Contacted by my old step mother, heres the messages...

[Myojine]

Copy pasted from facebook.


14 hours ago
Beth (Named Edited)

How come you don't use your "given" name and why does your profile say you are a female?
..








8 hours ago
Diclonius (my named edited)


Miss Mayfeild, You are the step mother i knew until i was i think 14 years old.
You called me joseph, but I dont go by that name anymore.
I am whats called by medical science a "Transgender" person.
most basically under stood as "a girl trapped in a boys body."
Scientifically theorized as a major birth defect that causes a male body to develope but the brain remains in "female" state and developes as such.
I have had to live with this my entire life and its extremely distressing to the point where I have attempted suicide over the issue(twice).

In less technical terms. I was supose to be a girl, and I was supose to be kristi's big sister, not her brother.
As soon as i can I will begin transitioning to female so i no longer have to deal with the extremely distressing, and often times descrived as "fatal/lethal" by those who specialize in gender psychology and research.

If you have ANY questions, feel free to ask. I actually was asking kristi about talking to you, but she said that you probably didnt want to talk to me and i should just let you contact me instead.
..








11 minutes ago
Beth (Named edited)


what is this "Miss Mayfield" crap? I have to say that I totally disagree with what you told me about your life. If you were to get help, you would be living the life you were given by God and not defy him. And Kristi is right, I don't want to talk to you after this message and would appreciate it if you would not communicate with Kristi either. What you are doing is not healthy and this doesn't need to involve my daughter. Everything you said is a bunch of garbage and you need to get help, consider it. Do not contact me any further and don't continue disgracing yourself. I don't know who filled your head with such bs but I feel sorry for you listening to them. Live your own life as you know you should, which is what you were given when you were born. DO NOT CONTACT ME OR KRISTI AGAIN

[Angel.Marie76]

Wow.. what bitter bologna. How are you taking it? I don't know how close you were to this person, but it sounds to me like they don't want to be very close to you right now/anymore. I'm sorry for that if you indeed were trying to make it work.

Sounds very standoffish to me. If you have maintained any particular amount of communication with these people, expect there to be more lashing out, as that's what's common once you start to see this.

[Myojine]

Heres my reply back to her.

I'm sorry, I didn't think the "Miss Mayfield" referance would be offencive... Actually I was saying it out of respect, and doubt. I wasn't sure what to call you. I havent seen you in over... 7 years now...

I beleive what you asked for when you contacted me was for the truth. Well thanks to my beleifs, the truth and honesty is what I stand by. I will not lie to please others, and I will not hide the truth from anyones eyes.
So I want you to know something.
I have been diagnosed, several times, by different doctors with "Aspergers syndrome" which is in effect, a form of autism.
Im also severly bipolar, I have moderate dyslexia with features of dysgraphia and dyspraxia.
While I was in foster care, I saw therpaist after therapist. They all said the same thing, the same diagnosis over and over again.
"aspergers syndrome" "transgender" "bipolar disorder" No one put theses ideas in my head. Infact denoting that aspergers syndrome is a cause of higher intellect, highetended usage of logical thought processes, and social ineptitude, the assumption that I would be influenceded by other peopple, is a very unlikely senerio.
Are you a board certfied psychologist? a Psychiatric speciallist? Do you have a PHD in psychology? I wouldn't know, but from the very hurtful words you wrote to me, it would seem that you don't.
How can you stand back and say things in which medical science says the opposite?
Elizabeth, you remember my childhood far better than I do, I know you remember how much of an intellectual I was. I know you remember how much of a reader and researcher I was.
As a whole populous, my intellect far outshines the majority, I am not one to make ignorant assumptions.
Kristi is my sister, she is my blood, and like it or not,she is blood related to me.
You dont even know who I am, and you are judging me to condemnation.
I know you are still a Latter Day Saint, I know you still attend church, and if so you better pull out that bible and look up
Deuteronomy 5:6-21.
Because the last time I checked
20 Neither shalt thou bear false witness against thy neighbour.
And also the last time I checked, Whem Mary Magdalen the prostitute was condemed to be stoned, Jesus, your shining light and example, stepped forth and said "Let him without sin cast the first stone"
Who are to judge before the lord himself have judged me?
You have no right to do so.
God loves all his children, not just some of them. God doesn't hate me because I was born this way.

You were my mother, and at one time in my life, I needed you more than anything else on this planet. Is this something you regret?

[Annaliese]

You were wrong to call her Miss Mayfeild, B!!!! would have been better Closer, She is not a nice person.

[Gina X]

Well said Myojine, it is a great pity that we have to have people like this in our lives. Personally I had a bigot for a step father who didn't speak to me for over 15 years and when we did eventually talk it was mainly for my mothers sake and when he died there was no sympathy from me. I do take some comfort in the "sit by the river" saying which I have put in my signature and in my life so far has proved to be very true. We don't need/want people like this in our lives and can survive quite well without them, but when I was younger I thought everyone had to like me and would go out of my way to make them but now with the wisdom (?) of age, to coin a phrase, I don't give a damn, they either like me warts and all or they don't, it is their choice LOL

[Melody Moore]

My own familly are the biggest bunch of bigots, but what can you do except walk away?

You can't change other people's minds or attitudes, it'd just a waste of time you just have to
live with. people like that are not worth the time & the effort you have already wasted on them.

[Pythos]

If you are still on good terms with Kristi...screw what this old hatefilled, ignorant person "ordered" you to do. In fact you shoud contact this woman and say "I put up with enough orders serving this country, I sure as hell don't need more coming from you!!!, I'll contact whoever a please"

Sorry you had to deal with such a disrespectfull piec of refuse.

The funny thing is she is a Step mother, which means she most likely has divorce in her backround....that is also not permitted in the old testiment. Well at least not in the manner we do divorce now a days.

[Inna]

Myojine, you are a brave and wonderful human being, your restrain and poise are an example of love and serenity this world so needs. Through your actions you represent true spirituality and for those who show anger and condemnation, you extend you helping hand and a smile. Those who call love as their own are indeed lost and blind yet those who allow love to radiate through their hearts and actions are alive!

Miss Mayfield is her self, lost and her spirit confined by misunderstood cultural stigma.

Babe, your love and belief in truth proves your path to be just, and I hope that such incident, especially involving someone who should be extremely supportive, does not take away the wind, from underneath your angel wings.

All the love baby! Inna.

[Cindi Johnson]

Other than our spouses and children, we don't need to explain or justify our existence to anyone. Not anyone! And as for this "God" guy (you know, the one who's always so judgmental towards us), I for one don't need to justify my existence to Him either.

[Chickhe]

I always found the 'god' judgements to be nonsense. Who is to say that if there is a 'god' didn't want you to CD. In all the drawings I have seen, gods son wears long hair, a dress and sandals... so was he a CDer or not? He did say not to judge others though...

[Schatten Lupus]

I always found the 'god' judgements to be nonsense. Who is to say that if there is a 'god' didn't want you to CD. In all the drawings I have seen, gods son wears long hair, a dress and sandals... so was he a CDer or not? He did say not to judge others though...
Well, in my experience most people who call themselves a Christian don't actually fit the bill. And while many of them know the verses "man shall not lay with man" and "a man shall not wear that which pertains unto a woman" they over look many rules that are also laid down in the Bible. "Judge not" being one of the main ones. And of course to them God guides everything, but when it's something they don't like or agree with then suddenly it's no longer "God's guidance" but a taint and blaspheme of the devil. I think if there is a Jesus, he will be too busy arguing with biggest part of his "followers" on why they won't join him during the 1,000 year reign to spend any time with his real followers.
You handled it well Myojine. Unfortunately such people do not like having their own words thrown in their face, and you can't change them.

[Mikaela]

I always found the 'god' judgements to be nonsense. Who is to say that if there is a 'god' didn't want you to CD. In all the drawings I have seen, gods son wears long hair, a dress and sandals... so was he a CDer or not? He did say not to judge others though...

I'm an atheist, so I'm biased. That out of the way, people put God in their own image, not the other way around. Two different people can say God doesn't make mistakes with regards to a CD/TS, but mean it differently based on how they want it to be interepreted. One can mean "The CD/TS is meant to be a CD/TS, so support her/him" and the other can mean "Act the gender of your physical appearance."

It's the rule of nature that all animals isolate out those that are perceived weaker or different, often killing outsiders. It's the human animal that has created non-familial memes (nationalism, race, religion, gender bigotry, sexual bigotry, etc) to replace those original instincts.

[Myojine]

Well, in my experience most people who call themselves a Christian don't actually fit the bill. And while many of them know the verses "man shall not lay with man" and "a man shall not wear that which pertains unto a woman" they over look many rules that are also laid down in the Bible. "Judge not" being one of the main ones. And of course to them God guides everything, but when it's something they don't like or agree with then suddenly it's no longer "God's guidance" but a taint and blaspheme of the devil. I think if there is a Jesus, he will be too busy arguing with biggest part of his "followers" on why they won't join him during the 1,000 year reign to spend any time with his real followers.
You handled it well Myojine. Unfortunately such people do not like having their own words thrown in their face, and you can't change them.

Relevant to the topic is the image i use as a signature on gaia
http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b176/chobitsfan05/shelffish-1.jpg



lets gather atll the christians we can find and lets go pickette the sinners at redlobster and AppleBee's

I thought a few people might get a laugh outta this.

[Schatten Lupus]

Relevant to the topic is the image i use as a signature on gaia
The shrimp thing is probably one of the other biggest ones. I know not all do, but most seem to only pick and choose, and Jesus' greatest commandments that were laid out to get into Heaven, of which includes loving everyone as yourself, is largely ignored. Well, unless I guess that is they are actually miserable and hate themselves.

[Aprilrain]

What do you expect she's a freaking Mormon!

[TxKimberly]

Well that was very cheerful and uplifting - NOT.
If kristi is an adult and still wants to communicate with you, then I would politely tell step-mommy to blow it out her ass end . . .

[Gaby2]

Hi Myojine! Pretty heavy stuff for you to take there.
I also admire your reactions.
I'll just throw in my best wishes for you too.
:hugs:Gaby

[Myojine]

Her last comment to me.


Beth Coleman Mayfield



first of all, how dare you preach to me. I was never your mother, just someone who got stuck raising you and then I finally learned it was time to get rid of you. No I am not a psychologist and never claimed to be, but I do know the difference between a healthy mind and one like yours. You need help and better get it before you screw yourself up even more. You can answer this message but I am putting a block on you and won't receive it. Kristi may be "blood" of yours but she IS NOT your sister. All you ever did when you were living with my family was create problems and nobody wanted you there, and that's why you were kicked out. I don't feel sorry for you, just sorry for the lives you are now invovled in. If you attempt to contact me through facebook again, with this name or another and I find out about it, I will report you and have you banned from facebook.
And yes, I do regret you ever being in my life but I have moved on and have a great life now, especially where it doesn't involve you.
..




.

[Pythos]

two words.....efff her.

[Schatten Lupus]

Sounds like Miss Mayfield is the one of an unhealthy mind and needs therapy.

[JulieK1980]

I recently had a Mormon tell me about how loving everyone in their church was. I wonder if this is representative of their "love"?

I'm sorry that you had to endure that much hatred, and I do hope you can let the past be, and move forward to a more positive future.

[Diane Elizabeth]

Well it sounds like she is the one with a problem. But if Kristi is old enough to make her own decisions then it should be up to her to say yea or nay to staying in contact with you.

[Melody Moore]

What do you expect she's a freaking Mormon!
There are some very ignorant & stupid groups of people in this world & a Mormon would have to
top that list with the Muslims, Westboro Baptist, 7th day Adventist & some Pentecostal religions.

I was watching a show on TV the other night and the statement was made that more people die
because of religion than because of drugs - I have to agree with that because of the amount of
wars that are fought over opposing religious views or ideologies.

My own parents are not religious bigots but the have beliefs based on tradition that was born from
religious ideologies. I knew that my family would never accept me & the reaction I got when I did
come out to them was to be expected and I knew it would be pointless trying to convince them to
accept me. So when I came out, I told them & then left it at that because I would be flogging the
proverbial 'dead horse' if I tried. Sometimes people like this do come around in their own time & I
have see that with the person I least expected that would come start to come around - my father!

Myojine, now get this I was born intersex, both my parents KNOW that I was both male & female
at birth, but still they had their own ideas & my mother being a nurse who also put a lot of faith
in doctors who surgically reassigned my genitalia as an infant. My parents have never talked to
me about any of it and it was hushed up & kept a secret until I found everything out last year.
My both adamantly parents believed that 'nurture over nature' would make me a 'normal male'!

But still my parents refuse to talk about it. Recently when I asked about my father why my parents
went to Brisbane when I was born I got told the biggest lie packed with so much hypocrisy it blew
my mind that someone would so blatantly lie like that. My Dad was still covering up the fact I was
born in another hospital, in Toowoomba & then referred to a specialist children's hospital in Brisbane!

But I do believe that my Dad is fully aware that he is now standing on some shaky ground after I did
come out & when he told me this other lie to cover up again. Because the last time we spoke he was
asking me questions about how I was going to afford my surgery & much to my amazement he knew
exactly how much money it would cost. Now this is a man who beat me up & bullied me all my life
until I finally rebelled and smashed his head in at 16 years old. So for my Dad to start asking questions
just blows my mind because it does show that he is now starting to take a lot more interest. I asked
him how he knew about the cost of SRS and he told me that he was reading about it in a magazine.

Usually a negative reaction can mean denial and my parents were in denial about me & still are to some
extent despite the fact I have found everything out. But some people do change in time, obviously my
father is taking a lot more interest in the 'intersex/transsexual' topic again after it all obviously came back
to haunt him. My mother on the other had is feeling so guilty & ashamed now about her decision that she
doesn't want to even deal with it - she has threatened to call police if I try to contact her again, that is
how bad she is affected my this. It is a shame really because there are so many things I understand now
& would like to say to her about her as a mother & the decision that she had to make regarding my mixed
gender/sex, but right now she doesn't want to listen to anything I have to say. So for now I have to leave
it be. I am giving her some time to settle down and maybe learn a little bit more through other sources like
my father has. Both my parents are divorced by the way & live over 1700 miles apart from each other.

What I am planning on doing is sending my mother a letter I have written to help her overcome her own guilt
& shame then a few days after I send it to her I plan on going to visit her with another elderly lady, (my best
friends mother) who also fully supports me so if there is any nonsense like calling the police or anything then
I have someone else there to back me up that my intentions & my visit to my mother is purely honourable. I
am also thinking about going to go to local police beforehand to brief them on the situation with my mother.

In my experience in life a lot of the time when people are confronted by something or someone like us & they
react in a very negative way it usually means denial or rejection and in this their own guilt is often exposed.
I have found this in all the homophobes, transphobes I have met & a guy who exposed himself as a wife beater.
But to my shock & amazement, nothing has ever been as bad & as revealing as the way that my own parents
have reacted. This is a big issue to them that must be very hard to deal with & come to terms with and only
they can deal with it in their own way & in their own time. If I try to do anything too soon here, then I am only
confronting them again and the normal reaction for most people is to become defensive. And when those walls
come up, you would do better to smash your head into a brick wall.

So the bottom line is walk away and let them deal with it in their own time, but I have to agree with Kimberly about Kristi...


If kristi is an adult and still wants to communicate with you, then I would politely tell step-mommy to blow it out her ass end . . .
I said exactly same thing to a girlfriend who's son would come & visit me all the time because she had some issue with it. ;)

[Sharon]

There's a lot of generalizing about religious organizations being posted here and I would like it to stop. Not all followers of a faith adhere to the same beliefs as more outspoken followers or even the appointed or self-appointed leaders of a group do. So, in respect of those forum members who may belong to the aforementioned or other religious affiliations, please resist the urge to trash them with such a wide swipe.

[Tara D. Rose]

Upon reading the messages back and forth betwwent the two of you, I would just say F.U. then let the Bit** block you according to her promise to do so. What have you lost?

[Ashley Allison]

Myojine, your response to her was well written and IMHO more than she deserved. I personally would not have responded to her ever again.

[Momarie]

Sharon, thank you for what you wrote.

I can only imagine the pain of the members here who are Mormon, LDS etc. when they happen upon this thread and read such hurtful, unkind words.

I want them to know how sorry I am they had to read such bigotry and offer them a warm heartfelt hug.

[Chickhe]

For someone who made a choice to be a part of your family, I would say she is totally out of line. I don't know your history, but I know she had some involvement in how things worked out between you two... so nothing she says is your fault. Besides, as a kid you were learning, as an adult she was supposed to be more understanding and should have provided guidance. I would avoid contacting her, not because she asked, but because she is a really is a bad person to have in your life. If you have a good relationship with your sister, I would keep it up, at least let your sister know you love her. The good news, at least you know where you stand with her and its an easy decision to make.

[nuwanda]

What a BEE EYE TEA SEA AECH!

[Avana]

I feel like there is much more to this whole story and response than the OP is presenting here.

Either way, you should have just done as she suggested and not contact her again.

[TxKimberly]

There are some very ignorant & stupid groups of people in this world & a Mormon would have to
top that list . . .

Ouch! I'm not big into religion, ANY religion, but I'd still have to kind of argue with you on that one. I have met quite a few Mormons and quite frankly most have impressed the hell out of me. I dont believe what they believe, but I admire most of them that I have met none the less. Taking care of their family and their children is a major priority for them and all of them that I have met practice what they preach with little or no hypocrisy.

[donnatracey]

I have to agree with you, Kimberly. Once again Miss Melody has put her foot in her mouth...ouch! I have known many Mormons and they are some of the nicest, most caring people in the world. If all families structures were as solid as a Mormon's family, this world would be in a lot better shape. Perhaps we should all heed Sharon's earlier words and NOT judge a religion based on 1 person....geez....

[Melody Moore]

I have to agree with you, Kimberly. Once again Miss Melody has put her foot in her mouth...ouch! I have known many Mormons and they are some of the nicest, most caring people in the world. If all families structures were as solid as a Mormon's family, this world would be in a lot better shape. Perhaps we should all heed Sharon's earlier words and NOT judge a religion based on 1 person....geez....

Sorry girls if you don't agree with my point of view, but it is my personal opinion, agree with it or not, but one thing is
obvious here, those with the biggest struggles I have seen in the transgender community have come from those that
have families & friends with strong religious ties. I have no respect at all for an ancient doctrine written by a man who
claimed to be a prophet & thought that shellfish was an abomination of God simply because he didn't the taste of it.

See: Leviticus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Book_of_Leviticus)

[Myojine]

Sorry girls if you don't agree with my point of view, but it is my personal opinion, agree with it or not, but one thing is
obvious here, those with the biggest struggles I have seen in the transgender community have come from those that
have families & friends with strong religious ties. I have no respect at all for an ancient doctrine written by a man who
claimed to be a prophet & thought that shellfish was an abomination of God simply because he didn't the taste of it.

See: Leviticus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Book_of_Leviticus)

Some how I dont want to talk about everyones superman imaginary friend in the sky, kay?

[Sharon]

Any further posts denigrating a religion will be removed. Take it to the Religion section or, better yet, to a website where this sort of thing is more customary.

[TerryTerri]

Myojine,
I am sorry that your Step-mother was so unaccepting and condeming of you. It is sad. But, it is what it is. I'd encourage you to accept that, unless unforeseen events happen, she will never accept you and that she wishes no contact from you. That's the reality you have to deal with. Try to deal with it and move on. Too much good out there to loose focus because of a little yuck!
Best of Luck to you as you trudge your own unique path to a happy destiny!!!

[Andrea85]

That's just life. It isn't always a perfect fantasy land. I lost my fiance of over 5 years over who I am, and I was over it in a day. Nothing is gained by dwelling on the past, other than letting them win.

[Nicole Erin]

Sharon, thank you for what you wrote.
I can only imagine the pain of the members here who are Mormon, LDS etc. when they happen upon this thread and read such hurtful, unkind words.
I want them to know how sorry I am they had to read such bigotry and offer them a warm heartfelt hug.

You forgot to mention that we are all a bunch of bitter men.

NOW onto the original OP.
Two words define everything - Step Mother.
Yes that is right, step family is about as relevant as in-law family, as in, meaningless.
I have step-family and quite honestly, I just don;t care about them.

There is a reason people hate their step-parents. There is a reason behind the phrase, "I am going to beat you like a red headed step-child". there is a reason that Cinderella's step-mother was an evil bitch.

See the pattern?
Do not contact her on FB of course. If so, tell her to go piss up a rope.

[Rianna Humble]

You forgot to mention that we are all a bunch of bitter men.

You seem to be quite hung up lately on being a man, but your comment did not add one iota to the matter under discussion.

Myojine, I don't believe that it is her religion that makes your step-mother react to you in this way, so it is useless to appeal to her with reason taken from one of her religion's handbooks. IMNSHO, your step mother shows what a mean-spirited person she has always been when she refers to how she drove you out of the house when she was supposed to be caring for you.

You have every right to feel hurt by her attitude, but you shouldn't let her mean-spiritidness stop you from staying in contact with your sister. As for her threats with respect to facebook, she has more chance of being thrown off herself for incitement to hatred.

[suzy1]

There's a lot of generalizing about religious organizations being posted here and I would like it to stop. Not all followers of a faith adhere to the same beliefs as more outspoken followers or even the appointed or self-appointed leaders of a group do. So, in respect of those forum members who may belong to the aforementioned or other religious affiliations, please resist the urge to trash them with such a wide swipe.

I am an atheist but I agree with Sharon. I know some lovely people that have a strong religious faith.
I used to work with a Mormon and he was a nice man.

But this step mother is a fine example of how stupid a person can be.


SUZY

[donnalee]

What a lovely woman. "You betta awf!" - Lenny Bruce

[Loni]

sounds ;like it is time to just move on as she has a closed and locked mind.
if your sister is 21 she can talk and be with whom she chooses. if she is under 18 then mommy dearest can drop the foot.

new day. new life.

[diannecourtney]

Myojine, this woman wouldn't qualify for Cinderella's step mother. If she hasn't infected Kristi. please continue the relationship it is so necessary. Do insist that she does not relate the contact to the wicked witch of the west who has a vacancy in the upstairs!!!

We are with you, Dianne

[kimdl93]

I would encourage you ignore this woman and live your life as you deem appropriate. You don't need a wicked old stepmother in your life!

[Randilegs]

Let's see if I can type a full reply to this without getting mad... Let's ALL please stop bashing the LDS Church. I am a Mormon, active within the Church and I carry my recommend in my purse when I am en femme. (For those who don't get the last reference, suffice to say it is a often considered a high social mark within the Church, even though it shouldn't even matter.) Just as Westboro does not represent all Baptists, this women is a poor example of the teachings of the Church. There are p-lenty of folks out there who go to church, but either don't understand the teachings or are incapable of living them daily. Myojine, if you would like to hit her with from the Church angle, I suggest that you recommend "The Miracle of Forgiveness" by President (of the Church) Spencer W. Kimball. The reference may make her mad. But if so, she isn't living the gospel as taught by the Church. It could also make her stop and think. If you would like some additional guidance on gospel approaches, specific to the the LDS Church, please send me a private note. I would be more than happy to help.

On the whole it sounds like this woman is simply a shallow person who lets fear and ignorance drive her life and her interactions with you. This is a shame... for her. For yourself, go on with your life, with your head held high. Each of us here loves and respects for you who you are. This is our strength. Her vindictiveness is her weakness and is only deserving of your pity. Or your sympathy, only if she makes an effort to overcome it.

Randi

[Jessinthesprings]

wow. preaching to the choir, but if she is really a christian she needs to go back and read the bible because where is the love for neighbor? Where is the forgivemess? She is entitled to another opinion. The bible never says you have to like the sinner but why worry abou the spec in your neighbors eye with the plank in your own. Also there is only one verse that I can find that even remotly pertains to transgenderism is:

Deut 22:5 The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God. (KJV)

Oddly enough after some quick google search mentioned that the orginal hebrew text for "garment" is kel-ee'. In other instances it is used in reference to a weapon,implement, utensil, vessel.

An Army Chaplin explained that he felt that this was in reference to women in battle. In short women should not go to war and men should not desiguse themselves as women to get away from or bring war to the home.

Odddly the rest of Deut. lists several infractions such as railings around our roofs, and tassles at the corners of our clothes.... Since it's the Old Testiment and the Jesus and the New Testiment became a rule changer I think we are in the clear in wearing women's clothes.

As for your step-mom... I cannot even fathom the words that she has said. I think she has really shown who she is. She is not even worth the time of day. Forgive her and then move on with your life. As for your sister if she wants to talk to you let her. It is a free country. I would let your step-B|%#$ take it to facebook... and if you get banned there are worse things.