What to do?

[PrettylilTiffany]

When i was a child i always wanted to be a girl secretly painting my nails in the bathroom and always wearing socks or stealing my gf underwear and wearing it when i was home alone. I experimented sexually with a couple of friends but then stopped suddenly when we all became confused lol a little to much to handle back then. But then i got married at 18 and had a child, my wife and i became very experimental sexually and after stumbling on the fact that i loved when we experimented with her toys on me I starting remembering how much i missed that side of me. So after we got divorced i started buying \underwear and clothes for myself at stores always saying it was my gf birthday and asking for the clerks help. but now im in a dilemma, i experimented sexually with men for the first time and absolutely love it!! Its a very amazing experience especially when the guy embraces my cding and even calls me Tiff. But now i have a serious gf, she knows ive been bi curious and she knows about the cding, she used to not mind at all but now shes getting more serious about us and getting mad when i want to go spend a little me time dressed up with or without any sexual activity. So i dont know what to do anymore i feel bad like im pushing it on her somehow but I hate not having my time to feel the way i feel when im Tiff.

[AnnaCalliope]

Don't get trapped in a relationship with someone who wants to deny you the freedom to be yourself, what truly makes you happy. You've already ended one unhappy marriage, don't get stuck in another.

[Jason+]

But now i have a serious gf, she knows ive been bi curious and she knows about the cding, she used to not mind at all but now shes getting more serious about us and getting mad when i want to go spend a little me time dressed up with or without any sexual activity. So i dont know what to do anymore i feel bad like im pushing it on her somehow but I hate not having my time to feel the way i feel when im Tiff.

Tiffany,

Did she used to not mind that you wanted time by yourself to dress or that there was sexual activity by yourself (I am assuming you did mean literally by yourself since you didn't state otherwise.) The more serious you get I can see her becoming more upset by sexual activity occurring that doesn't include her, especially if it includes someone else.

Don't get trapped in a relationship with someone who wants to deny you the freedom to be yourself, what truly makes you happy. You've already ended one unhappy marriage, don't get stuck in another.

Anna is on the mark here. It's time for a sit down heart to heart talk with your girlfriend and possibly establishing some boundaries that you can both live within if you are going to stay in a relationship.

[Julogden]

This is exactly why anyone with gender identity issues needs to work them out before getting seriously involved with anyone, and once you've worked out who you are, then be totally honest with any potential partner right from the start.

Sounds like you have a fair amount of things to work out and some tough decisions to be made. You need to be totally honest with yourself as well as your girlfriend.

Good luck Tiffany!
Carol

[MsJanessa]

Really sounds like this is not the relationship for you---if it's guys that you prefer--and you do seem to by the tone of your post--maybe you should persue a relationship with a guy--just saying

[docrobbysherry]

I like what Anna Marie said!

I'm not sure how old u r, Tiffany, but here's my advice for ALL young people of ANY gender(s) and sexual persuasion!

Don't get married when you're 18. Don't get married if you're 50 and not sure who and what u r and/or who you're attracted to!
Finally, DON'T GET MARRIED! Unless u WANT to have children and r PREPARED to spend the time, energy, and money to raise them for 20+ years!

R u prepared to do THAT for your child, Tiff?

[joannemarie barker]

I have had relationships with ggs that have all failed.I'm pretty sure they all failed for the same reason and that's that I love men way more.maybe you are in it for the wrong reasons hunny

[Cait]

I'm just posting to echo whats already been said really. It is important that your partner is comfortable with who you are and what you desire to be and their is no real benefit to continuing with a relationship if your freedom to express yourself how you wish is compromised.
I agree with what joannemarie says as well, it could be that you wish to be with guys more, if this is the case, go ahead and enjoy being with guys.

As a more general observation, it is a perpetual source of confusion to me that so many people continue with relationships in which their liberty to be who they want to be is compromised by the other partner.

I hope you can resolve it and it all goes well for you.
x

[kimdl93]

I would probably take a different view. I think its clear that you're bi based on past experiences with males and the fact that you have entered into a serious relationship with a woman. So, I don't think you should deny the existence of either aspect of your sexuality. That doesn't mean you can't have a meaningful, lasting relationship with this woman. You do, however, have to recognize that the worst thing for a relationship (regardless of the genders involved) is deceit. The second worst is to to be unfaithful.

Your cross dressing is out, but give her time to get comfortable with you. by all means talk, but give her some lattitude and time to wrap her mind around it. As for your sexuality, she knows that too. Don't, however, expect her to accept infidelity. A rare few couples can tolerate open relationships, but don't count on it if she's someone you could seriously consider for a long term relationship. Being bi can be a spicy little addition to the sexual play between a CD and GG partner - a little role playing is a harmless way to act on those desires...and a fun little secret to share.

[Joanagreenleaf]

So, she's getting serious about "us" and you're not? Take everything else out of the box and that's a major important difference in your relationship:

"A house divided cannot stand," etc.

Seems like you know exactly what to do - you're listed what YOU are doing - and she disagrees with much of it. With regard to her, it's mostly "your" life at this point; you're not committed to much...

Have a talk with her, keep it friendly, and be prepared to move on to the next relationship, or, for this one to change either in a good way or a bad way.

Nobody is "wrong" here. It just may not be "right" for you two - at least right now.

Meanwhile, I'm sure there are a lot of people on this forum who'd like to know how you got two GGs so interested in you so far - one to marry you, the other to start pushing for an, "us."

If it's not the guy hugging you, or, your taste in women's lingerie, what is it?

Or, IS that it?