Ever thrown out your "femme" belongings, then REGRET it!!??

[altoid71]

yeah ive done that twice now. before my move here to dallas, and then a year later breastforms and all (400 a pair forms) in the dumpster....twice!!!
AHHH i did it cuz i gained a roomate and am fearful of him finding out . lol but i cant help getting ticked at myself for doing it. i mean ive thrown out thousands of dollars of stuff. corsets dresses etc. Anyone have similar problem in past????

[Jeanna]

Yeah, been there , more than once. But you will soon realize as I have,that the clothing doesn't make you, you, and purging won't change anything. The frustration in having to start over, not to mention the $. Next time lock your stuff in a trunk and know that your roommate has no business going into that.

Jeanna

[Valerie Nova]

I didn't. But my mom did once. Lost a nice corset, but most of the rest was from thrift stores. I found one of my skirts later in a thrift store, so at least she didn't just dump them.

[Jenny Gurl]

Thanks to all I have learned here from those sharing personal experiences, I have never purged. I am certain if I ever do I will regret it. I am also certain if the fem side of me ever fades, that it will be back, so there is no use throwing out perfectly good money. As far as the room mate finding out, maybe a secure trunk like the job site boxes at home depot. You could always say it is a good storage locker and secure items you don't want to run off in case of a break in. I think I need to start a new business. I will call it you store it...for her. It would be a storage facility for those who want to store off site, or think they want to purge, again, this time for sure. Sorry about the losses, it seems it is a common theme here. Purge, regret, restock, repeat. Thanks to all who have shared their stories with us here, it has saved countless others from making the same mistake.

[Jenniferathome]

I've purged 4 or maybe 5 times. I think all cross dressers do. Never again. I told my wife about Jennifer and now there is no more fear about anyone finding out.

[siantv2003]

Lost count of the number of times I've done it thorugh guilt or fear. All those heels .... :-(

[Cynthia Anne]

More than once my X dumped my belongings! So the last time she did I dumped her!

[Tanya C]

A lot of crossdressers run hot and cold with their dressing, especially the younger ones. And many make the mistake of thinking they can and will permanently stop, and the resulting purge can be quite costly.
I hope that you will soon reach a point when you realize that your crossdressing is more important to you than accommodating the disdain your roomate may have for your crossdressing.

One more thing, there are cders on this forum who have hidden their things from there wives for decades. You'd think you would be able to hide yours from your roomate for awhile.

[ringedjohn]

I have purged several times, but do so no longer. It took me a while to learn that I would always buy new stuff to replace, more than replace, what I had purged.

[GinaD]

Yes, about five times. I won't do it anymore. I had some great stuff too.

[KrystalA]

Yep, as with most CD'rs I've purged in the past. Over the years, I've probably purged myself of several thousand dollars worth of fem clothing and accessories. I finally learned after about the 5th or 6th time, and haven't purged for quite a long time now. If the 'urge to purge' ever hits again, I'll pack everything in a big 'ol trunk I have, and wait it out, but I honestly don't think I'll ever have the urge again, since I've learned to accept who I am.

[Tina B.]

Put me down for two purges, luckily it was when I was young, and did not have near the money invested in it. But like most, I did lose things that I've never been able to replace, and I regret ever having done it. I confessed to being a cross dresser over thirty five years ago, and have never thought about purging since. Now as close as I come is thinning out the overflow, things that are worn out, outgrown, or where bad buys to Begin with, you know, thinks that just look bad on you. When it comes to womens clothing, I'm a collector, and collectors hate to give up anything from their collection.
Tina B.

[meichenchan]

I've purged three times. The last time I really regretted it as I had some really nice stuff. It was expensive to replace a lot of the stuff the last time, and it was hard enough finding things my size. Never again.

[Karren H]

I have no regrets. That was then and this is not.... Times change and so did I.

[naye]

Yes I had, twice for fear of being discovered by my relatives, now that I am planning to move together with my girlfriend I am thinking of doing it again because I am scared about she finding my crossdressing because I think she can't deal with it and it really hurts =o(.

[christinac]

Yes, I did back a few years ago. Stupiest mistake I ever made. I had got (for a very short time) mixed up with some religious crack pots and the rest is a long story.

Next purge is going to be all the drab! Often think it will be fun to gather all the CD/TG friends that will come and have a huge bonfire fueled by drab clothing. Kind of an official crossing over party.

[Emily Ann Brown]

We have all been there. But never again.

Actually...I have given my breast forms and wig to a needy sister, since I have my own now and grown my own hair.


Em

[brookalicious]

Yep, two purges here. It had to have been over $1000 worth of stuff that I threw out in each of those purges; but hey, everyone's got to learn.

I knew I was throwing them out because I was ashamed of what I was doing. Right before my 3rd purge, I thought to myself: "Even if you're ashamed of what you're doing, you're still wasting thousands of dollars that could be spent on your family." Then I just got a box and I threw everything in it and put it in the attic. It was about 3 months before I got it down again. But at least then I wasn't wasting money trying to replace what I'd thrown away.

Stopping the purges was one of the things that helped me become more secure in myself.

[LeeBe]

I've done the purge thing once! That was long ago, not involving a whole lot of stuff. Now-a-days the only purges are..... I'm just not going to wear that particular "crime of fashion." LOL!

[Annaliese]

Yea, done that, go forward and not make the same mistake. The only clothes I thrown out now are the clothes I've worn out.

[NicoleScott]

Third and final purge was about 17 years ago. I wish I had some of that stuff back, particularly some great high heels.

[kimdl93]

Yes, more than once, but that was long ago! I'm pretty comfortable with myself these days.

[Christy_M]

I have purged 4 or 5 times but not in the last 12 years or so. I had so many favorite things that I tossed out. Now, I have new favorite things and will never purge again. This is a part of me that will not go away, like a bad house guest...jk

[Jessica_Dillon]

I can relate to it as well. Did it once or twice when I was yonger. Now, looking back, my excuse is that I was updating my wardrobe! Anyway...that's my story and I'm sticking to it. Last time all my stuff found it's way to the attic, since I knew it was coming back out anyway. That lasted all of 2 months.

[Thea Pauline]

Fortunately for me, my early purges were collected cast offs. I had some nice things, but life was too fluid to have much. Now however, following my acceptance, I've begun shopping with an eye towards the future and will never purge again.

*tears for all those who have lost heels...*

Renae

[RenneB]

Oh you bet girl. I've perged at least 3 times although most of the clothes were from sources other than buying. That's a long story. If you are ever moving your house via a corporate move where they pay professional movers to pack your stuff. Make sure you take inventory of all your stuff. What a great job I had for a short while. A professional mover/packer. I feel bad about it now, but being left along in a womens room with a bunch of boxes and just me to go through all of it to pack... wow. I only 'barrowed' a single dress or under garmet or two. Nothing major. But what a feeling. Okay so maybe that was TMI.

After that I purged and moved onto another job that paid more but didn't have the wardrobe benefits...

This time, I have the money, the time and the 'net to get what I want when I want and feel good about buying it. However, the next perge (hope it never comes) is going to be a costly one.

Well with the thrift store just down the road, at least some lucky lady will win out...

Renne.....(.)(.)
..............).(
..............(Y)

[Gillian Gigs]

I finally got to the point of swearing that I would never purge again. The last time was just after I came out to my SO. Having an understanding SO has helped out in the pocketbook. Problem now is finding a place to put it all. LOL I have two dressers, one of each.

[leah kernow]

I have purged three times and after the last I have sworn never to do it again, all the beautiful things that I lost that can never really be replaced, or would cost a lot of money if I tried to !

[Julogden]

Yeah, I purged at the insistence of my wife to be, and I really regret it, mainly because part of my purge was old photos of me dressed up back when I was still in high school. I didn't have many clothes or makeup back then so they were no big deal, but I sure wish I had kept the photos.

Carol

[Valerie Nova]

Oh you bet girl. I've perged at least 3 times although most of the clothes were from sources other than buying. That's a long story. If you are ever moving your house via a corporate move where they pay professional movers to pack your stuff. Make sure you take inventory of all your stuff. What a great job I had for a short while. A professional mover/packer. I feel bad about it now, but being left along in a womens room with a bunch of boxes and just me to go through all of it to pack... wow. I only 'barrowed' a single dress or under garmet or two. Nothing major. But what a feeling. Okay so maybe that was TMI.


Don't feel too bad. I used to shoplift clothes because I was too embarassed to go through the checkout. I hate to admit it, but I still do it at thrift stores from time to time, then donate money or clothes back to them to make up for it. Sorry Salvation Army, but I promise your bell ringer will get a nice bonus this year!

[Kelli Jo]

Purged many times. Sometimes after some purchases I'll donate a few dresses to the good will. I try to keep my wardrobe manageable. I think if I didn't get rid of a few items I'd need a bigger closet. But I have regretted a few donations years later. Oh well I love to shop.

[Deanna B]

hi .o yes the old days i have done it 3 or 4 time but 7 or 8 months ago . i was shocked to fine that i was a crossdresser and i am more happyer now and enjoy it the wife not so much

[Kroma]

I did shortly after I first met my fiance, and it co-insided with me telling her. Surprisingly she wanted to keep a few things. I lost a nice bra and panty set which I do miss, but everything else was pretty much crap. Not to mention, since I don't venture outside, I don't have to worry about quality, brand or fit, so I didn't spend a ton rebuilding my wardrobe. One thing I did lose which I wasn't happy about was my wig. When I told my fiance, then gf, that I was having urges to dress again, she tossed my wig (one of the things she wanted to keep) out of fear. She still owes me that one.

[Ann Smith]

I am such a low-commitment, low-intensity crossdresser that I've never not purged. Sounds wierd just to say that, especially in light of all the other comments on this thread. The stuff I buy is always bottom-of-the-barrel junk from thrift stores and dollar stores anyway, so it's a minor amount of money lost. I only dress once or twice a year, then purge and get on with guy existence. It actually works pretty well. I love the fact that I'm transgendered, but I also love the fact that I am on the very mild end of the spectrum, and thus can spend 99 percent of my time drab and happy. The thing I always resented about being transgendered is that it automatically makes you a liar.... because when you're in a social environment and something pejorative about crossdressers or transexual people is said, you have to sit silently or be asked why-so-sympathetic. That's what it's like when you're younger anyway. I don't operate on that basis now, instead I speak up. Too lazy to actually dress much, however, so purging a bag of junky stuff at the end of a rare CD session is actually a relief.

[Jilmac]

Yep, been there done that, so many times I've lost count. During two marriages (both spouses knew but disapproved) I would amass a collection of lingerie and clothing only to purge and start over at a later time. Regrets, yes every time I purged. If I had all the money now that I spent on buying clothes then purging I would probably have enough to supplement my meager social security and live a comfortable retirement.

[Melinda Lou]

I think everyone's purged at some point, and I have done it, usually due to fear of discovery--for example, I've been in the middle of moving, and there was no way to get my stuff out of its hiding place, into something that would stay hidden during the move, and back into a new hiding place at the new place without a major logistical challenge. Lately, though, I've purged items because they wore out, they no longer fit, or I've just grown bored with them, which seems like progress to me.

[Samantha43]

I've never purged. It looks like I am a minority here! I paid too much for that stuff to throw it away!

I have thrown clothing away over the years. Mostly because it was out of style, or I just didn't wear it any more.

I do regret throwing my '80's clothing away. I love the '80's look. I had some great tops, mini skirts and an awesome "big hair" wig!

[kristinacd55]

Never, never, never.....:) BUT, I did lose a breast form once...darn wish i had it now!!

[Valerie Nova]

I am such a low-commitment, low-intensity crossdresser that I've never not purged. Sounds wierd just to say that, especially in light of all the other comments on this thread. The stuff I buy is always bottom-of-the-barrel junk from thrift stores and dollar stores anyway, so it's a minor amount of money lost. I only dress once or twice a year, then purge and get on with guy existence. It actually works pretty well. I love the fact that I'm transgendered, but I also love the fact that I am on the very mild end of the spectrum, and thus can spend 99 percent of my time drab and happy. The thing I always resented about being transgendered is that it automatically makes you a liar.... because when you're in a social environment and something pejorative about crossdressers or transexual people is said, you have to sit silently or be asked why-so-sympathetic. That's what it's like when you're younger anyway. I don't operate on that basis now, instead I speak up. Too lazy to actually dress much, however, so purging a bag of junky stuff at the end of a rare CD session is actually a relief.
Yeah, I usually go a few months between periods of having urges to dress. I usually get them when I'm bored or depressed or both.

I never loved being (partly) transgendered, although it supposedly means you're more creative, and I guess I like that I'm not insecure about my masculinity like a lot of guys. I kind of resent the fact that I don't have more productive urges, or at least more socially-acceptable ones. I don't think it makes you a liar though; I'm sympathetic to gays despite being very much straight. You may want to bring up the fact that being transsexual is a very common reason for suicide. I mean, you have to be at least somewhat sympathetic there.

[danielletorresani]

I can't even begin to count the amount of times I've purged. I shudder to think of how many dollars I've thrown in dumpsters.

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

I purged once, never ever again. What a waste of money with nothing to show for it. Now I carefully select to ensure I have not the desire to purge. I still say we need a central warehouse/storage place where items can be stored till ready to CD again.

[JustineFallow]

Yet another here who has never purged! I've no plans to do so anyway, but after reading all the stories of those who have I'm reminded of this: "Those who fail to learn from their mistakes are fools. Those who fail to learn from the mistakes of others are even BIGGER fools."

[Helen Grandeis]

Only 1 purge here while in Florida on a business trip. I got rid of the most comfy pair of 3-1/2 inch brown pumps the night before I returned home. I was afraid that my wife was going to help me unpack. A totally irrational fear. I spent every evening of a three week business trip "en femme" in the room - it was glorious. Two more trips this spring with a calmer attitude and a chance for maybe getting out this time.

[JustAlex]

The only way to purge and not regret it is not to CD again.

I did purge a couple times and I always regretted it. Luckily, I never purged a whole wardrobe. For example, a couple summers that I spent alone, I bought some stuff that I abandoned before going back home. Looking back, I'm sure I could have found a way to keep it all at home safely. I don't have to tell you how it feels. While I was alone I was safe, with all the family around the anxiety of having a secret would have killed me.

I'm so happy I don't have to worry about it anymore.

[Haley Heather]

I've only purged once and yes I regreted it, immediately too!

[hhdave]

You betcha. I purged I don't know how many pairs of shoes, some capri pants, skirts, nail polish, and women's jeans for someone I really wanted to be in love with. Then she turned out to be not so great and I'm still kicking myself for that.

[Anne2345]

I have several times in the past. The last time was probably around 1996 or so. Although I have always been extremely careful, I did not necessarily purge for fear of being discovered. Primarily, I did it because I stupidly felt guilt and shame that I am a CD. It took me some time to come to terms with it, and achieve self-acceptance over it. And thankfully I did, because that is a part of me I could not deny even if I tried - which I did try, and obviously failed. As much as I love my masculine side, I also love my fem side. There is definitely room for both, and always will be. Since fully accepting that part of myself, I have not felt a need to purge since. Which is not to say I don't replace and update my wardrobe when I get the chance. :)

[countrygirl]

yep, purged once and after that I told myself never again. Six Months later started to buy clothes for Amanda again, and still buying never to purge again.

[Sarah Coleman]

I purged about four years ago. I came to regret doing so.

[Xandria]

i've purged a few times, but it wasnt much.. just a few panties and bras, a skirt or 2 and a blouse. it was all thrift store fodder, nothing spectacular..

i did come close to purging about a month and a half ago.. that was a pretty tense situation for me.

[Billie Jean]

Quite a few times and I'll never do it again. It gets expensive. Billie Jean

[PretzelGirl]

Purge free for XX years! (a girl isn't suppose to tell!)

[Cheryl T]

yeah ive done that twice now. before my move here to dallas, and then a year later breastforms and all (400 a pair forms) in the dumpster....twice!!!
AHHH i did it cuz i gained a roomate and am fearful of him finding out . lol but i cant help getting ticked at myself for doing it. i mean ive thrown out thousands of dollars of stuff. corsets dresses etc. Anyone have similar problem in past????


Better yet..
Ever thrown out all your femme things an NOT REGRETTED IT??????
Didn't think so...

[britney_me]

My life is pretty hectic and sometimes I think of purging not because of guilt but mostly just getting on with my life. Sometimes I think i will be fine without being a CD and so I think of purging. I have some stressful situations in life going on and I cannot afford to drift apart too much.We'll see!!!

[AKAMichelle]

More than once. Now a days that will never happen again

[StarrOfDelite]

Purged once about ten years ago when I got embarrassed and ashamed I couldn't control my urges. Purged again about seven years ago when I was getting divorced (again) and was afraid that if the future ex-Mrs. Starr got hold of something it would cost me more money in spousal support than what it would cost to replace the clothes, et cetera. I lost one really beautiful wig in that episode, that I still cry about, and a really sexy mesh see-through body suit, too. The dresses and jeans were mostly thrift store and EBay second hand stuff, but the shoes, oh my Goodness, the shoes! $$$$$$$

Have finally adjusted to who I am, what I am, and have quit trying to analyze why.

[andreapink]

still new to this and ive done it 4 times already!

[Meg East]

Purged twice. Then about a year ago I was dumping everything until my wife talked me out of the craziness.

[Cindygirl65]

Yes I did it twice but still the woman in me fought to live. Cindy.

[Rachel05]

Never thrown them out and so never had the regret because I know I would for sure

[junetv]

Purging - its one of those things that we go through, due to guilt, fear...thinking that we'll "cure' ourselves or due to the demands of our spouses. It can be quite an expensive reality pill to swallow at times when we realize that it seldom works. I've done it three times so far. I estimate the last time was several thousand dollars into the dumpster. The urge comes back despite my love for my wife (who doesn't tolerate).

Next time, try a storage rental place for a "trial" purge.

[Byron]

Did it once, and will never do it again.

Too expensive $$$.

Even if the stuff just sits there between periods of time is better than starting all over again.

[Tina Leigh]

Did some purges a couple of times back and always srtuggled to get back at some point. So now I just put it away. Not like we can live in a world where there would be no girly things to intice us so might as well not blame the things when I feel the urge. I have to look in the mirror and think about what and why, do and don't. Thanks Dr. Valeri and others for that knowledge about it being inside not outside of me. Never been mugged by a corset that made me wear it, but worth wishing for!

[JenniferR771]

Purged! You bet! Once when a counselor advised me to stop the lying, come clean with my wife, get rid of the clothes and beg her forgiveness. Start over again. Lost a nice human hair wig. She didn't forgive me--we continued tense as usual. Then again(once I found the forgiveness was lukewarm) I didn't purge the rest of my stash.
An earlier time, before Janice knew anything at all. I had a makeover, wig style and photo shoot, in several outfits at a Glamor shots imitator. I looked so pretty. I hid the 8x10 pic in an old college textbook. Later I threw out the pic--thinking, "Why save this picture, it can only be a liability." I wish I had a 15 years younger pic now. Sigh.

[briannad]

I have purged several times over the years, in every case it was because I found what I thought at the time was my true love. In the end, it cost a lot of money to start over so I won't do that again. :)

[donnatracey]

Who hasn't? Several times over many years......really silly when I think about it.......:doh:

[xpshooter]

I threw away my first pair of high heels because I did not think to store them in my car.

Of course, I wish I had them back. :(

[closetslave1]

Oh but of course. I've lost count of the times I've amassed a collection only to throw it all away whilst on a guilt trip thinking that I could 'cure' myself. Needless to say, I never did and never have and the collections just begin again...

[Kathy4ever]

3 or 4 times have done this. Yes i regret it because when you find something that looks pretty and fits right you hate to part with it. I had these knee length black high heel boots is the biggest thing i regret throwing away. Had too my wife was snooping around trying to find my stash. If she found them she would of did it for me. She found my purple dress and forms and threw them away. She is not tolerate of this behavior especially at the beginning. She has made some very small baby steps in letting me wear a night gown to bed, I had to settle on a cotton night gown. I want a strappy night gown that is satin then I woulkd be happy. I want to show off my cleavage.

[Claire Cook]

Wasn't it Mark Twain who said "Quitting [smoking, in this case] is easy -- I've done it hundreds of times". I used to purge when the guilt feelings overcame me. Now I accept it fully (:cheer:). Like others have said, when I think about the amount of $$ I threw out, I realize how silly it was. Well, maybe not. Some of the stuff I bought when I started was pretty trashy, and I wouldn't have gone out and about with it even if I had the nerve. Now I accept that they are my clothes, and I'm much more choosy about what I buy and wear -- and the only time anything goes is if it is worn out or out of style. (Just like a woman!)

[Wendy G]

I've purged more times than I can remember. Thankfully, I've matured to the point that I realize that is not a solution. I have accepted this part of my life and will never do it again. I still miss a powder blue dress I tossed 5 years ago. It's gone forever.:sad:

[Chemise]

Yes, a few times, had a black dress that could have been made for me, plus many other things I loved, all gone.

[Stephanie47]

When I was a novice cross-dresser I tossed ONE dress. My wife was away for a month visiting her family during the summer. I bought a dress and wore it in the apartment. No bra, panty or slip-just the dress and stockings and garter belt. The garter belt and stockings she had bought me. At that time she and I really did not know what a cross-dresser was. Before she came home I tossed the dress. I think the purge was out of disgust for my perceived sexuality. Back in the early 1970's cross-dressers=homosexuals. Now I know better, and, would NEVER toss out my feminine clothing. Now the only garments or shoes I toss are those that are worn out or do not fit.

[StacyCD]

Before I accepted my need to dress in feminine things, I purged a number of times. No more! It's way too expensive to replace everything.

[Proteus]

I've thrown away a few early items, but then they were cheap and didn't fit well, so no regrets.

But thankfully I haven't had a purge proper. Might as well face facts, my crossdressing may wax and wane, but it won't go away, and why should I want it to?

[SandraInHose]

I've 'thinned the herd' a few times, reducing my inventory by a few dresses or shoes I rarely wore, but only one time did I truly purge. That was the day after my wife of (at the time) 17 yrs discovered my stash and was dumbstruck/angry/upset/ etc. I showed her that she came first in my life and threw away everything but my pantyhose. The pantyhose were part of our compromise...she could handle me wearing pantyhose, but she couldn't handle me dressing completely. I was actually OK with that situation for a few years, then the urge came back. I started acquiring a dress here, a skirt here, and now have a small wardrobe that she doesn't know about. I feel terrible dressing behind her back again, but she just can't understand why I that ingrained desire won't go away. But that's a whole 'nother discussion!

My biggest regret from that purge? a lovely pair of leather pumps that fit size 11's like a glove. I've never been able to find another pair that were so comfortable since!

[Pattie O]

I had a purge on the week end but it was all drab ! I enjoy that far more than purging any ladies clothes.I am determined to avoid purging my female wardrobe as has been done on a few occassions in the past.Yes some items need to go but mostly old make up and clothes that are are past their used by date /or unsuitable .:battingeyelashes:

[Laura Evans]

Done it and regreted it several times in my life, but not anymore, I have accepted the inevitable truth

[MillaMarie]

Who among us older than 50 hasn't ? It's been a LONG time but yes on several occasions, hopefully our younger TG's can learn from our idiocy. I'm seeing the new generation becoming very savvy and short cutting our mistakes, becoming more self accepting & confident at much younger ages.

[Donniesr]

I once threw away a dress that fit me perfectly, and was really hot looking..I thought I was done dressing,,WRONG..I wish i stilll had that dress...I don't care who knows anymore..I'm keeping my dresses,,,,and my nightys..

[BillieJoEllen]

Before I went in the service I had to throw everything away. It pained me no end because I really had a lot of neat stuff then. Couldn't leave it in my parents house because it was too small and the chance of them finding everything was too great. Had to wait over three years before I could finally dress again.

[NatashaCD]

I have thrown away my stuff heaps of times but not anymore

I havnt dressed for a few months now but I still have my stuff

[Kendra Sue]

I have purged several times in my cd life. I wish I had that black all in one smoothie and the open toed heels. I loved those things. My mom found some of my stuff when I was at home. She asked me about it but just said put it away. I purged to make her happy

[Sharon B.]

More times than I care to say, now I just pack it away knowing the urge will come double or more.
I really need to go ahead and convert a spare room into a walk in closet and keep all of my feminine things in there as my feminine self has more clothes and shoes than my male self does.

[fiona_libby]

I will have to add my name to the list, but that purge allowed me to focus my thoughts on my true feelings and build my life as I wish
Huggs Fiona

[melanief]

add me to that list, but it has been a few years now. I think it is part of the some what unnatural cycle we go through. The pleasure and excitement of dressing up then the guilt then the purge then regret. The key is to learn from it and realize that there should be no guilt and that purging won't make that thing inside go away. My tip - get a storage unit and if the urge to purge takes you, put it in a box, store it away and then you wont have to go and buy all those things away. There is nothing worse than trying to replace that outfit that you look and feel great in only to find you can't find similar

[SarahMarie42]

Even when I had the desire to purge, I didn't actually purge...I knew that I'd regret it, as the urge to dress would inevitably return.

[Parker0429]

More than once. Dresses, skirts, heels, hosiery, a couple of open bottom girdles I would love to have back. One item I tossed which I truly regret was a beautiful red Cato long sleeve blouse. Pleated front, shoulder pads, hidden buttons. It was exquisite. Usually wore a neutral bra and camisole under it. Matched it with a black knee length pencil skirt, off-black pantyhose and black heels. Oh how I would love to find that blouse again.

[Piora]

Even when I had the desire to purge, I didn't actually purge...I knew that I'd regret it, as the urge to dress would inevitably return.

Yes, indeed. Sometimes, the hiatus is quite long (for me it was 8 years) but that old Pink Fog comes down and you get right back in there again. The reason I purged was that I was moving, and I was afraid that the box with my stuff would be placed in the wrong area, or get opened in error. I lost about 8 corsets, a dozen pairs of stockings, dozens of panties, a shoulder length wig, and other stuff, some of which was quite unique. I think I could have managed to keep the stuff somewhere else, but I wasn't thinking clearly. I won't ever do that again, though.

[cassandra.932]

There is only 2 reason I purge:

1. Force to by SO
2. Worn out items that I want to replace

I don't think roomate should be a problem as he has no business snooping around your things. If you accidentally left them around, so what if he found out. Is he going to throw you out or he volunteer himself out?

[countrygirl]

I purged one time (not of my own choosing) never again though will I purge.

[Patricia Jane]

I did it once, biggest mistake I ever made. I got rid of clothing, jewelery shoes underwear, EVERYTHING! That was the most stupid thing I ever did. Took the longest time ot replace all the items, never able to replace my favorite outfit---- one my wife bought me. One of the mistakes in Life, hope to never do it again!

[altoid71]

well im happy to say as of now my roomates have moved out and im filling up the wardrobe pretty quick again. and the one constant thing i read here is that i cant take away the need or void i have to dress. im 26 now and while i care if people find out.....im NOT THROWING OUT ANYTHING!!! i miss some of my outfits BADLY. i had so many. female cop outfits and a lot of lingerie. over 2k of stuff. ive bought 2 sets of high quality breast forms. 400 a piece. there no FEELING like wearing breast forms. none period. We all fantastize obviously about being a woman and without forms.....while i like the clothing.....it feels empty. so next up i think im getting the new models at breastformstore.com...800 bucks a pair. REAL BREASTS link here: http://www.thebreastformstore.com/breast-forms-real-breasts.aspx?cid=HomeRight and it will be the last set i buy. i want as real as i can get. anyone have reviews of these!?!?

[eluuzion]

No purges here. My mind is too logical I guess.

To me that is analogous with throwing away all your food, stove and refrigerator as a diet strategy. Or having all of your teeth extracted. :heehee:

I stick with more rational behavior and solutions to my personal issues... like smashing my fist on my keyboard when it will not cooperate...:D

:love:

[VS Fan]

Can honestly say I've only parted (in a purging sense) with 2 pairs of panties over the years both at the VERY early stages of this... and it's kinda funny but I still wish I had them back, I suppose for sentimental reasons now that I've fully accepted and am enjoying being a CD!

[briannacd11]

Honestly I cant count the amount of stuff I have thrown out. Its been over a year since I've purged and have learned to just bag up my things and put them in my storage out back. Im getting a lot better about not throwing my things out, i can only imagine the collection I would have If i had never purged.

[Ginger88]

OMG Yes, i lost my favorite pair of F-me boots that way :(

[Delila]

Purges are so costly. I have found that by replacing all that I own of certain items has prevented purges. I own 1 pair of mens underwear for the off chance that I would need them. Most of my socks are women's it makes purging more physically difficult when after you purge you don't have underwear. I think that purges come more often when you are new to CDing once some level of normalty settles in you work through the purge. I still feel the purge need from time to time when it comes on I put on a less feminine pair of panties and remind myself that my true self is not the outcome of a purge but what I am when I am dressed.

[luludoll]

I purged a couple of times before I recently accepted myself & broke out of the closet D: costly! If someone was going through a meltdown I'd recommend purging everything into storage.

[Taylor Skyrim]

I've never had the need to purge, but then I've only owned my own collection for less then 8 months and I live on my own.

[Raynefall]

I had to purge right when my current SO first moved in with me. Didn't want any womens clothing hidden that I would have to explain later. Plus I thought that the urge may go away. Lol. So wrong about that and I regret throwing them away. I would recommend to anyone who purges to hide them really good or rent out a locker and store them. You will most likely be wanting them back.

[danielletorresani]

Many, many times....

This last time was the most complete wardrobe I've ever had. I've regretted it at times, but at this point in my life I'm kinda okay with not dressing up. Of course, ask me again in a year and maybe I'll feel different.

For now, I'm totally satisfied looking at my massive personal library of pics I took while dressing up....

[Michaela42]

I think it would be amazing to find more than a handful of people like us who have NOT thrown everything out in frustration or what have you. I believe that I am up to my third or fourth purge by now. Estimated loss in money ~$9,000. Estimated loss in sanity when buying everything again . . . WAY TOO HIGH!

For everyone who reads this thread, now and in the future; for the love of everything Find some place to store your stuff. The small price in rent you will pay will be nothing compared to the frustration of buying everything all over again.

[satin n lace]

Yep i have done it a few times also i do regret it like someone else said hide it hide it really because the urge will never go away.

[Janine cd]

I've purged completely twice and partially three more times. After each occurrence, I came to regret it soon after. My biggest regret was giving away five bridesmaids gowns and 32 pairs of shoes which had been barely worn. I also threw out my favorite wig and two sets of breast forms.

[Shoe Fettish Boy]

My favorite black velvet dress and my favorite 4" heels.

[TGMarla]

I've truly purged only once. And at the time, I did regret it. But since then, I have more than made up for it. Now my purges are only for stuff I really don't wear, want, or fit into all that well. I'll either try and sell it all on Ebay, or take it down to Goodwill. Purging is often (I think) an attempt to stop dressing all together, but I'm way too far down the road to believe that will ever happen. So I just accept it, and I no longer get the overwhelming urge to throw everything away.

[mrortho]

Purged once, lost some custom-made lingerie and padlock ankle-strap pumps (both fit PERFECT). HUGE regret, now buried in a landfill for eternity.

[dawnmarrie1961]

I threw out some a pair of leather boots today. Does that count? They were getting kinda worn out.
Back about 7 years ago I stopped needing to wear breast forms and tossed them. I could help but chuckle when I thought what the garbage collector might think if they fell out of the trash can when he tried to empty it into the truck. I had images of two boobs bouncing to the ground and rolling down the driveway into the street where they would get ran over by traffic. SMOOOSH!!
Are breast forms recyclable? Maybe I should have put them in the recycle bin instead?
How long does it take a pair of breast forms to decay in a land fill? Perhaps they will be discovered intact at some time in the distant future and give some indication of exactly what kind of people we were? Now that's a scary thought!

[Longing2be-Trisha]

I had to throw out everything recently, I have been miserable ever since. Have not slept right since. It has been a sad week and very restless nights.

Hugs

[Billiemarie]

yes, then regretted it later. but then again I needed new stuff anyway.

[JenniferS]

I purged again about ten years ago and I regret it still today. My wife still reminds me of it when I spend money on something new today. I threw out some GREAT outfits.

[stonec657]

I purged once about six months ago and still really regret it i lost my favorite skirt that was a gift from one of the only gg's i ever told my secret too so even if I found the same skirt it just wouldn't be the same I hope i never have to do it again it felt like i threw out a part of myself:sad: but it gave me a chance to start a new wardrobe:D

[donnatracey]

I hate the word "purge".......grrrrr.........am very familiar with it.

[ameliabee]

Never have and am never going to. Thanks to you older gals for making mistakes and sharing the wisdom learned!

[Stormgirl]

Yes I can relate, I've been known to purge quite a few stuff before I finally accepted myself and realized that I am trans.

[Brandi layne]

I threw out all my stuff a few years ago cause at the time I was in denial about it but last week I saw a beautiful skirt that I had to have so I bought it and came out to my best friend and she was very accepting of me coming out and is glad that I stopped denying myself who I really am. So now I will never get rid of anything again

[StarrOfDelite]

Three times since I started CD'ing in 1995 approx, but the last time was in 2005. Never again. I haven't had a guilt attack for a long time, and if I do I'm hopeful that I will find less expensive way to assuage my anxieties.

[kimberly ann487]

Well, let's see, it's been four, no, five times I've purged to one degree or another. Every time it was to make my wife happy or should I say, less angry. I have promised myself I will never purge again ! All it does is put off the enevitable.

[TxCassie]

More times than I'd like to remember. When I started dressing again after I turned 40, I developed a plan. I'd would sit down,write the items I would purchase so I could build a wardrobe. But, what would happen is that I would buy, lets say, undergarments, stockings, I'd wear them for a period of time and PURGE.... some months would go by, I'd repeat the process, each time though, I would buy more, wear longer, and PURGE... UGHHHHHHH. I think I'm getting to a point where purging will be a thing of the past. I hope so.

[MargaretJ]

I've been in and out of CDing many times now and just binned my stuff, and never really given it a second thought. However I am really regreting getting rid of a lovely silver satin blouse, and black pencil skirt, on my last purge about 10 years ago. I would dearly love to have those two items back.

[Veronica Lacey]

When I was about 20 I purged but that was the last time. Thankfully it was not very much clothing.
If I ever felt the urge today it would cost me thousands; I would simply box it all up and wait. Thankfully I have not had the urge to purge since that day so long ago.

[joanncd]

Hav'ent we all.......

[Vanity Wilde]

Although I have never purged, it is always sad to me when I hear how many times many girls have. A very important thing to remember is that while you cross dress with clothing, the clothing doesnt make you a crossdresser. You are a crossdresser with or without the clothing: the clothing simply serves as a tactile visual. If crossdressing is in your heart, if it is part of you, throwing away clothing doesnt "throw" away the crossdresser. That is why the urge always comes back. It will ALWAYS come back because there is nothing that can give us the release or connection that dressing does- not golf, not fishing, not even therapy- nothing...

If your clothing is causing a problem at home, rent a small storage unit or pack your things up and let a good friend put them in their attic. Wives may not know this but we are better husbands when we are close to our feminine side.

Vanity Wilde

[betty1253]

No. Perish the thought.

[Princess Ludwyna]

It happened to me many times when i was teen. But I had only a few pieces of feminine clothes, mostly skirts. Looking back it was for bad reasons.
Now i've "built" the perfect outfit i was searching, there is no way i would purge again. I've decided bad reasons can go to hell.

[Shelly67]

Oh yes ! The whole lot a few years back ...... I felt so good on disguarding it all . A month later I felt a right berk regretting it all . I've told my wife about the experience , even informed her I've considered doing it again . Thank goodness she quite frankly remarked if I were ever to get to that point again to just shut the bedroom door where all the clothes are kept , let her know and go and do something else until the notion passes .
Odd isn't it , seems like it happens to some of us in similar circumstances . I've been keeping items of little or no use in my garage for years . Things like old tools , hinges ,bits n bobs , electrical items . It's sods law that soon after clearing out my garage , I was then one day looking for an old item only to have found I'd chucked it out .
Hoarding seems to be an obsession - lol !
Mind you , either way , chucked out female clothing , make up ect , or letting my garage turn into a thrift shop , sometimes brings a stern telling off and earache .




I love it when she tells me off .

[krisinpink]

yep, purged twice over the years. Regretted doing it both times...won't ever do that again!

[PretzelGirl]

I wonder how short this thread would be if the title was "Ever thrown out your "femme" belongings, then NOT REGRET it!!??"

[Samantha W]

Yep. Did the same thing many times. I did it because I was trying to get over my "perversion". Never again. I am so much happier and confidant when I dress as a woman than as a man. If thats perversion, then I want more.

[ArleneRaquel]

Ive purged at least twice and I regret that I gave/threw away some many sexy outfits.

[juno]

I hope that people who purge don't actually THROW AWAY good clothes! Please donate them to a used clothing store. Even better, get a transgender friend that will hold them for you. I would definitely hold clothing for a friend. If you see a potential for purging in your future, look for a friend that can help. Some people actually hold clothes for closeted friends so they can come over and dress. I wish that nobody felt the need to hide it, but there are options.

[myriamcd]

yup
same here
purged several times only to rebuild. Don't plan on doing that again. Have an accepting partner.

[bomba]

yes yes yes and i fear i will again. cant someone stop me!!!!!!!

[janeyb]

a long time ago when i had a bad experience and had to call EMS to help, thank god there was no one at home and my neighbours didn't rat on my wife, but after that i through away all my clothes. i had a beautiful corset that was just so sexy on me, i totally regret it and have not done it since. i had to go into alot of therapy to convince me i was OK with crossdressing and now don't throw anything out.

[Annaliese]

Yes did it once that is all it took. Next time sent all to me, you will still be kicking your self but I will be happy.

[veronika_cd]

:D:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:Yes ... I had my first purge in November........and started buying new stuff again last week :doh:

[SweetIonis]

OMG!!! I could beat myself over the head. I would have SO MANY NICE OUTFITS NOW!! DAMN!!!!

[Jillian Faith]

DUH!!!! Yep count me in too. I've purged once or twice the last time was 1997 while going thru a nasty divorce. At least my wig and breast forms were donated to the Cancer society and the clothes to Goodwill.

[Aprilrain]

I did this more times than I could count! it's called purging, for me it stemmed from a desire to rid myself of this "thing" once and for all YEAH RIGHT! I was not able to change my mind so now I'm changing my body.

[CynthiaD]

Yes, a few times, and I regret every one. I even gave up CDing for several years once because I was so ashamed of myself. Even during that time I was still terrified that someone would discover my secret (by telepathy?) Then one day when I was on the verge of yet another purge, out of shame, I looked at my stuff and thought to myself "These are MY CLOTHES, and I'm never going to throw my clothes away again!" And I never have. I guess you could say I purged myself of purging.

[Kim_Bitzflick]

YEP. Twice. I do regret it.

[Tina P Hose]

I still miss my favorite dress, gone to a landfill. Long sleeves and short and sexy. Maybe in five thousand years, that dress will fertalize a seed and that seed , will be a seeded for a confused young man, to accept his femine side.

SO IT GOES, KILGORE TROUT.



and also that young CD will spell better than myself and all that jazz.

[BlondeFarrah]

I once purged a pair of black patent thighboots. Yes, I know, I am an idiot. I never had a boots like those ones. Wearing them, I felt as I were Catwoman.

I was still young, I had a girlfriend, she didn't know everything... I loved her..I was terribly worried about she discovered me..

[Heather Anne]

Between 2000 and January 2004 I threw everything away. Wish I had not done that. I had 2 outfits I wish I still had. Wont be purging anymore

[Toni Citara]

I've purged my female clothing so many time over my life and it was always due to the shame and fear of being "caught". I would eventually go out and buy more stuff but then I would purge those items as well. Even now to some extent I am concerned that some maintenance guy at my place fixing the a/c might find something laying about, or a girlfriend might be over for the weekend and decide to do a little snooping. I'm still "coming to grips" with myself and hope that eventually I get things figured out and can stop the insanity.


I LOVE THIS COMMENT!!!


... the clothing doesnt make you a crossdresser. You are a crossdresser with or without the clothing: the clothing simply serves as a tactile visual. If crossdressing is in your heart, if it is part of you, throwing away clothing doesnt "throw" away the crossdresser. - Vanity Wilde

[xristy]

I read the subject of this thread and just laughed. What CDer hasn't thrown away something just to regret it later?

It's called purging and it always sucks...

[donnatracey]

Been there...done that...and yes, it sucks and it does tend to get rather expensive.......:sad:

[neha]

Countless time. I have thrown them all away. My breast form, cutest and sexy heels, panties and bra. My corsets. I regret badly. But it keep happening. :-(

[Nicola]

I too have purged several times over the years due to feelings of guilt and shame.

It doesn't work, and I end up buying replacement stuff, whilst regretting the loss of some item or other that can't be replaced.
I hope I will no longer do this - but you never know.

[PamelaGirl]

I have purged too many times and I hope I won't do it again. I feel bad because of all the nice clothes I have thrown away. I would have a complete wardrobe by now without the purging. Ladies, remember that if you purge you will wish you had not done that. I need to find advice on how to prevent the purging from happening.

[Keely]

Of course I have. I think most of us has. The thing I miss most is photos of when I was much younger.

[ArleneRaquel]

I regret all of my silly purges ! :sad:

[JanetK]

Unfortunately I have purged several times. Some times by me, others by family members. I can recall my mom getting rid of my stash twice when I was younger. Some of those items were pretty awesome clothes that I wish I had back. Never again!

[krisinpink]

I've purged twice; never going to do that again. This is me, and that's OK!

[Anne Teak]

I only purged once. Right after my divorce, she knew I cd'd and never had an issue with it, but I suddenly ended up with both boys living with me. One was a teen and I no longer had a legit excuse for the girly stuff being there so I got rid of it. I regretted it almost immediately & started to rebuild. We ended up back together a few years later after working things out and things are better than ever now.

[ashleymasters]

I have had 3 big purges. and I always feel that way. I miss the shoes i had before or the wig. but now instead of purging when i feel that way i just put my things far out of sight so i can feel purged but still have my stuff for another time.

[Mikka]

Twice! The latter when my wife discovered my crossdressing and as she admits now overacted. However, when I begin to purchase items it will be with her 100% permission and hopefully suggestions. Damn, I really miss the clear acrylic platforms!
Oh well, I'm sure they will make more!

Mikka

[eluuzion]

I lied in my earlier post, when I said that I had never "purged". :straightface:

It was about 16 years ago and I did it on a grand scale. Closets and dressers FULL of clothes I had purchased. There was so much stuff and effort involved in throwing out all of my "femme" belongings...that I decided to just leave it all there...and "throw" MYSELF out! :)

Yep, I just left that cheating wife, all of her "femme" belongings, the house, the cars...and just walked into the sunset...:daydreaming:

Was it expensive? You bet. It still is. It is still one of the most "expensive/extensive" investments that I have ever made in my life.

Any REGRETS?
No, regret and rumination about past actions is like trying to back out of a car wreck after the crash. It is impossible to change the past. "Looking back" to times of poor decision-making is wasting productive time absorbing negative thoughts. I choose to spend that time thinking about productive, happy things I CAN do now...like working on my bikini tan on the sundeck tomorrow...:D

So, I would have to say that for me...purging my "femme" belongings worked out pretty well. As usual...It all comes down to perception...for me anyway...

Self-deception can be as handy as duct-tape, if you know how to use it...;)

:love:

[LeanneHowe]

i did that once. think it is a good idea to give myself a cooling period before taking action if i ever get an urge to do it again. going shopping for girly things that feel good to wear is fun. fulfilling, and exciting. my so and i have a wonderful time shopping. the cooling off period applies well to many things, not unlike making major purchases such as home appliances. just seems a good idea to not rush into action based on emotion

[ArleneRaquel]

I have regretted all of my purges. What a waste. Oh my ! :bonk:

[part-time-amanda]

Of course! When our son was born I threw all my stuff in the BBQ in fear he would see me different if he found out. Of course the huge flames sparked neighborhood attention so I quickly put my half burned collection out for fear of the fire department. Looking back I laugh but still miss my first pair of heels and favorite skirt. Obviously i never quit just adopted the dadt policy

[maddygurlco]

I have collected and purged so many times over my life and I always came back to rebuilding my "wardrobe". what a waste of money. The last time I begin to re-establish my feminine accessories, I decided I was not going to trash anything anymore.

[Joann Smith]

The wife purged most of my stuff ....at least the sexy stuff that i liked ...5 inch heels and micro mini you know the ****ty stuff we all love ...she claimed that they were out of style and that we could replace them ....yeah right ...replace them with with granny outfits...oh well i suppose i should be thankful ...and try and work a sexy grandma look ...

Joann

[Vanessa Winters]

I am just recovering from my first purge. I did it because I was gaining two roommates and was paranoid about them finding out. I threw all my femme belongings and a few months later I started buying girl things again. I now keep my femme belongings locked in a suitcase.

[Lip5tick_Li5a]

I purged my only pair of women's shoes. But they were a gift from an ex-best friend, so I really don't miss them because I'm mostly pissed at her.

[MaryAnn40c]

Yes I have dumped my clothes and did regret it....mini's,heels,nylons,bras....dam what a waste.

[Susan_Xdress]

Oh YES !

My very first purge, when I was going to 'grow up' and forget all that dressing up like a girl nonsense. All of my first clothes ... most of them stolen from a cousin, and others from sisters of school friends ... It wasn't just the physical item, but how I got them. I remember every single skirt and panty and there was a story for every garment. I regret the loss of those more than anything.

[teri222]

I can identify with that. My first real outing was the Texas "T" Party back in the 90's.
Later I had this major purge. Big Big mistake.

[bellini]

The sexiest, short suede skirt ever. It had a moth hole! No-one would've noticed! I miss it!

[bridgetta]

just threw out stuff that doent fit.. its annoying, but cant store everything.. and its better to build a good wardrobe of good pieces than have ton of junk to worry about getting found..

[FeelingFem]

Yes, 3 times. I've regretted it each time. I won't do it any longer. I particularly regret throwing out all those strappy sandals and pumps.

[Imeni]

Wow. Seven pages and I think I'm the first to say, no. Not once have I ever felt the need to rid myself of my clothes.

In another thread, one of you ladies had said that I was special. That I had a clear definition of self worth and that I didn't feel the need to conform to the standards of others. Which, ok. I'll give you that to an extent. But alot of what I've read was, everyone seems to ditch the stash because of fear. Fear of being caught. Fear of being harassed and judged. I don't subscribe to that.

Me? I'm awesome. I'm amazing. Fact. No one I know can talk down to me because I might look very silly or not at all feminine in a dress, it doesn't matter. What matters is, it makes me happy. Makes me feel good about myself. And no one dictates my happiness but me. If and when I do decide to get married, while I will take what my SO feels into my decision, ultimately, the decision of what to do is mine. I won't hide my dresses, blouses and other things. Will I have a place in my closet for it, sure. As I only dress in my room, the main dresser is used for my man side, the one who i need to dress quickly without effort on the go. Therefore, it makes sense my guy stuff is out, readily available where putting on my lady things take a bit more effort. Do I hide what I do from my family or friends? No. I simply decided not to tell them about it. Not out of fear, but having to explain who i am and why i do it to 50 more people is just a very large undertaking and I'm tired enough as is. =3

[brenda b smith]

yes i thought i was just a freak of nature and got rid of everything i had hiding in my closet. the funny part is i put it all in the firepit in my backyard and had a big fire. i thought i could stop . but i was wrong .I soon replaced everything I wont do that again im ok now. lol that was about 12 years ago

[Jennifer529]

Yes,and I regret it,I lost many a gorgeous outfit...never again!

[Anna Lorree]

Ugh, yes! Destroyed a beautiful set of matching lingerie from Macy's. Shortly thereafter, I came out to my wife. I had to laugh, she chided me for purging, saying it was a stupid waste of money. I haven't purged in over two years.

Anna

[Kritsin]

Twice now I have thrown everything out only to start all over. Self loathing gets expensive after a while. lol

[Kylie.K]

I have no idea where my wig went. It must have been a victim to a purging at one time or another. Those things aren't cheap you know! Aside from that I mostly purge impulse buys and stuff that I don't plan to ever wear. I recently purged a few dresses and some lingerie that was ready to be retired. But yea, my advice is if you're feeling like you want to bury your desire just box things up and put them in storage. A few months later, or days in some cases, you'll be glad you didn't send them to the dump.

*Hugs*

[biguy]

Yes I did a couple of years ago and I fought the earge to dress but I lost the battle and had to start all over again it won't happen again

[scarlett112]

I've done it a few times and regretted it every time. I lost some very nice stuff (including forms) Never again will I purge but will get rid of stuff that doesn't fit anymore.

[Jocee]

Been there, done that..... probably 20 times when I was a teenage and young adult. Now I have the opposite problem..... I don't though anything out unless my partner pesters me to......

[susancheerleader]

There have been many times I wanted to get rid of Susan's clothes.
But after I remember how much money was spent buying the clothes, I decide to just keep them.

[danielletorresani]

I've probably purged over 10 times throughout my life. Sometimes I regretted it that same night, sometimes it took a year or so, but I think I just about always regret it sooner or later.

[Launa]

I've purged a few times in my life. However I never had the proper gear I starting to accumulate now. I used to live in remote places before and didn't know how to CD anyway. So I bought any crap from I could from stores like Penningtons, and they sell doughty stuff. I have now gotten rid of the old junk and now if I buy anything it will be in proper style for years to come. I also make sure it fits properly and if it doesn't then I'm getting it altered. No more crap! I want stuff that is either going to make me look like a drag queen or try to make me look like I can pass in public, one or the other. I will never purge again, I am getting ready to go hard and not take my foot off the gas!

[gabimartini]

Although it is a natural, and sometimes recurring phenomenon, purging is never a good idea. Because CDing will always know where you live! ;) And when it knocks on your door again, you'll end up buying everything back. So, do yourselves a favor, and don't give in to the urge to purge. Just choose a different hiding spot!!!

[CandyDarling]

Its just So embarrasing !

[MarcyHunter]

Gone cottin choppin.

[darci.c]

Yes, I've done it, and regretted it every time. Now, my closet has two sides. Right rack are guy's clothes, and on the left side are the girls.

If anyone I know or am dating at the time ever gets a look in there, I say nothing. They usually fill in the blanks that they're leftovers from an ex, or that I'm seeing someone currently and she parks a lot of her wardrobe at my apartment. None have suspected that they're actually MINE.

It works and I don't ever have to worry about hiding anything I own from company.

[Elana]

I've purged once in my life, back when i was around 12, i swore not to dress up again, but like a lot of the girls said here it is always a part of me. I didnt dress for about 5 years, but the thoughts of dressing always lingered. Till i was about 18 then stressed out one day before my DMV driving test i put on one of my cousin's old green satin dresses. I always remember the feeling of putting that dress almost 10+ years ago. I felt alive, and felt great, the silky skirts and tight bodice of the dress was luxurious =) something that i've been suppressing looking back that i shouldn't have repressed. Ever since then i've been dressing and never purged. Anyways i spent a ton of money on all the girly stuff i have now, dresses, tops, skirts, wigs, shoes, etc etc..... so yea i regretted doing that purge back then, of course i discovered that CD is a part of myself, and cant just be shutoff simply like a switch.

[melaniecd34]

Oh yes, I have been there and done that> If you get the urge. Take a walk, have a coffee and think about it. Deep down inside you know that it will be a mistake. This is a part of you, not just a phase. Once I realized that i never thought about purging again.

[DanaR]

I purged once, when I was 12. After that, I didn't see anything wrong with it. I kept it to myself. It was many years later that I started going out.

[mandi-panda]

Personally I've never done a purge... I almost did once when I made my big move across country, I couldn't think of a safe way to get everything handled by the movers... In the end I put everything in a huge moving box, double wrapped it, and shipped it to a friend on the mainland. I was glad he hadn't opened the box and I'm pretty sure he was clueless as to why I shipped a box to him instead of just letting the movers take care of everything.

[ohio27]

Yes I have thrown my panties out several times and some other thing that I wish I still had. Every time I moved or started dating a new girl .

[Krististeph]

Did this twice- and it turned me into a pack-rat: I hardly through anything away now- so now i have to go back the other way so i don't become a hoarder. no more purging.

[Erica Marie]

I know what u have been through. Multiple times I have pitched cloths, shoes and everything that goes with it in fear of others finding out only to purchase all new things again. Finally I was reunited with my high school sweetheart ofter almost 25 years, after a year of dating I figured it would be best if I just told her, it took some courage but I did and I am glad. It took some time for her to get used to the idea, but its who I am and she accepts me for that. My only words of advice is be yourself.

[Kaylyn81]

Yep, many times. When I was in my teens and early twenties, I owned mostly underclothes so it wasn't that big of a deal. In my late twenties I bought lots of jeans, shoes, and tshirts that I spent a lot on - and getting rid of them felt like cutting out a piece of myself. I threw them all in the trash just before I turned thirty and I said I was finished with it all.

.......Then I bought more clothes and shoes. The next time, I was sensible enough to donate them at least. I did that at the end of 2011. Now it is almost March and I have recently bought more shoes, jeans, and tshirts yet again. I would like to think that if I feel the need to purge in the future, I will just store them somewhere else and so still have them when (not if) I want to dress again. Lesson learned the hard way.

[Helen Grandeis]

Gave my stuff to the TG SUPPORT GROUP in Grand Rapids last July

[Glenda58]

I've purged so many times in my life I have lost track. The last time I was living alone and had a full walk-in closet and 2 dressers full. When I got married again I had to get rid of it all. So my new wife could use the closet. I had cloths from Norstroms, 40 pair of heels and bras and panties from every high end store in Michigan. Do I reget it? YES I love my wife but I also love dressing up and going out which I don't do much of now.

[Starshastar]

ive done it few times and also like most i regret every single time. but once i gave my exgirlfriend all my clothes cause i was moving in with a new girlfriend who didnt know starsha lmao... and once i had family throw away my clothes in highschool and then they never talked to me about never even brought it up in conversation can someone say denial lmao.

[Amy Hepker]

To many times every time I thought it would make a difference in a relationship, Wrong

[Ally 2112]

I have way to many times i think now the money i have wasted !!!.The last time was 5 yrs ago what was i thinking ??.Well i have vowed to never do it again im happy where i am at ,or try to be

[~Joanne~]

I don't even like to think about all the times I have purged. They are way too many and the ghosts of heels past still haunt me to this day.

[elizabethamy]

as a late starter, i'm also a late purger. but i hope to make up for it by learning quickly. still mourning the loss of things that went in my big (and hopefully last and only) major purge. The "quitting" effect didn't even last a week. No point in it at all...total illusion.

[johanna.kitten]

as a late starter, i'm also a late purger. but i hope to make up for it by learning quickly. still mourning the loss of things that went in my big (and hopefully last and only) major purge. The "quitting" effect didn't even last a week. No point in it at all...total illusion.

Yeah, did - many of times, It just does not go away. Next minute I'll be there again, missing some 200 pieces. I am over that now. From now on, all that goes in the bin has to be officially classified as drabs. I had a go at them horrible thingys some days back and now there are not much left.

/Johanna at wannabegirl dot co dot uk

[Maddy B]

Oh yeah, too many times. Always regret it later.

[CarlaC71]

Oh, gosh, how many times i've purged my things, but i always end up getting more elaborate, like one irl mentioned, you get in a relationship, you think it's a phase that's passed, and then you return to it, i'd like to have all my old stuff back, i'm sure i'll purge again some day, and go through it all over! lol :o

[randomperson]

Several times. But I never had anything but a shitload of panties.

[ArleneRaquel]

After all of my purging I have deeply regretted iy. The last time was early 2004 or late 2003. Never again.:2c:

[STACY B]

Someone threw all my stuff away i would be naked ,,, An ya dont want to see that ! :doh: :o :o :eek:

[Jocelyn Rose]

I would think if you were contemplating getting rid of all your stuff you could donate it to a shelter. That way some good could come out of it. Just throwing it out would be quite a waste.

[Julie Martin]

Many times. Usually takes 6 months to a year to sink in, then a couple more years before I buy new stuff! You'd think I'd learn lol!

[ChristineReid]

I did a 2 or 3 times up to the age of 25 or 30. Since then I've just accumulated a huge stash in the 'man' loft (reference to Michael Macintyre a Brit comedian who has a great set about the loft being the man's domain - wonderfully ironic in my case). I do regret getting rid of one pair of shoes in particular - but got so many more pairs now that it really doesn't matter anyway. Anyhow - don't believe in regrets...

[sissylisa]

I would think if you were contemplating getting rid of all your stuff you could donate it to a shelter. That way some good could come out of it. Just throwing it out would be quite a waste.

Good post. That's what I've been doing for the past few years, prob made a purge every 6months or so. Not a lot but it soon adds up. Seems I'm trapped in that cycle for the time being. Oh well.

[RachealCD]

I just went through a purge myself. It has been a while (almost 2 years) since I last dressed up and in that time I lost about 30 pounds and nothing I had fit! Luckily, when I mentioned to my wife that I would like to dress up again she and I went through all my clothes and makeup and got rid of everything that seemed to big, outdated or to old to use. The next day we went on a shopping spree and I got a few outfits and new shoes! This weekend we are shopping for makeup and possibly a new wig (or two).

[CarlaC71]

Did it again just a few months ago, had a female frin for a long time who wanted to take the next step, so I purged away everything, and she blew me off....just went out today and bought 3 new outfits, not even embarrassed standing in line this time, going out tonite again first time in 3 months, more nervous than usual though....

[mykhelee]

I have done several complete purges over the years, always swearing to never purge again...the last purge was because of a move and limited luggage space....sigh
Khelli

[Rebecca Star]

Thrown out, discarded, given away, donated you name it I've done it!

However CDing is much like a drug. No matter how many times you do a geographical to try and put some distance between you and the monkey on your back, just like purging, it returns. If I've learnt anything in life you can't escape living with yourself.

[Anise Lectum]

I did it once when I was growing up. From what it sounds like the collection of items I had was comparatively small -- it could fit in a small drawer -- but I'm not sure I regret doing it. It gave me space to think about things without worrying that somewhat else would stumble upon it.

That space, I think has been important for me figuring out who exactly I am.

[Tara D. Rose]

Yes I have. I did it one major time back in 1997. Then it all came back so strongly in 2010 after I told my current wife what I once "USED" to do. So I'm back with her encouragement, and I cannot stop now or ever again. I remember I threw out hundreds of $$ worth of everything. I wish I had it all back now. I threw it all in a corner dumpster 50 miles away. I wish I had just donated it all to goodwill though. I guess we all do this at some point or the other. I cannot speak for anyone else even though it does seem to be the norm for purging, is out of shame and guilt, and of not understanding who we were way back when we threw it all away. There was no internet way back then. Maybe I would have been online and could have learned that I wasn't all of the horrors that I thought I was.
I wanted so much to be a good person inside, I really was, but when all alone like that and of those memories, I thought I was a sick monster. After that purge, the urge continued to haunt me everyday for years. I fought it every minute of everyday for so long. The pressures of fighting back these strong desires, caused me to have a short fuse sometimes, with so many other problems in the mix of things, like missing the children the ex wife took away, and not letting me see them, and paying her a lot of money each week and having practically nothing left, and with so much pressure on my job, I found it so hard to hold my temper, which later I regretted.
I really didn't realize back then that it was what I was fighting so hard inside and sub conciousley, that I needed to be Tara. I do know now that I will not ever purge the things I have now. I have thousands of $$ worth of womenly stuff.

[AndreaSC]

Ahhhh, "THE PURGE", I have done it and REGRETTED it every time!! I can't say that I WON'T do it again, but one NEVER knows! :(

[Deanna Jeanine]

Ahhhh, "THE PURGE", I have done it and REGRETTED it every time!! I can't say that I WON'T do it again, but one NEVER knows! :(

Too many times, but hopefully last fall was the LAST time. I'm getting too old to start over again...and again...and again

[BLUE ORCHID]

Rule no. 1 Never Ever purge!

Rule no. 2 If you feel that you must purge, See Rule no. 1 again !!!

[johanna.kitten]

Purging - by all means, every time I wear something not femme it goes in the bin, and me being this wild chick - i even kept the long burlesque skirt and corset from London that the Thailand police found me in... sleeping in some mud pile two hours drive away from my hotel. I kept it all and is now going to pick them up from the cleaners, however fooked they are.

/Johanna - www.wannabegirl.co.uk - watch this space

[emmicd]

there's a term for this! it's called purging and it is a cruel initiation rite to being transgendered and a crossdresser.
i've done it many times and i have always regretted it but i must admit that at least i donated the clothes to good will.
i would never throw them away.

emmi

[Beverley Sims]

I purge all the time too.
I only have 12 inches of wardrobe space for mens clothes and 56 inches for Beverley.
I have told her she has to get rid of some of it. She doesn't listen tho'.

[Krististeph]

Once, in 1985. Fortunately, i did not have all that much. But i learned from it, as tough as it was. You cannot get rid of yourself. It's funny, i'm really kind of a chicken when it comes to crossdressing, but the few times i've been 'caught' or seen, hey, this is who i am, and woe be to those who try to harm me or those with me... we may be sissies, but we are also guys, and you can only push so far--

my first and only purge- it was a betrayal to myself, and it pissed me off. Never again.

(doesn't apply to donations of stuff too small to not my style) :-)

rookie Crossdressers: if you think you have to purge- send your stuff to a CD friend or girl friend. when the storm passes (it will very quickly) you get to be yourslf again!