In a Dilemma

[thechic]

In a Dilemma

I Have a Dilemma not certain what to do.

Took my 16 year old to the moves she met up with friend and we all sat together and had a great time no problems.

Often Drop my 16 year old off to school my work truck, I often talk to the teachers and students.

Dropped of my Girl to a ball,then picked her up and a chat her and her mates.

Had an insident happend with my daughter and an offender,I dropped tools from work,was still in overalls rushed to the police station to comfort her was there for about half a day with her at the police interview,so my daughter could describe everything that happend.

Go shopping with the kids and out on a regular basis and meany more activities.

And the list goes on

Ive Just lernt from my 16 daughter and my 6 year old my wife and a good friend,everybody even the police have presumed im there mother,But ive never said i was there mother not once no ones even asked for my name,apparintly this happens often,if i was asked i would of said i was there father,so now my 16 year old is to embarrassed to go out with me.

What should I do? apart from reverting to a man look.

[CatAttack]

I mean this sounds like a great thing, other than that your 16 year old is embarrassed to go out with you. Is she embarrassed because people assume you're her mother or that you would tell people that you're her father?

If the latter, then just come up with something better than father, like mompa or something I don't know lol just off the top of my head, but you get the point. Like, something that is like mother, but different so that it is still distinguishable. If the reason is the former then I guess you could just tell people that you're her father whenever it is brought up.

[Aprilrain]

Hhhmmmmmmm? a 16 year old who is embarrassed by her parent, I've never heard of that one before! : P

i LOVE when people just assume I'm mom, what's wrong with having two moms? there are weirder things in the world now than lesbians like those freaky transgendered people!

[Kaitlyn Michele]

My own situation is similar ..my daughters are 17 and 14....i started living 3 years ago... i've said before, i am their dad...that's just the way it is..i'm their dad AND i'm a woman..

privately its no issue...publicly, my 14 yr old really doesn't want to go out with me, she is embarrassed, but has slowly learned that it's ok, and it gets better..my oldest is fine with it..

however, both of them protest loudly if people assume I'm mom...their basis is only partially the awkwardness of it, its about their actual Mom..YOU ARE NOT MOM...TELL THEM!!! was hissed at me once....
i asked my daughter what should i say, and she just sat quietly and stewed... basically now its dont ask, dont tell...and if i am asked, i say parent... at one doctor, she saw my exwife's name and looked at me and just smiled...who knows what she thought...
they call me kaitlyn in public, which takes getting used to even for me!

i think geneva this is one of those darned if you do or don't things, where its just gonna be part of life and that as long as the overall level of support is there, it will work out..

[Chickhe]

It is simple, you are different than her other friends parents and she doesn't want to have to explain to anyone. I think I would tend to kid her about it a little, just to show that you can deal with it and yet at the same time, you should talk to her about it. If I was in that situation, I would work out some sort of plan with her, either to continue the abiguity or tell her you don't care if she describes you as being transgender. I would think at her age, most kids would understand, but at the same time she is probably trying to fit in to some social group and not sure how to handle complications. ...I read somewhere about a teen who was embarrased by their father, the father decided to show up in costume everytime and made it a point to should out who his son was.... maybe suggesting that you might try that to your daughter would enlighten her some..

[arbon]

What can you do? Not much really. People are going to make assumptions and your daughter is going to react to the whole situation however she will. It is something she has to work through herself. Be a loving parent, be open to talking about it when she feels she needs to talk, don't try to force her to see it your way.

It is difficult, I know. I go through awkward situations with my daughter more and more often. She is only 11. She hates it to when people think I am her mom. It happened last night while we were at a restaurant and another couple that knows my wife and I were there with their kids. We wanted to go say hi to them and introduce out daughter because they had never met her - my daughter says "they are going to think I have 2 moms!" and she did not want to go with us to say hi.

Sometimes she is very embarrassed about me. She has even refused to go out in public with me at times.

She is going through a lot of changes in her own life as she grows, having her dad going through such huge changes at the same time makes it harder.

Be patient and loving and be the best parent you can be.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

She is going through a lot of changes in her own life as she grows, having her dad going through such huge changes at the same time makes it harder.

Be patient and loving and be the best parent you can be.

it all boils down this ...

[Allsteamedup]

Dear Geneva,
I have 'spoken' to you before.
It would be easier in social situations if your daughter introduced you. That then leaves the onus with her to say 'This is my dad, Geneva'.
You do not seem to have any understanding why offence would be caused that an assumption has been made that you are their mother. Children have ONE mother but you will always be a parent. When you give a signature for them do you sign against 'parent of' or 'mother of'?
It won't take much to remedy, but this is a consequence of being a TS parent. You can be thankful that your children have been so glad to have you in so many social situations.

[Myojine]

In a Dilemma

I Have a Dilemma not certain what to do.

Took my 16 year old to the moves she met up with friend and we all sat together and had a great time no problems.

Often Drop my 16 year old off to school my work truck, I often talk to the teachers and students.

Dropped of my Girl to a ball,then picked her up and a chat her and her mates.

Had an insident happend with my daughter and an offender,I dropped tools from work,was still in overalls rushed to the police station to comfort her was there for about half a day with her at the police interview,so my daughter could describe everything that happend.

Go shopping with the kids and out on a regular basis and meany more activities.

And the list goes on

Ive Just lernt from my 16 daughter and my 6 year old my wife and a good friend,everybody even the police have presumed im there mother,But ive never said i was there mother not once no ones even asked for my name,apparintly this happens often,if i was asked i would of said i was there father,so now my 16 year old is to embarrassed to go out with me.

What should I do? apart from reverting to a man look.

I have No idea if this is my dyslexia or If I just cant read this..
This isnt ment to be rude, but I cant read this O.o

[thechic]

Thanks for all your replys.my 16 year old gets embarristed to be with me because shes affraid that i will tell people that im her father and i will if asked,she wants me to say im her aunt.This is a bit hard because i can see this causing more issues,as im still married to her mother and female 24/7,my six year old dosent care she often says "No shes my father".