nobody to talk to

[BobbieCrescent]

a little background to start: my SO and i are possibly the two most oddly matched people i know. Often she's more stereotypical male, and i'm more stereotypical female. This is all well and good, and actually has made our relationship fantastic in a lot of ways.

However, it leaves me with a lot of pretty severe disinterest on her part whenever i want to bring up skirts or makeup or shoes.

i also have more than a few guilty jealous thoughts about how she's 'wasting' her chance to wear all the cute things society would frown on me wearing.

I can't really talk to any friends i have online, and the few i used to have either gone totally disinterested over time, or drifted off to do their own thing.

Kind of lonely over here...

[Eryn]

Contrary to the media image, most women are not as intensely interested in things feminine as CDers are! Check out the women you see in public. How many are wearing full makeup? Perhaps 5%? The rest happily go through life wearing a bit of lipstick, perhaps a little eye makeup or maybe even (gasp!) nothing. That's the norm. Same thing with clothing. Perhaps 5% pay close attention to fashion, the rest are happy in comfy jeans and athletic shoes.

I've had that jealous "wasted chance" thought too about my SO, but realize that it is unrealistic. To turn it around, have I "wasted my chance" to be masculine because I haven't climbed Everest, participated in combat, or had relations with several Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders? I don't think so!

So, what to do? Talk to your friends here, that's what the forum is for! We love clothes, makeup, and just about any other topic you can think of!

Hugs, Eryn

[Danni Renee]

Well Bobbie I think the forum here is a great place to talk to people and have some interaction. I am isolated from my family right now since I am in Korea and coming here to the forum allows me to explore myself and talk about things that I cannot to to anyone else about.

[Deana ♥ Danni]

Hi Bobbie,

Opposites attract :) I think we all have something in our lives that causes us to have to look elsewhere for support. I know this isn't the same as your case, but I have a son with Cystic Fibrosis, and I don't have anyone close by me that I can sit and talk to about this. I have to get online to find support groups, or just other people in general who know and really understand what it is like. I know it can be lonely but that is what your friends here are for :)

I am a gg, and I know several women who "waste" their chances to dress cute and just get all dolled up..... I think we all take things for granted, and some don't know what they have until it's gone...

Deana

[Kelly DeWinter]

Well Bobbie, you're in luck, WHATEVER is on your mind, you can post a thread here, from the topics i've seen there is not much that is off limits, although is suspect if you post a thread entitled "Mumble dogfacing in the banana patch", you might get a warning from a moderator.

[Fuzzlette]

I know how you feel. I've told my wife recently and I understand she's havig a little trouble with it all ATM, but I don't have any one except here to talk to about it. Funnily your all right about cute clothes too. The stuff we want to wear because I guess its excitig is the stuff my wife doesn't want to wesr. Eg the silks, lace, corsets, stockings. I live it all but she finds it uncomfortable.

Sorry about the bad typing. I'm using my phone

[RenneB]

Talk about not wanting to get dressed up in public.... I just came back from WalMar* and you've got to be kiddin' me. In all of the hundred or so GGs that I saw, three had heels and a skirt/dress. The rest were in jeans or sweat suits. That quote is true, "I love going to the dollor store 'cause it's not like I'm goin' to WalM** where I'd have to wear my good sweat pants." she said.

Think about it if you were a slim GG. You dress up in heels and a midthigh tight dress to go to the department store. On your drive there, everyone is checkin' you out in the car. You walk through the parking lot and people stop and stare. Now you enter the mall and your heels announce you comin' in and where ever you go. Old men stare and smile, young boys stop and stare and other GGs mutter under their breath, "skinny bit&H - who does she think she is".

If that happened to me, I find ways to drab it up with loose fittin' tank top, flats and non-tight jeans. Come to think of it, that's what most of the GGs wear that I see. Man [ I mean ] Girl, I love Sundays. At least some of the GGs get dressed to impress.

Oh, by the way, you can always drop me a pm if you just want to chat about stuff. I'm no expert or anything but I've been doin this for a while....

Renne.....

[Daphne Renee]

Sometimes its difficult to talk to other people about certain things. Half the time people are more understanding than we give them credit for. However thats whats great about this board. You can talk about most anything there will be someone who has similar interests.

[Debra Russell]

My wife and I shop together accasionally and I am always seeing things that would look nice on her (as well as what I like) but she will over think why? and usually finds something all around more practical than pretty -- I spotted a pair of really cute sandals at Target that go with so many things she has (me too) but it's too cold or I all ready have sandals -- don't get me wrong she dresses nice - looks good and I admire her style but there is soo much @(& ^@%% cute, pretty stuff out there, if I bring it up she say's "do you want it" - no but really it would look good on you!! I don't understand - just accept..............Debra

[Karren H]

Friend me on Facebook, email or PM me and we can chat makeup and fashion till the cows come home.... Or till my wife intervenes. Lol.

[BobbieCrescent]

I really should learn to stay away from the internet when i'm bummed out. :) i appreciate all the responses. I was particularly down on myself last night because i have absolutely horrendous eyesight, and, try as i might, i have the most trouble with makeup of any kind. It's fun to put on poofy skirts and dress up, but there's just something missing from not knowing how to, or being able to correctly apply makeup.

[Maddie22]

Bobbie I think we all had trouble with make-up at some point in time. It kinda gets easier as you do it more. When I first started wearing make-up I probably looked awful. I'm getting better now, after 4 years of actually using make-up (and too much money spent!). I also pay attention to GG's that wear make-up and try to take their ideas.

It's funny, but I've been dressing my whole life, but up until 4 years ago I only partially dressed, now I'm the whole 9 yards (shouldn't it really be 10 yards btw?). I notice women even more now. The little details they do, eye-brows, pedicures, manicures, shoes, purses, earings...ect...

As for people to talk to, this forum is great to get ideas, tips, and feedback, or just general discussions, and most important support!!

I can understand your situation with your wife to a degree. I don't have an SO at all, but I have a lot of girlfriends, many of them know about me, and a lot of them dress very plainly, and a little granola-ish, and I always feel that they could dress so much cuter and fun, but that isn't them.

But I do live in the South, so I do have some good friends that do dress very nicely all the time, then I just get jealous because I wish I could pull off what they're wearing!

[Cynthia Anne]

Talk away girl! I love listening! If you want I'll give you my phone number! Hugs!