Do you feel you can't connect with women when in drab?

[DebsUK]

A couple of threads recently made me think how sometimes I can't connect with women (GGs I mean) the way I'd really like to. For example, tonight I was doing a careers event with a woman from work and she was wearing this gorgeous charcoal pinafore dress with a striped blouse underneath and these fabulous knee-high boots and I really wanted to tell her I thought her outfit was lovely. In fact, what I really wanted to say was to ask her where it was from. But because I was in male mode I didn't, mainly because I worry that women think I'm being a perv and hitting on them if I say complimentary things about their outfits. Does anyone else find this very irritating?

[pattyv]

I do. The number of times I just wanted to compliment women on their outfits, and did not as I felt I might be read or they might get the wrong impression.

[Eryn]

Yes I do! In my work environment a male complementing a woman on her clothes or appearance can be interpreted as sexual harassment. :eek:

Even in non-work situation I cannot discuss these things like that in the depth I would like.

[Karinsamatha]

Yup. especially at work.

[msniki48]

Aside from the work place, I find i fit right in with the girls in conversation....it is when the girls are with their guys [ couples], that i feel i must restrain myself and spend more time with the guys for fear of comments....just an inner feeling that says you shouldnt be here. i don't always listen though....hehehehee

[suchacutie]

The one thing my wife and I determined about Tina was that her personality in me made it possible for me to connect with women professionally in a way most men can't, and that helped tremendously when I was an upper-level adminstrator and had a number of women working for me in adminsitrative positions. Most of my male colleagues didn't understand my philosophy about "handling" women in these positions, but they had to admit that, in the long run, it was incredibly successful.

Oh, about the clothes, it goes something like, "wow, I can tell my wife would really like that (fill in the name of the piece of clothing). Can you tell me where you purchased it?". It's a good ice breaker and it eliminates the awkwardness.

It seems that Tina was alive and well long before I understood about her!

[SweetPea_GG]

A couple of threads recently made me think how sometimes I can't connect with women (GGs I mean) the way I'd really like to. For example, tonight I was doing a careers event with a woman from work and she was wearing this gorgeous charcoal pinafore dress with a striped blouse underneath and these fabulous knee-high boots and I really wanted to tell her I thought her outfit was lovely. In fact, what I really wanted to say was to ask her where it was from. But because I was in male mode I didn't, mainly because I worry that women think I'm being a perv and hitting on them if I say complimentary things about their outfits. Does anyone else find this very irritating?

my opinion as a GG.. You should of atleast told her that you liked her outfit.. no matter male/female we like to hear thoes things and I know i myself enver take it the wrong way.. its nice to know that someone else notices.. especially the opposite sex.

**oh look its my 200th post!** lol

[Kathi Lake]

I connect just fine in guy mode, but they seem a lot friendlier in girl mode, to me. For instance, in the airport for my flight home, I spotted a trio of ladies who were, I'm sure, models returning from booth duty at CES. One of them was wearing The. Cutest. Boots. Ever! I, on autopilot, went over and complimented her on them, and asked where she got them. She actually took one off, against my protesting, and found out where (Forever 21). So see, it's not that hard. You just have to be a big boy and talk to them. Now, if you were to say, "Wow, your boobs look much bigger in that sweater" or something like that, it might not be seen as a compliment.

:)

Kathi

[juligirl1984]

oh gosh yes! It is an every day struggle with me. It's like I have to "act" when I'm in drab, it gets to be very lame honestly.

[sissystephanie]

I have never in my life had a problem connecting with women! Now that I am a widower, there are times when I think I connect too well!! I am not sure why, but maybe it is because I am both a good listener, and a good talker!! Women do tend to like men who can do both, and unfortuantely many men cannot do both!

[Fab Karen]

Clothes or hairstyle, etc.- just give the compliment if you feel it, most women like to hear it.

[erickka]

Oh yes! It is so sad that it has come to the point that everyone is so thin skinned, and the ACLU has way overrun it's bounds over the last couple of decades, that anything you say or do can land you in a total heap of $#!+ . I remember back in the 60's that my dad, grandpa, and many other men folk in my life would compliment women and they were met with a sincere thank you and sometimes a smile and a blush!

[Sarasometimes]

Quite the contrary. I have found that if you, as recommended, compliment their clothes they are almost always receptive. The other day in a quick mart, a women had the cutest hairstyle, so I as passed her I simply said, Wow, I like your hair. She just thanked me and we went on our respective ways. The thing with work is legit but just be professional and brief. The best part is when they give you a big smile like the young teller in the bank diid when I told her I liked her earrings. If anything, being Sara has helped me in this regard.

[Jean Ann S]

well to me women are somewhat more receptive to me or perhaps in a different way when in drab
They seem to accept me as "One of the girls" or perhaps "Harmless" when in girl mode
Or perhaps see me at least as a guy trying to understand ?

Jean Ann

[Gina X]

I have never in my life had a problem connecting with women! Now that I am a widower, there are times when I think I connect too well!! I am not sure why, but maybe it is because I am both a good listener, and a good talker!! Women do tend to like men who can do both, and unfortuantely many men cannot do both!

I'm also a widower but the problem I get now is connecting too well, I was at a party at Christmas en homme and there was a GG there who to me looked fabulous in a stripey knitted dress and black tights great makeup etc etc and I was very jealous because I wanted to look just like her but couldn't ask her about it because her SO alpha male was sitting next to me!! and he would just not understand