Mikaela
06-29-2011, 03:37 PM
So a couple weeks ago, I mentioned coming out to my ex-wife about a situation that required me explaining the CDing so that I could get the best advice possible under the circumstances.
The situation was that there was a woman I liked, who liked me a lot both as Kae and Mike (although more Mikaela at the time). I wanted my ex's thoughts on the matter (she's always encouraged me to be happy and date, etc, so it isn't a conflict like it would be for some people). I had conflict because I still have walls up and I didn't know how I felt with being liked for my girl side more (again, at the time). She encouraged me unconditionally and told me to not be a retard, have fun, live in the moment, etc. So, I did! And lucky me, ex-wifey even still checks to make sure I'm not being stupid and that things are going well.
Although the woman I'm dating isn't a 'tran chaser', she has a lot of friends in the community and has used club time as a 'safe' place where she really doesn't need to worry about being picked up, etc. So yes, she's fine with my femme side and even knows 'her' better than 'him', although that's been changing lately. As she's said, it's always me, just different accessories. It's been really nice and I've been really happy lately.
We've done some dates with me in boy mode, girl mode has been restricted to club nights only, but things changed yesterday!
We're going to be going to a glow event at a nightclub in hollywood on the 9th, so I needed to get some more clubby/glowy clothes/ideas for that. The goal was to go to the mall as Mikaela for my first time out in the daylight. I dressed casual (stripey top, jeans, flats, day makeup) instead of the slightly more night time look I do for club at Shine.
I drove up to Burbank to pick her up and when we finally got out the door, I drove us to the mall there. It went pretty uneventful actually. I paid more attention to talking to her then trying to figure out who was making me or not. Then again, I'm taller than her by a bit, so we probably just looked like mismatched lesbians, too.
We went into some various shops and got called out as "Hi ladies,..." so that was nice.
In one of the shops, I even went and tried some things on with no issues from anyone. I don't even recall any double-checks, although I'm sure I was clocked here and there. One thing I learned about trying on clothes is that it is evil to your hair.
I didn't even get any stares, so all in all, that's a success in my book. I don't care/think I pass, my motto is to just be below the radar as much as I can, and I succeeded there. I didn't even get a lot (couple inappropriately short skirts that will require wearing dance shorts under them and a mesh top), but I'll ride back up there tonight (in boy mode) to get some of the accessories we saw without me being self conscious on interacting with people.
I didn't get the rush like I did the first time I went out at night, since I loathe malls and shopping anyway, but at least it was a milestone that wasn't unpleasant.
I didn't really take any pics, though, so I might have one or two from the phone (the close up in the car is after 8 hours so beardshadow is starting to creep). I tried with my real camera, but didn't like how they turned out. Will check that again tonight, though.
The situation was that there was a woman I liked, who liked me a lot both as Kae and Mike (although more Mikaela at the time). I wanted my ex's thoughts on the matter (she's always encouraged me to be happy and date, etc, so it isn't a conflict like it would be for some people). I had conflict because I still have walls up and I didn't know how I felt with being liked for my girl side more (again, at the time). She encouraged me unconditionally and told me to not be a retard, have fun, live in the moment, etc. So, I did! And lucky me, ex-wifey even still checks to make sure I'm not being stupid and that things are going well.
Although the woman I'm dating isn't a 'tran chaser', she has a lot of friends in the community and has used club time as a 'safe' place where she really doesn't need to worry about being picked up, etc. So yes, she's fine with my femme side and even knows 'her' better than 'him', although that's been changing lately. As she's said, it's always me, just different accessories. It's been really nice and I've been really happy lately.
We've done some dates with me in boy mode, girl mode has been restricted to club nights only, but things changed yesterday!
We're going to be going to a glow event at a nightclub in hollywood on the 9th, so I needed to get some more clubby/glowy clothes/ideas for that. The goal was to go to the mall as Mikaela for my first time out in the daylight. I dressed casual (stripey top, jeans, flats, day makeup) instead of the slightly more night time look I do for club at Shine.
I drove up to Burbank to pick her up and when we finally got out the door, I drove us to the mall there. It went pretty uneventful actually. I paid more attention to talking to her then trying to figure out who was making me or not. Then again, I'm taller than her by a bit, so we probably just looked like mismatched lesbians, too.
We went into some various shops and got called out as "Hi ladies,..." so that was nice.
In one of the shops, I even went and tried some things on with no issues from anyone. I don't even recall any double-checks, although I'm sure I was clocked here and there. One thing I learned about trying on clothes is that it is evil to your hair.
I didn't even get any stares, so all in all, that's a success in my book. I don't care/think I pass, my motto is to just be below the radar as much as I can, and I succeeded there. I didn't even get a lot (couple inappropriately short skirts that will require wearing dance shorts under them and a mesh top), but I'll ride back up there tonight (in boy mode) to get some of the accessories we saw without me being self conscious on interacting with people.
I didn't get the rush like I did the first time I went out at night, since I loathe malls and shopping anyway, but at least it was a milestone that wasn't unpleasant.
I didn't really take any pics, though, so I might have one or two from the phone (the close up in the car is after 8 hours so beardshadow is starting to creep). I tried with my real camera, but didn't like how they turned out. Will check that again tonight, though.