Some are Making this Tougher for Us!

[Sarasometimes]

Yesterday, in my never ending quest to visit even more CD friendly salons I got a hard "brush" off (no pun intended). I past by a cute looking day spa, grab thier number from the sign and called. A pleasant voice answered and when asked said that they do do roller sets. I began to explain that it was for a wig and that I wanted it styled while I was wearing (this is strongly paraphrased). The tone changed and I was accussed of scamming them in the past and no thankyou. Well I of course wasn't the offending party someone had been. I was enmale so I stopped by to clarify.
I got such a great response. They explained that someone on occasion will call and book several services and no show. The phone is valid but there is no answer when they tried to confirm. I was introduced to a stylist that was a pro at sets and they asked for my name so in the future they could accomodate me (the appointment slot I needed for today was booked). After a profuse apology from the receptionist which I returned on behalf of our community, she said that they looked forward to serving me.
We need to remember if we aren't in a position to be pioneers (still closeted..), we still need to avoid giving what we do a bad or worse reputation. if you are accommodated while shopping do try to buy something. If you arrange for services be courteous (we all have to cancel sometimes, just make the call).
Sure there are some here who will disagree that we owe them nothing more than what a gg needs to do. Well that may be in a perfect world but I don't live in one of those. we need to realize that sometimes how we are treated is based on how the someone was treated by a rep from our community.
Sorry for the rant, Sara

[Tina B.]

I'm sorry you had such a hassle getting your appointment, but that some body you mention may not of been a member of this community, it might have been just a prank call, and even if it where a member of this community does not make their treatment of you right. Why should I, or you have to answer for every crack pot that might be out there? If I have to answer for anything done by a member of a group I belong to, I'll spend the rest of my life apologizing for things I had nothing to do with, I'm a white American male, as such I just don't have the time to apologize for everything that group has done, even in my life time, never mind before. Have you ever heard the song, I didn't F*&k it up, did you F*&k it, up? (look it up on utube) Well I didn't F*&k it up!
Tina B.

[Sara Jessica]

I'll keep this simple...

Any interactions we have with the muggles are easily affected by their previous experiences with our community, good, bad or indifferent. Conversely, those same interactions have the potential to pave the way for future perceptions of others who follow in our wake.

[Cynthia Anne]

Hi Sarah! Prank calls have been around for as long as the telephone has been! I doubt that one of 'us' made that call! For we have much better things to do! Such as getting our hair-do or our nails done! Hugs!

[AllieSF]

Actually, I think it may be more common than we want to think that one of "us" would be a no show. I have tried to meet sisters before in drab or drag and they were no shows with no phone call. So, now I say I will be glad to meet them, but if they get cold feet or have other complications, I can understand that, but they have to notify me before I plan on getting ready. If they do not, I will never meet with them. If they call, I will give them more chances. Why? Because for most CD's getting out of their safe zone house is one of the hardest things they have ever done en femme. So, cold feet at the last minute is common for the newbies going out or meeting a fellow sister for the first time. I can easily see this happening to a service provider too.

[docrobbysherry]

Unfortunately, Allie is correct!
I just came from another CD site. While visiting, I read a brand new thread posted there. About a dresser who made a supreme effort to look her absolute best! The occasion was meeting another CD she had corresponded with online.

A no-sho no-call left her discouraged, disappointed, and possibly a little heart broken! Sadly, some of us r OBVIOUSLY still MEN at heart!

[AllieSF]

Actually Sherry, to me it is not a only man thing. It is just an inconsiderate act by someone who should treat those who want to help them better. Women and men do it in different scenarios. On this site, we are mainly talking about MtF CD's. But inconsiderate people come in all shapes, sizes and genders, especially if there is a fear factor involved.

[Hope]

I'll keep this simple...

Any interactions we have with the muggles are easily affected by their previous experiences with our community, good, bad or indifferent. Conversely, those same interactions have the potential to pave the way for future perceptions of others who follow in our wake.

The muggles - I love it.

And you are absolutely, positively, correct.

Whenever I see a double take, or a giggle - I make sure to give the person a big smile - I know that they are laughing because they don't know how else to react and they are just burning off nervous energy. I want their first interaction with a trans person to be positive - so I make sure that it is.

Being out and trans in the world today is sort of like being a woman in the working world in the 1950's. We have to be twice as good and expect half the rewards. It's not fair - but it is the way it is.


Actually, I think it may be more common than we want to think that one of "us" would be a no show. I have tried to meet sisters before in drab or drag and they were no shows with no phone call. So, now I say I will be glad to meet them, but if they get cold feet or have other complications, I can understand that, but they have to notify me before I plan on getting ready. If they do not, I will never meet with them. If they call, I will give them more chances. Why? Because for most CD's getting out of their safe zone house is one of the hardest things they have ever done en femme. So, cold feet at the last minute is common for the newbies going out or meeting a fellow sister for the first time. I can easily see this happening to a service provider too.

When I am setting up a "date" with a girl for the first time I always tell her the same thing I was told by one of the first girls I met "come however you are comfortable." I have never had a no-show.

[Vickie_CDTV]

If I had been talked to like that on the phone and accused of scamming them, I would have never given them my business. I am sorry if it happened to them before, and as someone who is self employed I have had the same happen to me, but there is no excuse for treating a potential client like that.