Girl Greeting

[Sometimes Steffi]

There was a post sometime back about the smile greeting girls give other girls and the nod greeting that guys give other guys.

The first time I went out in girl mode among the general public was at the Maryland Renaissance Festival. There must have been tens of thousands of people there, but very few even gave me a second look.

However, a fair number of girls smiled at me, and I just smiled right back. Since I couldn't do makeup very well at that time (still can't), the look that I was going for was "plausibility deniability" in that many people are in costume, and I'm just wearing a costume of the opposite sex.

Anyhow, I interpreted the smiles as being clocked, kind of a subtle acknowledgement of "I know your secret, but I appreciate that you're trying". It wasn't until I read the greeting thread that I thought that I might just be getting a standard girl greeting.

Now I try to supress the nod to guys, and give and respond to the girl greeting, no matter how I am presenting. I'm not sure if I missed them all before, but I'm getting a lot of girl greetings when I'm in male made and I love it.

[Sarah Doepner]

It seems that men do their best to avoid eye contact, maybe it's some primal territorial thing, but it's frustrating. I like the way women are looking at other people all the time. It seems that part of it may be a desire to connect with and expand their community and that appeals to me. I'm much stronger and more confident when I know I have others there who are not threatened by my smile.

[Haley Heather]

It seems that men do their best to avoid eye contact, maybe it's some primal territorial thing, but it's frustrating.

It's about confrontation, a 'challenge' , wild instinct, spend some time looking dogs in the eye and you’ll see that this is not just a human phenomena.

[Debglam]

I love cycling and sometimes it is an absolute joy to be riding. When you come across another cyclist and it is a woman, 9 times out of 10 a big smile given will get a big smile back. When it is a guy, you usually get the "Lance Armstrong I'm A More Serious Rider Than You" face. It is a shame that their masculinity gets in the way of joy, pure and simple joy.

[Persephone]

I think I did a post about "girl smiles" and male head nods not too long ago, although others probably have as well.

I've found it easy to drop into the pattern of doing "girl smiles," which, in drab mode, sometimes can have funny results. You cross paths with a woman and do a woman-to-woman acknowledgment smile, she responds and then gets a puzzled look like "did I just smile at that guy???"

For me, the hard one is getting rid of the guy nod. I was raised in the South, where men frequently nod to one another, and I'm having a really hard time not doing it when en femme.

[Claire Cook]

There is no doubt that when I am out and about, the biggest kick I get (aside from wearing the clothes I want to!) is the acknowledgement smiles I get from women. I don't know and don't care if they read me ... just that mutual smile and the implied "we have something in common" -- even if it's just clothes -- is enough to make my day. Steffi, I'll bet the smiles you were getting were in the same vein. Oh -- one other thing I have noticed -- women seem to notice my boobs almost as much as men do. I don't know if that means "they're shaped kinda funny" or "has she got falsies" or "hmm .. a guy with boobs" (or maybe just "lookin' good hon"?), but it's kinda cool.

[Christie ann]

When you come across another cyclist and it is a woman, 9 times out of 10 a big smile given will get a big smile back. When it is a guy, you usually get the "Lance Armstrong I'm A More Serious Rider Than You" face.

I so totally agree. Happens on every ride

[PretzelGirl]

I find it is a great experiment at work. If I smile and greet everyone I pass, the ladies will generally respond with a greeting and I get grunts or greetings from guys. The one that I find most interesting is this one lady that has a beautiful smile constantly but when I say high, she nods so hard it looks like she should get whiplash. but the ladies that I greet are ones that I start having more conversations with. The experiment is a success!

[noeleena]

Hi.

Yes im one whos replyed on this ,

This will depend on are they friends or people in the street male & female ,

Most who i know who are male who are friiends will look me in the eyes . & yes a few will smile tho a few i know wont can not & wont look me in the face. some males are down right rude thier demeaner is yea well...yet at other times theyll grunt a word or two .

Many of the women well i get smiles & a hi , some we talk yea its cool. some well are not interested & they look away. or down. so im not bothered as i mutter cant even say hi. depends on the person yet i say hi to strangers coming through the Village & get a good response so you never know .

Oh i will relate a detail ,saturday i went to the gypsy faire & some women from another town from a camara club & i know all of them not a one was even interested in saying hi & this is the 2nd time now they know me as i went to one of thier meetings so theres no reason why, so as i see it im a leper i saw 5 from the group ,on sat, the first time i met them i sort of had an idear i would not be to wellcome so when i saw them the 2nd time they just turned thier backs on me & 4 of the men did the same even tho i said hi to them they just did not wont me around them. so there you go & i was going to join thier group .. he he no way.yet iv met too many people & not had that,

Now this was neat, i did talk to one new woman at the Faire who emailed me to day on Facebook so that was a surprise .
so there you go.
I try to be friendly to people so its just as well i have a lot of friends all around.

...noeleena...

[Annie D]

Nodding is a hard habit to break but dressed as a male or female smiling is so much more fun and received quite positively and I have made a conscious effort to eliminate the nod from any type of greeting.

My son came home from college for a short visit several month ago and told me that he had learned the origin of the military salute. He shared with me that when knights traveling on the road met one another they would raise the shield covering their face of their helmut armor so that the other could identify them. Thus it became the salute. Now I am allowing my imagination proceed that the nod could be the "non-knight" male person lowering his head as a sign of submission, somewhat like a nod while the "non-knight female person curtsied and smiled to the person they are greeting.

I like the idea and from now on I think that no matter how I am dressed I will smile and curtsy as a form of greeting! I wonder what kind of looks that would cause????

[Jolene]

Seems around where I live, unless a person knows you a Hello or a Hi is rare.
Most people male or female just are not that friendly anymore.