 years ago that I dressed. Nothing has been the same since. Tears, I'm told that I'm not normal, little sex and distrust and threats are now the norm. Getting trust and boundaries drawn is even a problem.

[sometimes_miss]

No positive experiences with any SO so far. After a messy divorce, I haven't really dated much anyway. No previous GF's had a positive response when I (carefully) brought up the subject of men in women's clothing.

[Alice B]

My wife was accepting from the start because I was totally honest with her. She did not want to see me dressed or participate, but it was OK to dress at home when she was at work. That was about 3 years ago. Now she is OK with my going out and occasionally dressing at home while she is here. I am totally shaved, wear ear rings and have my toe nails painted, wear nighties to bed and only woman's underwear. But, I work hard to be the same man she married, keep the communication open and let her know what I want to do or need. It keeps getting better, but I'm sure there will be a bump in the road at some point.

[erickka]

My wife knew about the other me a few months before we married. She said she will always love me, but will always hate the other me, so it has been an out of sight, out of mind agreement for almost 30 years. Her only stipulation is no full body shaving, and I can most certainly live with that.

[suchacutie]

My wife and I discovered Tina together, so Tina is a completely joint effort. The bottom line is that my wife and I are both fascinated that Tina exists at all! For us it is an adventure to find out who this feminine creature is, how she might have been a part of life in the past, how she affects our life in the future now that we know she exists, and what kind of existence Tina herself will have as we let her blossum!

[Laura Evans]

I told my present gf a few months into our dating when it appeared to be getting more serious. I invited her to a bar at a local restaurant with a message that I wanted to tell her something. After telling her about Laura she let out a sigh of relief telling me she thought I was about to tell her our relationship was over. She has been more than accepting of Laura supporting her completely even attending many support group meetings. It is so nice to have that support and love.

[stephi]

Told my wife about 12 years ago, she was very accepting after the initial shock as I hadnt given any clues away at all but knew I loved her and couldnt keep a double life from her. It was funny though during one of my two purges, she was more upset then me as we have many a girly night in and felt a good friend had passed away almost. LOL. She can talk very openly and we go into territory I guess would be out of bounds otherwise, she can relax and chill out better with Stephi. Needless to say Stephi big part of our life and to show she meant it she even got a small tatoo lover heart with my name. Yep lucky indeed.
:)

[MichelleP]

I was up front with my wife from the begining (even before we were married). She knew about my childhood and my inclinations about gender. I thought I had the best of both worlds. Unfortunately, she enjoyed my "dressing up" only for the sexual fun. As the marriage progressed she began to realize that "dressing" was much more for me than just the clothes and play time. In fairness I progressed too; from the sexy costumes, the big hair (hey it was the 80's) - to jeans, skirts, casual tops, sandals etc. I wanted to be and dress passably, to go out as Michelle and further explore, but she was morbidly affraid of being seen with me. She complained about wanting a "manly man" which became worse as time went on. Everything I did became a source of irritation, the subject of debate and a source of suspicion. Still, I wanted to be a dutiful husband, try to make things work, try to keep my feminine side in check. I went to counseling - she didn't because "she didn't need it". Uggghhh. One day, after 15 years, she abruptly left. I came home to find all her clothes and personal effects gone. All she said was "I don't love you anymore". I moved all my femme things in from the foot lockers in the garage to her side of the closet. My first time going out in public fully en femme was a month later on New Year's Eve - I felt very liberated and very alone.