Lately my emotions seem to be all over the place.

[Melissa Jill]

Most of the time Im perfectly happy, but even in these happy times I still find myself crying a lot over stupid inane things. Like earlier I was just reading about cayenne pepper and just burst into tears.
I have no idea why it keeps happening. Ive always been a bit emotional, but in the last few weeks its gotten a lot stronger.
I don't really, err...get it. I can't think of how to word my question, just a general sort of "what?"

[Ash Leland]

Hm....when did this start? Is it ever present? Like, always lurking in the background of your mind even during happy moments, or sudden, unexpected bursts?

It is spring...that may or may not have anything to do with it. I've been experiencing something similar. Could be because my psychiatrist is trying out these anti-depressants on me that just aren't working...

[Melissa Jill]

Yea its always there, just my reaction to things seems to vary greatly.
Im not on any medications or hormones or anything.

Edit:
Like, Im fine at the moment because theres nothing to set me off.

[kimdl93]

Is this a recent thing? or have you always responded this way?

[Melissa Jill]

Its hard to say. I re-discovered my femininity as it were at the end of last year, so before then I would always try and push my emotions down. I guess if I had to answer I would say it was a recent thing. I learnt to let myself go more, but in the last few weeks they seem to be accelerating by themselves.

[kimdl93]

Well, do you feel this growing emotionality is becoming a problem? In terms of being a problem, does it cause you embarrassment, difficulties at work or problems in relationships? If not, then I wouldn't worry too much.

[Melissa Jill]

No, not yet. But it just seems weird and I wondered if anyone had any theories on why is happening or if anyone else had gone through anything similar.

[James Kaon]

OK, I really dont wanna sound like some kind of therapist wannabe, believe me im not! But it does sound like you are not happy about something which you can't identify and therefore you use other situations/circumstances to allow that emotional status to have some voice. I find I cry at films too easily - I get so involved in them and I almost laugh at myself because I realise that its just giving me an opportunity to express something I have not figured out (I think I suffer from depression but who knows?)

You also mention it has been in the last few weeks - so maybe something someone has said or something you have read has pressed a button subconsciously.

Hope you can figure it out, but also, dont worry too much if you cant - crying is not an unhealthy thing I dont think. Or getting emotional - its just a way of expressing no?

J

[kimdl93]

I'll leave the theories to someone else. My only advice is to be watchful. If this starts to be a problem then consider visiting with a physician.

[Jannine]

Hi Melissa,
I too have had those feelings lately; I have just recently come out to my partner, and this has caused huge emotional upheaval for both of us. Perhaps with you there may possibly be a touch of inner joy that you are not able to identify or describe, related to rediscovering yourself. Sure, it was a while back, but tears can be hidden for so long, you know. I too am a slave to my emotions, and I too have felt the pain that I have caused other people, for so many years, because I had'nt known why I was me, nor why I wanted to dress. I have felt such remorse and guilt for what I have done that my latest denial period lasted 5 years. As I write to you now I have to wipe the tears from my cheeks, because I also feel an intense lonliness that I cannot describe, I dont know why. I know its related to my femme self.
But I feel for you, I hope that you have someone whom you can confide in, and if not find somebody. You look like a young lass with everything going for you, and I wish you well. Just understand that you will never walk alone; things may be hard for you now, but with the unfolding of the years, your view will become clearer.

Jannine.X chin up!

[Melissa Jill]

Thanks everyone.
Talking to someone else who knows a little more about my life they reckon I might be depressed and that I should go to the doctors.

[Alice Torn]

Melissa, Sometimes it is biological, and chemical. Magnesium, and B vitamin deficiencies, can make it worse. Exercise, helps. Midlife crisis. Depression, is so real in my life, since teenageer years. I am 56 now. Unresolved sorrow, grief, abuse issues, family issues. I feel sad,often, too, especially when i see happy couples, hear a really happy, beautiful song sung, or a beautiful lady. sSome of us have had very trtagic lives, full of isolartion, or abuse, being misunderstood, and with no close friends. A support group of any type can help.

[Phoebe P.]

Sounds like depression. Do you ever have trouble getting out of bed? You said you feel weepy. I would definitely discuss it with an MD. I felt the same way. The economy has really gotten to me. I'm self-employed and have had a tough time. Talk to your doctor. Life is rough lately and there's no shame in admitting you need a little help -- prescriptions or someone to talk to. I'm not into therapy, so my doctor has really helped me. If you ever need anything send me a PM! It'll get better!

http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/detecting-depression

I checked off basically all of the symptoms.

[Rachel Mari]

So... are you reading my mind or what?

I'm feeling many of the same emotions. The feeling I could just cry (eyes start to burn) for the some of the same reasons stated, the sense of lonliness, or maybe more so one of loss, all happen at anytime and anyplace. All of things can set it off. A song, lying in bed, driving down the road, you name it, except when the kids are having fun.

My wife of 22 years is out of town for work and has been since mid Feb. She'll be back sometime in April. And there is a change coming into our marriage that I don't know which way it'll go. I think the emotions and the marriage trouble is somewhat related but not fully, because I was feeling many of the emotions before some of the issues where coming up.

Glad I'm in therapy. She thinks I'm depressed and I agree. But I'm not depressed all the time and I do feel joy sometimes.

A very interesting thread and one I'll follow.

[Melissa Jill]

I have trouble getting out of bed, but I always have done. The down periods are usually triggered by things that remind me Im single, or that I have no job, etc.
But sometimes it seems to come on by itself and then Ill switch back to happy later on for seemingly no reason.

Originally I thought this was related to my crossdressing which is why its in MTF, maybe it should be moved elsewhere though.

[kimdl93]

Melissa, with each added bit of information, this does indeed sound like depression. I'd encourage you to seek out some counseling - at least a consult with your physician. They can help you work your way through it one way or another.

To the poster who noted they aren't depressed all the time - that's true for lots of people with depression and especially true for those with bi-polar disorder.

[Ash Leland]

Melissa, with each added bit of information, this does indeed sound like depression. I'd encourage you to seek out some counseling - at least a consult with your physician. They can help you work your way through it one way or another.

To the poster who noted they aren't depressed all the time - that's true for lots of people with depression and especially true for those with bi-polar disorder.

On that note-

If you seek psychiatric help, be patient with your provider. It's takes awhile to find the right treatment, and even things that work fine for awhile may not work forever. A lot of people have very unique things informing their condition (both psychological and biochemical) and finding what works for you will be a process. I've been on and off treatment my whole life and I only recently found a therapist who is doing what works for me (the meds are still hit and miss. they always were).

[Kate Simmons]

You're doing fine my friend. Getting in touch with one's own feelings is not easy by any stretch and not for the faint of heart.:)

[VioletJourney]

It's my opinion as a first year psych student that you might be showing symptoms of a mental disorder. It's OK - nearly everyone has one to some extent - but you might want to look into getting some help from a therapist. It's probably not even related to your CDing, to be honest.