Came out to my sister tonight

[Amanda22]

My very slightly younger sister and I are not very close. We only see each other every few years and perhaps email each other three or four times per year, and send holiday cards. We live in different states (in the U.S.). I just emailed her explaining that I'm a CD. She's the only family I have, and as I said we are not close, so it'll be interesting to see how she responds.

[LIKETODRESS2]

I hope she supports you. SHe may suprise you

[jaqueline1]

i hope she give's you lot's of support. and accepts who you really are. who know's she may offer lot's of tip's and advice

[Sophie86]

It's too bad that you're not very close. I have four sisters, and we've tried to stay close over the years. I've only come out to the oldest, so far. The other three are younger than me, so I'm their Big Brother. Don't know how they would react to finding out that big brother likes to dress up like big sister. :)

[xd-tigger]

Fingers crossed that she responds in a positive way, and maybe this will bring you both closer together.

[Amanda22]

Fingers crossed that she responds in a positive way, and maybe this will bring you both closer together.

Tigger, my coming out bringing us closer together never occurred to me. That would be awesome! Now, I'm hoping for that to happen...

[Kim_Bitzflick]

I hope all goes well for you. Keep us informed.

[Amanda22]

It's too bad that you're not very close. I have four sisters, and we've tried to stay close over the years. I've only come out to the oldest, so far. The other three are younger than me, so I'm their Big Brother. Don't know how they would react to finding out that big brother likes to dress up like big sister. :)

Hey Sophie, I was disowned by my family 16 years ago and repeated attempts to start relationships have fallen flat. So I've given up. I actually have four sisters, too. One I mentioned in this post, two haven't spoken to me for 16 years, and the other one's status has been unknown for decades. This is what happens when a family is led by a mentally ill mother (status unknown) and a father (now deceased) who stayed away from home as much as possible.

It must be wonderful to have siblings who love you. I hope my coming out to my slightly-younger sister may create some sort of bond between us.

I love your posts, BTW, and i LOVE that dress you're wearing in your avatar!!!

[Gerrijerry]

hope it all works out fine

[Kathi Lake]

How, exactly, did you 'explain' yourself to her? Did you say "This is who and what I am" and then ask her what her thoughts were? Did she already know? I'm curious. Hoping for the best!

Kathi

[Paula Siemen]

I can't imagine your family relationships??? I was very lucky to be rasided in a loving family, father, mother, older brother and older sister (I'm the baby). I haven't revealed my cross dressing to any of them, although I think there may be some suspicion...who knows. My mother is deceased and my father is 88 with failing memory. Its hard to carry a conversation with him on anything much other than what he did TODAY. I'm close to my sister although she lives in a distant (300 mi.) city and we chat over the phone a couple of times a month (unless Dad is having ISSUES).
My brother is however estranged from my sister and I ( pent-up jealousy and rebelion to any authority... my opinion) and somewhat to Dad...rairly communicates. It really sucks when families fall into disfunction. Oh how I miss my mother for someone to talk to!!!!!
My heart gos out to you, Amanda!
God Love You!
Paula

[Amanda22]

I can't imagine your family relationships??? ... Oh how I miss my mother for someone to talk to!!!!!
My heart gos out to you, Amanda!
God Love You!
Paula

Hi Paula, thank you for your very caring message. My parents didn't want me when I was born/little so all the bad stuff was my "normal". It's remarkable how adaptable kids can be. I'm sorry you miss your mother so. It's a testament to how much you love each other. To this day, I have a very empty/sad place in my heart for the loving parents I never had. I survived, though, and that's what matters now.

Thanks again for your kindness.

[Amanda22]

How, exactly, did you 'explain' yourself to her? Did you say "This is who and what I am" and then ask her what her thoughts were? Did she already know? I'm curious. Hoping for the best!

Kathi

Hey Kathi, My sister knows nothing of my CDing whatsoever. I wrote that I have something of a very personal nature to tell her. I didn't go on and on with too many details. I just said I'm a crossdresser and that means I wear women's clothing often. I explained I do it because it resolves a gender conflict in the core of my being. I told her I'm not gay nor want to physically transition via SRS. Furthermore, my friends and wife all know about Amanda and fully support me. She's very conservative, religiously and every other way, and so I said it was OK if she finds this really distasteful and even "wrong." She's a fundamental Christian, so expect her to be unapproving, and that's totally OK. I gave her the option to just ignore me, tell me how evil I am and that I'm going to spend eternity burning in fire, or whatever. I apologized for dropping this bomb on her but I'm tired of keeping secrets from people. I hope that all made sense :)

[Amanda22]

Hey, I just got a little email from my sister a minute ago telling me not to worry about what I told her and that she'd write me later today when she gets home. You girls may be right; she might surprise me. That would be awesome. I don't want to get my hopes up too high, though...

[Nicole Erin]

Sometimes even these fundamentalists can be accepting. they may not agree with whatever they deem as "sin" but they don't always hate the "sinner".

Now one thing I don't know how you get by with is the only family is someone in another state. My family is not big but there is a hand full of us. I just wonder what it is like around holidays with no family close by.
I mean do you like have kids or a wife or anything? I know a wife isn't the same as true family cause spouses come and go but it is something I suppose.

[Sophie86]

Hey Sophie, I was disowned by my family 16 years ago and repeated attempts to start relationships have fallen flat. So I've given up. I actually have four sisters, too. One I mentioned in this post, two haven't spoken to me for 16 years, and the other one's status has been unknown for decades. This is what happens when a family is led by a mentally ill mother (status unknown) and a father (now deceased) who stayed away from home as much as possible.

I'm sorry to hear that. :(

It must be wonderful to have siblings who love you. I hope my coming out to my slightly-younger sister may create some sort of bond between us.


I love your posts, BTW, and i LOVE that dress you're wearing in your avatar!!!

Thanks! I love it too. My wife bought it for me. It was so sweet of her to think of me while she was shopping. :)



Hey, I just got a little email from my sister a minute ago telling me not to worry about what I told her and that she'd write me later today when she gets home. You girls may be right; she might surprise me. That would be awesome. I don't want to get my hopes up too high, though...

Great!! I hope the talk goes well!! :)

[Amanda22]

Sometimes even these fundamentalists can be accepting. they may not agree with whatever they deem as "sin" but they don't always hate the "sinner".

That's true. I shouldn't make an assumption. I have no problem with whatever anyone chooses to believe.


Now one thing I don't know how you get by with is the only family is someone in another state. My family is not big but there is a hand full of us. I just wonder what it is like around holidays with no family close by.
I mean do you like have kids or a wife or anything? I know a wife isn't the same as true family cause spouses come and go but it is something I suppose.

I have been married for almost 3 years, so I "inherited her parents who are very elderly and treat me like family. It's nice. Before my wife, holidays were a chance to catch up on work and an excuse to treat myself to a nice dinner out.

[Kathi Lake]

Sometimes even these fundamentalists . . .


<- - - - - Oh, look! There's one of them right now. Get her!!!

:)

Kathi

[pernille d]

intersting thread , i hope all goes well for you being honest is the right way to go .

familys can be strange i have a very small family mother, brother and two other distant relatives that i never speak with . my mum and dad split up when i was 16 and i think i have seen my dad for 3 or 4 times in 26 years, so i understand your relatinship as nothing was wrong between us we just never kept close contact . and thats how it was , just recently i get informed my dad has passed away , then it sinks home and you feel guilty you did not keep in contact or see each other more often .there are so many things i dont know about my dad for the last 26 years and now i will never know, and i had the time to change it but i left it too late . This leads me to my point that it is the best thing to tell and let her know slowly about who you really are ,so good on ya girl! . what ever happens i am sure you will have a bit more clarity in your head now

[Anna B]

Hey Amanda, sounds positive to me. (Hope I've not missed any significant posts since it happened!)

But then again I' nearly 60 now so I can claim alzheimers or whatever...

Anna x

[Joanagreenleaf]

Well, I'd be more interested in hearing "Why say anything now?"

And, as a general observation, it might be a be shock to most people reading this, but, over the long haul, families wind up being pretty useless as you grow older - and older. Your parents can't really live your life for you, your siblings have their own lives, your kids don't keep in touch very well... It winds up being your wife or girlfriend who turns out to be your best help mate in life - at least your older life. Families are great for getting kids on their way, at least in theory, but over the long haul everyone winds up being virtually alone in dealing with the rest of life, or, the rest of their lives. A gentle way of saying the same thing is, "Look at all those older people who wind up in retirement areas together playing golf and taking "water fitness" classes, and stuff... And, all the fun the "geezers" have on sitcoms on TV..." So, my point is - what your family thinks of you, your politics, your opinions, your friends, your clothes are all things you can worry less and less about as you go along. I guess they're good to practice on as you go along, but you really can't count on them any more or any less than anyone else in life. Not really. Just wait until the Will gets read, for example...

[Amanda22]

My sister responded that she thinks no differently of me than she did before and doesn't judge anyone. I think she's right about that, BTW. She said it doesn't matter a bit to her what I wear. I couldn't have hoped for a better response. I think this might actually bring us together.

I really appreciate everyone's responses. It helped me so much.

[t-girlxsophie]

I'm sooo happy that everything worked out the way you had hoped.People are still able to surprise us when we least expect them to,and I hope it brings you both closer together

Sophie

[Kathi Lake]

Amanda, that is wonderful news! I'm hoping that this will lead to more and better communication between you, and some reconciliation in your family. As one survivor of a dysfunctional family to another, this sure sounds good, and I'm happy for you!

:)

Kathi