Do Seniors Need Gender Correction Surgery!

[Beth-Lock]

In a previous thread, Katesback remarks, "Hell what does a 68 year old need a vagina for anyways? "

Being a senior myself, this question has posed itself to me. I did know pesonally a MTF TS who received her surgery at the age of 70. I have heard she enjoys sex as a woman now, and very much so. There are cases of GCS being performed for people significantly older than that.

Facing transition in one's senior years can result in suicidal depression as it can if you do not go through with it I would think. A person living in a state of uneasy and disrespectful coexistence with relatives, if in a toxic relationship with them, might be better off not alienatinv them further by transition, but then they are unlikely to be real happy with their family in any case.

Most seniors are retired and if at all lucky, financially independent rather than struggling to build their fianancial and career base. They do not have a boss, co-workers or cusotmers to please. That makes the whole thing simpler. Not having a job it is easier in theory to move from a redneck community or one negative to gender issues for other reasons, to a more liberal one.

Many are single, for a variety of reasons and have outlived their parents, so they are not going to be embarrassed or raising objections. Any of their children are no longer in a state of delicate psychoiogical development but grown up and mature.

One can make a case that the senioir years are an ideal time to transition, and perhaps to follow it through to GCS.

What do the seniors out there think? (And of course everybody else.)

[Eryn]

I probably would have given that rather thoughtless statement some credence when I was 25 or 30, but as I get older and, hopefully, wiser, I realize that sexual desire and relations don't stop at age 30 (or 40, 50, 60, etc.).

As far as I am concerned, anyone who has the focus to jump all the hurdles should be able to have whatever equipment they desire, regardless of age.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Beth i am not a senior...

i think the only seniors that should get a surgery are ones that want it!!! LOL...

absolutely retirement is an excellent time..

you should take advantage of today's technology and today's information..there is alot of good medical care out there, and most women find meaningful sexual pleasure after surgery if that is important to you..

and i agree that some things about retirement make transition much more comfortable for some people.....
if you have the finances then by all means you should explore your options.

maybe you've been secretly planning this all along?? hehe

[Barbra P]

I'm. 67, soon to be 68, and I wish circumstances were such that I could transition. But my Wife isn't supportive of my crossdressing, can't even negin to imagine her stance on my tramsitioning. However the major obstacle is financial, there just no way I can afford the cost.

[Melody Moore]

Why not? I see age being no barrier to this final affirmation step, GRS is necessary for someone who wants to feel
complete & experience life as how it should be as a woman, with everything being correctly aligned as it should be.

[AllieSF]

I agree, age has no consideration if the person wants it. Who is Kate or anyone else to say why or why not someone needs a vagina or a penis?

[Jorja]

For many of us GRS is the final step in aligning our bodies with the image in our minds. If the senior is in good health, there is no reason not to have GRS if that is what they need.

Some people simply have no consideration or compassion of others when they spout things like "Hell what does a 68 year old need a vagina for anyways? " To me it just shows their ignorance and a lack of understanding about the subject.

[Loni]

well i almost fall into this category, as i am over the hill, and thinking about doing just such.
but i am still to young to retire. must keep a job so i can eat.
not sure how it would work money wise but not having to worry about a job it does make it easier to do.

.

[Beth-Lock]

Though the comment from Katesback is blunt, the idea behind it is legitimate in my thinking, at least as it applies to me. I have pondered the whole thing, particularly as I may have to eventually make up my mind about GCS in my case, if other roadblocks to my transition are overcome.

Just becasuse one is readied for sex, it does not mean that one is prepared psychologically to face the problems of finding a boyfriend and more than that, a sensitive one and a decent relationship. It is marvelous when an older transwoman finds a good relationship and marries happily of course. I have seen such a good relationship, though the transwoman in questioin is a young senior. Hats off to the happy couple.

But, in my case, it may be opening a can of worms instead. I wonder if I would just be setting myself up for further disappointment. My closest woman freind, a GG, often cries on my shoulder when her men friends beahve badly and turn out to be jerks, crazy or have issues with alcohol. It is not easy to find a nice guy, sensitive and consdierate, and so on, in the best of cases.

Some of the people on this site have pointed out how even if one has the operation, that does not mean that one will be accepted as an object of affection by even the majority of men.

No, it is a real issue. I hope citing that quotation has not led to trivializing the issue and putting Katesback in a bad light.

As I have health issues, and who doesn't as a senior, my counsellors seem to have been backing away from their initial view that one would of course want GCS to be complete, as a woman, to advocating that it not be for me, perhaps because it would be too risky for me, and not even advisable. That is something I have to work out with them and in my own mind. GCS is not risk free, is it? The whole thing has become not only a dilemma for me but a source of agony and depression. Of course people say, if you really want it or are a rreal TS you will want it, but in a real sitaution like mine, that is not much consolation. It is a hard decision to make, and in the end, I may be denied the choice by the gatekeepers, and for all the best of reasons.

[Lorileah]

The easiest and probably most correct answer is she needs a vagina because she is a woman. Just saying if you are TS then having as many correct parts as possible will make you the most correct you can be. Why does a fish need water? If you want it and can afford it and you are healthy enough for it then there is no reason you should not have one.

[Rianna Humble]

Hi Beth, I don't think anyone on this thread was trying to trivialise the question simply because the quote came from someone who is noted for blunt speaking without considering what she is saying.

I am not yet ready for retirement, but I am with those who don't think that age should be the barrier.

Surgery is always a risky business and more so if you have other health problems and you are right, major surgery like GCS can become more risky if your general health could lead to complications, but in the end the final decision has to be yours albeit taken in conjunction with your medical team.

I am concerned that you seem to be basing part of your decision on whether you will find the right boyfriend and that this appears to be influenced by your friend who has had a number of unsuccessful relationships. There may well be a "Mr Right" out there for you - after all I know of plenty of successful relationships between men and women - but should this really be a factor in deciding whether you want your body to fully reflect your gender? I don't have the answer to that question.

[Eileen]

Surgery for me was because of my desire to be complete. Will I ever find a man, who knows. It is more important to find someone that has a lot in common with me, on many fronts, than to find a man looking for sex. As we get older it often takes all night to do what we used to do all night. Passion, even in the later years of life, is still something all can enjoy often for hours. Many of us have had years of stress and confusion. Why not do something that will bring us happiness. It just could be one of the best things we can do for ourselves. I know it has been for me!

Eileen

[gennee]

Everyone should do things that will enhance their life. Age should not be a factor in stopping someone who chooses to be creative and be who they are.

Gennee

[Joyously 27]

I'm in my 80's and the urge is always there, how ever with my health problems
It's wish full thinking to have the much desired surgery.

[Hope]

What an idiotic question.

Age is as irrelevant as hight or the size of one's hands. Provided that one is healthy enough for surgery - the answer to the question is the same as it is for someone who is 15, or 25, or 45, or 85?

A 68 year old needs a vagina for the same thing every other woman needs a vagina for.

[Laurie Ann]

I fall into the senior category I think. I am looking forward to surgery not because of the need to have sex as a woman, I do hope it happens, but to affirm the fact that I am a woman.

[Starling]

As much as I'd feel completed by having a vagina, Beth-Lock, there are too many physical, emotional and financial obstacles in my way. But that takes nothing away from my desire to be as fully a woman as I can be, as often as I can be.

Life presents many challenges, and those that involve one's body can be truly intractable. Some people cannot have joint replacement surgery, some have had colostomies, some are disabled in one way or another. Their bodies are far from perfect reflections of who they are within.

I see myself as a woman who has a probably inoperable condition that can nonetheless be lived around. Just as I'm no less a person if I'm blind, suffer from lupus, or am missing a limb, I'm no less a woman because I have an incurable penis.

Despite all outward evidence, I feel myself to be a woman born, complete with a narrow waist and shoulders, hips which are wide for child bearing, a youthful vagina, beautiful natural breasts and a healthy head of long, glossy hair.

Most cis-women don't have the bodies they want either; and I find that somewhat consoling.

:) Lallie

[Beth-Lock]

I see myself as a woman who has a probably inoperable condition that can nonetheless be lived around. Just as I'm no less a person if I'm blind, suffer from lupus, or am missing a limb, I'm no less a woman because I have an incurable penis.


:) Lallie

Right on Lallie! Very well said.

[Melody Moore]

There is no reason why a senior cannot have corrective surgery & it seems that you were just
looking for validation & reasons why not to have GRS Beth. Sorry that you didn't get the feedback
you were looking for, but if you can live as a woman while having a penis then that is fine & good
luck to you. However you cannot expect many other transsexuals to feel the same as you. Even
those of us who cannot afford GRS hang on to the hope of being about to have everything aligned
as it should be between the legs because many of us are not ready to retire our sexuality.

[Beth-Lock]

Melody: "it seems that you were just looking for validation & reasons why not to have GRS Beth. ... However you cannot expect many other transsexuals to feel the same as you. "


Actually, I am awaiting approval for the next step, taking hormones and my doctor said I could not get them for health reasons in her opinion. Now I am seekting a second opinion. I am in a way, trying to roll with the punches, and try not to be irredeemably depressed that it looks like I can't get the GCS that I want. I don't think it is worth getting suicidally depressed if I can't have the GCS surgery, and am looking into the alternatives I might have to reconcile myself to. Of course, it is not always a matter that is under your control, but you might consider my thinking about the pros and cons a step in the suicide prevention program I am now being counselled in.

Money is not a problem. If one's case is clearly enough indicated, which is of course iffy in my case, medicare will pay, if a board you must go before approves. Then medicare will pay for GCS but not BA, in Montreal. I am not eligible for the top doctor's care in Thailand because his cut-off is age 64. But I could pay out of my own pocket if necessary, for Montreal, which is just a shortish bus ride away. But of course that clinic would have to judge my general health situation good enough for surgery and hormone therapy viable of course too. My case looks iffy on both grounds.

Basically the decision is now in the hands of the professionals, though I might have to override their answer if the risks are too high, since only I myself can judge in the final analysis. If they all line up on the side of the negative, then I have to consider the various alternatives which I am now pondering in advance. I wish I had had it done decades ago when I was in better health, but in those days the psychiatrists would recommend shock treatment if you consullted them, to shock you out of your CD'ing, and approving GCS was not part of their agenda.

I really did not want to get so personal, but it is not the first time I have had someone try to give me advice, for whcih they feel they must know all the facts, so I understand. I have tried to summarize the salent facts in as brief a way as possible. I hope it does not turn anybody off, much less sound like whining!

[Schatten Lupus]

In a previous thread, Katesback remarks, "Hell what does a 68 year old need a vagina for anyways? "
To be very blunt, such a statement is very ignorant on many levels. For one, it can merely having a more anatomically correct body. It is also pretending that senior citizens are asexual. If I can manage to get my hard drive working long enough to retrieve it, I have a study showing it isn't so much age that reduces the sex drive of the elderly, but mostly side-effects of various medications.
But ultimately it is no one's decision but your own. If you reason is that you never want to tuck your penis again and worry about an unsightly bulge, or if you want to be a gmilf that sleeps around, or whatever reason, is it no one else's decision but yours.

[Debglam]

That's her business and I certainly wouldn't know, but if it makes her happy, then she deserves it.

:yt: While there are probably legitimate health (physical & mental) concerns, it is an individual decision.

[Starling]

There is no reason why a senior cannot have corrective surgery...

No categorical reason surely, but there can be many individual reasons, Melody, and to suggest that they are simply excuses is unfair. A single senior in good health, with secure financial resources and good health insurance surely has only mental barriers to overcome; a senior with family responsibilities and chronic medical conditions who lacks the necessary funds (and is unfortunate enough to live where insurance has no cover) is not so fortunate--even though her trans feelings may be every bit as compelling.

:) Lallie

[Beth-Lock]

Suicide and GCS

In the Christine Daniels case, where a well-known LA sportswriter detransitioned and commited suicide, her surgeon made the diagnosis after the fact, that had she had a timely GCS she would have been better reconciied and committed to a happier life as a woman and would not have detransitioned and then taken her own life. While the question of why you need a vagina for sex when you are a senior is one thing, you always need the will to live and if having a vagina helps with that, perhaps that is the strongsest justification you can have.

[Kelsy]

Most seniors are retired and if at all lucky, financially independent rather than struggling .



Looking ahead to my senior years as luck would have it! Everything that I accumulated was taken in a nasty divorce
I am a self employed blue collar and I am in no way going to be able to comfortably retire but I am a firm believer
in the alternative economy and may live out my years as a Gypsy girl. I am becoming an on the road antiques buyer
for my mates shop. I can live in my travel trailer quite comfortably. Let's see a vagina at my age is not a matter of what
I would do with it - it is what a woman has and I am a woman simple as that - "what would a 68 year old woman do with
her penis?"

[Teri Jean]

I hate to admit this but at 62 I could be considered a senior in some people's mind but to be honest a senior is one who is looking up at the roots of the grass over their heads, if you get the drift. A friend of mine is 70 and is having her surgery next spring. It is more the mind not the body when it comes to age. BTW, I had my GRS last month.

Hugs