So Effing sick of LABELS!

[MichelleOBrien]

As the title says, I'm friggin sick of labels. Am I a crossdresser, TV, TG, or a TS? Am I homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, trisexual, or asexual? If two men both wear lipstick and kiss each other, does it make the lesbians?

For crying out freaking loud! WHY do we feel the need to label ourselves so concisely? Here's a label for ya... Human!

Unless you're a dog, in which case... woof woof-woof ruff bark.

Seriously. Can we get away from the labels, and all the stigma involved and just LIVE LIFE? Just... live. That's all I wanna do. Who's with me?

[Amanda22]

Good post. When I first accepted myself as a crossdresser, being diagnosed as a "transwoman" by therapists was helpful to me because it meant I wasn't alone; there was a group to which I belonged. Now that this concept is very solid in my self-identity, I find that labels simply get in the way. Labels in general just tend to restrict the members of whatever group we apply them to. Perhaps they help others understand us, but it's my opinion that we tend to overlap boundaries of multiple labels.

[Persephone]

Great post, Michelle!

I'm on-board and have been for quite some time. Labels are for jars of pasta sauce!


http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y53/sandylewiscares/PastaSauce.jpg

Hugs,
Persephone.

[MichelleOBrien]

yes, some labels can help by showing we're not alone. But my problem comes in where everybody needs to be that unique snowflake in the snowstorm and have 50 different labels for something when 25 of those are so similar, they might as well be considered the same. There's a stigma attached to every label. "Transwoman" isn't so bad, but when somebody applies the labels tranny, transgendered, transsexual, etc. society applies a stigma.

There's a saying somewhere that names have power. So do labels. Names and Labels have the power to elevate or reduce your social standing. And even the most hermitized of us on this site are worried to some degree about social standing, because we're seeking recognition by other people. If somebody moved to Maryland with the name of James Stalin, the first thought through 80% of educated people would be "Communist leader of Russia". Now James will be looked at through tainted lenses because of his last name. So would anybody with the last name of Kennedy. Even if they're not related, people apply what they know to people they don't know.

And if a group of people only know "trans" to relate to Rocky Horror Picture Show... there's no way they'll believe we're otherwise normal, productive members of society. I realize I'm waxing philosophical and psychological at 4 AM, but something in here has to make people realize that labels=stigma=treatment from other people based on possible misconceptions.

And sadly, even being a member of a webpage can make those labels come about because people by nature associate things in groups.

[Amelia]

But I have this fabulous label maker and a need for order! :D

[MichelleOBrien]

But I have this fabulous label maker and a need for order! :D

:thumbup:

Well, you're welcome to come and label/order my computer desk.

[Alisa]

Unfortunately the whole labeling, classification, higher cognitive function thing is what separates us from other species... what makes us human. It's a gift... and we just can't help ourselves... so I guess it can also be a curse.


As the title says, I'm friggin sick of labels. Am I a crossdresser, TV, TG, or a TS? Am I homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, trisexual, or asexual? If two men both wear lipstick and kiss each other, does it make the lesbians?

For crying out freaking loud! WHY do we feel the need to label ourselves so concisely? Here's a label for ya... Human!

Unless you're a dog, in which case... woof woof-woof ruff bark.

Seriously. Can we get away from the labels, and all the stigma involved and just LIVE LIFE? Just... live. That's all I wanna do. Who's with me?

[noeleena]

Hi.

so then how do i get to know you , who you are or what you are . how much info are you prepeared to give out, just put my name on the net & then tell me what you see & can find out about this kid . it comes down to naming of who we are i have no idear if your a girl . female .woman male man or ....

So if i say im a woman will you belive me & i worked in the building trade im 63 been married have 3 grown up adults & 8 grandkids .Iv used only one word to decribe my self . = woman, tho iv not in this post said very much else about my self so how then will you decribe who i am with out those lables ,

so how would you suggest we go about this
at least some lables will give you a better idear wont they ,

i have about 15 at the least to tell you who i am .& about who this woman is ,

By the sound of your post id say your a male, with out looking at any if there is info about who you are,

Heres a difference iv not had any issuses that i would say have been leveled at me as youv said in your 3rd part of your post .

Ill have to use ...some lables . when i was on T V , 2 stations had interviews for papers & the net Nation wide i talked about what it was like for me as a kid growing up & then liveing as a woman , i used Transfemale who is a woman , Intersex , & androgynous woman , now for all intents & purposes most people i work with , know & are friends with , accept im just a woman with a male back ground & there are some who wont to know the nuts & bolts of who i am, so the lables are very much needed. i have no stigma leveled at me & im very well known. any way just my thoughts .

I prefer not to use labels & yet if we dont how do i know any thing about you as i said or me for that matter & as we will never meet how do we over come this ,we use words to explain who what & where , take the labels away ill never know will i .

...noeleena...

[Gaby2]

Great post, Michelle!

I'm on-board and have been for quite some time. Labels are for jars of pasta sauce!
...
Hugs,
Persephone.
Well, I never thought of me as a jar.
Up to now that is.
And I don't like the thought of being called "pasta sauce".
But a pot of jam, you know the one with lots of sugar and not too much fruit... that doesn't sound bad at all!
Gaby - feeling a bit potty!

[sissystephanie]

I am with you, Michelle! We are all humans, and that is the only label we need!!

[Kate Simmons]

It's a case Of: "Sticks and stones..." really. Some folks need labels to function, many of us don't. Simple as that really.:)

[danielle.cd]

the way i see it is : labels are so that the others that dont understand our ways and things we do or dont do , can wrap there mind around it and go oooohhh so u like this or that and them , when alot of the time they dont really care anyway.

[Joanne f]

The problem is the whole reason why we are here is because of that big label right at the top of the page , CROSS DRESSERS.COM

[Carol Elizabeth]

The only labels that I go by are:

I'm ME!

I would like to get to know YOU!

So I agree with the original post - beyond that, I really don't care for labels either.

CE

[JulieK1980]

The biggest problem with labels is that unless we are applying the label to our self, it's used strictly as a way to prejudge an entire group.

[gretchen2]

I think labels are important as a whole. If we did not have labels we would find ourselves in the wrong place at the wrong time. What if the Klan had no label and they through a party and you went. Wouldn't it be nice if they had a label so you didn't dragged behind a truck in the middle of the night. That is of course an extreme example, but there are many to choose from. We need labels as sad as that may sound it is a reality. Labels define who we are.

[Sara Jessica]

Unfortunately the whole labeling, classification, higher cognitive function thing is what separates us from other species... what makes us human. It's a gift... and we just can't help ourselves... so I guess it can also be a curse.

It's no curse.

Subscription to a gender continuum theory means you are dealing with a nearly infinite points of being. Yet most of those can be captured within a half-dozen or so broader labels. We are not all the same, simple as that.

If someone engages me in a discussion about the TG experience (which happens quite often), the conversation would end abruptly if I simply say "I'm me" or "I'm human". Instead, knowing where I reside in the continuum allows me to convey my experiences appropriately. Therefore, I really have no issue with labels.

[Cynthia Anne]

I say can the labels! Because it's the only way you know what's inside! Nothing worse than opening up a can of beans and eating them then you can't find the dog food and the can of beans are still there!

[Anne Elizabeth]

So Michelle Obrien Please tell me about yourself, who you are?, what you do for a living? your family?, tell us about your hobbies and your likes and dislikes?

My point is that we all complain about labels but, in all these descriptions to explain many of the above questions I ask, will define or come out as a label of some kind. For me when someone tells me that they are a crossdresser I understand where they think or define their self at that point in their live. Same as if some one tells me they are a potter at one of the art shows I attend then, I know what type of medium they work in. Then the conversation may move to thrown, slab, ceramic, raku, pit fired and on and on. The fact is we all classify others in labels it helps us to know where people reside in their life at that particular time. As when I was in high school I was a wood worker, electronics hobbyist, drama production, long distance runner, and many others. Never did I ever classify my self as an artist however today I am a transsexual, wood turning artist, husband, father grandfather, son, son in law, christian. It really helps me know who I define myself as who I really am. Where as, if I just said I was human, all I know is that I am a mammal assumed to by bipedal( for some this won't work on offense intended) and yet that still doesn't really tell if I dwell on land or in the water.
So for me I need labels! I need to know who I am. Also because that helps me understand why I feel the way I feel and I am quite happy to be able to define my self as a male to female transsexual. Sometimes I have felt that If I put a label to why I want to dress as a women and want to be a woman that by not putting a label to it I was actually denying to myself who I really am.

[MichelleOBrien]

I think labels are important as a whole. If we did not have labels we would find ourselves in the wrong place at the wrong time. What if the Klan had no label and they through a party and you went. Wouldn't it be nice if they had a label so you didn't dragged behind a truck in the middle of the night. That is of course an extreme example, but there are many to choose from. We need labels as sad as that may sound it is a reality. Labels define who we are.

Yeah, but think about the Klan's purpose. I grew up in the deep south, so I know for a fact that it was the eradication of(and I use these as extreme exampls and mean no offense by them) n*ggers, f*gs, ch*nks, and jews. All based on labels. So while what you're saying has merit, go a step farther and the Klan wouldn't exist.

[Anne2345]

I am who and what I am. I accept it, and I love it. If I am going to be labeled, I choose to label myself. I hereby label myself the same as my chosen name - I label myself "Anne." For me, that says it all. It encompasses that which I am. Case closed.

That being said, labels are an inescapable fact of life, and bring order to what otherwise may be a chaotic mess of ideas and concepts. Although labels can clearly be used in hurtful, spiteful and negative ways, as Anne Elizabeth so eloquantly stated in her reply, labels can and do have positive value, and if used productively, are necessary.

[MichelleOBrien]

So Michelle Obrien Please tell me about yourself, who you are?, what you go do for a living? your family?, tell us about your hobbies and your likes and dislikes?

My point Is that we all complain about labels but in all these descriptions to explain many of the above questions I ask will define or come out as a label of some kind. For me when someone tells me that thery are a crossdresser I understand where they think or define their self at that point in their live. Same as if some one tells me they are a potter at one of the art show I attend then, I know what type of medium they work in. Then the conversation may move to thrown, slab, ceramic, raku, pit fired and on and on. The fact is we all classify others in labels it helps us to know where people reside in their life at that particular time. As when I was in high school I was a wood worker, electronics hobbyist, drama production, long distance runmnner, and many others. Never did I ever clasify my self as an artist however today I am a transexual, woodturning artist, husband, father grandfather, son, son in law, christian. It really helps me know who I define myself as who I really am. Where as, if I just said I was human, all I know is that I am a mamal assumed to by bipedal( for some this won't work on offence intended) and yet that still doesn't really tell if I dwell on land or in the water.
So for me I need labels! I need to know who I am. Also because that helps me understand why I feel the way I feel and I am quite happy to be able to define my self as a male to female transexual. Sometimes I have felt that If I put a label to why I want to dress as a women and want to be a woman that by not putting a label to it I was actually dening to myself who I really am.

Okay, *this* makes sense and is presented in a way I sadly can't refute... thank you.

[Cristi]

As the title says, I'm friggin sick of labels....Seriously. Can we get away from the labels, and all the stigma involved and just LIVE LIFE? Just... live. That's all I wanna do. Who's with me?

:thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup:

Where do I sign? I guess that makes me a 'follower'. Great, one more label.


So Michelle Obrien Please tell me about yourself, who you are?, what you go do for a living? your family?, tell us about your hobbies and your likes and dislikes?

My point Is that we all complain about labels but in all these descriptions to explain many of the above questions I ask will define or come out as a label of some kind. For me when someone tells me that thery are a crossdresser I understand where they think or define their self at that point in their live. .

Granted, but like all things good in MODERATION. The issue is that there are so many people who see ONLY the label. It becomes not the beginning of a conversation, but the entire definition of who you are. You can nit-pick this down to a cellular level (every noun is a label), but I think the intent of the original post is frustration with the label being used as a definition of who you are, not as a starting point for a conversation.

[Julogden]

No, we can't get away from labels. It's human nature to define and categorize everything and everyone, simply a fact of life. Labels let us communicate with more precision. If it wasn't for labels, how would you have found this site? ;)

Carol

[Lorileah]

OK we are in agreement then no labels. Got that all you Queens out there? No labels. You too all you persons of faith or color. We can't have labels because you would be categorized and then what would happen? You might actually associate with someone similar to you because they have similar ideas and thoughts. Stand up and fight "the man!" oh wait that 's a label.

In essence I agree, that labels can carry a stigma. That being put in a box isn't a good thing. I hate being called certain things that are associated with the TG community. Why because I have ideas of how these labels should be so I am a labeler. But labels do have place. Transwomen are a group that really has many things in common and they should be able to be proud of that label. There are men who only like the clothes, there are men who are in our community as a fetish. Many here won';t want to be associated with that, the one's who take it all more seriously.


Stand on you soap box and tell the world. No more labels...well except if you do that you will labeled as a radical. I like that term for me...maybe you won't. but one characteristic of most "humans" is need for order and explanation. Thus labels.
I think I'll choose my own and therefore I will be in control. I will take a cue from Starbucks. I am a half gender, high profile, angry, disillusioned, confused, non-op, contrary presenting, non-passing, not needing to pass, transgendered person, with a little foam and cinnamon

[NicoleScott]

I agree. No more labels.
Now excuse me while I eat my two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed bun.

[AudreyTN]

im tired of labels too, but unfortunately they are a part of life.

[CherryZips]

Is it a problem with labels or a problem with the wrong label?

Labels are hugely important. Labels help us find out who we are and let others understand us. You are asking us to deny there are any patterns to behaviour on this spectrum.

If someone asks me about my sexual identity do I have to give them a paragraph of biography and ideas or do I give them a couple labels? If I give the paragraph they will more likely go with their assumptions. It also looks evasive and like I might be in denial.

I worry some of this anti label rhetoric is about avoiding responsibility and not accepting who you are.

Maybe we just need better labels.

[AllieSF]

I have no problems with labels. They help me get a quick idea about the person with whom I am talking or chatting. I don't let the labels give a negative connotation to the person. I let the person do that. Yes, labels can be used incorrectly. But then those people who do that would probably do so anyway, with or without labels. Most people use labels of all kinds to help orientate themselves to a conversation or situation. That helps their thought process and to be able to correctly respond to the topic at hand. If you are comfortable with who you are, labels shouldn't bother you. I bet that you use labels for all kinds of things, activities and people; blue collar, politicians, sports people, fishermen, golfers, intellectuals, etc.. You are just sensitive to the ones that may reflect on you. Toughen up your skin and ignore them if you want or need to.

[Cassandra Lynn]

You can vent all you want and most of us can agree that it is frustrating beyond belief, but as has been pointed out it has to happen to some extent.

2 weeks 2 months or 6 months from now there will be new folks finding the 'boards' and they will ask the same questions and they will need answers and they will get them and the cycle will continue. Keep in mind as well that for the greater whole of us, where we start and where we end are usually very different places, so the labels will change.

What causes the most frustration IN MY OPINION !! is that their are folks here who will not allow someone to call themselves what they want or feel they are, you know the same repeat offenders !! who will not !! preclude their statements with the common disclaimer "in my opinion' or "my viewpoint" etc, etc., or better yet just not reply at all.

Cassie

[GaleWarning]

Unfortunately the whole labeling, classification, higher cognitive function thing is what separates us from other species... what makes us human. It's a gift... and we just can't help ourselves... so I guess it can also be a curse.

The abilty to seek samenesses is what enables people to label things. We are all members of CD.com because of what we have in Common, not because of what divides us.
I have long been promoting the notion that we should all be celebrating our samenesses on this forum, instead of tormenting each other by arguing over the labels by which we seek to control ourselves and others.
Let us seek freedom to be ourselves and shun the little boxes full of tickey- tackey.

[Rianna Humble]

The only labels that I go by are:

I'm ME!

I would like to get to know YOU!

So I agree with the original post - beyond that, I really don't care for labels either.

CE

You can't be ME! I'm me!

Now let's get to know each other without labels:

Hi, I'm (sorry can't tell you that's a label), I come from (sorry can't tell you that would label me), I'm interested in (sorry can't tell you because we agreed we would not use labels), I spend my time (sorry can't tell you for fear of using labels). I would have mentioned that I prefer people to use the correct pronoun for me but for the fact that pronouns are labels so that's taboo (which is also a label, sorry).

Now tell em about yourself without mentioning your gender, your name, your interests, your occupation, your age, where you come from & so on.

I agree with one thing form the earlier posts which is that we should concentrate on what we have in common rather than what separates us. Now let's work out what we have in common without using labels. Oops, I'm back to square one.

[GaleWarning]

Let me help you, Rianna.
We are all people who like to wear the clothing usually associated with the opposite gender, or the SO of such a person.
Now isn't that a great way to go forward together?

[ReineD]

So Effing sick of LABELS!


I agree with the person who said that labels belong on cans. This is why, since we are using words and not cans, we should think of our descriptions as definitions and not labels. Or, we should think of our definitions as descriptions. Whichever one you like. lol

And since we don't communicate among ourselves through ESP, we can't possibly engage in any meaningful exchange of ideas without knowing the definitions of the words we choose to describe all the things, actions, feelings, and ideas that we are attempting to communicate.

I don't understand why you do not like to define who you are? I mean, if you are in a relationship, doesn't your partner want to know what your sexual orientation is, or if you think you might want SRS down the line? It doesn't really matter what word or combination of words you choose to communicate this, just as long as both of you understand the meaning behind the words at the end of the day. :)

[JulieK1980]

Perhaps we should label the labels?

Their are labels that are necessary like place names. There are labels that are useful like scientific/medical classifications. There are unnecessary labels that separate us into unneeded classes. Then there is the vague all encompassing "other" category that we can throw all the other labels in like, cans of green beans.


I don't understand why you do not like to define who you are? I mean, if you are in a relationship, doesn't your partner want to know what your sexual orientation is, or if you think you might want SRS down the line? It doesn't really matter what word or combination of words you choose to communicate this

To this, I think we ALL do label ourselves. However, we don't all agree on the textbook definition so it can become frustrating to have someone else try to pigeonhole us into a category based on their idea of what we are. Unfortunately there is very limited resources and information that allows us to accurately define ourselves as a whole.

[Marissa]

And yet another thread on the unhappiness of the multitude of labels being used and some great responses..some valid, some not. But we all have our own opinions as I'm sure this will end as mine :)

Even though some responses cover the area of labels as a part of life, I ask is the tone of being disgruntled about labels only within the topics of crossdressing/transgender as in this site?

I mean do you log off the site as unhappy because you were labeled a crossdresser, but have no issue if someone nicely ask "are you Italian?

I doubt anyone will get far by "I'm me and you are you" description.

So..good discussion..hope to see the same on the next thread of the same topic :)

[ReineD]

Jody, you forgot to quote the most important part of my sentence!


... just as long as both of you understand the meaning behind the words at the end of the day. :)

It stands to reason that as more people come to a common understanding of all the meanings behind the words (through self-searching and productive communication), then everything will become clear and everyone will know exactly what is meant by the descriptions.

[JulieK1980]

Jody, you forgot to quote the most important part of my sentence!



It stands to reason that as more people come to a common understanding of all the meanings behind the words (through self-searching and productive communication), then everything will become clear and everyone will know exactly what is meant by the descriptions.

I stand corrected. :) (and agree)

[VioletJourney]

I'd say that in this case labels are sort of like political stances; one might call themselves a "Liberal" or a "Democrat" but have Republican/Conservative beliefs in some cases, but it's easier to say "liberal" or "democrat" than to make some big speech about where you stand on each issue. So yeah, labels oversimplify, apply incorrect stereotypes, and aren't completely descriptive, but it's just easier with them.

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

Agree, sick and tired of hearing about labels. Damn have you ever seen a spare parts bay? Even then the labels change and when they fall off, sheeeesk what a problem that is. Maybe I should label my forehead with a tattoo so when I am dressed they know what I am trying to be but I hate being the center of attention. Maybe I should just sticky note it.

[Rianna Humble]

Let me help you, Rianna.
We are all label deleted who like to label deleted, or the label deleted of such a label deleted.
Now isn't that a great way to go forward together?

I think my version fits better with the general consensus of this thread about not using labels

[docrobbysherry]

So, I walk into a room filled with u, "non-labelers", and ask u all one question:

"Who r u?" And, rite on down the line u all say, "I'm ME.":eek:
Until I get to Rianna. Who says, "U can't be Me! I'm ME!":brolleyes:

I KNOW you'd ALL BE LYING, of course! NONE OF U IS ME!:Angry3:

[Lynn Marie]

Early on in my first adventures outside of my home as a crossdresser I met a beautiful woman, impeccably dressed, with a fabulous sense of style and grace at the club most of us hang out at. We got to talking and finally I asked "What are you?" I really didn't know. I was a little afraid that I might get some flak for asking such a question, but she very simply said, "I'm a gay man". I was intranced. How could she look so wonderful present herself so well? I loved the way she had no fear of labeling herself with that dreaded term "gay".

I also have no fear of identifying myself. I use labels to make myself understood. I like labels that help me understand better. I also am fully cognizant of the fact that there are many people who use labels to oppress others to make up for their own lack of testosterone and self esteem. I'm sorry for them. I can only wish them the maturity and grace of Charlotta the drag queen gay man with no fear.

[Cari]

I think labels are unavoidable; you almost have to claim one and take some responsibility for it.
I will always be labelled as a CD because of my actions, but in some tiny way I feel like I can control the stereotypes attached to that label.

What I find annoying is how within the community the labels cause so much friction.
To people outside the community there are only a few labels.

I spent like half my life trying to figure out where I belong.
When I found a label that seemed to fit I thought I was home. (You need something for that internet search)
What really happenned was that by finding that first label I openned a big can of acronym soup describing every variation imaginable.

I try to remember that Im part of a community under a very generic label.

[erickka]

Here Here! 'Nuff said. You said it all, Michelle! Unfortunately it will NEVER go away. It just seems to be that a stupid part of human nature feels that if is necsssary to assign EVERY damn thing some sort of a label.

[VeronicaMoonlit]

No, we can't get away from labels. It's human nature to define and categorize everything and everyone, simply a fact of life. Labels let us communicate with more precision. If it wasn't for labels, how would you have found this site? ;)

Carol

That! Labels are necessary to help us understand what we are talking about, for the most part.

Veronica

[Pythos]

Labels are important. It is however the ones that are incorrectly applied that mess everything up.

I don't really mind being called a crossdresser. It is the other labels connected to that I am not fond of. Labels like, Crazy, sick in the mind, pervert, sexual deviant, child mollester (yes I have seen someone on a fashion freedom site get called that), mentally challenged, and to a lesser extent, homosexual. That last one is only annoying because it is very inaccurate, but still causes women to turn away.

[Jilmac]

I can understand your disgust with labels, I think most of them are concocted out of fear of reality. However I describe myself as a crossdresser. I think it's more of a description than a label, sort of like when a person describes themself by the hobby or interest they pursue.

[PretzelGirl]

That! Labels are necessary to help us understand what we are talking about, for the most part.
Veronica

:thumbsup: Labels are part of our language. Must have them to communicate. One of our problems here seems to be that we are oversensitive to what we think is the wrong word being applied. If you apply a "label" to someone outside our group, they will probably say, "nah, not really". Here if you call someone transgender and they don't apply that term to themselves, then the heavens and the earth open up and the Kracken comes out and swallows half the group whole. We really need to be a lot less sensitive especially for a group that is seeking acceptance. It is hard to get acceptance from people outside our group if we argue terminology with them and get upset or offended about it. And judging from what I see here, it has to be happening.

[Amanda22]

We really need to be a lot less sensitive especially for a group that is seeking acceptance. It is hard to get acceptance from people outside our group if we argue terminology with them and get upset or offended about it. And judging from what I see here, it has to be happening.

Thank you for this comment! I agree completely. I have no problem with labels. In my opinion, they're necessary and helpful. If a person is offended by a label, then set them straight. This discussion falls in to the category of caring too much what others think. Call me TG, CD, trans-this, trans-that, weird, strange, f*cked-up, I just can't get enough emotion together to care.

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

Hell if you do not know who you are at the age one is, then I guess you need to label yourself so that you are reminded of who you are. I am realising that I am me so label me as "me". I do not conform to one label, I am a mixture of labels depending on my mood hence being me is of fluid, an aether, I conform to that which demands it, permeates it and resides within that till I see something else that allows me to be consumed with curiosity of that which I may decide to transition. Nah, as I grow to understand who I am, I see I am but of many labels that is "Me".

[Shananigans]

Alright, fine then be a giraffe.

[Byanca]

Labels make it to easier find what you are looking for. System of efficiency. It's why one arrange stuff in the store.

The labels are harmless. If there is a problem, it's the people using them.

A gun is just metal

A bible is just paper.

[Pythos]

Amanda,

What if those labels you stated at the end of your post were used to deny you a job, or remove you from one? How about used to have custody of your children taken, or to have a certificate you worked really really hard for revoked due to percieved mental instability?

These lables should be payed mind, and how they are used should also be paid attention to.

I dislike some of the lables because for the most part they are entirely one sided and used derisively.

"Sticks and stones my break my bones, but words will never hurt me" is such a fallacy. Why? Because words can be part of fear, and fear can lead to hate, and hate can lead to broken bones, or ruined lives. (yes I borrowed from Yoda on that one. :) )

[Bethany38]

I believe labels are like yin an yang, good and evil. It depends on the label and the context with which it is used. There are certain labels that should never be used to describe anyone. Some labels we use for endearment, some are used for hate. My point is labels will always be here for one purpose or another, We can only to destroy the negative ones through education of the populace. Some one I never really liked much, once said to me that "Ignorance breeds stupidity". I do not know if this was his original saying or not, but this could not be more true.

When I think of this subject it reminds me of a scene from The Wall. The Show Must Go On scene. If you have never scene it here is a link. It is about nine minutes long be patient for the first two minutes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FphuBPNYcWo&feature=related

To me this scene depicts the power of hate, and hate labels. Two things the world can definitely do without.

[MichelleOBrien]

I will take a cue from Starbucks. I am a half gender, high profile, angry, disillusioned, confused, non-op, contrary presenting, non-passing, not needing to pass, transgendered person, with a little foam and cinnamon

I'm stealing this for my signature now...

As for everybody else, the nitpicking was funny the first few times, but then it just got old. What I was suggesting isn't to eradicate the labels, just the stigma attached to them. I was ranting because I was annoyed and pissed. It happens. I realize now that the only way, unfortunately, to remove stigma from labels is to completely eradicate anyone who doesn't subscribe to the same labels... Of course this is illegal in most countries, and often considered a crime against humanity... just ask Hitler, Pol Pot, or any other "extremist" dictator.

So that leaves us back at square one... me being annoyed that there's stigmas attached to the labels that describe aspects of who and what I am... and knowing there's nothing I can sanely, or legally, do about it.

[Valerie1973]

Well, you are what you ware. Unfortunately that is how society views us.

[Fractured]

As others have pointed out, labels help create a starting place for dialogue. I am seeking that label that describes me, both so I can understand myself and so I can present myself to my SO and others in terms that can lead to effective communication and understanding. The uncertainty I have understanding myself is why I currently am avoiding labels (other than confused and perplexed) until I have a better grasp on where I fall. I don't want to make the wrong assumption or association for who/what I am. It may be naive of me to think that determining the appropriate label will help guide me but I don't have any other ideas at this time.