Where to start?

[Zoe Michelle]

Hello, my name is Zoe, and I am a male to female, preop transsexual. Well I suppose you could say pretherapy really. You see, I do not live in an area where it is even remotely safe to be who I really am. Not to be too exact, I'll just say east Texas. Anyway, for my entire life I have known I was born in the wrong body. My family and closest friends whom I have confided in all agree with me on that one. What they also agree with is that it is time for me to come out full time and start the long journey toward SRS. Herein lies the problem. I have no idea where to begin. It is obvious that I need to move to a city and state that has a reputable transgender clinic and community, but I simply can not find any decent information out there. I would like to know where I could go that would would be the best place to get started, and if you can, the names of the right therapists to see in those areas. Please, if you have any useful information, let me know. I am ready to be who I really am in real life, physically and emotionally.

Thanks,
Zoe Michelle

[Teri Jean]

Zoe, there are many places that offer help in areas that are closer than you may think. First off are you single and what is your employment situation. Transitioning can be expensive if you have no insurance that covers the cost of therapy and later HRT and surgery if that is truely in your future. But don't put the cart before the horse and seek out therapy from a gender therapist. You do not haave to start living full time until you make a more informed decission. Take it slow as you have your whole life ahead of you.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Zoe...good luck to you...you are handling your situation very well from looking at your email..

you can take steps without transitioning as Teri points out, but i also understand if you want to move at a faster pace..your transition is best managed by you with all the info you can get...you don't need a therapist at first, but it helps..

have you fully checked out tsroadmap.com?.....that is a site geared towards providing a reference library of information around transition...
are you desiring to move? willing to move if necessary?

[StaceyJane]

Zoe, thre are other members of the forum from East texas, I hope one of them can help. East Texas is a big place and once you get to ten posts you can PM people with questions.
There are transgendered people everywhere, I'll bet one day you will be surprised to find some nearby.

[gretchen2]

This site might help a little www.tsroadmap.com but it will not tell you were to move.

[Zoe Michelle]

Hey girls, thank you for the link, I will check it out tonight. To answer a couple of questions, I am currently in a relationship with a very beautiful person who has been one of the most helpful and supportive people I have ever known. I do have every intention to move, but unfortunately she will not be able to go with me, but we have already had a very long talk, and have decided it is for the best. We will always be good friends. While I will miss her and the rest of my family, I simply would rather start living full time and going to therapy somewhere else so it can all be a fresh start. As far as my job situation goes, I work freight for lowe's and I have pretty good insurance. It is a full time job and I will have no trouble transferring to another city or state I have done so before.

Oh and as far as meeting other transgendered people, I have never met one in my entire life, at least not in person. However, this Sunday me and some close friends are going to a gay club that hosts a drag night. I am very excited about it.

[Melody Moore]

Hey girls, thank you for the link, I will check it out tonight. To answer a couple of questions, I am currently in a relationship with a very beautiful person who has been one of the most helpful and supportive people I have ever known. I do have every intention to move, but unfortunately she will not be able to go with me, but we have already had a very long talk, and have decided it is for the best. We will always be good friends. While I will miss her and the rest of my family, I simply would rather start living full time and going to therapy somewhere else so it can all be a fresh start. As far as my job situation goes, I work freight for lowe's and I have pretty good insurance. It is a full time job and I will have no trouble transferring to another city or state I have done so before.

Oh and as far as meeting other transgendered people, I have never met one in my entire life, at least not in person. However, this Sunday me and some close friends are going to a gay club that hosts a drag night. I am very excited about it.
I think the key is to find the state with the best laws to give you protection, and also offers the best services,
including support networks then decide on where you should settle. Also if you were living in Australia, I would
recommend that you move to Cairns where I live. The tolerance, understanding & acceptance I feel here is truly
amazing, I feel really free for the first time in my life. Our local gender clinic is also fantastic and there are at least
2 other trans-girls that I now have as really great friends. So I have very good services & a support network here.

I hope you can find that same type of a place in the USA and if you compiled a list of all the states, services offered,
support groups, as well as an overview assessment of equal opportunities & anti-discrimination laws in place you would
find the best place to be. I am sure that many other girls here could also use that type of information. Maybe a few of
the other girls here from the USA can help you with that on a state-by-state basis.

[StaceyJane]

I guess my feelings are the opposite. I've spent most of my life in Texas. Now days I go out as a female all the time and if anyone doesn't like it then too bad because this is my home and I'm not leaving.

[Melody Moore]

Stacey, it is great that you have that much courage and I went through the same thing in this was home to me.
I didn't want to leave & had to also get the the point I didn't care about what others think. So I came out here
without having idea how warm or cold the climate was going to be to someone like me. I found it to be a hell of
a lot better than I ever imagined. I have heard many others in different parts of the world say that coming out
in their communities wasn't anywhere near as bad as they thought it to be. However some girls in some places
like the big cities of Melbourne & Sydney have reported being harassed & assaulted by middle-eastern gangs or
other ethnic groups of youths at times. But who this happens to are those that don't pass very well as females.

So some transsexual girls who don't pass as well as you & I do & they might feel safer to be in a better place
where there is more tolerance & acceptance without the threat of violence. So overcoming the fear could also
be hurdle here for Zoe. We don't know have any idea what she looks like or how well she will pass as a female
& maybe this is something she is considering as well. But I don't think it's right to just up & leave the place you
know best without trying to just be happy & be very proud to be yourself. I found others appreciated me more,
because they could how much integrity & courage you really need to be the type of person that you are.

I have 2 trans-girlfriends who don't pass a 100& as females but noone gives them a hard-time around their homes
or the places they need to go to & far North Queensland is not much different to the deep south of the USA as far
as the people are concerned. We have our fair share of red-necks here as well, but I have also seen where there
are others who will jump to your defence and also put that small minority of bigots in their place. But standing up
for yourself earns a lot of respect more so than having others to do that for you. ;)

[Jessinthesprings]

Zoe Dallas has always been very welcoming. People treat me with respect and I even had one guy offer to help air up my tires... Is there bad there? I'm sure of it but I have yet to run into it...

that being said... The first step is to find a theripist. He/She will help your sort yourself out and get you the all needed HRT recomendation letter. In the meantime google, read, and read some more. Know all the good and especially the bad or HRT before you even talk about it with a professional. Knowledge is power and help you and your professional in the long run.

[Zoe Michelle]

Thank you all for the advice. I am going to start seeking out a therapist here in the next few weeks. Probably in the Dallas area, since it's only a couple hours away.

[Sally24]

It might be worthwhile for you to check out which major corporations provide medical coverage for trangender procedures.
http://www.hrc.org/issues/workplace/benefits/7644.htm