Just not ready yet?

[Jskylar]

Recently my best friend has been acting out. I swear, I feel like I am married to her and I am having misses problems.
I have been very down lately. I have identified as male for 2 years now. But I'm just not ready yet. To tell my family to start transition. I really want to transition more than anything but It's not easy to just jump out and loose everything like that. Essentially I will loose my family and loved ones. Because they are not tolerant.
My best friend though, she is stared being a pain in the ass. She says that I choose to be this way because I won't come out to everyone. She also tells me I have no reason to feel down because of all the druggies out their on the streets.
Nevertheless I have worked in healthcare long enough to know that she is full rubbish and that mental conditions are just a serious as physical ones. But that's it I have lost my one person I talked to about these things.
As down as I feel about things and life right now. Coming out is just not something I feel I can do right now.
Sorry to be posting so much on the boards it's just going to be skylar problems week.

[brylram]

My personal experiences, as well as many accounts from others, have made it clear to me that any strength you are missing will come FROM transition. If you wait until you feel strong and ready it's possible you never will... at some point you are just going to need to decide to start, and then do it. When I started transitioning I lost all the friends I had, got my life threatened (with police involvement), and was convinced I would be murdered for being trans by my early 20s. I basically just took the stance of 'I am male, I can't live otherwise' and went forward ready to deal with the consequences. I'm glad I did, because the longer I'm on T the more stress, fear, and shortcomings just slide away.

You may lose people along the way, but ultimately they'll be people you need to lose. The ones who are worth caring about will come back.

[mistunderstood]

It is ok to vent that is what we are here for. Brylram is right sometimes you have to just do what you have to do. I found the more I question my-self the more I am able to be comfortable with my decisions I make. Hang in there it will get better.

[Felix]

Hya Mate I feel for ya really and you moan all ya want :) I waited all my life and started transition when I was 42. They was long painful years denying who I really was for fear of loosing all the things you have talked about. I agree with Brylram those who really love ya will be the ones who will come back even if they sherk away initially I've seen it many times with peeps now :) At the end of the day its a very personal choice when ya transition and the time has to be right for you :) The time was right for me three years ago and I'm so glad I did it and jumped off the cliff and started my transition :) .... Felix