Gyms

[TheresaJTS]

This is a question for anyone going through FTM transition. How do you handle
going to a gym? Do you present as male or female? Are there certain chains
that are more understanding to TGs?

[Katesback]

The gym was the one place that I did not go to when I was Pre-op. I did not have to wait that long before surgery and I simply went jogging outside instead of a gym.

My personal feelings are if you have surgery in your not too distant future then I suggest you not go to the gym (same suggestion applies to dating). Your pre-op days are your training days and you have a LOT to learn and going to the gym can wait.

Now if surgery is a long ways away.............. I cannot help ya and only wish you luck.

Katie

[Teri Jean]

Theresa,
I hope this will help as I am not an athletic person in that sense. A GF of mine keeps in shape for the slopes in the winter and the lakes in the summer so she goes to the gym everyday. She has been before she transitioned and has used the women's facilities from the start. In her facility they have family locker rooms which are much like your home; shower, stool, vanity, and benches. They can be locked for safety and privacy so until this last February she used this venue but since her GRS she has moved into the general locker room with the other ladies. Was it a bit strange at first, yes it was but that has passed. One thing you need to realize, she was known by most of the women there as a male just a couple years earlier.

I hope this will help but if there not the facilities there to do the same I would follow Kate's advice and wait. If that is not an option you may need to drive home and shower there. Sorry if this is not what you were looking for. Best of wishes.

[Christy_M]

While I may not be FtM, I do present as a "guy" in the gym periodically. For using the equipment, it isn't a big deal but if you plan to use the locker room I would suggest for your safety to use the one that matches your plumbing. I would be the last person to suggest that you stifle who you are but I think that there has to be a rational decision about what is safe and what is dangerous. For me, MtF, I will not walk into a country bar in the middle of the country (US)presenting as a woman for fear of getting hurt...same principal here. The testaterone in the locker room gets pretty high sometimes (I am ashamed to say) and it would not be wise to be there without the equipment like everyone else has.

[pamela_a]

I have 2 simple questions which I hate to ask but IMHO are key to the answer: How confident are you and well do you "pass"?

I'm pre-op and have been full time for 18 months. Some time before I was full time I went with my son to Lifetime to get him a membership (he wasn't old enough then to get one on his own). Several months after I'd completed my transition and had my name and gender marker changed I resolved to start working out. I returned to the Lifetime where my son had gotten his membership to speak to someone about being added to that account. By chance I ended up speaking with the same representative as I had with my son. He recognized my last name (it's very unique) and said he remembered my son but when my son signed up his Dad had been with him.
He took me on a tour of the facility and when we reached the locker rooms he showed me to the women's locker room and told me to go through, look around, then meet him on the other side. After the tour and we were completing the application I told him the account name would need to be changed to my name. He told me they would need "his" approval in order to do that. I told him it was ok to do that and that if he needed I had a document in my purse I could show him. At that he paused then told me he could change it. He added he didn't need the document, he remembered the tattoo on my arm.

Since then I've gone many times and have not had any problems. I change in the main women's locker room; many times with other women right next to me. Like the majority of the other women there I change modestly, making sure nothing below my waist is exposed. I've often stood in just my panties while I put on my bra with other women changing next to me and there has been no problem. Lifetime also has private changing areas in the locker rooms for those who desire more privacy while changing.

IMHO, no matter where you go, much of how you might are received will be based on how you are perceived and, of course, your identification. Mine identifies me as female and that is how I expect to be treated. I'm cognizant I need to be extra cautious as I change but at the same time I'm female, I belong there, and that is how I conduct myself, just like any other woman.

[Jessinthesprings]

This is a question for anyone going through FTM transition. How do you handle
going to a gym? Do you present as male or female? Are there certain chains
that are more understanding to TGs?

Actually I think this question is applicable to both sexes. I however do not have an answer for you, but I would think you should go as you feel comfortable. Possibly call ahead and talk to owner/manger to get an idea as to how well you will be recived. Obvously I think showers and lockerooms would be unwise while pre-op.

[Katesback]

I will chime in again because I just have that feeling here.

Ever see a crossdresser wearing a nice sexy outfit but looked out of place? Sure you have and ya know the reason they looked out of place is they did not learn/live HOW to wear those clothes. Same applies to teen girls who fight with thier parents to wear sexy clothing. Thier parents know they have not learned/lived HOW to wear thouse clothes.

Back to the gym question? Speaking in a general sense a PRE-OP girl has not learned enough to go to a gym. If you had to ask the question you have NO business being there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[pamela_a]

I will chime in again because I just have that feeling here.

Ever see a crossdresser wearing a nice sexy outfit but looked out of place? Sure you have and ya know the reason they looked out of place is they did not learn/live HOW to wear those clothes. Same applies to teen girls who fight with thier parents to wear sexy clothing. Thier parents know they have not learned/lived HOW to wear thouse clothes.
I agree Kate but I'd honestly be surprised to think a CD would be even contemplating anything like going to the gym cross dressed.


Back to the gym question? Speaking in a general sense a PRE-OP girl has not learned enough to go to a gym.
If I understand this statement correctly, you are saying there is something magical that happens during SRS that somehow gives you this enlightenment? I personally think this is a horrible premise. What you're saying is someone who has been full time for for a year or two doesn't know as much as one who was able to afford SRS after only 1 year being full time?
I would venture to say we both know post ops who would make other women in the locker room very uncomfortable due to either their appearance or demeanor. OK, so if a post op is questioned she can what, show them her vagina? Should someone question me they will get the same proof that every other woman should be required to provide, their legal identification which indicates their gender is Female. If they require anything else I can guarantee the next communication they receive would be from an attorney.


If you had to ask the question you have NO business being there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This I agree with completely.

[Katesback]

I agree Kate but I'd honestly be surprised to think a CD would be even contemplating anything like going to the gym cross dressed.

If I understand this statement correctly, you are saying there is something magical that happens during SRS that somehow gives you this enlightenment? I personally think this is a horrible premise. What you're saying is someone who has been full time for for a year or two doesn't know as much as one who was able to afford SRS after only 1 year being full time?
I would venture to say we both know post ops who would make other women in the locker room very uncomfortable due to either their appearance or demeanor. OK, so if a post op is questioned she can what, show them her vagina? Should someone question me they will get the same proof that every other woman should be required to provide, their legal identification which indicates their gender is Female. If they require anything else I can guarantee the next communication they receive would be from an attorney.


This I agree with completely.

Sure your are correct that there are some post op girls that have no business in a gym as well. As I said I was generalizing a pre-op situation. I was not addressing a post-op situation since that was not the question posed in the first place. I would say the same thing though for a post-op girl. If she has to ask the question she has no business being there.

[Stephanie Anne]

Well as for me, I am out of shape. I am not doing a smash up job of self motivation and I have my ID that affirms my gender. Therefore, a gym is necessary but will most likely have to be debated as I am knee deep in srs savings. Oh, did I mention I could give a fu*k if some soccer mom has a hissy fit that a trans woman invades her locker room?

[Christy_M]

Well as for me, I am out of shape. I am not doing a smash up job of self motivation and I have my ID that affirms my gender. Therefore, a gym is necessary but will most likely have to be debated as I am knee deep in srs savings. Oh, did I mention I could give a fu*k if some soccer mom has a hissy fit that a trans woman invades her locker room?

I agree on the soccer mom thing but I think the OP is FtM which makes it a little different in my opinion...Guys in a locker room could get "mob mentality."

[Persephone]

I agree Kate but I'd honestly be surprised to think a CD would be even contemplating anything like going to the gym cross dressed.

I hate to break it to you, Pamela, but I identify myself as a CD and I've been a member of a women's gym for 2-3 years now. I've also worked out in several affiliated women's gyms as I've travelled, and, when I was looking for a gym visited several others. I've never had a problem.

I usually choose not to use the changing rooms, but I have done so on rare occassions (I particularly remember the first time I did so, it was in London).

I completely agree with what I believe you and Katesback do agree on, and that is that it is definitely NOT something that someone who is not totally comfortable with their own skin and with their passing ability should ever think of doing. As Katesback wrote, "If she has to ask the question she has no business being there."

The OP's original post, however, concerned FtM's and that is an area I have no experience with and no judgement on.

[Deborah_UK]

I wonder if the OP would have been better asking this in the transmasculine section of the forum? Given that no transmen have (as yet) responded. Although (and I apologise if I'm wrong) but looking at the OPs other posts on the forum they appear to be MTF.

So assuming she got her FTM mixed up with MTF, I'll respond from my point of view. I'm a member of a gym, and am pre-op. I won't use the female changing facilities out of respect to the FABs there, I spoke to the manager and am using the family/disabled changing room which can be used a single changing area with storage lockers, shower etc.

[Stephanie Anne]

I agree on the soccer mom thing but I think the OP is FtM which makes it a little different in my opinion...Guys in a locker room could get "mob mentality."

That looks like a typo according to her post history. Most FTM do not post about short skirts and makeup tips.

[DeeDee1974]

I am a member of a gym. I always come from home dressed in my workout gear so I don't have to change there. I also joined the gym because I am close friends withone of the managers. I try to only workout during her scheduled hours or when my wife is in town and able to workout with me. Honestly, the gym can be an intimidating place for anyone who isn't a total muscle head. I workout because I feel it combats my depression.

[CharleneT]

Sadly, I'm another MTF answering a Q for FTM ... but I think the issue of gym use can be looked at in a general sense.

I'm pre-op, and have been living full time for 14 months now. I go to swim at two different pools (community and the one at the University). I use the women's locker room at both. Obviously I'm wearing a women's suit. As well I change into surgical scrubs every other day, in a small and crowded locker room at the hospital where I work. For me, it all works out fine. At first it was very spooky, I did worry about causing a scene. As well, yes, there are things I need to do to ensure that I do not make those around me uncomfortable. Basically, you better pass pretty well. You'll never know for sure if it is "all the time" because in truth you don't know you've been read until someone calls you on it. There may be someone who reads you, but just isn't bothered enough to say anything. That's ok, it can work.

I say, go ahead and use the gym, if you feel that you can pass enough that those around you will not notice. Of course, anyone who is pre-surgical is going to have to have a plan for how to not be nude in front of others. At least in women's locker rooms that is very possible, as women often change in a way that they are not completely nude at any point. Men are a bit different, but you'll be ok because there are also shy men.

I will say that I think in either direction (FTM or MTF) you had better be very confident of your presentation. You need to be at the point where you are just living as you are, and not really "thinking" about how to act anymore.

p.s. -- while the idea that a particular chain might be more friendly toward TG folks is a good thing to research, it is how you interact directly with others of the gender that you are presenting in that really matters. Finding a "freindly" gym is a good idea, might be easiest to find by looking for places where gay folks are comfortable.