Anger

[JessicaD]

Well things have been pretty crazy here, im looking for some help or direction to help. Im genetically male, my wife knows i crossdress and we have went out together as so. It has been a long while since i have done anything. and over that period of time my anger towards life and her has gotten worse and worse. We just had a baby December 22nd of 2010. My anger just seems to get worse as the days go by. Im starting to think i need to see a therapist but im not sure if it would help. Can anyone give in insight or share a similiar story that may aid me in my path to overcoming this anger. please i need help.

[Teri Jean]

By all means, please get help for yourself. Your family needs you.

[suzy1]

You have started a family. So your wife and child come first. Do what you have to do! Get a hold on yourself, go see your doctor, get help. Something sounds wrong. You have responsibilities now. You have to be strong and be there for them.

I wish you all the best, SUZY

[Stephanie Anne]

i need to see a therapist.

Yes you do and yes it will help.

[Persephone]

It is very possible to have strange feelings surrounding the birth of a baby. It is important to seek assistance from a therapist. If you broke your leg, you wouldn't wonder if you should go to a doctor; you would go as quickly as possible. Why not do the same for your feelings?

Hugs,
Persephone.

[MarinaKirax]

Well, what are you angry about? Is it a fairness issue? Do you feel that you are underappreciated? Are you frustrated at other peoples lack of understanding, or intelligence? Is your anger directed at one person, one issue, or life in general? Thats probably the first thing to ask yourself, in order to seek help from the right quarter. And it would help us to find the right story to help you with. MK

[Jessinthesprings]

This is not a healthy anger. I feel you need to find an outlet. What it is for you I cannot say. Therapist is an obvious suggestion, but you should at the very least find yourself a support group, and perhaps someone you can confide in. One way or another get the help you need. It is possible all you may need is to go out and express youself.

Grats on the new baby. They are such rewarding work, but enjoy these days. I promise when she's 2 you will wish she was 6mo. old again!

[Melody Moore]

My anger just seems to get worse as the days go by. Im starting to think i need to see a therapist but im not sure if it would help. Can anyone give in insight or share a similiar story that may aid me in my path to overcoming this anger. please i need help.
First of all Jessica, noone here can help you, is all we can do is advise you. Not even a therapist can really help you, is all they can do is advise you as well. The only person who can help you is yourself and I believe you have just started to do that by seeking some advice.

Our stories are posted already in this forum, is all you have to do is look through this section and you will find them.

So I agree with what you said yourself, you need to find a good therapist and start talking to them and
they will help you to explore your options and give you the skills you need to help overcome these issues.

Good Luck :hugs:

[Schatten Lupus]

Anger is such a negative emotion, and when it begins to consume you it becomes priority to find a way to relieve it. Yes you should definitely see a therapist.
If you don't mind me asking, what do you feel it is that you are angry over? Do you feel it over you having not expressed yourself in sometime, or do you feel there is a chance that you are experiencing baby blues? (Yes, men can get it too)
But if not for yours sake then for at least for your child's sake do seek therapy, and get help trying to figure out the problem so it can be resolved now before it escalates and blows up and you do something you will regret.

[Aprilrain]

I can only assume that you feel the anger is because of your gender issues. As others have said by all means go see a therapist, get one versed in gender issues.
I was angry for years in my marriage and blamed those around me. I was constantly sneaking off to CD and was hiding it from my wife even though she knew, stupid! I would fight the urge the for days with denial and suppression, then I would just lose it over some inconsequential transgression, real or imagined. Usually I would storm out after a screaming match with my wife. I would get in my car and drive with no intentions of going to walmart to buy clothes but that's always were I ended up.
Then there was the envy. I'd see women and was so jelous of their looks, the easy way they all seemed to relate to one and other, their social position, the fact that they seemed to be able to cry when they felt hurt or sad.
I couldn't cry, if I was hurt or sad or mad or stressed it always came out as Pissed Off.
Hope this helps in some way, good luck and don't wait for the stress to get so bad that you feel totally out of control like I did.

[Charlena]

There are many paths in which suppressed anger can originate. The way that worked for myself about 15 years ago ( i had two teenagers then) it was not about them. I started going to a therapist and did not make alot of headway until I was HONEST with the therapist. It is hard work but that is what I did. Hope a Therapist is within your reach, nothing wrong with seeing a professional. but also don't think you have to stick with the first one you see. I found it helpful to start at the beginning. Be Well Jessica.

[Hope]

Well things have been pretty crazy here, im looking for some help or direction to help. Im genetically male, my wife knows i crossdress and we have went out together as so. It has been a long while since i have done anything. and over that period of time my anger towards life and her has gotten worse and worse. We just had a baby December 22nd of 2010. My anger just seems to get worse as the days go by. Im starting to think i need to see a therapist but im not sure if it would help. Can anyone give in insight or share a similiar story that may aid me in my path to overcoming this anger. please i need help.

Yes, you need to see a therapist. Gender issues aside, if you are harboring anger towards your partner and child, you need to see a therapist.

But be aware that a therapist has no magic potion that will make you a better, happier, more joy-filled person. Seeing a therapist is one of those situations where you get out of it what you put in to it. Your therapist cannot do the work for you, she is there to show you how to do the work only you can do, yourself.

There are two variables in a therapeutic relationship - one is the therapist and her skill, and the other is you and your willingness to do the work. Try to find a therapist with a Psy.D or a PhD who has experience with gender issues to give yourself the best shot at the first variable, and be willing to be brutally honest with yourself and admit ugly truths to minimize the second variable and you will be well on your way.

[Pythos]

You say you have anger, but what are you angry about? Or is this one of those general angers at everything that many in this world suffer? Your wife seems supportive, and now you have a child, so what is the deal?

Are you unemployed? Is your wife putting up unwanted and unneeded boundaries? Are you unable to be intimate with her due to the baby (I have heard this is a major factor in couples being unhappy, due to always having to deal with a crying child).

If you cannot pull back, and really look at things, then yes, a therapist is needed. You have a child in the mix, and lord knows this planet is not in need of one more messed up and hostile kid.

[Inna]

You are absolutely right to feel angry! It is your right, if you feel you have been tricked by life, you are right! If you feel you must do something about it, now its the time!
Even though others may say, it is your family, before you, they mean well but miss on the most important issue. If you are not whole than the family will suffer. Get help, get to therapy with gender specialty therapist. Read all you can, It is never too late to know your self!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Make today, the first step to real you and embrace the truth. Truth within your heart will set everyone free, weather dark days are ahead or calm waters, truth is the essence of life, embrace it! What lays ahead may be painful but believe me, I have lived comfortable lie for as long as I remember and one day I woke up and realized, I am dead! And since then, through pain and sorrow I have awaken and embrace my soul and truth within. There is nothing in this world more precious then love and truth, allow for love to do its magic! Love, Alexia.