Well, it's done

[Aprilrain]

Today I told my parents. Went over to their house, helped them put their porch furniture out and then we sat down to talk. My mother even turn the TV off, probably to my fathers dismay. Anyway they wanted to talk to me because they know I've had problems with depression so they wanted to recommend a Psychiatrist they know. I told them I was happy with my therapist and then said I had something I needed to tell them.
Their reaction was surprisingly muted. My mother was glad that I shared that information with them. My father expressed concern for my safety, I think he wished he could give some fatherly advise but was probably just in shock. I told them about hormones but didn't bring up surgery's or name change I didn't want to overwhelm them. My dad wants me to see the Psychiatrist, I said I would if it would make him feel better and he said it would. I don't mind going, I really don't think he's going to have any great insights but who knows and it's not like he can tell my parents what we talked about anyway. I will definitely go as April.

[BreenaDion]

Glad it whent good for you april, unlike me both parents died when I decided to come out. See if can use the Psychiatrist for your letter for surgery if you going that route. I came out to my spouces parents a short time ago, knowing ahead of time was gonna be ruff. Sure enough she wont talk to me but thats ok with me, dont have to see her any way. Now the thing is next is my side LMAO what a joke there, but thats for later. Have to take my spouce to see my Psychotherapist at next meeting and make plans to pick up one of my grandsons. He is 12 and wants to see us, been almost 3 yrs. As far as my side of the family they can all kiss off.
Glad it whent well with yours, might have to fill them in with more info as time goes by, you can handle that very well.
Good luck.
Breena.

[Marissa]

Well its great that you have parents who are conerned for your well being to take the time to talk to you about. Yes, I'm sure your father was overwhelmed and maybe felt helpless, but good you are taking the advice to see a phychiatrist. Good luck with your future travels in life :)

[gretchen2]

I am glad that it worked out for today. Hopefully it's still all good tomorrow.

[Sejd]

Hi April
Most parents just want the happiness for their kids. Sometimes this issue can be very overwhelming and hard to handle for most parents. You did great! now stay your course and keep your head high.
hugs
Sejd

[Areyan]

this is just the beginning. start preparing yourself for the emotional backlash that will happen once the shock wears off. i'm happy for you that your parents took it reasonably well. my own mother did - at first. right now they will be telling themselves that you're under stress, mentally challenged or temporarily insane and this is going to change, they'll have their boy back once you've come down off whatever cloud you're on. i'm not trying to be mean, just giving you my honest opinion on how i think things might turn out for you. maybe you're blessed and your parents will embrace their new daughter. i wouldn't be holding my breath if i were you. gather your friends and loved ones who know you and support you already because they will comfort you when things get hard with the parents. trust me on this, most parents who were raised anywhere between the 1930's to the 1950's are not going to cope well with this.

my mother is in her late 50s and my dad just celebrated his 69th birthday, i'm in my early 30s. my mother ripped into me over this once the shock wore off and i was blown away by her vehement denial of my male identity. as much as i tried to reason with her and show compassion for her hurt i could not back down and let her bully me into submission over it. i'm just sayin' to prepare yourself in case this happens. good luck.

:hugs:

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Your parents sound like they love and want what's best for you.. i think your willingness to do little things to satisfy their parental needs is a huge positive and it helps you no matter what the outcome
You will have ups and downs but try not to overreact....they may get info from 3rd parties that are anti-trans so be prepared to prove toyour parents that you know what you are doing...
it's a great start...(i especially smiled when you said you turned off the tv...i had already told my mom, and when we talked to my dad, we turned off the tv to indicate it was serious..LOL)

[arbon]

Glad to hear you have done this, it is a big step that takes lots of courage.

[danielleb]

I am glad that it worked out for today. Hopefully it's still all good tomorrow.

I second that.

Transition is a process, and it works as such for both sides, but you've already got everyone else out of the way, so this should be cakewalk for you. :)

[Jorja]

I am glad everything went well for you. As mentioned, prepare yourself for emotional backlash. This may or may not happen but you need to know it may be coming. Remember, you are not the only one in transition now. It may take some time for your parents to fully grasp the idea. Work with them and keep talking. Communication is important now. You have taken a huge step that many others have not or cannot take. Be proud of your accomplishment.

[Aprilrain]

Day 2 all is quiet on the western front. Neither my sisters or my wife have heard from my mom. I think they all expected to hear something. I on the other hand got a call from my dad who wants to have lunch tomarrow. I think now that he's had some time he's come up with THE LECTURE, we'll see. I really had no idea how I would respond emotionally. I prepared myself intellectually but just accepted that emotions do what they want and I just have to cross those emotional bridges when I get to them. Not having unrealistic expectations helps.

Thanks everyone for your kind words.

[CharleneT]

This news is often hard for folks to digest. More than likely they will go thru several different reactions. Patience is a good thing for you... Very glad to hear their initial reaction was not negative. Build on that :)

[Aprilrain]

I had no idea how I was going to feel about taking this step, of course I looked at it from all different angles before hand and tried to mentally prepare myself for the worst but I still didn't know how I would feel.
I feel liberated, it doesn't matter how my parents ultimately choose to react to this I no long have to hide anything from anyone and that in and of its self is worth it.

[Melody Moore]

I agree with many points made on this thread, especially those about how others also have to go through the transition
& to be prepared for the emotional backlash. But by the sounds of it you are well prepared & the main thing is that you
are happy & you don't need to feel guilty anymore. If they have an issue with your transition, then that is their load to
bear. You have carried yours around for this long, so what does it matter if it takes them a few years to come to terms
with it? They are grown mature adults who can get over it are they not? Well you would hope so & that is the attitude
towards my parents who haven't been as understanding & supportive as your parents sound.
If my parents never come around, then yes that will be sad, but that is life & we will get over it! :hugs: