Came out to my sister!

[rocketscientist]

:eek:Well, I've been wanting to do that for some time, but the time just never seemed right. I've been thinking a lot about the future and what may come as far as my dressing is concerned, and I know it's not just going to "go away". As my already PONDEROUS femme wardrobe and shoe collection grows(seemingly exponentially),it's getting tougher to hide everything femme:heehee:. The closet is already stuffed and i've got femme stuff under my bed,in drawers normally reserved for my male garments,an untold many bags with tops,skirts,shoes in them strewn about my bedroom. After attending the Dunes TG weekend and talking to friends about how "out" they are I decided it was time for my little circle to widen a bit. There are always the little "what ifs", like what if I was to suddenly find myself on the wrong side of the grass, what would happen when my family came to sort through my stuff and discovered that there was a side of me they never knew existed:brolleyes:. Would they have been supportive and understanding then or just plain confused? I was on my Yahoo messenger Wednesday when I decided I needed to do it. If for anything else, to answer any questions she may have about how or why.
So Wednesday I messaged her that I had something important to tell her. That way there would be no going back, she would keep after me until I let the cat out of the bag. Which, due to conflicting schedules I couldn't do til' Friday. Instead of just blurting it out over Messenger(she lives in another state), I thought it best to try to explain with some pictures. I sent her my most recent pic from Dunes weekend and asked "do you know who that is?". She said " It looks a little like you!". That's when I replied "It is ME, I'm TG!" There was a lot of confusion and carrying on, then I recovered,and she asked me "why would you do that?". I answered her the best I could, trying to explain that I'm not even sure why I do it, just that I enjoy it and it's a part of me. Then, of course, came THE question about being gay and such. I told her no, I'm not gay. Not that she would have any problem with that,because she has gay friends and we share a gay cousin. I then showed her a bunch of pics of me dressed, sometimes solo, others with some of my friends at the Dunes weekend. Then I showed her a pic I took of me shopping at Kohl's in Kalamazoo. She said,"You go out shopping for clothes dressed that way?", to which I replied yes. She asked me how I learned to walk in heels and how long I've been doing this. I told her "it started when I was very young, I had 2 evil sisters that used to dress me". LOL. All in all, it turned out pretty good I suppose. She still has questions that I'm not sure I have answers for. I told her about this site and asked her to join so she could learn more about "us". She hasn't yet, but will soon. Who knows, maybe we can go out as sisters in the future! That would be fun. Well, if you got this far, thanks for reading and I hope your day is a GREAT one! Hugs, your sister, Tonya:battingeyelashes:

[Amy Lynn3]

Great for you. I hope she continues to offer support. I have been considering something of sort myself, but glad you carried through.

[AKAMichelle]

It is a lot better when you don't have to look over your shoulder wondering someone close to you will find out. I hope that things go well for you as she asking more probing questions.

[Maria in heels]

Tonya... Good for you !!! I'm sure that you are feeling pretty good now, since a little of the weight has been lifted off of your shoulders. Enjoy and hopefully she will really give you the time for a true heart to heart talk

[Anne2345]

Wow, Tonya! That is quite a story! I am very interested in the ultimate outcome of you coming out to her. Please keep us updated, and good luck! :)

[Wendy_Marie]

Wow,I ha an evil sister like your. She would beg me to play house with her and have tea dressed as a girl. iIalways resisted some on the outside but eventually seemed to always give in. once she even tried to blackmail me by threatening to tell my friends that I liked to wear her dresses and play dolls with her....I told her to go ahead an I would never play again. I was relieved that she didn't call my bluff cause I never wanted to quit.

[Samantha B L]

Hi Tonya, I came out to my sister a week or two ago and it's all a tremendous load off of my mind.
She's %100 accepting but she says she isn't interested in all kinds of explanations. She says if I want we can make time and I can fill her in on the details and stuff later on. I feel funny talking to my nephew about it but my sister says he will definately be %100 accepting. I live with them both in a fantastic apartment so this makes things a whole hell of a lot easier for me. Tonya,you must be very releived! I understand how you must feel.

[rachaelsloane]

Tonya,
I'm sure you feel much better now that you have told your sister. Please let us know how the story continues.
Rachael

[JenniferR771]

Boldly go where no man has gone before, rocket scientist! I hope you sister begins to understand. I hope she joins up and maybe joins the FAB forum. I really hope she has a few cast off clothes and shoes to send your way. I am sure she is shocked and baffled for the time being. But if she has an open mind and a good curious mind she is probably online looking up info right now. Give her time to adjust. Make sure she knows she still has an amazing brother. So sorry I couldn't be at the Dunes last week. Missed you.

[t-girlxsophie]

Its always a nerve wracking moment coming out to someone close to you,and Im glad it went so well for you.
I never had a sister but tonight I am having a nice evening,with me dressed sitting watching Britains got Talent with my wife and my sister in law,sharing a nice bottle of wine.Was my wifes idea to tell her sister,and it turned out to be the right decision,they both are very close and it seemed the right thing to do.i sometimes think having to keep my secret puts a burden on my Wife so its nice at times when she can relax knowing theres no secret to hide.

Sophie

[PretzelGirl]

Good for you Tonya! It sounds like this was mostly done over Yahoo Messenger? If so, are you going to follow-up with a phone call? I think it can be a good thing to do. You do want her to hear your voice, your commitment to this, and your love for her all which don't necessarily translate to the text format. So it may become easier for her to ask you questions that way. Sounds great and I wish you continued love and success with her.

[rocketscientist]

Thanks to all who voiced support for me:hugs:. I would never have gotten this far had it not been for all the kind words and guidance from everyone here. To update, I am still talking with my sister, though she has not joined the site yet. She does have some questions yet, but for the most part she is just fine with it:). We even joked about me showing up enfemme for Easter dinner:eek:. She said she wouldn't have a problem with that. I wonder how my niece and nephew would react though, or my brother-in-law for that matter. When I asked her about him she told me that he had remarked to her that I seemed "different". LOL. Not sure how to take that comment. But, so far so good. Hugs, Tonya:battingeyelashes:

[Cynthia Anne]

Great move girl! There's nothing better than having a sister to share with! SISTERLY LOVE! Top that! Hugs!

[Jilmac]

Great story Tonya, I believe it always lifts a huge burden off ones chest when we come out to whomever. Perhaps you will develop a new relationship with your sister. Once she joins this forum I hope she can be objective and learn more about our lifestyle so she can give you sisterly love, support, and friendship. Last month I also came out to one of my sisters, basically the same way you did, with a lot of pictures of Jill. I told her I have the best of both worlds.

[heatherb]

Way to go, Tonya! It is so much more fun when you're totally out. Come on up to Holland sometime. Heather

[Marsha Clark]

Hi Tonya!
I'm very happy that all worked out pretty well between you and your sister.

Now that she knows a "little more" about you, I would like to add my 2 cents for what it's worth.

You are now very excited that you have "rolled the dice" and the "dots" came up pretty much in your favor.
You are now so excited that you you are running at "top speed" emotionally with this bit of acceptance (which is very good!).

Now as hard as it might be.."Throttle Back" a bit and let her take this at "Her Speed" and "Not Yours".

Take your time is bringing out the delightful and very kind person that Tonya is and let your sister get to know her fully.

May both of you move forward in love and understanding as you share this "new chapter" in your "transgender journey" together.
Love You Lots!
Marsha Clark

[KriistineCDxoxo]

That's so great! I wish I had the courage to tell my sister... I think it
Would b easier to tell her if she lived across the state though so I dont have to tell her in person. But congrats! That's great!