Hard decision

[Jess Marie]

Hey ladies,

Girl talk time. I am 19 years old. Political Science major with hopes of going onto law school. My dad called me today and gave me an option. He is a long time entrepreneur, started selling night crawlers at age 10 and grew from there. He is looking to start another business, with me running it full time. I would have to stop college and run the business. He will pay for any training I need, pay wages, advertise, and help me run the business for 2 years, and when I am 21, he will turn it over to me. My dream was always to be a cabinet maker, but with the economy still rocky, and a custom cabinet maker already in the area with a good reputation, I am worried that the business wouldn't take off. My other option is renting a store in the local mall and doing something through there, but the mall is dead, along with the area. So I think I might start an online store of some sort but I am not too sure, but it would probably be a clothing store that specializes in womens clothing at first (lets face it, women are the key demographic) and then expand into mens and childrens. I have a friend who is about to graduate from a Fashion school and I asked her if she would work for me and she said she would consider my offer as any other, but if I could get close she would pick me. I am still trying to ponder over this and am planning on talking to the store managers at a few local shops around my area to see if they would purchase from an at home designer.

Your opinion is going to be unbiased. What should I do?

[Stephanie Miller]

Two sayings come to mind:
1) Money doesn't make you happy... but it sure makes being misserable easier to live with.
2) "Sorry, you're not qualified"

I suggest finish college (even if it's not all the way to a law degree) so you have something to really fall back on. Then you can take the offer of your dads. What's a few years for safeties sake. Several years ago the ratio of new start-up small buisnesses that made it past three years was 1 in 3. Now-a-days it's worse. A LOT WORSE.

[Cynthia Anne]

I agree with Stephanie on this! Talk it over with Dad! Perhaps he will rethink!

[AllieSF]

I agree with the finishing college approach. Since all your ideas seem to revolve one way or another around a business, I strongly recommend getting a degree in business. I would concentrate on accounting, finance and legal aspects of small businesses, with some sales and marketing thrown in. Since your dad wants to start you off now, how about negotiating with him to let you establish a solid foundation for a business future by finishing your degree and then helping you start one when you graduate. The degree does not have to take the full 4 years either if you take classes year round finishing in around 3 years. Food for thought! Good luck.

[Jess Marie]

I was a business major in high school with background classes in College Accounting (2 years), Business Law I (currently taking II over the summer), and principles of business, Micro and Macro economics. I took a few classes in high school, like Micro Computer Applications, Microsoft Office Operations (basically shows how to use all applications of MS Office), and Financial Etiquette, showing the best ways to save and invest money.

[giuseppina]

Hello Jess

I side with previous responders.

At your age, tertiary education should be a priority if you are able. Since you have gained admission to a college or university, I have to assume you're able.

There will be other opportunities when you finish your education. It opens doors that will be closed to you should you stop now for your father's idea. Among other things, further education forces you to think critically in a way that is not always easy to grasp without it. Critical thinking is a skill that is always in demand.

I think it is almost impossible to have too much education.

Prospects don't seem very good in your area, and involving friends in a business can make it difficult when problems arise.

[Tanya C]

It sounds like you're all over the map with what you intend to do, law school, cabinet maker, online sales. All the more reason to at least finish your undergrad studies. College exposes you to a variety of fields of study which enables you to make a more informed decision about a career option.
I'm surprised you dad is encouraging you to abandon your schooling in favor of running his startup business. You'd think he would recognize that you will be better prepared to run a business when you're a little older and more educated.

[Jess Marie]

I'm surprised you dad is encouraging you to abandon your schooling in favor of running his startup business. You'd think he would recognize that you will be better prepared to run a business when you're a little older and more educated.

My dad just turned 55 and he has built an empire from the ground up. He started at 10 selling night crawlers to fisherman and he is now a self made millionaire in upstate ny. He has started several businesses from scratch and they are now pulling $50,000-$1,500,000 in revenue each year. The $1,500,000 is a construction company and it is just income, not counting expenses. He has always talked about me taking over the family businesses and I think this is how he is going to get me into it, by starting me out young. I have been by his side ever since I was 5 years old helping him and he let me create a few dishes at one of his restaurants that are quite popular. He just doesn't want me to run the businesses into the ground. He grew up building his businesses without any college what so ever. He started working for a construction company, bought a hotel, then bought the construction company. Once he got capital, he expanded. He wants the same for me, to be a successful businessman.

I think I have a working thought. I will take a year off from college and work under him, shadowing him and helping out, working with the accountants and secretaries. At the end of the year, I'll sit down with the board (my dad, uncle, and grandpa) and ask them about it. None of us want to let our parents down, and I think this way I win. I'll go to school for this coming fall semester, then take Spring off. I am already a junior, since I took inter session courses and am currently enrolled in summer courses.

Is this one a good compromise?

[AllieSF]

I come from the old school that says, prepare yourself for the future. I truly understand how your dad made his successes on his own. Look around and there are very few sons who have been able to follow in their dad's footsteps. There are many reasons for that, but let's say that to me the prime reason is that successful people like your dad are not that common. So, the odds that you will be as successful as your dad, that you will have a similar character and abilities seem to not be in your favor. Your dad is still young at 55, if you want to compromise, how about working summers with you dad doing what you suggested. Ask him to send you his financial summaries monthly and have you comment on them for his review. That way he can give you what he thinks about the same reports and you can then discuss any differences in opinions and learn as you go. It would also involve you with the financials of each operation and prepare you for the future as you see what you dad does and the results that he obtains. Anyway, I am a "get your degree" type of person, as it gives you a basis for the future, your future. That is my 4 cents worth of advice. Good luck.

[Eryn]

In my experience the best transition from fathers to sons running a business came when the sons were encouraged to get as much business education as they could. Your father may have been successful without it, but today's business environment is very different from that of 30 or 40 years ago.

With an MBA under your belt you would be much better equipped to take the reins of your family's diversified businesses.

[LisaKarenAZ]

Finish your degree. In this day and age, as well as the economy, a bachelor degree is equivalent to a high school degree 20 years ago.
You're already a junior. By loading up on credits and adding classes during summer, you can finish pretty quickly.
I'm sure that if you talk with your dad and explain that finishing will help with your success with the family business, he could only agree with you. Most of us here can attest that putting something aside until later usually results in never getting back to it.

I stress to my own kids the importance of that secondary education. I worked my way up the ladder without college, but it would have been much easier with the degree.
As someone else stated,there is no assurance that you will succeed in the family business. Why not create the assurance that you have something to fall back on.

Just my seasoned 2 cents.

[Edwina]

Jess
You asked for advice and the consensus appears to be to get your education first and after that the world is open to you. One of the attributes of a good leader is the ability to prioritize and I think your first priority is to equip yourself.
As has already been said, the world of commerce is far different today.
Good luck

After reading your other recent post about Walmart I question why you would be working there and not in one of your father's businesses gaining valuable insight into it's dynamics?

[prettytoes]

I'm a custom cabinet maker, so I'm biased. I am doing what I love, and I am very busy. I was laid off 2 1/2 years ago after 13 years with a large cabinet manufacturer. I decided to start my own business, and it has been going very well. I specialize in antique restoration, refinishing. I work extensively for a local fire and water restoration company. I also do a lot of custom jobs...bars, reception desks, store fixtures, etc. There are a lot of cabinet shops in my area, but none that do quite everything I do. You just need to find your niche. Good luck in whatever you decide.

[Vickie_CDTV]

I will give a bit of a dissenting opinion here. While finishing college would be a good thing, if you cannot wait then I would take your father's offer. Remember, a college education is no guarantee of anything, and you may end up a college graduate working at walmart of something, and you may end up saddled with crippling debt from an education you may never be able to use. If you have an opportunity to run a business where you can make a decent living and have a reasonable amount of security you might want to take it.

I only went to college because I thought it was my ticket to a good job, only to find a long line of folks with tickets ahead of me with little chance of getting in. In hindsight I could have learned what I really needed to learn to work though occupational training, an apprenticeship or a trade school and it would have been faster and far cheaper. I'd tell young people to weigh other options before possibly wasting 4 years and putting themselves in huge debt and see if you can accomplish what you want via other means.

[DonnaT]

Your dad is looking to start another business, but it sounds like your dad isn't the one choosing the business and is instead leaving that up to you. Is that correct?

Your dad succeeded because he found a niche with little to no competition.

My sister-in-law and her husband never went to college, started out with working on building a communications network of radios and towers, sold that and went into selling satellite antennas and cable tv, sold that and went into pagers then cell phones. It was the buying and selling that helped them become millionairs not just operating the business.

But, the recent economy and current competition bit into their income, and they've had to buy a smaller home and cut back.

A business, making $50,000 a year isn't worth the headaches. Overhead, taxes, salaries, insurance, etc. etc.

Right now you are a Political Science major with hopes of going onto law school. Why? Why did you want to go to law school? What portion/field of law did you plan to practice?

A lot of advice about continuing your education, Question is, do you continue in your chosen field, or switch to business, or combine the two?

I'm an Electrical Engineer and practice Intellectual Property Law as a Patent Agent. It's a field that will last forever, Patents, Trademarks and Copyrights will be around forever.

So I am in favor of getting an education.

Your dad is 55, and hopefully in good health. And it doesn't sound like he'll be wanting to retire anytime soon. Giving you plenty of time to obtain your degree, and go into business with him if you want to practice business law.

[ChrisP]

Education is only as good as what you do with it.
You have a mind for business, and personal and family experience with business.

Would you enjoy practicing law? Does it offer you the things that you enjoy on an intellectual basis? There are a lot of good things to be said about practicing law; if you think that you would find that attractive, then stay in school.

But, if building a business up, expanding it, seeking new markets appeals to you, well, this is kind of a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I think you are wise to seek a niche that is unfulfilled and start there. Before heading into fashion you might want to look around carefully. Some of the big retailers are struggling right now.
Internet sales are undercutting bricks and mortar stores. Keep that in mind too.

What a wonderful dilemma to be in! Good luck with your choices, and let your heart inform your head.

Chris

[Starr]

I am going to go the other way on this.. right now a degree is not worth what it use to be. If you look around you will find many college degrees in low paying jobs. Book sense is great however if you believe in your Dad, as he appears to believe in you, you will learn much more about business and how to deal with the problems and opportunies it brings from your Dad then you will from a book.
It sounds like you have a wonderful and smart Dad who is looking to help you if you want it. The real question is, do you want his help and do you want someday to take over his businesses?

[Iskandra]

I used to work in IT, I've done it all, sold, repaired, programmed, single pc's, mainframes as well as large networks.. I was a teen, it was my hobby, loved computers.. But working with them killed my joy.. It left me lost for years.. Now I manage the fruit and veg department of a large chain and love it.. (would love it more if my nails werent permanently dirty) Never would have thunk it... My family always had high aspirations for me, "you're so intelligent you can do anything, doctor, lawyer, the next bill gates.. rah rah.." I tried to please but as it goes,it only works if you love what you do!!!

Find what you love and follow it! Be it the education, working with your dad or walmart!! The most successful ppl love what they do/did.. Your dad sounds like one of those and will understand regardless of your choice..

I..

[Chickhe]

If your dad is so good at starting up businesses, then he can do the same for you in a few years after you finish school. You have to be careful about letting your father do the work for you...you might need those skills yourself when he is no longer around. If it were myself, I would pick a business I am passionate about then decide what skills I need, go to school for that and then build your business with input from your father if needed. The thing to consider, now you have someone to support you if you go to school... once you start working, even if your business is not doing well, it is almost impossible to stop everything and go to school later. Also, school is a fantastic networking opportunity...to meet other people your age who are also interesting in what you are.

[Sally24]

Since you don't have a solid idea of what you want to do, experience is probably more useful than college right now. If you ask people with a college degree, most will admit they are not working in the same field as their degree. Your family business sounds diversified so there are probably many places you could fit in.

The one year off idea is pretty reasonable. You can always go back to school.at any time. Good luck!

[Joanagreenleaf]

Finish school. Being given a business, then mucking it up because you're too young or ignorant to see a problem, leaves you with no skills to fall back on and a resume as a business failure. And, don't think just because you're the favored son and get lots of support that you'll be as good as you could be if you'd done school and THEN gone into the family business. What's your Dad's angle in this? Why's he trying to drag you out of school? Are you just piddling there, or, do you have a real goal - like taking over the business and making it three times the size it is today - then selling it and becoming a venture capitalist? Managers can be hired, and he could hire someone to run a business.... What's he need your pound of flesh for? Be nice, but cover all your bases in preparing yourself for the future. There are many difficult challenges ahead and many of them have noting to do with "bidness." Many have to do with wives, neighbors, kids, aging parents, cancer, politics, economic ups and downs, accidents on the freeway, a sick baby, etc. Again, it isn't all "bidness."

[celeste26]

So much depends upon your the quality of your relationship with your father. Is he truly supportive or does he just like to get his own way on things?

Assuming he is truly is supportive and since he built up so many businesses himself ask him what would be good right now I'm sure he has some ideas that maybe you haven't thought about that you can get into. While it is very important to know the essential accounting just to keep track of the money, it is not essential that you do all the accounting. You've seen how your father deals with employees and following in those footsteps sounds like a good way forward for you. I agree with those who say wait on college. Later on when you do choose to go, you will be far more focused on the valuable courses and what they can do for you than you might see now.

[Dawn cd]

Starr said "right now a [college] degree is not worth what it used to be." I believe you can't put a monetary value on education. Of course, you can add up your tuition payments and do a cost analysis, but education is about becoming a deeper human being, which can't be measured in dollars. The college experience comes at a time in our late teens and twenties when values and life-outlooks are being shaped. We can't go back and re-create that time later. Get your education, dear. Let your heart and your dreams grow. Don't put it aside for something available, but shabby.

Dawn

[RenneB]

I'd definately finish college. I dropped out after the first year, took a long break and of all my "friends" was the only one to go back and finish. I ended up with the cool desk job while they went on to bus tables and wash cars. The degree makes a world of options open up for you later on. Most employers use it as a criteria to weed out all the applications they get for new jobs. So get the degree...

During the summer you can still learn the business and make a decision after graduation....

Renne....

[kimdl93]

My personaly opinion is that you should jump at the chance to get started by working in a business with your Dad. There is nothing better than learning from someone who has been there, done that and suceeded! You really can learn more than at school, and learn to avoid all the usual mistakes. Plus he's providing the equity. Its all good.

[sterling12]

I don't know your Father, don't know you; but I would suggest that there can be very large pitfalls with accepting Major Help from your Father at this point. As has already been pointed out, you seem to be at a real loss on exactly what you want to do with your life. It's OK, that sort of thing is natural at age nineteen! It might turn out that you really don't want to do this type of work at age twenty-one, or age twenty-eight, etc., etc.. We become very different persons as we grow older, and there is a HUGE Change through our twenties. Education gives you some versatility! What they are really teaching you, (hopefully) is to learn how to think and reason. That is irreplaceable knowledge that applies to almost anything you would care to do with your life.

Second HUGE Problem. As I said, I don't know your Family, but it's been my experience that often, very dynamic Entrepreneurial-Type People can be Very Domineering! Often, for The Children of such individuals it becomes very easy to become just an "extension" of their Parent's Wills. Often, these children become weak, and dependent. Never ever, becoming their own persons! I would suggest that if you want to work with your Father, if you wait for a few years, go out and have some success of your own....then it becomes a lot easier to "be your own person." Actually, if you strike out on your own, and succeed? Just guess which child your Father will respect The Most! Then....if you care to, it will be so much easier to be involved with your Father in business.

Your young! It's scary to go out and survive in The Big, Bad, World these Days. Ah, but if you do; and you become your own successful person.....it is sublime!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Fab Karen]

Look at his proposed business like it was coming from someone other than your dad- would it have a real chance of success? Would you be satisfied doing that? Could you at least eventually make good money with it? Don't do it just to make your dad happy. You could go to school & work on doing your online business in your spare time.

[Jess Marie]

I talked to my dad today and it was a little weird. I told him I wanted to continue on in school because I really want to experience of being in college and it wouldn't hurt to get a degree atleast. He was okay with that, he sounded a little disappointed, but he said he understands and the offer is always on the table and he really would like me to come start taking the reins soon.

I called his business partner, my uncle (not actually related to me, but he has been part of the family way before I was around), to try to get the scoop on why my dad was wanting me to come work all of a sudden. Apparently, my dad is starting to age, after 45 years of backbreaking construction work, combined with stress of business owning and operating many businesses and he is looking to retire as soon as he can, handing his half of everything over to me. I was a little astounded by this. A new stress was put on my shoulders.

I called my dad back. I asked if he really wanted me to come start so he could retire soon, and he said he was happy that I want to do my own thing. His voice told a different story. I told him I would start working with him every summer and on breaks as often as I could, but I need school time to learn and he was happy to hear that. I understand where he comes from though, he has no other kids to, pass the fortune too, I am his only child. So, I feel obligated to take over for him.

I talked it over with my SO, and she was supportive of my decision to go to school and help out whenever possible. I plan on proposing to her in the next year or so, so her thoughts are quite important.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I do have mixed thoughts about what I want to do in life. It is between 2 options, and 2 options only.

Cabinet maker- my dad, as a carpenter, always was working on a job site, and I always had the most fun installing cabinets. He brought me to our local custom cabinet maker and good friend of the family, dropped me off at noon (mind you I was only 9 or 10 at the time) and picked me up a few hours later. This only drove my love for cabinets even further and made me want to make them ever more. For my 11th birthday, I received a belt sander, wood glue, table router, and joinery clamps. He allowed me to make some cabinets under his supervision and I loved it. Through out high school, it stayed with me. Most boys grow up wanting to be a policeman or fireman, I wanted to be a cabinet maker.

Lawyer- During my senior year, we were required to take part in trials, where we assigned a position and went through a trial. I was good with my teacher and told her I wanted to be in the prosecution. I loved it so much that it has stayed with me and its what I want to do these days. My cabinet making went on hold, because going to law school seems like my calling. If I had the option today to be a cabinet maker or a lawyer, I would pick lawyer. I love all my poli sci classes and plan to continue onto law school. Many of you asked what type of law I want to go into, easy: Estates, Divorce Mediation, and Personal Injury (my economics prof always says "if you can't beat em', join em'"). My hopes are to start a practice here in upstate ny because I am not a city person.

[Tina B.]

Maybe I'll do this, or maybe I'll do that, sounds like you are not sure just what you want, knowing your dads business you know the time you have yo put in to get a business off the ground, even in a good economy, much less in this one. Do you want to be a Lawyer, or a cabinet maker, from that, do you really want to run a retail business, or are you just looking for a paycheck? Your young, take from an old retired guy, what ever you choose to do, your going to be at it a long time, make sure it makes you enjoy what your doing, it makes getting though life much easier and a lot more fun.
Tina B.

[JamieTG]

Is it your dream to run a business started by your dad or is it your dream to be independent and do it on your own? I would stay in college and get your degree. The economic recovery is dead in the water right now anyway and its no time to try to get a new business off the ground.

[silhouette]

a few years running a business is way more impressive on a resume than a polysci major

wth does a polysci major do for you unless you're going to work on someones campaign or something.
idk.. i am not poly sci. lol.

soo yeah.. there will be thousands of poly sci majors, but how many ppl will there be that had their own business at your age?

[Fab Karen]

Breaking your back to make your dad happy isn't a good idea ( giving all your free time to him is a version of that ). It sounds like his mortality is being used as a guilt trip. If he can't continue in his business(es), he could sell them & still give you an inheritance.