*Not* trying to pass

[UNDERDRESSER]

So, not sure if this forum is the one I want, but here goes...

I am not sure I want to try and pass as a female, while the idea does have some attraction, that doesn't feel like what I want. I'll admit it, dressing in female clothing is a turn on, getting away with it in public is definitely something I like. I use panties almost all the time, I try for a style that would pass as a male "slip" in European parlance, they were what I wore in the UK anyway. I have worn woman's bike shorts, ( Not much difference there ) and sporty bikini bottoms instead of men's speedos. The difference there is perhaps more identifiable, if you knew what you were looking at, but where I do that, men's speedos are uncommon anyway, so there is little chance any one would say anything. It's almost a cliché, but a large part of why I prefer these styles *is* comfort, men's underwear frankly sucks, you can get better, but they are hard to find and cost a fortune. Have you ever tried to find a well made pair of men's seamless underwear for under $25?

I would like to wear more sleek and sexy mens wear, but finding something like that outside the sporting or club wear is difficult. I would like to come off as a "beautiful" male. I would like to show off my body more. I wish I had come to this earlier, age is now making it hard to do that, though I am in excellent shape for my age.

One thing that bothers me, the terms crossdressing and transvestitism are more or less interchangeable today, I seem to remember when crossdressing was more of a description of what I do, whereas TV was the description for a man trying to look like a woman. What would you call a guy like me that likes to wear female clothing without trying to pass?

Are others on here identifying with what I am saying?

[minalost]

Welcome to the best crossdressing forum on the web! I'm actually in both camps. I love to present as a woman, but I also like to "underdress" in panties, a cami, and weather permiting, panty hose; and I've even been out in fem jeans. You're right about the "thrill" of being out and about in fem clothing (even if no one but me knows...): it's just plain fun!

As far as the crossdresser vs transvestite question goes... there have been dozens of threads devoted to this question. This site has a decent search functions so you might want to check it out. When I have to use a label (not often) I prefer crossdresser. It's sounds (to me) less clinical, and more friendly. But that's just my opinion.

[Karren H]

If you want to use labels that's fine but I believe they are user definable!! Passing isn't the be all or end all and it is fun but its over rated imho. Wear what you want, where you want... I do.. And welcome!

[ThiHi]

Agreed. I don't really want to 'pass'. I'm pretty fem as a guy anyway, and underdress all the time, and put on stockings, garters, a skirt at home all the time. I just want to add those clothes in the rest of my life. We're working towards it. ;-)

[sissystephanie]

Underdresser, you are a crossdresser!! No more, no less!! A Transvestite is a man who dresses as a woman for sexual purposes. That is the accepted medical description. A crossdresser may be both, but most ordinary crossdressers are not. Since my wife passed away I no longer try to pass, since she was the one who did my makeup and fixed my wig. Now I just dress totally enfemme, and go out in public! Been doing it for six years, and can count on one hand the number of negative comments I have had made to me. BTW, I have been a crossdresser for 70 years!! My attitude is what I wear is my business, and mine only as long as I am decent!

[eluuzion]

hey U,

Welcome aboard. Plenty of paddles here, but sorry, no life-jackets...:heehee:

As to your "question",

In a contract it is also possible to be the crossdressee or the crossdressor, depending upon who made the contract offer and who will accept it. But the contract would probababblingbully not be valid if you referred to one party as the crossdressee and the other party the transvestor.

I hope that clears things up for you...:D

The good news is that we all get to pick our own labels, or make up one of our own! "Earth", what a planet, eh?

Remember,
We are all exactly alike, except for being totally different.
You are a unique individual, just like everybody else...:hugs:

:love:

[Swottie]

eluuzion, now I'm confused... contract? What?

[docrobbysherry]

This IS what u r, UD!

"A guy who likes wearing womens clothes!" Write it down, so u can tell EVERYONE who ASKS u what u r!

[Rachel Morley]

What would I call a guy like you that likes to wear female clothing without trying to pass? ..... err ... how about a "Gem" (gender enhanced male) ... or a "Mirl" (male girl) ... or maybe just someone who just happens to enjoy wearing clothes that are usually associated with women?

Seriously, I don't think you need to have a "label" ... it sounds like to me you might find some friends with the "Total Clothing Rights" folks. My understanding is that they are people who just want to wear the clothes they want to wear ... regardless of who those clothes were designed for. I believe even Eddie Izzard said he agreed with total clothing rights. Since when has a decorative, functional piece of cloth had a gender? :2c:

[Loni]

as far as the written word goes crossdresser,cross dresser,cross-dresser and the word transvestite all are the same in the word form, just different languages and spelling forms..

but to some they have very different meanings, some not so good.

to be called a transvestite could be a bad deal. as it has tended to get a bad wrap for a word.

nether wording means anything about sexual intent. good/bad/ugly. but tends to be used as bad by those who do not understand or fear what we do.
best anyone can do i try to understand and live there life to the fullest.

.

[Bridget Fitzgerald]

If you don't want to dress to blend or pass, don't. As for what catagory, what are you filling out forms or something?

[Gillian Gigs]

I am an underdresser first, who occasionally likes to go the whole 9 yards. What is the big deal, a name is only a name. I wear hi-cut nylon panties 24/7 because there are the most comfortable underwear that I have ever worn. What's not to like about lingerie, smooth, comfortable and sexy. The best part about underdressing is that you can do it all of the time and nobody knows. Crossdresser, transvestite, underdresser, a rose by any other name is still a rose.

[JustAlex]

Underdressing rocks! :D

I don't like labels either. What's the point? If we were to label with extreme precision all our different behaviors, we would need a forum for each one of us.
I'm with Rachel Morley. I buy fresh cotton/lycra panties, I'm a comfy-dresser. Sometimes with lace, I'm a lacy-dresser. I bought packs of Hanes cotton basics that were on sale, I'm a budget-dresser. If you really need to pick a label, get one that's fun to have rather than one that constrains you.