~Tammy~
08-26-2004, 09:25 PM
I have just gotten back from spending a few days with the folks. I don't get to see them very often as they live 160 miles away but really enjoyed the time I spent with them over the past few days.
Some of you noticed I started a thread a while back about telling my family about dressing up and some rather wacky ideas about how to go about it. Well I took the plunge and told my sister all about it. She has been fantastic and very understanding about the whole thing.
I started off by saying I have a little secret to tell her. Something only my ex knew about and that I have done since I was 10. (She is 22, about 7 years younger than me by the way). I then asked her what she would say if I told her I was gay or bisexual. She said it wouldn't be a problem at all. Then I said ok well I'm not gay or bisexual. (I'm not sure why I started off with this question as it's kinda irrelevant and I have no idea where I would have gone with it if she said something else!)
Then I asked if she knew who Eddie Izzard is. She had to think for a minute then said yeah, he's a comedian. I said yeah, that's right, and do you know what else he does. Again she paused for a moment then said he dresses up. I then asked what he dresses up as and she said a woman. (She said this like it was a completely normal thing). So then I said so do I. She sat there looking a little bewildered for a while but then asked why was I getting so stressed over it, she later admitted she was more worried I was going to say I was emigrating!
I found it helped to let her think about someone famous beforehand. Someone she can relate to in the world of crossdressing and isn't frowned upon by most of the general public.
We talked a little about how I started, after looking at one of her skirts and thinking that's nice, I'll borrow that, and that she never got it back :)
Then how I used to hide things under my bed which she said she had no idea about any of this. She agreed with me that my mum probably found some clothes when she used to clean my room but never said anything. She probably thought it was a phase I went though and grew out of it. She also agrees with me that my mum would probably be accepting about this and that my dad just might not!
We later went for a game of pool at a bar and after I had won a couple of games she quietly said, you know, girlies aren't supposed to win, so why do I keep winning!
I later showed her my painted toenails and waxed legs and she got a little jealous saying I can do my nails better than her although she loved the colour. (Pinky, purply ish - I'm a little colour blind).
Before I left she asked what kind of clothes I like so we went for a walk around the shops. I pointed out some short skirts, tops and boots. Then I realised we are both sort of in the same boat. She is quite a large woman and said she would also like to be able to wear those kind of things but physically can't, so she kind of knows how I feel.
I left without telling my mum about this, explaining it all to my sister was enough for this little visit, but I know my sis will be testing the water with my mum over the coming weeks/months to gauge her opinion of these things.
In the end I gave my sister a huge hig and explained how great she has been and that now she has a few other options for christmas prezzies instead of some regular boys toys!
My thanks to all the girls here who gave some advice on coming out, including whether to or not. I said it was something I was going to do it but didn't quite know how and now I feel so much better in knowing I have an understanding sister I can share make-up tips with :)
Take Care
Luv
~Tammy~
Some of you noticed I started a thread a while back about telling my family about dressing up and some rather wacky ideas about how to go about it. Well I took the plunge and told my sister all about it. She has been fantastic and very understanding about the whole thing.
I started off by saying I have a little secret to tell her. Something only my ex knew about and that I have done since I was 10. (She is 22, about 7 years younger than me by the way). I then asked her what she would say if I told her I was gay or bisexual. She said it wouldn't be a problem at all. Then I said ok well I'm not gay or bisexual. (I'm not sure why I started off with this question as it's kinda irrelevant and I have no idea where I would have gone with it if she said something else!)
Then I asked if she knew who Eddie Izzard is. She had to think for a minute then said yeah, he's a comedian. I said yeah, that's right, and do you know what else he does. Again she paused for a moment then said he dresses up. I then asked what he dresses up as and she said a woman. (She said this like it was a completely normal thing). So then I said so do I. She sat there looking a little bewildered for a while but then asked why was I getting so stressed over it, she later admitted she was more worried I was going to say I was emigrating!
I found it helped to let her think about someone famous beforehand. Someone she can relate to in the world of crossdressing and isn't frowned upon by most of the general public.
We talked a little about how I started, after looking at one of her skirts and thinking that's nice, I'll borrow that, and that she never got it back :)
Then how I used to hide things under my bed which she said she had no idea about any of this. She agreed with me that my mum probably found some clothes when she used to clean my room but never said anything. She probably thought it was a phase I went though and grew out of it. She also agrees with me that my mum would probably be accepting about this and that my dad just might not!
We later went for a game of pool at a bar and after I had won a couple of games she quietly said, you know, girlies aren't supposed to win, so why do I keep winning!
I later showed her my painted toenails and waxed legs and she got a little jealous saying I can do my nails better than her although she loved the colour. (Pinky, purply ish - I'm a little colour blind).
Before I left she asked what kind of clothes I like so we went for a walk around the shops. I pointed out some short skirts, tops and boots. Then I realised we are both sort of in the same boat. She is quite a large woman and said she would also like to be able to wear those kind of things but physically can't, so she kind of knows how I feel.
I left without telling my mum about this, explaining it all to my sister was enough for this little visit, but I know my sis will be testing the water with my mum over the coming weeks/months to gauge her opinion of these things.
In the end I gave my sister a huge hig and explained how great she has been and that now she has a few other options for christmas prezzies instead of some regular boys toys!
My thanks to all the girls here who gave some advice on coming out, including whether to or not. I said it was something I was going to do it but didn't quite know how and now I feel so much better in knowing I have an understanding sister I can share make-up tips with :)
Take Care
Luv
~Tammy~