Jealousy

[Jaelle]

I have to say that of all the things I could be jealous about with my CDing SO, the biggest one would be his collection of shoes. I find myself at times wishing that my feet were bigger so I could wear his shoes...

What are you most jealous of in regards to your SO's CD'ing?

[wadevikingfan]

well i just spend the extra five minutes in the shower shaving my legs..not a big deal to me...just a routine thing to me...and my gg freind likes the look..she thinks i have better looking legs than her..i think that is where a lot of jealosy may come from...us cross dressers spend more time and effort to look pretty..and gg's..they are bored being women...want the easy way out..


wendy

[suzy1]

Get him to treat you to some new shoes Jaelle. He sounds like he is hogging it a bit?

Have fun, SUZY

[CDPheobe]

I can say that my wife says she is jealous sometimes because I do look better dressed than she does in the same clothes. She claims my legs look better,and i shave better. I just told her I'm sorry. I just take more time to look sexy. I adore my wife and love her unconditionally. I told her nothing to be jealous of. I'm not aiming to look better. Just feel good about how I am dressed up.

[Jaelle]

He is hogging the shoes a bit, but that's okay as I can't wear heals, but he can! I do admit I am envious of his amazing legs, but I got the boobs! hehe

[Presh GG]

Excuse me wadevikingfan,
What exactly do you mean we Genetic Women are "bored " being women and " Want the easy way out ??"

Please elaborate.
And may I ask how you would know this ?
Presh GG

[nini]

Well, bored and so on as I may be, LOL, I just don't always want to make a show of how I look. Sometimes I feel like a jeans and a sweater, nothing fancy, no make-up, because that is what I feel comfortable in. But I have friends that use make-up every day, I just don't feel the urge to. I look pretty without make-up too :)
And then it does feel special when I use make-up for a change as well.

[Momarie]

Here we go again...

Another back handed insult to GGs, we're "bored with being women and take the easy way out".
We're "jealous" etc.

Transparent misogyny.

[Jaelle]

You know, I really didn't take it as an insult but as someone's opinion however misinformed and misguided it might be. It's just an opinion. So perhaps instead of trying to turn this topic into a ticking time bomb of hurt feelings, perhaps we can get back to the original point of discussion. Jealousy.

[BRANDYJ]

GG's are bored being women? Seems to me, if anyone is bored being anything, it's the TG's that are bored and from this boredom they try to look as much like a GG as they can. notice I did not say "we" when referring to TG's since the idea of being bored is not what motivates me to be a CD/TG. Gee, if the GG's were bored being women, ya think they might be the ones to crossdress! I'm sorry, I think this was a foolish statement to make about what I adore, admire, respect and cherish. I won't even go into "taking the easy way out" statement. What the heck is that supposed to mean?
Simply stated, a GG does not have to work as hard to look like a woman. She does not have to wear makeup and shave everyday to look fantastic, or even remotely like a woman for the simple fact she is.

Seems to me wadevikingfan needs to be careful of his choice of words and be more respectful to our beloved GG members. Sorry that in your opinion , women do not dress to the nines just to please you. A beautiful woman looks good in a burlap bag and does not need to conform to anyone's idea of how a woman should dress. Clothes do not make the woman as you might foolishly think. Now go put on a three piece suit, polish your shoes, shave your face and put on some Aqua Velvet to show the GG's you are not bored being a man. Or are you taking the easy way out?:eek:

[Nikki_Girl]

I'm somewhat envious that he gets such joy out of things that to me are just routine. I haven't thought about makeup being exciting since I was very young and my mom started letting me use it. Now its just something I do every morning after brushing my teeth, no big deal. Same for shaved legs, just an extra 5 minutes in the shower for me, but seemingly the greatest thing in the world to him!

I never thought of it that way before. But everything about our feminine side is so exciting to us.

[gailb]

I`m jealous of my wife because she can openly wear her long ankle length tired gypsy / boho style skirt in public , they are my fetish , I have 15 of them but only have the guts to wear one at home , god what i wouldnt give feel the freedom of a boho skirt whilst walking down the street.

[Presh GG]

ok jaelle,

On your question of jealosy...as you persist , read between the lines Absolutly Nothing.

We are women, so why the jealosy ?
PS
This has been done to death over the years , please look at the subject.
Presh GG

[Jaelle]

ok jaelle,
PS
This has been done to death over the years , please look at the subject.
Presh GG

Yes it may have been done to death over the years, but look at my join date. I'm new to the board, so for good impressions sake cut me some slack. Chances are a previous Jealousy post is buried in the board. But sometimes it's good to revisit past posts and start a new one because people's views change or you have a new person like me who hasn't had the time to dive into the old posts to see if I'm duplicating. If you want to bitch about it, fine. Just don't expect me to respond to you further as I came here to learn, not to be attacked by some stranger because I'm new.

[Sandra]

Ok calm it down folks please.

[Presh GG]

I'm very sorry if you took it as an attack. It has been a hot topic as of late, but you see being jealous means you " envy ' and I prefer just to enjoy the gang without thinking one is better than another.

I'm very sorry if it sounded mean ... gotta go advanced to get out the smilys and devils...

Welcome to the board .,

Presh GG

[Jaelle]

I apologize for taking it as an attack. It is hard to judge a persons tone via just plain words on a screen.

[Sandra]

Awwww group :gh: Okay that's enough. :D:


On the subject, I am not jealous of anything about Nigella and never have been, she is who she is, she is no better than me as I am no better than her.

[Stephanie47]

I know my wife is envious of anyone able to wear high heels. She had two foot surgeries, which resulted in a fused toe. So, heels are out. She comments all the time when we are together at the mall about how nice heels look on women. Of course, after she would come down from hitting the ceiling, she would be envious of my 4 1/2 inch black heels, and, the white ones too.

[Mimi]

I am envious of the fact that my SO can enjoy wearing something that looks great but might not be physically comfortable. I think there are visual dressers and tactile dressers (for want of better terms, and this includes everybody, not just CDers or GGs)--people who enjoy wearing something for the way it looks, despite the way it physically feels (not how it makes them feel mentally), as opposed to people who dress for the physical way the clothes feel. For example, I am much more comfortable in jeans because I don't like the feel of open air on my skin. I am more comfortable in flats or sneakers because I don't like to have my toes feel pinched. I might buy something flashy and think I'd love to wear it, but when the time comes, I'll find myself thinking "not today, it's too cold/hot/windy/too far to walk" and pick something familiar to wear instead. So I am envious of people (including my SO) who can get enjoyment out of wearing something that looks great but would be uncomfortable to wear.

[JodieGreen]

It is hard to judge a persons tone via just plain words on a screen.

Should try that with autism some time.

[ReineD]

I envy the ability to become someone else for awhile. Well, she's not really someone else since she is the same person he is inside, but you know what I mean. I would like to derive as much sheer pleasure out of transforming myself as she does when she dresses. That's got to add a kick to life! :)

Also, I'd love to have the financial resources to put a premium on pretty clothes, shoes, and jewelry, without feeling guilty about it. I've rarely been able to indulge without feeling as if I am being extravagant, even during the pre-kids phase of my life when all I had to think of was myself. There were just so many other things to do with the money. :p

[Sophie86]

What are you most jealous of in regards to your SO's CD'ing?

The fact that she can wear jeans and a t-shirt and no one considers it crossdressing (anymore), but just let me put on a dress... :p

[Jaelle]

Should try that with autism some time.

My son's half brother is autistic, so I get what you are saying.

Reine, I'm starting to get the idea we think a long the same lines. To be able have that kind of pleasure when transforming has to be awesome :)

[ReineD]

Jaelle, I just had another thought and I'd like to share it, although I'm sure it doesn't apply to you. But, it does deal with the tired notion that CDs are sexier than their wives. lol

A few years ago I was in a conversation with a GG who felt she was overweight and not tall enough. Her SO was slim and was maybe one or two dress sizes less than she was, and was taller. Anyway, this GG kept saying she was jealous of her SO because he looked better dressed than she did, and she hated this.

So, I asked her: how would she feel standing next to another GG who was two sizes smaller, and taller than she was. Would she feel as envious? This GG then told me she had never thought of it that way before. lol. It turned out it wasn't her SO that she was envious of so much as anyone who was skinnier and taller than she was. She was just so focused on her SO's CDing that she couldn't separate it from her own feelings of self worth, independent from her SO. I also asked how she would compare if she exercised and also ramped up her wardrobe, bought all the pretty underthings, had makeovers, did her hair, nails, practiced walking in heels, etc, how would she then compare? :) She hadn't thought of that either.

I haven't seen this GG here for years, but hopefully she has learned to focus more on herself and less on her SO. :D

In terms of the CDers who believe themselves sexier than their wives ... hmmm. I wonder, if you asked their wives (provided of course the wives don't have self-esteem issues), if they feel the same way. :rolleyes:

[BRANDYJ]

I envy the ability to become someone else for awhile. Well, she's not really someone else since she is the same person he is inside, but you know what I mean. I would like to derive as much sheer pleasure out of transforming myself as she does when she dresses. That's got to add a kick to life! :)

Also, I'd love to have the financial resources to put a premium on pretty clothes, shoes, and jewelry, without feeling guilty about it. I've rarely been able to indulge without feeling as if I am being extravagant, even during the pre-kids phase of my life when all I had to think of was myself. There were just so many other things to do with the money. :p

I find your envy about being able to be someone else for awhile interesting Reine. Can't you become someone else for awhile too? not sure it has to be crossdressing, but maybe become a cowgirl, waitress, maid or whatever type of person you might like to be for awhile. Not sure iwouldld be the same thing since we are compelled to dress and act like women where-as, I'm sure most GG's are not compelled to be someone else the same way we TG's do. So I wonder...can't you transform yourself to be someone else too?

I envy the simple fact that GG's can wear a skirt, dress omultitudetude of different style pants from flared leg to jeans and no one thinks less of you. I envy that you can wear makeup to look your best or not wear it and no one takes a second look to humiliate you or think you are strange in any way. I guess what I'm saying is I envy the very wide choice in clothes for GG's that are perfectly acceptable in public.
As for jealousy...NO, I am not the least bit jealous of my SO in any way. And I know there is nothing about me for her to be jealous about either.

[Sophie86]

But, it does deal with the tired notion that CDs are sexier than their wives. lol

That's emphatically not the case around here. :)


I also asked how she would compare if she exercised and also ramped up her wardrobe, bought all the pretty underthings, had makeovers, did her hair, nails, practiced walking in heels, etc, how would she then compare? :) She hadn't thought of that either.

Good point!

[ReineD]

Brandy, I'd like to be able to somehow put myself in a joyful "space" (I should have said this instead of 'transforming'), to the same degree and with the same level of thrill and self-fulfillment as I read many CDers derive from the dressing. I could have sorely used such an outlet in the last few years. :sad:

I suppose it is achievable through some disciplines, yoga perhaps, but this does take years of practice and it doesn't guarantee the same level of bliss. Some people can throw themselves into a discipline they love, such as music or art, where they can forget all their cares and just "be", but I do think this is rare for the average person. Art can transform me spiritually in the same way, but unfortunately I need to be free of cares and worries in order to get there, so I haven't been able to use Art in the last few years in order to "transform" myself, or rather, my mood. The inspiration was gone.

I've seen my SO positively aglow with being who she is, no matter what was going on in her life, and I've only experienced something like this a few times in my life: marriage, childbirth, the flush of 'new love' with my SO, major successes at work. It would be nice to have the ability to reach this 'space' on a daily basis just by changing my clothes. I don't say this with any negative undertones. It really is enviable.

As to GGs being allowed to wear makeup and skirts, it is a little besides the point I was making, but yes, it is unfortunate that some CDers are occasionally met with derision when they dress. But not all CDs are. My SO goes out several times per week in full makeup and in beautiful clothes and she is always treated with utmost respect. She even has become friends with the people who frequent the same places she goes to. You should try it sometime! :)

[Presh GG]

Hi Jaelle,
:heehee:
Being as you're new I've got to clue you in. HA Ha , Really You'll get a kick out of this

SOME of the gals here really do think they look better... are "sexier" ... are prettyer,...on and on , than their wifes or the random women on the street. . I'm serious ! No kidding .:D
This is where you came in , when the ykw hit the fan.

I do welcome you and I hope you like it here , I'm truelly glad you came, And I'm sure given time you too will know the diamonds and the nuts.

Jealousy is a 4 letter word ... WHAT ????? :devil:
Presh GG

[GG Kathy]

I will admit I am jealous of my SO's legs they are gorgeous.

[ReineD]

Be careful GG Kathy! When you say something like this around here, it can be taken entirely out of context by some. :p