Hi. I'm new here.

[Samantha Jaynes]

Hi everyone. I'm new here. My name is Samantha Jaynes. I've been crossdressing since I was 5. I've had many years of intense loneliness and still have trouble fully accepting this part of myself. I have a wonderful loving partner who I am slowly feeling more and more comfortable in showing my femme side to, but it's not easy. She supports me and then freaks out, back and forth. I feel like I can only go so far with being the girl I want to be. She like me as a "natural" looking girl. She doesn't like me to wear wigs or too much make up or large breast forms or padded underwear etc. I am really luck to be accepted by her as much as I am. I'd say she is most happy with keeping my girl self in the bedroom and we do have really sexy and fun times together. But there's something else I need, which is to hang out as a girl sometimes, and this makes her more uncomfortable, which makes me uncomfortable and is upsetting to us both, but for different reasons. I guess I need help figuring out how to accomodate Samantha into our lives together in a way that is ok for both my partner and myself. I hope that's ok as an introduction to me. It's kind of what's most on my mind right now.
Also right now I would love to be wearing a pretty dress or something, but I've promised my partner that I'll only dress when we're together. She doesn't like me dressing on my own. She wants to be part of it, which is amazing, but kind of controlling too. I really love her and can't imagine my life without her, but I feel like I can't really, truly express my femme self in the way I need to sometimes.

[Cynthia Anne]

Hi Samantha! Welcome to a beautiful place!! Your loving partner sounds like she really cares and wants you to be happy! Let her work at her own pace! It sounds like a healthy relationship and keep it that way! She will be happy as long as you don't rush things! Hugs to the both of you!

[Maria in heels]

hi Samantha....itis wonderful that you have an understanding partner....they are very few and far in between, so please remember to count your blessings. Let her go at her own pace,embrace all that she allows you to do,and follow her ground rules...in time things may change and try to remember that she is the one that is adapting to Samantha

[Eryn]

Hi Samantha!

It's very nice to have an accepting partner, isn't it? Perhaps she would also like to join us here. We love to have GGs join in and they have their own forum where they can talk privately. This might be valuable to your partner.

Eryn

[Danni Renee]

Samantha, having an SO that even supports a little is a help and with time and patience I would be willing to be she will be more accepting of where you want to go. Do not be in a hurry and let her set the pace. You will be able to express your tru self in time if you and her both work at it.

One of the things I was doing with my girlfriend last night was looking at different wigs for me to try. We both got on different websites and looked at the pictures. We made a list of one to consider and this weekend we will decide which one to go with. Maybe if you tried this with your girlfriend she would be more open to letting you wear a wig since she had a hand in choosing.

I look forward to hearing more from you on the forum!

[Andromeda]

Welcome you should find lots of new friends here. Acceptance of what we are if often a slow and erratic process. You will find lots of good advice here. There is a thread called The real truth about cross-dressing that you lady might find helpful.

[GirlieAmanda]

I am concerned about the controlling part. It is great to have an accepting partner but I am afraid that you will start to have to sneak to dress on your own eventually because of the restrictions on you. Just keep it in mind and try to see why she feels threatened by the ramping up of your girlieness like the wigs and the big boobs and such.

[Josey]

I have a willing partner who GRADUALLY became envolved in my fem activities. Based on the hugh number of members here it seems my case is normal and prefered approach towards acceptance by ones partner. So keep doing what your doing as time will pay off in the end.

[Samantha Jaynes]

Thanks to all of you for the helpful advice. You're right, I am incredibly lucky to have such a beautiful and loving partner.
The common message seems to be "Go Slow" and I'll stick with that advice.

[Crysten]

But also, be wary of agreeing to limits that you won't be able to keep. Compromise is the key, finding common gound you can both work from. Agreeing to things that only later she finds out you weren't faithful to is a road to failure. Best of luck!!

[Samantha Jaynes]

Wow, my partner is the best. She just left me quietly, no fuss, much love, to dress as I please and enjoy myself. I know it's difficult for her for a number of reasons, most notably trust issues, but she was cool and wonderful about it anyway.
It's the first time this ever happened quite this way. Till now our arrangement had been that I could dress, but only with her. The last time I made myself look pretty she realized that it was just something I do, which she doesn't necessarily have to do with me. It's like some guy who wants to play golf. His partner doesn't have to dig it too. Happily, she really likes Samantha in the bedroom and she can enjoy totally making love to me like to another girl if we feel like it. I just love her more than I can say !

[jenniferoonus]

Hi Samantha,

You are so lucky and please treasure the situation. I told my wife 10 months ago about my secrete life and she has given me an ultimatum, stop living as 'Jen' or she will move on without me. Currently, we are still living together and not talking. You are so lucky.

[RobinCA]

Hello dear,
I am kind of in the same boat as you. For my wife, seeing me dressed up is a sexual turn on for her, For me on the other hand it is more of a desire from within to be a "lady". She doesen't like me to dress up unless it's "sexy time" but sometimes I like to dress up and do stuff around the house and she get's uncomfortable. My advice to you is this; Sit down and talk with her and try to explain that you have been dressing since 5 to fulfill your desire to be feminine. Let her know it goes beyond just getting dressed for her and see how she reacts. Take it slow and make sure both of you are comfortable with each others desires. It's a game of give and take, hopefully she will become more comfortavle with your feminine side and understand your desires. Good luck to you, and be sure not to rush anything as it may cause problems for you both. Remember you are lucky to bi in n accapting relationship, and cherish her for it. Good luck to you.

Robin.