Got my letter

[Aprilrain]

Got my letter for hormones today which was expected but still exciting. Now all I have to do is wait, how long I do not know but probably about three months before I can see the Endo

[Jessinthesprings]

Congrats. Why are you waiting? What took me so long was finding a doc... then it turned out he did not even care for a letter. LOL at least I have the peace of mind of following the steps lol!

[StaceyJane]

Hey, that's great!

[gretchen2]

How exciting, congratulations.

[arbon]

Great news!! :-)

[Katesback]

Thinking I would be doing my homework (all that you could ever need to know is on the internet published by doctors) printing it off and going to ANY doctor (as a girl VERY VERY important) and getting the hormones. The tests that an endo does can likewise be done by any doctor and your printed out homework can guide him/her as to what tests to do if that is a desire.

[April]

I'm really happy for you, congratulations!

[Rianna Humble]

Got my letter for hormones today which was expected but still exciting.

Woohoo! :cheer::yrtw: Time to :Party2:


Now all I have to do is wait, how long I do not know but probably about three months before I can see the Endo

Boo Hiss! Don't like long waits :sad:

[Laura_Stephens]

Congrats!

[christinek]

Thinking I would be doing my homework (all that you could ever need to know is on the internet published by doctors) printing it off and going to ANY doctor (as a girl VERY VERY important) and getting the hormones. The tests that an endo does can likewise be done by any doctor and your printed out homework can guide him/her as to what tests to do if that is a desire.

Why do you say going dressed is important?

[StaceyJane]

Why do you say going dressed is important?
Kate's right. The doctor does not have to prescribe hormones and presenting as a female from the beginning is a good way to show you are serious about it.
I had my first appointment for HRT last week and I wore a very nice female outfit. I also had to check in at the front of a large medical office and wait in a waiting room with many other patients.
Since I feel very comfortable going out en femme it wasn't a problem.
It would seem hard to tell a doctor that you are planning on living full time as a woman while dressed as a man.

[ReneeT]

Congratulations! This is the next step of the rest of your life!

I agree with the comments on attending your MD visits presenting in your desired gender. My therapist and endo only know me as Renee and only en femme. I do think it shows commitment

[Jessinthesprings]

Why do you say going dressed is important?

The real question is: why wouldn't you? I'm sorry, but you should not take hormones unless you plan to go full time and if you can't even go to the doctor as the woman you wish to be you are not ready, and HRT is not a game. Your doctor will likely see it that way too. Just my 2 cents anyway.

[Traci Elizabeth]

You go girl! Congrats!

[JohnH]

Why do you say going dressed is important?

My two cents worth - why would you want to present yourself as a man when you want to become as a woman?

Johanna

[Aprilrain]

Thanks everyone for your kind words of encouragement. No need to worry, April certainly won't be dragging any man around to the doctor. Yuck!

[christinek]

My two cents worth - why would you want to present yourself as a man when you want to become as a woman?

Johanna

Well to you and those above, until you take HRT most of us look ridiculous dressed. We look like a halloween party is in town. I want to take the HRT to NOT look ridiculous! I don't have a problem out of town dressed, I just don't care. I think a respectable doctor would understand your goal and as you progressed see you then coming in dressed as things start looking more realistic. Also what about those who would have to leave work to see the doc, you going to work looking like that?

[Michelle I]

On my first visit to my therapist I went as Mike, I was not sure where I was coming from and where I was going with other emotional problems. Since then she has seen Michelle on all visits except one (work kept me late, almost missed the appointment). We communicate much better as a girl and a want to be girl. My first visit to the Endo doctor was also as a male, I was scared not only going to a new doctor. I was scared of how I presented, I was scare that I would offend someone. I have spoken with my therapist and she is in agreement that I go as Michelle, she said it will show my commitment and will let the doctor see how I present

[JohnH]

christinek,

If your avatar is any guide, you don't look ridiculous in your feminine presentation. Your face looks smooth as it is.

Johanna

[StaceyJane]

Well to you and those above, until you take HRT most of us look ridiculous dressed. We look like a halloween party is in town. I want to take the HRT to NOT look ridiculous! I don't have a problem out of town dressed, I just don't care. I think a respectable doctor would understand your goal and as you progressed see you then coming in dressed as things start looking more realistic. Also what about those who would have to leave work to see the doc, you going to work looking like that?

You're right work is an issue and I understand the problem of coming from work to an appointment.

The real problem I see is that you don't seem to understand what HRT does. It won't change the structure of your face or your body. It also won't help with makeup or your choice in clothes. Without Facial Feminization Surgery you will stil look pretty much the same after some time on HRT. I think you have self confidence issues that you can work on in therapy. You need to feel comfortable with yourself as a female before you start HRT.

[Teri Jean]

Congrts April.

[renee k]

Congrats April. That's a significant step forward. I also think it's important to present to your doctors as your preferred gender. I've been going to my therapist as Renee from the very first appointment. I agree with everyone else that it shows you are serious about the changes you want to make.Today, I received a copy of the referal letter my therapist sent to the endocrinologist I will seeing next Tuesday. I intend to go to endo appointment in my preferred gender. After all it's who I am.

Renee

I

[Hope]

Kate's right. The doctor does not have to prescribe hormones and presenting as a female from the beginning is a good way to show you are serious about it.
I had my first appointment for HRT last week and I wore a very nice female outfit. I also had to check in at the front of a large medical office and wait in a waiting room with many other patients.
Since I feel very comfortable going out en femme it wasn't a problem.
It would seem hard to tell a doctor that you are planning on living full time as a woman while dressed as a man.

My therapist and I would like to respectfully disagree.

According to my therapist, about 98% of her clients do not begin to present as female, in any serious way, before they start taking hormones. Sure, hormones are serious and not toys to be played with, but to suggest that anyone who doesn't go galavanting about as a guy in a dress for some undetermined period of time isn't serious, is at least as bad as the WPATH SOC in terms of gate-keepier-ie-ish-ness.

I think a letter from a therapist saying "this person is serious, responsible, able to make rational decisions for herself, and an appropriate candidate for hormones" is a much better indicator of seriousness than is a pair of heels and make-up. Karren Hutton looks WAY better than I do in a dress, but that doesn't make her more serious about transition. Rue Paul is completely comfortable in a dress, yet that does indicate that she is serious about transition.

Perhaps the right path FOR YOU was to get all dolled up before seeking hormones. That is cool. I can respect that. But I would appreciate it if you would be a little more willing to recognize that such is not the right path for everyone else, and that alternative paths are equally valid.

[Bree-asaurus]

I'm going to have to disagree with the people saying you shouldn't do hormones until you go 24/7 or that you aren't serious if you can't go to the doctor dressed.

I'm not going to rehash why here as my opinion on this subject can be found in many of my posts as well as in plenty of other people's posts in these forums.

We've spent our entire lives being told what we can't do, and surprise, we still get that ignorant attitude from some people in here. Find out what path is right for you, not someone else. Just make sure you are ready for each step you take.

[StaceyJane]

According to my therapist, about 98% of her clients do not begin to present as female, in any serious way, before they start taking hormones. Sure, hormones are serious and not toys to be played with, but to suggest that anyone who doesn't go galavanting about as a guy in a dress for some undetermined period of time isn't serious, is at least as bad as the WPATH SOC in terms of gate-keepier-ie-ish-ness.

.


I'm sorry but that's just crazy. Are you saying that out of 100 clients that only two are presenting as a female on a regular basis before starting hormones.
That would the the exact opposite of a gate-keeper.

[anonymousinmaryland]

Dear Freezing Butt in Ohio: Congrats and best wishes.

[Melody Moore]

According to my therapist, about 98% of her clients do not begin to present as female, in any serious way, before they start taking hormones.
I also think this figure is exaggerated because just from reading this forum you can tell that many of us to go to our first appointments dressed in our chosen gender & not dressed as our birth gender. I had been living full-time as a female as part of my own real life test for about a month before my first appointment. I had 2 appointments with 2 different doctors while presenting as a female before I was prescribed hormone therapy. Both doctors made comments about how feminine I was & how well I passed. I also believe that more people can pass a lot better if they take time to work on their personal grooming & female mannerisms prior to coming out.

But I do agree with Hope in that there is no set path to take, we are all different and some of us
will take longer than others to feminise & to come out. So there is no right or wrong way here to go.
You just have to choose the path that is right for you and that you feel the most comfortable with.

[TerryTerri]

Experiences vary, obviously. But, I have been on HRT for about 2 years now. I have never gone en femme to my doctor's or my therapist's appointments. And, I have not had any suggestions, raised eyebrows, or any other questions about that. I don't see any reasons to have an expectation that you should be en femme for your endo appointment. Go as you want to is my thoughts.

[Aprilrain]

gate-keepier-ie-ish-ness.



I'm trying to figure out how you got this past spell check!

[Aprilrain]

I have been on HRT for about 2 years now

This is a serious question, don't you have breast by now? if so how do you hide them while in male mode, especially in the hot climate you live in? I know some men have "man boobs" but they are usually (always?) fat, you don't look fat.

[Rianna Humble]

until you take HRT most of us look ridiculous dressed. We look like a halloween party is in town. I want to take the HRT to NOT look ridiculous!

For anyone with self-image problems, I can understand how it would be difficult to go to your early appointments dressed to your true gender. I believe that this too is a part of learning to accept yourself. Since the doctor's visit is to help you become who you really are, why should (s)he not accept you being dressed?

In my case, if I had waited to look pretty before starting my RLE, I would still be waiting in 150 years from now. Many people who have seen the comparative photos of me that appeared in the press tell me that I look better as a woman, some have even told me that I look pretty but they were being kind.

When I went to my first appointment with my GP to get the ball rolling, I presented as the man she was expecting to see. That is the last time that anyone in the medical profession saw me in drab. My only visit to the psychiatrist was dressed as the woman I know myself to be, and from her letter I believe that helped with her diagnosis. I now couldn't go dressed as a man even if I wanted to (which I would not) since I don't own any men's clothing.


I think a respectable doctor would understand your goal and as you progressed see you then coming in dressed as things start looking more realistic. Also what about those who would have to leave work to see the doc, you going to work looking like that?

If you feel uncomfortable going for an initial appointment dressed as your true self, then I will not tell you that you must, but I do think that this is something you should try to address.

I never change my clothes to visit a doctor, whatever I am wearing for work that day is what I wear to the appointment whether that is a dress, skirt & top, Salwar Kameez or whatever.

[Melody Moore]

Well to you and those above, until you take HRT most of us look ridiculous dressed. We look like a halloween party is in town. I want to take the HRT to NOT look ridiculous!
Did you know that there are many drag queens & transvestites that pass very well without ever having taken hormones?
And when you see these guys before they dress you would have absolutely no idea as males that they could pass so well
as a female? I know it's very possible because I am one of those people who can pass as a female without being on HRT.

I passed as a female for over a month before I started on hormone therapy so either I am very lucky or I did something right. I really don't think I am that lucky & I was one ugly m*th**f**ker as a guy, but that is just my own opinion of course & remember we are our own worst critics. So I put down my ability to pass well because I took the time to feminise myself as much as possible through personal grooming & learning about female deportment & speech. So just maybe if those people with your types of concerns about presenting as a female stopped trying to judge & compare themselves to others & just took the time to try a different approach, then they too might be presenting as a female at their first appointments. HRT only goes a very limited way towards helping you feminise, but the greater part of feminisation requires other things apart from taking a bit of medication.

I didn't have this unrealistic fantasy that by taking a magic pink pill it would turn me into a girl & I would start to look pretty. I went into this on the total understanding that I might not get the physiological results I was looking for, if this is what I was expecting from HRT. I went on hormones to see how it would impact on my psychology & the way I felt about myself - So I did it for my peace of mind & sense of sanity. And I believe that I got that because the male part that was in constant conflict with the female part of my brain has disappeared completely. The thought of wearing male clothes again totally disgusts me, so like Rianna, I couldn't go to an appointment as a guy even if I wanted to because I don't own any male clothes anymore.


Kate's right. The doctor does not have to prescribe hormones and presenting as a female from the beginning is a good way to show you are serious about it.
I had my first appointment for HRT last week and I wore a very nice female outfit. I also had to check in at the front of a large medical office and wait in a waiting room with many other patients.
Since I feel very comfortable going out en femme it wasn't a problem.
It would seem hard to tell a doctor that you are planning on living full time as a woman while dressed as a man.
I think Stacy is right on the money here actually. You talk to anyone who has done this.... if you go into your appointment dressed as a female and being completely comfortable in your own skin, showing that you are affirmed in your decisions, And have no illusions about what HRT will really do for you while being totally aware of the risks, then a doctor will usually have no issues about prescribing hormones.

I will admit that when I started living fulltime, I didnt throw my male clothes out straight away, however over the next few weeks I started to get rid of what I could by giving most of it to my male friends & charities. I hung on to a couple of items as a 'just in case' type 'security blanket' if I felt that I had to wear them. However after hormones got rid of that male side of psychology that was in constant conflict with my female side, then the decision to get rid of my last remaining male clothing was very easy... I took one look at them and said to myself 'No way am I ever wearing those clothes again' and they went straight in the bin. So for me from this point forward I know that there is no turning back on the best decision I made in my life.

As I said earlier there is no right or wrong path to choose, each one of us is different, some are stronger, while others are still fearful. So we must choose a pathat that suits us. When some of you go to see therapist & haven't worked out what you really want, your pyschologist might have doubts about recommending you for HRT if you seem to cling on to male part of yourself. I know this to be the case because my psychologist & I talked about this last week. I asked her why I could get approved sooner for SRS faster than my friend who has been on HRT for 18 months but she only went full time 6 months ago. I only have to wait 12 months from September 2010 because I was already full-time, comfortable in my gender role & legally had changed my name. So the sooner you can let go of the male side & feel comfortable in a new gender role, then the sooner they will feel better about recommending you for this type of a journey. I personally believe that before you start taking hormones you should really be aware of the risks & what to expect from HRT and be sure about your decision because some of the effects are totally irreversible and shouldn't ever be taken lightly. If you understand all of this then then fine, the choice is yours, but if you still have doubts then I really do urge lots of caution about starting HRT.

[TerryTerri]

This is a serious question, don't you have breast by now? if so how do you hide them while in male mode, especially in the hot climate you live in? I know some men have "man boobs" but they are usually (always?) fat, you don't look fat.

It's actually not too hard. I got the classic male beer gut thingy (even though I don't drink) and 1. the tummy sort of hides the breasts. 2. Wear baggy shirts &/or shirts with 2 breast pockets and stick something like a playing card in each. 3. Due to a late start of hormones and genetics, my girls just aren't that big. Probably just a bit big for an A cup. And, my estrogen regime is on a lower dosage level since I'm not 'officially' in a transistion mode. My medication regime is based upon addressing the mental and emotional aspects, as opposed to the physical aspects.
However, I couldn't go in public without a shirt.

[Maryanne_sa]

Congratulation! Isn't it great! I am also being prescribed hormones - after my appointment with the Gender Clinic on the 2nd February, just passed. In my case, I was told it would take three weeks, so I guess that's not too bad. I am soooo excited about this, so I know exactly how you feel.

In my case, I started full time in October last year, so about 5 months before starting hormones, but then I had been dressing and passing comfortably for years before that, so I was really ready for it. So, I think the whole issue depends are where you are on your journey, and what is right for you. We are all different. I also personally wanted to be full time before starting hormones, but then, thats just me, and what I felt was right for me.
Here in the UK, the Clinic wanted a pay slip from me with my female name, to prove that I was full time, so I think they do want to make sure that you are serious about it.

Maryanne