Feeling frustrated.

[patti1569]

I’ve been really frustrated lately and it is totally affecting my mood. Over the past year I have been slowly dressing again (slowly for the sake of my wife’s comfort level), and I have finally gotten my wig, makeup, cute outfits, killer shoes, shaved my legs (and a lot of other body hair), and amassing all of the things that a good crossdressers needs. So, sounds like the perfect situation and life is all good right? WRONG! My life is so busy that I have no time to dress :sad:. I’m soooo frustrated! I’ve had new makeup and wig for about three weeks now and only worn them once! I know that I’m not the only one in this boat, but what I want to know is what do you do to cope with the frustration when you know that you have all of these wonderful things, but no time to dress! I know that retail therapy would do wonders for my mood, but I have very little money for shopping right now, and quite frankly, looking at all of the cute things that I can’t have is making me even more frustrated!! Help me!!! Thx for reading my rant (I kinda feel better already), xx Patti.

[Karren H]

Awww... I know the feeling. I've dressed once in the last 6 months!! Just do not have the time... Work, home... Overwhelming. But I've incorporated enough fem things in my life on a daily basis to keep me happyish... And I play ice hockey a couple times a weeks so I can knock someone down and take out my pent up feminine anger! Lol. Hang in there...

[5150 Girl]

how about experimenting with androgany? Ya know, be fem enough to make ya happy, but not so fem ya tell the world "Im a CD"

[Joanagreenleaf]

How much time do you need - and why do you need so much time?

I can do a "set" in ten minutes or so. How long does it take you, for example, to come home from your guy work and change clothes to wash the car as a guy? It's just clothes. I usually shave first, but I shave twice a day most days anyway.

My former wife used to come home from the office, march to the bedroom, pull off her office work clothes, pull on some gardening things, and head right back out the door - in five minutes or so.... if women can do it, why can't a CD?

Beyond just trading clothes, if you "need" to dress up and don't have a lot of time, then take it in small bits. Twenty minutes here, twenty minutes there. Or, a dab of makeup for fun, do a few things, straighten yourself out, and go on with something else.

Sometimes a sip of water, instead of a lake's worth, is enough to get by... But, don't wait until you're nearly comatose to reach for a cup.

[Karren H]

How much time do you need - and why do you need so much time?
.

10 minutes?? I can't even put my foundation on in 10 minutes!! Lol. I won't even get my fem things out unless I can dress for 8 or 10 hours straight....

[BillieJoEllen]

Most weekdays will find me in some form of feminine dress. Usually around the house I wear women's pants or shorts and a nice top. I haven't really been fully dressed now in well over a year and have only had a skirt or dress on maybe 20 times tops. I still have to keep things super secret from my wife as shes very opposed to my dressing. I'm frustrated that I can't dress all the way. If I did I could only be like that for maybe four hours tops. Not worth it.

[patti1569]

10 minutes?? I can't even put my foundation on in 10 minutes!! Lol. I won't even get my fem things out unless I can dress for 8 or 10 hours straight....

Haha! Karren, we think alike. I think I could do with 2 or 3 hours though :).

[AllieSF]

Patti, sometimes being too busy is a good thing. I am not busy enough, have all the time in the world to dress up and go out or just stay around the house. But, I only dress 1-2 times a week when I can go out. I would rather be busy with chores, work, family and other things too.This is not to take away from my dressing time, but to "get a real life" and get my head out of the fog. In your case, maybe you just need to set aside some time once a week, every two weeks, once a month and put that moment on your priority agenda and then follow through on it. Even if it is for just a couple of hours. A couple hours never works for me. I am with Karren, I need to get out for 5-8 hours to fully enjoy all the effort I put into the preparations. By the way, Karren is a better engineer, Toot, than I am and it shows!

[Joanagreenleaf]

I was thinking about my earlier response and I should probably add that since everything is organized in the closet and bathroom at our house, and there is no fear of a "discovery" or an argument around here, it's really no great shakes to shift gears quickly.

Ten minutes to get ready is a minimum, but that assumes I have a plan and just get on with things. Most the time, it all works out fine. There are, of course, times when a lot more time would have been a good idea.

As for not bothering unless it's for 5,6,7 hours... Well, that's a pretty high number for a "go/no go" round of something you really want to do. No wonder people get frustrated... Ease up and take smaller bites of life! ;-)

[5150 Girl]

10 minutes?? I can't even put my foundation on in 10 minutes!! Lol. I won't even get my fem things out unless I can dress for 8 or 10 hours straight....

The only thing that takes me longer is shaving and doing my makeup. I can do my makeup in about 20min nif I have to. Shaving it depends on how much I have to do.
My cloths don't have to come out of a "hiding place" so there's no real time cost there.
All in all,,, It takes my "evil twin" about an hour 45 to get ready for chuch on Sunday morning. (feed&take out dogs, breakfast, shave, shower, suit&tie (yuck))
I can get up, and put Wynonna together in anywhere from 2 hours, to 3, pending on how much extra shaving I need, and how much goof'n arround I do.
At any rate, Like Karren said, if I can't dress for the day, I usualy don't. But often times, I'll just wear a skirt and heels arround the house.

[Kathy4ever]

I've been frustrated for over 2 years now. My wife lost her job and she is always home. She does not accept and the kids are always home too. I have to wake up at 4am and get a little fem moments. Not as much as i want but a little bit can go along ways for now. I know I will get more time eventually.

[Tara D. Rose]

Yes I agree with you Patti. If we cannot dress when we want to, we do become frustrated and bitchy and ill. Like some other posters on here, I feel for them that have the stay home wife that knows but doesn't want to see and with children at home. I know that would be so very extremely frustrating. I'm fortunate in that aspect for my wife says I can dress anytime I want to. I have sowed it down a lot becasue of problems in the past as a result of my crossdressing. But it's here for me anytime and that is great. No obstacles in my way.

[Stephanie47]

As a retiree I have lots of time to be en femme, when the school year is on. Even a seven hours a day, I yearn for more time. I love it when my wife takes her annual trip for seven to ten days. I've learned to mentally put together my outfits in preparation for being en femme. Some of my dresses are shorter than others, so I've stored a particular dress along with the appropriate color slip and undergarments. Red print dress with a lacy red slip, bra and panties. My shape wear is kept together. My slips are stored by color.

As just about everyone has stated with the exception of applying makeup, I can throw on a total ensemble in less than five minutes. When all I had was an hour, I wouldn't even try. Those days were entirely too stressful. When I was still working I had to take a 'mental health day' to keep my feminine side satisfied.