Mistaken

[starlitsky]

Hi! I don't know if it's happened to others before, but it strikes me strange every time i hear it. Just today, while shopping at Walmart (i was getting shower curtains), the cashier actually addressed me as "ma'am" before she said, er, sir. the time before that was when i was sitting in a resturant with my parents, one of the waitresses commented that that i was so quiet and polite, my skin was so white (from not going outside at all), that i was "just like a little girl". the time before that was when i had my hair long (slightly past shoulder, but it was due to "not-getting-a-hair-cut" rather than any sort of stylistic choice), and a man came in the washroom, saw my long hair from the back, and thought he went in the wrong washroom.

i don't know. i don't feel that i have a femme personality ... rather, i am "me". so when these sorts of mistakes happen, i can hear my brain go, oh no! did they find out? is it obvious? what's going on? :eek:

[christine55]

My voice is not feminine at all. I do customer support over the phone. Many times people have called me Maam. I wonder if it is my attitude. I am very polite when dealing with the customers and do my best to help them. I am not agressive. I have been called Maam quite a few times and it strikes me because my voice is not feminine. That is my hardest part in passing. I must speak very quietly when I do interact with a cashier etc. and that usually does not work.
Hugs, Christine

[Jesse69]

starlitsky - maybe you do look like a girl. Can you post a pic of yourself ?

I've never been ma'amed because I'm clearly a guy and never wear femme stuff in public.

[Stephanie Brooks]

I've been ma'amed a few times, though not recently. As I recall I had fairly short hair, not cut in a feminine way, and was completely in drab. One of the times it happened I was with a girl buddy. The waiter apologized for mistaking me, but I said something like, "It's fine, not a problem!" I considered it to be a high compliment.

Why does it happen? We're doing something that causes us to appear feminine, and those signals are stronger than our raw appearance.

I'd be curious to know if gay men are ever mistaken for women, or if it is just CDs that experience this.

[starlitsky]

starlitsky - maybe you do look like a girl. Can you post a pic of yourself ?

hehe, nono, i definitely do not look like a girl ... i'm much too ugly to be! i think the stubble would be a definite give-a-way. and i'm much too shy to post a pic of myself. granted, there have been times when i was mistaken from the back (see washroom example above), but my hair's short right now, and i don't gel it or anything.

[gender_blender]

Happens to me all the time. I usually smile and say, "You had it right the first time."


Charlie

[Leilani68]

Quite Often throughout my life I have been mistaken for a Lady.....
I am a very petite size (4-6) person with a Very (fem) baby face....

Plus I have always had a speech problem (very low), however this works well
in the Customer Service Relations area I work in, so when I am Mammed' it
does not bother me Nowadays (I just smile, and continue on). :doll:

[Brightredruby]

I think it's that your essential self, the self who you really are is bubbling to the surface and these people are seeing the real you. How sweet