How womanly?

[Kate Simmons]

Many say when they crossdress they feel like a girl or feel like a woman. CDing is a process with a purpose whether many realize and admit it or not. In any case, I was wondering how many actually feel different as if having the feeling of what they feel a woman feels like when dressed? I was also tying it in to one of my previous questions about dressing 24/7. If you had the opportunity and desire to do that would you go ahead and do it, given it makes you feel "womanly"? Do you really think you would be able to "pass muster" by others and be considered as a woman by them? Why or why not?:)

[Cynthia Anne]

Yes, I feel like a woman all the time, although I would never past in most eyes I give it my all! "Man I feel like a Woman!"

[Karren H]

I can look like a woman and act like a woman and do womanly things but I will never truly feel like a woman because I'm not a woman. Only women know how they feel.... We can only guess... And I'll bet you "oh I feel so girlie" is not what they feel.. Lol. As far as passing muster.... I only have to satisfy myself.

[Loni]

i am not sure how a woman feels, i just know i like dressing and trying looking pretty, not a sexual turn on, just it turns on something in me that just feels right.
i do spend most of my time in woman's clothing, even my drab clothing is mostly from the woman's dept. at work is the only place for mens shirt and pants. as company required uniform. but they are baggy and ill fitting.
if it could be set up and i could still make good money i would like to do it 24-7. but that would mean a new job, city to live in. friends? some of the ones i have know for years would have problems.

as for "passing muster" i do not know, my looks do not say born as a woman. the way i talk says man, some of my actions are male, some are female.
my hobbies are not quite womanly. but a lot of women do them.

as for acceptance, that is a big question. i would say some will as they are open minded. while others are so closed minded the sun never gets in there. and the largest numbers will just not care one way or the other. probably not do things with you, but not want you to move out. but such is life.

[LilSissyStevie]

I don't know what women feel and I don't think that any woman even knows what women feel. I'm a genetic male and I can't say I know how men feel. I do know what it is like to feel feminine or masculine. I think everybody is capable of that. I just have more of a feminine impulse than most men. Dressing is just a way for me to express that femininity. I'll never pass as a woman but I can still be feminine. As far as 24/7 goes, out where I live all the women wear jeans, t-shirt/flannel shirt and cowboy boots with a cowboy hat -same as the men. So, no, thank you.

[Persephone]

An interesting question, Denise! One I've pondered upon many a dreary midnight.

My conclusion is that there is no "manly" and no "womanly" way to feel. Unlike computers which come with Windows operating systems or Mac operating systems, each human being comes with her own operating system, we simply don't think alike.

At a casual level, you don't even know for sure that I see the color that we both call "pink" the same way that you do.

Yes, there are some behavioral patterns that women usually do one way and men usually do another way, but for the most part they appear to be learned behaviors that are sometimes different in different cultures and that have even differed over time in a single culture.

So all I can be sure of is how I think and feel and, in general, I seem to feel best living in "girl world." For me that not only means dressing en femme, it means being out and about, interacting with people as a woman.

Which gets to the second part of your post, "passing muster." I've certainly found that I can do that at a casual level. I can comfortably chat with others without them having the slightest suspicion.

Can I really do it in a long-term relationship like being a member of a women's group? The jury is still out on that one and, goven the broad tolerance most people exhibit these days, perhaps I will never know. What I do know so far is that I can be accepted and be comfortable in such groups, and that makes me happy.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[suzy1]

When I’m Suzy I feel like what I think! women feel like.
I also feel inside that there is a female side to me anyway.
Are you asking if I think I would be considered as a woman by other women? If I passed 100% as looking female to them then yes, I do.
But that’s as far as I can go to figuring it out. I just know that it feels right to be Suzy.

My brain is beginning to hurt with all this thinking.

SUZY

[Rianna Humble]

I think I would probably agree with you that dressing makes me feel more womanly. I already dress 24/7 because that is part of who I am.

Do I "pass muster"? I'm not absolutely sure, but I know that I am accepted as a woman by many women at the office building where I work. They know, because they have seen me before, that I was not born in a female body, but they definitely treat me as one of them.

When I am out and about, I get called "miss", "love", or "darling" far more often than I get called "sir" or "mate" and this despite my voice not matching my presentation yet.

A good example of this acceptance would be the optician who examined my eyes recently. We spent a good 45 min to 1 hour together, and at no time did she mistake my gender. When it came time for me to order my glasses, she handed me over to the SA with these words "This is Rianna, I would like you to help her to choose her new glasses, please".

[joank]

Feel like a woman? Well, I was out shopping for necessities today and forgot how I was dressed most of the time. Slacks, low wedgie shoes and a sweater. Nothing out of line with the mainstream of older women's dress.

[Dr.Susan]

I can look like a woman and act like a woman and do womanly things but I will never truly feel like a woman because I'm not a woman. Only women know how they feel.... We can only guess... And I'll bet you "oh I feel so girlie" is not what they feel.. Lol. As far as passing muster.... I only have to satisfy myself.

My feelings exactly!

[DebsUK]

I feel just like me. I wouldn't know what it feels like to be a woman, but also I have no idea what it feels like to be a different man. I mean, most men don't want to wear dresses, so I'm guessing I feel different to them

[Kate Simmons]

All good replies my friends. I think that we feel like just plain people most of the time with enhancements one way or the other. The spice of life really.:)

[docrobbysherry]

I feel like ME wearing sexy fem things!:D

The idea of "feeling like woman" never enters my mind! Because I have no idea what that feels like!:straightface:

I also never think I feel like a frog, a sea lion, or Barack Obama!:brolleyes:

I have no reference for THOSE either!:devil:

[sissystephanie]

Even after almost 50 years of married life before she passed away, I still have no idea what being a woman feels like!! Since I was born a man, and still am one, I never will. I just like to dress like a woman, not be one!! Karren's answer was probably the best!!

[Savanna]

I really can’t say I know what it feels like to be a woman. If I try to do some serious self-assessment, I may be a little more female than the typical male or even slightly more female than male. I don’t quite know. But, for me, that’s not really what my dressing is all about.

Instead, I think there is something either in my brain wiring or possibly in very early development that is more obscure and narrow but often very powerful. It’s as if there is a feeling or “voice” simply urging me to try to present myself as female. That voice is a little fuzzy on the details and leaves me to figure out a lot on my own. It may provide a little guidance. But, the rest comes from my observations, perceptions and maybe even some stereotyping. I’m sure that heterosexual attraction to women also gets thrown into the mix as well. I think it’s possible that we all have that kind of instinct buried in our brains. But, since it would normally be consistent with our physical anatomy, we might never know it exists.

I think I present myself as a fairly typical male most of the time. But, that could come from training and habit. The “voices” guiding me could have been all external rather than internal.

All I know is that when I answer that female “voice”, it feels good and I enjoy it. It feels comfortable and right. It almost seems to feel natural. Since I don’t get to do it very often, it often feels exhilarating. I have sometimes compared myself to a woman whose work and other practical needs require her to dress in male like or very androgynous clothing most of the time. Maybe she’s in a role in which it is better that she not show too much of her femininity. But, she still enjoys getting all dolled up and looking and feeling pretty, feminine and charming on special occasions. She just doesn’t get to do it as often as she would like. I suggest that, on some level, what I feel may be a little like what she feels on those occasions and that the feeling is something different than a typical man feels when trying hard to present himself as very male.

If I could dress 24/7, I suspect that it would gradually feel less exhilarating but more natural. I don’t know if I could really pass muster, but since I am a little shorter and smaller than the average male, I might not be too obvious. Looking back at pictures from when I was younger, I sure was cute with that really long hair. Now, I don’t have much left.

[Shari]

Well Denise, I cannot feel anymore like a woman than a woman can feel like a man.

I can feel pretty sometimes if that counts. I've also felt good about myself on occasion with new male clothes, maybe a new suit I think I look good in. It's not exactly the same feeling but pretty close.

As far as passing muster, all I can do is leave you with this line from Dirty Harry.
"A man has to know his limitations."

[SusanQ]

Obviously I can't really know how it actually feels to be a woman, but when I am dressed as one I feel like I am one. All my like I've enjoyed activities more typical of girls than boys, and the company of women much more than men (in a non-sexual manner). I don't want to embarrass anyone, but the most private part of my anatomy has always been quite small. (So small that I can't urinate in the traditional male manner...I have to sit down to do that.) I was born 2 months premature, and I've always wondered if I actually was a complete male when I was born. (I do know that when I wear female gaements, particularly undergarments, they fit me quite well without me needing to tuck anything away...they just look the same as if a female was wearing them. When I look at myself en femme, I see a woman, even though I know it is a faux woman. I'm married to a wonderful a lady, am too old, and in basically crummy health...so no desire to surgically change the little that I have. But mentally I frequently think of mysel as female.

[Joanne f]

I would imagine that what i feel is a bit like a womanly man or a manly woman , something in between the two and do i think that i could pass and be considered a woman by anyone " NO"

[april_lynn]

When I do get to dress as a woman, which isn't that often it definately feels like there is a woman inside me that finally gets to exist without being pressured by society to be something that I am not. I am for from convincing as a woman, at least at this point, but hope that one day I will be able to venture out and receive some acceptance as a woman. I have also found though that just underdressing everyday really has helped ease my overall emotional well-being so that even when I am forced to be male, the woman inside my brain can feel a little bit more comfortable.

April

[Kate Simmons]

It seems strange that even when we seem to have all of the "props", the mindset and the "smoke and mirrors" to make the presentation, many still do not consider themselves womanly. What, then, is the real point, other than being able to feel better by the freedom of expression, I guess?:)

[sherib]

When I crossdress, I feel feminine but I still feel like ME. A man who enjoy the feeling of being a woman. When I'm in drab, I enjoy being a man.

[Sarasometimes]

When fully dressed I feel most connected to my perception of femininity. When in male attire I feelmost connected to my perception of masculinity. As stated by many we can only guess what it feels like to be a women. I guess that the soft feel of a cute sweater is probably the same for me and what a woman wearing it would experience. Just for me it may bit a bit more special since it isn't an everyday thing for me.
As for 24/7, not my plan. One reason they require you to do that for a year before reassignment surgery is so you can be more sure it feel right. I understand that with much $$ hair removal can be made easier, facial structures can be made softer but even with all that I can't see myself enjoying the rigors of always looking girlie, pretty or well put together. There are days when i could dress but i don't have adequate need or motivation to go through the process. That is what i base these comments on. I'm sure there are others who would do anything for another opportunity to dress and never pass them up. Just not me. I like both options and modes of me.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

Thats why I transition to a woman I am a woman feel and act like one.

[KrystalA]

When en femme, I can't really say I feel womanly, but I sure do feel "girly". I can't explain the distinction between the two, but to me, there's a difference.

[Sarasometimes]

Thats why I transition to a woman I am a woman feel and act like one.

So glad you feel so good now! Was the year in waiting tough? I know they start hormones and such but still I would think being on the fence has got to be difficult.

[Rianna Humble]

So glad you feel so good now! Was the year in waiting tough? I know they start hormones and such but still I would think being on the fence has got to be difficult.

I can't speak for Jennifer, but I don't think of the time I am going through at the moment as "sitting on the fence". It is a time of progression and unlearning some behaviours. My transition is going to last a lot longer than 1 year for a variety of reasons, but it will definitely not be wasted time. I also need to make progress with my voice, although I am already accepted as a woman without that.

Please don't take this as a rebuke - that is not the intention. I just wanted to share my point of view on this question.

[Lip5tick_Li5a]

I don't feel like a woman at all. In fact, it feels like fake pretending. This is why I'm down with COSTUMES (Halloween, drag shows, ect), but could never consider trying to "pass" full time. Even when in a female costume (like at a Lady Gaga party), I'm still a dude playing a role. I don't think I could seriously face a room full of women as a transsexual, claiming to be one of them.

No, I'm a guy. A sensitive and open-minded guy who prefers female company and isn't embarrassed to play on the other side of the fence, but who knows where to draw the line between play and reality. Going to one party as Lady Gaga doesn't make me a woman anymore than my male Mafia costume (pinstripes suit and Tommy gun) could make me Italian.

[Tina B.]

Feel like a woman? I've been married for almost 40 years, and I still have no idea as to how a woman thinks, much less feels. So do I feel like a woman, well some times, just for a sec, maybe. The rest of the time, I'm just a guy in a dress. So why do I do it? Because when this guy puts on a dress, I feel pretty, I feel softer in my attitudes and feelings, I become more empathetic of my fellow man, Deep inside I am filled with a warmth and contentment, I feel whole. Beyond that I have no idea why I still do it.
Tina B.

[Linda Stockings]

A wonderful and fascinating set of thoughts. Since I felt the silkyness of a pair of sheer stockings for the first time (about age 7), to trying makeup (age 15), high heels (about 17), and of course the first time I was ever with a woman sexually, I have been fascinated with what it would feel like to be totally female and how I would act. How would I dress, behave, look, you name it. And I've thought about all the difficulties too. What if I didn't look pretty no matter how much makeup or pretty clothes? My SO says she wishes I could be her for awhile so I would know how good I make her feel - I think that's about the nicest compliment I've ever received from a GG. It's one of my biggest fantasies to be able to try it for awhile, but eventually the diffculties with looking as good as they do on a daily basis would probably make me go back. When I dress I feel comfortable, calm, excited, attractive, and compassionate all at the same time. I still don't know what it feels like to be a woman. But I'll never stop trying.

[Christina..x]

i just love the feeling when dressed feel as if don't care

[sometimes_miss]

Do you really think you would be able to "pass muster" by others and be considered as a woman by them? Why or why not?:)
First off, very, very few of us would ever 'pass muster' and be considered a woman by anyone. Most of the world considers us 'men in dresses'. The only things I feel differently when dressed as a girl are of course the physical things; long hair, necklace/bracelet/earrings, bra, slip/nylon panties/stockings/skirt sliding on my skin, heels, etc.. Mentally? I feel the same...just me.

[SharonOfLB]

Well I crossdress privately from the neck down. But when I do put on the clothes, I feel really feminine. Something about the clothes just have me feeling that way. Especially the silk stockings. I'm far from being able to pass physically with my body form being bulky. and since I only dress neck down, I still have facial hair.

[Gillian Gigs]

I say this with tongue in cheek, and a touch of sarcasm. I was in a barn once and I didn't feel like a cow. I have done the complete makeover, it looked and felt good, but did I feel like a woman? I don't know as I had nothing to guage it against. Someone needs to invent a transfer machine that could translate you into a female body, complete from hormones to body shape. Then give that person 3 months to get the feel of it. Then maybe I could answer the question about how womanly I am, or might be.

[Sandygal]

When I dress up as a woman. I feel..........Good.

[Jeannie]

I can look like a woman and act like a woman and do womanly things but I will never truly feel like a woman because I'm not a woman. Only women know how they feel.... We can only guess... And I'll bet you "oh I feel so girlie" is not what they feel.. Lol.

I think Karren has hit the nail on the head. Until we can start having babies and experiencing the monthly visitor we can not truly feel what women feel. I sometimes think that the range and intensity of emotions that women feel would probably kill me out right. As for passing, sorry, I still look like a man in a womens clothes with a wig and makeup on. It does feel very different and very pleasurable to wear all of those things and I love the shoes.

Jeannie

[darla_g]

I can look like a woman and act like a woman and do womanly things but I will never truly feel like a woman because I'm not a woman. Only women know how they feel.... We can only guess... And I'll bet you "oh I feel so girlie" is not what they feel.. Lol. As far as passing muster.... I only have to satisfy myself.

I like Karren's comment and agree completely. i asked my GF about this and it's kind of a BS notion. She likes a lot of stuff that most likely would not be considered "womanly" and maybe thats why I like her :-)

[Charise52]

To tell the truth, I am so used to wearing womens jeans, tops and sweaters and socks, sandals and earrings, with camis and panties underneath... I still feel like a man, and I interact with my women friends as a man (and they accept me)... yet when I put on a skirt or a dress, I feel a definite change... I feel very feminine... yet, from observing my GG friends, they all seem to want to look good and wear flattering clothes that fit well... that seems to be their focus... so I think that we may actually feel more feminine than they do...

[Samantha43]

I don't know what a woman feels like, but I know I prefer seeing Samantha in the mirror. My wife says I'm more at ease and easier to get along with as Samantha, so Samantha must change me in a positive way. I've never really been able to figure women out, even after being married to one for 23 years. My male brain just can't understand their thought process.

Would I like to be Samantha 24/7/365? I'm not sure. When I'm Samantha and really enjoying myself I would say yes. When I'm out with the guys having a great time, I would say no.

I'm 6'0" tall and 190 pounds with very little body fat, broad shoulders, no hips and no ass (linebacker build), so it's not really an option for me. Now if I was 5'8" tall and could pass, I might reconsider.....

[suchacutie]

Is this really the right question?

Why, after 55 years as a "card-carrying" guy, did Tina suddenly appear? The answer is that my wife and I finally realized that there is a feminine part of me that has, historically, been very successful in interacting with woman, especially professionally. The first time that I ever dressed, and that was in front of my wife, we both were just amazed that this feminine person was lurking there just under the radar screen. What did we do? We let her see the light of day!

So, it's 5.5 years later. What have we discovered? Is Tina a guy in a dress. Clearly not! Does she act differently from him? Yes, absolutely. Tina has different likes and dislikes, different opinions on many topics, and a very different view of life in so many respects. And, bizarre as it may seem, she's mostly left handed and he's mostly right handed.

Does that make her a woman? Nope. Does it make her separate? It seems that in many ways it does! Same body, same mind, but both are used very differently depending upon the gender being presented. Could Tina go 24/7? In bursts, YES. Forever? NO. At the moment, Tina is limited to something less than 24 hours at a crack. Does that make transition back and forth difficult? A bit.

So, bottom line: Tina has a seriously different world view. She has a more feminine approach to most of life. My wife says she has progressed from infancy to somewhere in mid adolescence in socialization maturity. Tina still has a lot of "growing up as a girl" to do and experiences to have. She will never be a woman. Will she pass muster? We sure hope so, but for whom? For us, of course!

:)

tina

[Annaliese2010]

I can look like a woman and act like a woman and do womanly things but I will never truly feel like a woman because I'm not a woman. Only women know how they feel.... We can only guess... And I'll bet you "oh I feel so girlie" is not what they feel.. Lol. As far as passing muster.... I only have to satisfy myself.That's rational, balanced, down to earth and...well...brilliant actually!

[Kate Simmons]

My conclusion then is that feeling womanly is subjective, depending on the individual person. You have to consider the person even if a blanket statement is issued to the effect of: "I feel girly", "I feel femme" or "I feel like a woman.":)

[Raychel]

Do I feel like a woman when dresses? Well if you were to touch my chest, My guess is you would say that it feels like a womans chest. What does my brain think about how I feel on the inside? Well for that I feel just the same, no matter how I am dressed. Just like me and that is a guy. I don't ever really feel like a girl. The only real difference is that when I am dressed as a girl I feel more comfortable on the outside and more relaxed in the clothes I enjoy. I just like the softer womans clothes. If possible I would dress as a woman everyday from the neck down, No makeup or wig. Just enjoy the great clothes and carry on.

[Alisa]

I can look like a woman and act like a woman and do womanly things but I will never truly feel like a woman because I'm not a woman. Only women know how they feel.... We can only guess... And I'll bet you "oh I feel so girlie" is not what they feel.. Lol. As far as passing muster.... I only have to satisfy myself.

I think Karren has it just about right. The only thing I'd add is that I do very much enjoy "the feeling" but I can never know if it approximates that of a woman.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Do i.... FEEL .... like a woman, Or a male for that matter. that puts me in a corner. I see both sides yet can not attain ether,
I cant feel what its like to carry my child tho in my head i know & the Emotions yes , I dont just feel as a woman because i am a woman , just not quite totaly all woman.

do i pass muster.

Oh dear. not on facal looks , body wise yes. pretty close .

If the word meaning of feel is about Psychologiclly , Emotionally . then yes very much so. that really has to do with how im wired.

Those of you who are men say you are . you know that deep with in . you see i dont, a little yes to some degree , enough to understand some details
Yet i lack this, i dont relate to men. yet i relate fully to women.

...noeleena...

[Jeanna]

I can say that there is a lot of "woman" in me or I wouldn't be participating in all of this. I'm not sure sure that I know what it's like to think like a real man because I'm way to feminine. When you are in the middle ground, I guess you feel like both. Who knows, I just don't want to go crazy in trying to process it all.

[Kathryn Philips]

I don't think people of both genders feel any different other than body awarereness feelings caused by the anatomical differences. Unfortunatelly I will never know what it feels like having breasts, etc. I believe that female behaviour and thought processes are more ,than anything, conditioned by upbringing and social convention, even though there is plenty of scientific evidence that our brains are wired differently. I think we (the people is this forum) think that women feel much different, because we yearn to be or to be like a woman to a greater or lesser extent. If I was born a female, I would most probably be just a normal woman an not feel in any way special. As a male not 100% at ease with my gender, I feel special and different to the majority of males. I like this feeling and when I change my physical apperance by dressing, even though its is always briefly, I feel great and very happy. I also find that feminine mannerisms come naturally to me as soon as I am Kattie.

[Alisa]

Until we can start having babies and experiencing the monthly visitor we can not truly feel what women feel. I sometimes think that the range and intensity of emotions that women feel would probably kill me out right.


My conclusion then is that feeling womanly is subjective, depending on the individual person. You have to consider the person even if a blanket statement is issued to the effect of: "I feel girly", "I feel femme" or "I feel like a woman.":)

I think Jeannie makes a good point. Probably the girls in transition are the only ones that can truly come close to answering the primary question here about feeling like a woman but even that would only be an approximation. A womans perception of the world and therefore how they feel is most certainly impacted by chemistry, plumbing, etc as much if not more than social influences. You can say that feeling like a woman is subjective but I think that may be a bit disrespectful.

We may be able to "feel girly". A prepubescent girl's perception of the world is primarily influenced by society (physical factors probably not much of an influence) so an astute observer or practiced trans person could probably understand "feeling girly".

[Frédérique]

Many say when they crossdress they feel like a girl or feel like a woman. CDing is a process with a purpose whether many realize and admit it or not. In any case, I was wondering how many actually feel different as if having the feeling of what they feel a woman feels like when dressed? I was also tying it in to one of my previous questions about dressing 24/7. If you had the opportunity and desire to do that would you go ahead and do it, given it makes you feel "womanly"? Do you really think you would be able to "pass muster" by others and be considered as a woman by them? Why or why not?

You’re asking several different questions… :thinking:

Yes, I do feel different when I dress, which is the main reason WHY I dress, but I have no idea what a woman feels like when SHE dresses – in this regard, acquiring or fostering a “womanly” feeling is a completely meaningless activity…

Would I dress 24/7? Sure, why not? Would it make me feel “womanly?” That is not my goal with crossdressing, nor do I concern myself with how a woman thinks or feels. I feel like myself, regardless of how I’m dressed, but female clothes seem more correct, according to my personality and emotional make-up. Becoming less MALE in some way is not necessarily a "womanly" action or virtue, but I suppose you have to call it something…

Would I “pass muster” and be considered a woman by others? Not really, but I couldn’t care less. As long as I’m happy with myself I really don’t need the approval of others…

[Sharon B.]

I feel feminine 90% of the time even when I am drab attire it doesn't feel right or maybe I should say I am a sissy 90% of the time.
If it was possible for me to experience a monthly cycle of bleeding as a woman does I would do it in a heart beat. I do by feminine hygiene products when in drab attire, it helps me to feel more like a woman. It has been a while since I have venture outside as a woman, would I pass muster, in my mind I am a woman. There are tall women, some that are not head turners, but they are naturally women.
Why can't we pass muster?