The things that dreams are made of.... You've got to hear this one...

[RenneB]

This one, I just have to share with y’all.

Last night’s dream was the first time I have ever dreamed that I was actually a GG. But first let me back up a little. I’m currently at the half century mark on this rock and have been a CDer ever since the age of 5. You know the story, dress, hide, purge. On and off for most of my life. The last 15 years were off so that I could find a SO and raise a family.

However, the past year has dealt a downturn in the economy and I ended up in the house all day, alone, without a job. Believe me, searhing for a job is hard than having one. Anyways, being home alone what’s an ol’ CDer to do? So I jumped on line and started getting the wardrobe back. This time, in style, shoes that fit, nails, hair, silicone forms… the works.

Since I’m a closet CD, dressing en fem was limited to Monday to Friday from 9 in the morning to 2 in the after noon as the SO is at work and the bioreplacements are in school. A unique opportunity came last week as the SO was out of town for three weeks. I figured, hey I remember back in my single days when I’d dress en fem go to bed and have some wild dream (nightmare) about getting outed. I’d wake up the next morning and say to myself, don’t get outed, put my girly clothes back in the closet and wait for next weekend.

So I started getting dressed for bed with forms, hip pads, nails and a slip and off to dream land. Well every morning for the past two weeks I’d wake up remembering the same type of dream that I used to have, of being outed (worst fear ever). That is until last night.

I was (in dreamland) running around the house getting my stuff ready to go to high school. I stopped for a moment and turned to look in the mirror hanging on the wall and there she was. A burnette that I had never seen before. She’s about 16 with medium length burnette hair, slightly pulled back and a light blue spring dress on. I thought, is this me? I smiled and the reflection smiled back at me. It, I mean she, was me.

Mom said to me “come on girl, you’re going to be late for school”. I turned away from the mirror and kept running around the house gathering my stuff up. I remember telling her, “Mom, one of my nails isn’t the right color, I need to find my polish.” She replied “oh just fix it in the car dear”.

Wow, was this really happening to me I thought? Have I gone back in time and crossed over? And then, I woke up. What seemed like a new life for me, vanished in an instant. I layed there in bed this morning for a few moments, cupping my forms in my hands and thinking, thank you brain for that experience. It was one of the most vivid dreams I’ve had in a while and this one embodied everything I could wish for. Youth, femininity, and acceptance. I can’t wait for tonight’s sleep show.

How about y’all…. Ever sleep en fem about a life that could have been…?

[smokin brit]

That sounds like a very nice dream, wish I had that

[Marcie Close]

I've not had that experience, but I'm happy you are happy. My experience has been quite different. I didn't try dressing up as a small child, but rather in my late teens. It started when I began emulating Rock bands in the seventies, you know the ones who were androgynous. Since then I never gave it much thought because I married in my early twenties and adopted a so-called normal male lifestyle. However, I was always different and whatever I wore had to be stylish and edgy. Now I am a widower and the kids are grown. Unfortunately even though I have this new personal freedom I am restricted by financial circumstances, so I am closeted because I live with relatives, that soon will change by God's grace and I should be in my own place. For the pass year I have been slowly experimenting with dressing in feminine attire. For every day wear I prefer a mix of feminine and masculine, but once I'm by myself I plan to go all the way whenever I want or need to. Another way I've ventured out is online and I've posted a number of pictures of me dressed like a woman and I've gotten a number of compliments which pleases me greatly. It lets me know that I'm on the right track. I also know that God is on my side and leading me in this direction because it just feels right. The other day I dressed in my sexiest girl clothes and wig and it felt so good even though I was behind closed doors in my bedroom it was the happiest I had been in a long time. My only concern is how to tell my children their dad is a drag queen. That is a problem I wil face soon enough.

[Persephone]

Sounds like a wonderful experience, Renne!

I find it very interesting that you were clearly the woman in the mirror and yet she didn't look like you nor did you seem to recognize her as someone in your life. That suggests to me that what you experienced wasn't a "dream" but an astral projection. Instead of dreaming about being someone else you actually were, at least for a few moments, a "guest" in someone else's life, riding along inside of her.

There is a website (click here) (http://www.kajama.com/index.php?file=columndetail&Id=2C984766-E391-4E7A-B07B-6D4F6C398BA0&ColumnID=3BA2858B-4A47-11D5-BAAA-00C04FA0788A) where two women interpret a similar dream. One of the women, Susyn, sees it as a possible projection like I do. The other one, Astrea, interprets it as a dream.

Astrea's thoughts are pretty interesting. Here are some snippets from what she wrote, you can see the entire page by clicking on the blue text above.

"In the old dream books, if you dream of being a man, then you're letting a man control your waking life, and if you dream of being a woman, the opposite is happening. The dream you're having where you're seeing through someone else's eyes is not uncommon."

"Most dream analysts agree that when we dream of seeing through someone else's eyes or being someone else, there is some area of our lives in which we're not dealing honestly with ourselves or others. Dreaming of being someone else either means we wish we were a different person, or we wish we could behave towards others in a different way."

"For instance, dreaming that you're a man when you're a woman might mean that you wish you could handle your problems in a more forceful or masculine way. Dreaming you're a woman when you're a man might point out a need for softness and caring in your life."

Please do let us know if you continue to have these experiences/dreams!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Cynthia Anne]

WOW! Very interesting! That's the kind of dream a girl can wish she never woke up from! I hate that when it happens! Hugs!

[kimdl93]

I've had dreams where I'm dressed, and partly accepted, but frustrated by repeated encounters with people I'm hiding this from. I'd rather have your dream!

[RenneB]

Thanks so much girls for the thoughts and ideas. I'm glad I can be soo honest with y'all. I checked out that web site and now, at bedtime will purposely think of the astreal projection and see what happens. I can only hope...

Renne.....