GG's dating CDs. Is CD a positive or negative factor in new relationships?

[Jamsey]

As my present relationship is finally ending, and I will have new life soon, with cross dressing a major part of it, I made a vow to myself, and the few people that know I CD, that my next relationship with a woman will be with full knowledge of my crossdressing before we start.

So, that said, how much of a turn-off or a problem will it be with the women I choose to date, once it becomes knowledge that I am a cross dresser?

Now I know on this site there are a lot of supporting wives/girl friends, but are they the exception rather than the rule?

How difficult do you think it will be for me, I haven't been on the dating scene in probably over 18 years, to find a woman who is accepting of crossdressing?

I am not talking about casual dating, but once it gets beyond that point, where there is interest by both parties in having more than a casaul relationship.

I am confused by some of the other sites I visited when that question is asked of a GG.

Any comments will be greatly appreciated.

Jamsey

[AmandaM]

I've had something like 25 girlfriends. I told 3. One didn't like it, 2 were okay with it. There is hope. Tell them after a few dates or a month, don't let it linger.

[misskristykitty]

I am a GG and I have been with my CD for almost a year now. He told me 1 month before we was official and it did not bother me.Actually I embraced it and felt like I do now which is I have a shopping buddy.We have a great relationship we tell each other everything and he always gets me to help him with his clothes and make up. There is nothing about our relationship I would change. I love my CD to pieces I truly am 1 lucky girl to have him/her in my life.

[Jamsey]

Misskristykitty,
Wow, I am completely blown away by your post, and totally envious. It gives my hope, a bit of optimism. Thank you very much.
Jamsey.

[Lucy_Bella]

I was very lucky to have found my girl .. She was the only one I told out of the 5 I have dating since I first became single, after 24 years of marriage. I was the same as you are now ,it is very scarey exposing your deepist secret to another but when the time comes you will know just who to tell and who not..
I gave off hints to see reactions of how my potentual GF would react to a Cder ..Any signs of negetivity towards it , I slowly ended the relationship..

[Jamsey]

Thanks Lucy, I do have a very good girl friend, who I have liked for years. In conversation with her, we share alot, I brought up that I was having an identity crisis, and that my supressed feminine side was coming out after all these years. I didn't mention CD, but she caught on, and stated, 'you aren't one of those are you?' That caught me totally off guard. I didn't answer but directed the conversation to another subject. I would be very interested and have thought about having a relationship with my friend after I divorce, but now have 2nd thoughts. I haven't called her as much as I used too, she lives in a different city.
Now, as I type this, and I'm fully dressed, I wonder, if I do pursue a relationship, what will be her reaction. Interesting. Can I give up crossdressing again? hmmmm

[AllieSF]

I am looking too. The sad fact is that who really wants to tackle this kind of baggage? Not many. I know that I would be dubious about taking on someone else's issues when I can easily avoid them all together. Yes, there are many who have no problem with it as long as it is not in their own relationship. I had my first date in guy mode Friday night with a GG who met me the first time as Allie 3 weeks ago. This one may or may not progress very far. I think it needs to be looked at as a numbers game with the idea to meet as many as possible so that the odds finally may turn in our favor. I prefer to meet them as Allie first, then there is no anxiety about any future revealing of who I am, just clarifying details.

[ReineD]

You ask what is the likelihood a GG will accept the CDing. I have several thoughts.

First, I think your best chance for acceptance is to do as you say, tell her as soon as the relationship reaches that next level. In my oppinion, a GG who is falling in love will be more open-minded than someone who is told many years into the relationship. Generally.

But the rest has really more to do with you, the level or the intensity of the CDing, and how far you plan to go with it. I think it's pretty safe to say the more you wish to be femme such as eventually living full or near full time or possibly wanting breasts or thinking about transition, the fewer hetero GGs will be OK with this, although this might well change a generation or more from now.

Do you dress occasionally and are you also happy being in guy mode? Do you have other interests than the CDing? I guess I'm asking if there is a balance in your life, not only with the actual CDing, but also with related activities such as shopping and time spent online. Again in my opinion, the greater the balance, the greater the likelihood a GG who is told at the beginning will be OK with this. Another important consideration is how "out" would you like to be? If a new girlfriend has a large family, many friends and a work environment that are on the conservative side, she may feel awkward if you enjoy being out in your home town a lot.

Last, just briefly about my SO and I: I embrace her fully and we go out frequently dressed, but not in our home town. My SO does not wish work associates, friends, and family members to know, and I have children from a previous marriage and also some friends that I do not wish to tell. We are not ashamed of the CDing but at the same time we realize it is more difficult for many people to embrace this when it it close to home for them. It is much easier for strangers in different towns to accept us, or at least be polite about it. :)

[Jamsey]

Thank you ReineD for your thoughts. They are all good observations.
I have a large family, but none where I live. Most don't know though some may suspect.
At work, one female friend knows, no one else does, though a few may suspect.
I am firmly male, have no desire to go through the transistion. I like myself, except for certain situations. I love to crossdress and now have a very large wardrobe. I love the feel of forms, but I don't feel the need to augment my natural breasts. I like what I have.
How out would I be? Good question, bucket list things, I'm old enough for a list, is the Chicago BeAll and Vegas Divas convention. I have started to attend some local LGBT events dressed. If exposed, I will not hide, but plan on embracing it.
I like being in a relationship, but this time I will be much more careful. I think, with the right person, we could have a very satisfying and rewarding relationship. Aye, there's the rub.
Sorry all, I didn't know this thread would turn into a therapy sessions. lol.

[Babeba]

I found out about my boyfriend's female side as soon as he felt like we could be a serious sort of couple someday - so about a week into our relationship. For us, it was very positive because it really helped establish good lines of communication - we agreed that we can ask each other anything, and I really respected the amount of trust he had in me to share something that made him feel so vulnerable.

Something I would say to keep in mind is, the majority of GGs have no real, personal knowledge of crossdressers, transvestitism, transsexuality, transgendered people or even drag queen acts. They will either have some stereotypes or vague ideas most of the time - but nothing really concrete.

On the other hand, if you wait until well into a relationship to talk about it - there is a very real possibility that her emotions about CDing will be all tangled in to feelings of confusion (I thought I knew this man?) betrayal (why didn't he tell me? I deserved to know) and resentment (he's not the man I thought he was).

There are real flip sides to when to tell, but from my perspective when it gets serious is better.

[Miss Maxine]

My girlfriend (Missa, on this forum) was actually the person who encouraged me to embrace Maxine and let her out into the world. I would not have had the courage to dress, without her. I'd still be unhappy and Maxine would still be a prisoner in my mind. A man in a dress has always been a huge turn-on, for her.

So, yes, it can be a positive thing. I have received so many compliments from women, regarding my appearance, in any combination (full enfemme or partial). There are plenty of women out there who really like cross dressing. When it comes to relationships, my best piece of advice is simply this: honesty. If someone can't love you for who you are and not who they want you to be, then that's not the right person for you. Don't settle for anything less than someone you can be 100% honest with and who can love you for EVERYTHING that you are.

[Jessica Ames]

I feel like the only time to tell someone that you are dating about dressing is as soon as you know you want to get serious. I FEEL like this should be treated like anything else that the person needs to know about your personality to know you better. I'm not saying it will be the same, easy convo as anything else, but you have to be honest about who you are. Then, you will know that the person loves you and not the version that you are comfortable talking about.

I hope this made sense. It makes sense in my head. Haha!

[Babeba]

Jessica,

It does! In fact, it makes sense because your prospective partner will always know the true you. Not only will you trust HER love, but she'll trust YOU*. Warts and all.




*so long as there's not something else that you're hiding from her, like secret love children or that you're addicted to Montel, or something.

[ReineD]

Sorry all, I didn't know this thread would turn into a therapy sessions. lol.

That's OK. Most of the threads here turn into therapy sessions. That happens a lot in support forums. :)

[Sara Jessica]

Let's be realistic, look at what women might typically strive for when considering a man to date and possibly have a relationship with:


a great personality
intelligent
witty
handsome
ability to be a good provider (as in contribute something to the table)
values


It's really simple. Women want men. A vast majority of men are all good with being MEN.

What is conspicuously absent from the above list?


another girlfriend
pretty
wears a dress
someone to share clothes with
spends more time getting ready than I do


Face it, the odds are stacked against you. I'm not saying it's impossible but going back to the title of your thread, on average there is not a lot of POSITIVE from most women's POV when it comes to bringing CD/TG into a relationship.

Many women think it's kind of cool, as long as it's not in their own backyard.

[TGMarla]

Sara's right, you know. I'm not trying to throw cold water on this conversation, because it's obviously true that there are women out there who are okay with a crossdressing man in their lives. But many women who are actually looking to get into relationships have already been in failed relationships, and they are on the lookout for whatever baggage the person they are dating might be toting around. Does he drink too much? Does he smoke? How is he with women in general? Why did his last relationship(s) fail? Will he change once we get serious? How is he with kids? And so on....

Telling her you like to crossdress, get all dolled up like a woman and even go places in public like that, wear pantyhose and dresses and high heels.....it's like dropping a grenade into your cozy little foxhole. There are plenty of other fish in the sea, and odds are, a crossdressing man isn't quite what she's looking for in a long-term relationship.

If you look hard and long enough, you'll find who and what you're looking for. It might even happen quickly, but it's not a likely chance. There are women out there who will accept this in you. But I think you'll find that this disclosure might scare more away than will actually embrace it and be fine with it.

[Jamsey]

Sara, TGMarla and the others that responded, thank you.
That is what I have been reading in various sites, that crossdressing men are not high on their perspective partners list.
But hiding my crossdressing from a possible girlfriend is no longer an option for me.
1, because of my wardrobe. When I get an apartment I think it will have to be a two bedroom one. One bedroom will only be for me, Jamsey, and my clothes, shoes, jewelry, etc. I hope one bedroom will be enough. lol. Over the last 2 years I have gone way overboard. But what great sales and prices the stores have been having. There is no way I could hide that, and purging is NOT an option.

2. I'm also 63, I'm not looking for someone who will call be daddy, pops, or Granddad. I will be looking for someone in my age bracket. That may or may not be good, depending on how you look at it. But, for me, having someone I can relate too in many ways and life experiences is a high priority.

It will be an interesting experience to say the least.

[Deana ♥ Danni]

I hope you find someone that you can be yourself with, with openness and complete honesty :)

From a GG's point of view, to me I really like being with a CDer because they understand how long it takes to get ready (putting on makeup, picking out the outfit, shaving, etc...) They like to shop and look at jewelry and clothing :)

Hugs,
Deana

[Lucy_Bella]

Jamsey,
I was in the same boat not very long ago..I too thought I would never find an accepting GG.. Now looking back I seen how wrong I was, if people find an attraction with one another , its my belief that it should go more than skin deep..Appearance, whats inside , and a big heart is the qualities one should look for,anything other than that would be a very shallow person and your better off walking away..

[DonniDarkness]

I think the acceptance between GG's and Cd's in a relationship all boils down to chemistry and communication.

A GG would have more understanding if they "Click" with you. Like in the sense that they are intrigued by you as a person and it compels them to learn more about you. I think this chemistry would would outweigh the "baggage" of being a CD.

I also think that GG's who are accepting of their CDer have a heightened sense to try to understand their SO. They realize that this is an important part of you and embrace it because they know it makes you happy. Those that are in love with one another will do as much as they can to bring happiness into each others lives.

I also think that when they know you well enough they can see both sides of you no matter how you are presenting, maybe thats the part that makes it easier for them to accept?... once they "know about you" and try to work thru understanding it maybe it gives them insight to the full you by recognizing that both sides of your personality kind of spill over onto each other

Dunno just some thoughts...

-Donni-

[k lynn]

I tell the women I date after the third date most dont accept it and thats that Most of them cant belive it that a man likes to wear panties and a bra but I do my last relationship lasted 8 months she was won back over by her ex husbund I wished her good luck.

[ReineD]

That is what I have been reading in various sites, that crossdressing men are not high on their perspective partners list.
But hiding my crossdressing from a possible girlfriend is no longer an option for me.

That's why you wait until there is chemistry between you, when the relationship reaches that next level. You don't tell on the first few dates, since you don't know if there is any future there.


He feels attracted to her, they talk and laugh with complete ease, and he feels wonderful just being there with her. They have chemistry. All of a sudden, that feeling becomes everything...he misses it when she is away, and gets lost in it when she is near. They are perfect together, even though she will never measure up to the list of things he thought he wanted. He got something far better, his heart knew better than his brain what he needed.

Precisely! :)

Also, Jamsey, judging by what you've told us here ... you are recently divorced, and in the last few years you say you've "gone way overboard" with the CDing, this may well be why it didn't work out with your wife? Not the dressing so much as having gone overboard? It's easy for a GG to feel as if she comes second when a CD is in a pink fog. Just saying that if you are still in a pink fog, no matter how accepting of the CDing a potential girlfriend might be, she may feel as if she falls second place too and this is likely the reason she may wish to move on. This is what I meant earlier when I asked if you've achieved a balance in your life with the CDing.

[misskristykitty]

Misskristykitty,
Wow, I am completely blown away by your post, and totally envious. It gives my hope, a bit of optimism. Thank you very much.
Jamsey.


I get told that a lot,but there are GG's out there just like me.

[Annaliese2010]

My 'feeling' is, based on my limited experience wrt this issue, that Most GG's oppose an M2F transgendered mate BUT that there are significant numbers who would be not only accepting but truly embracing IF youre lucky enough to come across them.

[Rachel Morley]

I can't really say what I think most women might think about dating a CDer but I can tell you what my wife thinks about it for herself. She likes guys that have a softer, more feminine side to them. She tells me that she thinks my crossdressing and going out in public presenting as female gives me precious insights that go well beyond what a "regular" non-trans male is aware of, and that she would be the first to sing the praises of crossdressing husbands who do really "get" many things about women that other guys can't. For example, she loves it that I understand why it can take so long for her to get ready for an evening out; why she just doesn't feel pretty some days despite looking more or less the same as always; why a woman might feel vulnerable when walking to the car late at night. etc etc. All of these things (and more) can make me and other crossdressers who educate themselves much more sensitive to women's feelings, and much more in tune with women's lives than most guys typically are which can only help a relationship in the long run. My bi-gendered life does give me valuable insights into what it "might" be like to be female, but obviously it stops well short of what it's actually like to be a real woman.

[Jamsey]

Wow, again. OMG, thanks for all the posts. That is why I love this site, I can't seem to get away from it. It is addicting in itself. Thank you all again for you insights and opinions. I am truly a total psychological mess right now and I'm having trouble finding stable ground. Yes, I'm in counseling. But what I read here is far more helpful and insightful. I know there are GGs out there that will be accepting, and I may actually know some. I'm not completely divorced yet, as someone said here in one of the posts, my spouse and I are 'technically and legally married', but that is all. The divorce, I'm hoping, will be finalized soon. I'm somewhat apprehensive about the next steps after that, wel, probably more than somewhat, and that is driving my present confusion

[Badtranny]

Jamsey,

Congratulations for keeping your head up and charging forward. I'm 20 years younger than you and not looking for a woman (they have cooties you know) but my friends AllieSF and Rachel Morley inspired me to chime in here.

Allie is single and looking, and Rachel is married (to a beeeeuuutiful woman) but they have at least one thing in common; They are both very comfortable with who they are. I am shocked to hear that Allie has trouble meeting women because I've been out with her a couple of times and she didn't appear to have trouble meeting anyone at all, and that was two years ago! It might be a generational thing, but my experience since I grew a pair and came out (I love that) is that women are remarkably accepting. I realize that I'm not a CD, BUT I look like one if I have a dress on, and something in between in my cute little jeans. (write that down) You can't tell by looking at me which way I swing, okay you can assume, but my point is I get more attention from women now then I ever did as a "man". Their IS one key difference now, I'm a lot more friendly and open. I tend to be rather chatty (not like Allie though) and women are naturally drawn to fun animated conversations. They want to know more, they ask me questions, they are interested. When we go out dancing, guess who I end up dancing with? Yep the girls. Guys are morons. They sit at the bar giving the perv eye and talk to each other about why the girls always hang out with the queers. Hello! We're fun!

Be yourself girl. Embrace who you are and be proud. Some women and all of the men will think you're gay, but so what. I guarantee that you will meet many women who will be delighted to find out that you're straight.

[Jessica Ames]

I hear a lot of "realistic" comments that maybe aren't the easiest to hear. I can understand that POV, but I think that the personal experience is everything. If you are involved in this "alternative lifestyle", your best bet is to get to know crowds and communities that are closer to said "alternative lifestyles" and more accepting to everyone. If you find woman in more traditional ways like basic bars/clubs in very masculine environments, my guess is that those woman ARE looking for macho men.

Finding more alternative, maybe LGBT friendly areas to hang out in, you would find more woman that aren't looking for the basic, traditional, macho men.

[Jamsey]

Thanks again for the interesting comments.
Jessica, you can't get more of a "Alternative Lifestyle" in the Midwest than Madison WI. The 25 square miles of fantasy surrounded by reality, something like that, is an apt discription. The LGBT, wish there was a better term, are accepted pratically everywhere in the city. Much like the Chelsea district in NYC, where I love to go to when I visit NYC.
It is still vibrant, even with our present Republican Tea Party Governor and legislators, who are all mad, and are saying some really scary and frightening things about the LGBT communities in Wisconsin. But that is happening in a lot of states. That fight goes on here every day. A.L.E.C has LGBT in their crosshairs.
I should stay away from politics here. Lost what I was trying to say.
I did go out as Jamsey recently, to a club, dressed, and had a very good time. Acted silly at times, felt almost totally relaxed and secure in who I was, I also getting much more comforatable shoppping for fem clothes and beginning to like the way I looked dressed. Wish I could do make-up though. What I'm doing is what I believe Badtranny and others are trying to communicate to me, 'being comfortable with you are'.
I don't do bars, except for maybe watching the PACKERS. I gave up TV for lent, yes I know it was over quite some time ago but I don't miss TV, especially all the rotten political commercials.
If I can find an accepting GG, which I do believe is possible, Madison, where I want to stay, is the place to be.
Big hugs to all of you out there.
Jamsey

[Babeba]

Jamsey,

This may not be what you want to hear - but I would be worried that if you were to find a partner and plunged in deep into a new relationship before you got yourself back on your feet once your divorce is finalized that you may have a hard time of it.. I'm not sure if the term 'rebound girl' is one in your vocabulary at the moment but it might be soon if you're not too cautious!

As a previous poster pointed out, many of us GGs don't have 'looks good in a skirt and can walk in heels' on our little wish lists. What many of us DO have, however, is "confident, open minded and open to new experiences." If you can accept yourself and are in a place where you are stable, you are those things!

[AllieSF]

Jamsey, to play that numbers game I was talking about in my first post here, you will need to put yourself out there in a lot of places where you will meet people, all types of people. If you can make a few places your own "Cheers" bar, restaurant, coffee shop, book store, whatever, "where everyone knows your name", then you will have a much better chance to start meeting other people and hopefully some GG's that will accept you as you are. Or, join some groups where you will be able to put yourself in front of a lot of women in Jamsey mode, and learn how to become casual friends and then network like crazy. I have stopped seriously looking and pursuing a mate (though it is always in the back of my mind) and just settle to meet and talk with as many people as possible in guy or girl mode to make new friends and to "improve my odds". So, if you have those places where Jamsey is known and welcome by staff and patrons, you have just improved your chances to meet someone who accepts you as you are. After that, you ask to meet for coffee or wine someplace else and just talk, and don't talk too much like me, a true Chatty Kathy called Allie. The more people you meet, the more comfortable you get inside, the more natural is your presentation to others and the less taken aback is that new attractive stranger that meets you for the first time. The more you meet the better you get and then one day when you least expect it, you will meet someone that you may want to date. Whoa, wait a minute! That is not the final step or phase. Now you need to go through that fun and not so fun process of getting to know each other. She may be acceptable but not have the personality nor character that you are looking for. Good luck.

[DebbieL]

As my present relationship is finally ending, and I will have new life soon, with cross dressing a major part of it, I made a vow to myself, and the few people that know I CD, that my next relationship with a woman will be with full knowledge of my crossdressing before we start.

Bravo!! It takes a lot of courage, but in the long run, you will probably be glad you did. The thing you need to know is that when you start sharing your secret with a number of women you don't know very well, it won't be a secret for very long. This is not a bad thing. Ironically, gossip can cut both ways. When word gets out that you are transgendered, and a cross-dresser, word will reach bisexual women who will be very interested in you.


So, that said, how much of a turn-off or a problem will it be with the women I choose to date, once it becomes knowledge that I am a cross dresser?

Now I know on this site there are a lot of supporting wives/girl friends, but are they the exception rather than the rule?

When I put pictures of Debbie in my profile on Match.com and added a paragraph about being transgengered, about 1,000 women viewed that profile, and only 7 were interested. The good news is that I only wanted to find one. I dated all 6 of them, 1 thought I was not feminine enough, another that I was too feminine. Another was living with her elderly mother and wasn't interested in moving in or getting married unless mom could move in with us. Another had an autistic son who would have been part of the package. Another was submissive didn't think I was dominant enough, and another was dominant and didn't think I was submissive enough. All of this over the course of about 4 weeks.

I was starting to get discouraged, and I got an e-mail reading "Dude, you're wearing a dress, what's that about?". I send back a nicely worded reply, explaining that I was transgendered and made the mistake of not telling my first wife until 3 weeks after we moved in together, and didn't want to start any new relationship without having this out in the open and knowing that they are OK with it. I gave her my phone number, and an hour later, she called me.

I was working out of town, so we talked on the phone almost every night for about 3 weeks, and by the time we finally got together, she had decided that she wanted at LEAST a on-night stand. She must have enjoyed herself, because we kept dating, got engaged, and got married.

Lee will go out with me as Debbie, but she doesn't want me to dress too "****ty". Also, if I want to wear women's clothes without the wig and bra, I need to be clean-shaved and my hair has to be clean, long, and fluffed out. She referrs sto my suit coat as my "Purse with Sleeves", and when it got too hot for the suit coat, she told me to go buy a purse and start carrying it. Now I've gotten quite used to it, and even though it's cooling off, she wants me to keep carrying the purse so that I don't fill my jacket with extra "stuff". My coat looks much nicer when It's not stuffed with napkins (a habit I got as a father wiping up spills after my children), wallet, cell phone, kindle, ear-buds, keys,... to the point where my pockets are hanging wide open and I look like I have a gun in the inside pocket.

My wife wants me to go shopping with her. She loves that I can help her with finding things her size, and she likes my suggestions and even steps out of her comfort zone at my prompting. Overall, once she gets used to it, she often loves my choices. Often, I playfully pout when she pulls out a longer skirt, or dress pants, but often, I try them on, and really like her choices. Many of them can be worn by Debbie AND Rex.


How difficult do you think it will be for me, I haven't been on the dating scene in probably over 18 years, to find a woman who is accepting of crossdressing?

I am not talking about casual dating, but once it gets beyond that point, where there is interest by both parties in having more than a casaul relationship.

You might want to asses the assets of both your feminine (Jamesy) and masculine (James?) sides. What's great about each? What are the strengths and weaknesses of each personality?

For example, I found that as Rex, I was very smart, very intellectual, and a bit of a "Know it All". When I couldn't play with girls and got beat up by the boys, I turned to books and read whole libraries. When I was in the hospital, mom gave me "Brain teasers" to stimulate my mind and challenge me intellectually whlie I was in an oxygen tent and not allowed to have radio, television, or any electrical devices (back in the days when Vacuum Tubs and Oxygen didn't mix well). On the other hand, sometimes I'd start pulling up useless factoids even when they weren't needed. I was also a clown. Every halloween, I would want to go as a girl, but would settle for a clown or a hobo. To keep the boys from beating me up, I'd get them laughing. Even if they were laughing AT me, at least they were only laughing and not hitting me or throwing rocks or snapping my spine.

When I began exploring Debbie, I realized that entirely different demensions of my personality came out. Because I had to make sure that everything was EXACTLY the way it was before I took it out of my mom's drawers, Debbie was very detailed and impeccable. Debbie also did the laundry and cooked meals, and did most of the chores my mom used to do before she went back to working full-time, and enjoyed doing them (especially when I could do them dressed). In addition, Debbie is more aware of appearance, doiing make-up, hair, and removing body hair, plucking eyebrows, and all of the other little details. Rex might go without a bath or shower for 4-5 days (my dad always wanted to save money on water and hot water). Debbie on the other hand, might take a shower in the morning and another in the early evening to make sure there was now shadow before going out.

Debbie was also the social butterfly. When I stopped trying to hide, and I started making friends in the gay community, Debbie felt safer and more willing to socialize. Since the girls thought I was gay, they often invited me to hang out with them, and in high school most of my friends were gay or female. In college, I went to school with 800 women and 25 men, most of whom were gay. Ironically, I suffered more when I tried to "butch up" for my work-study job on the stage crew here we were using carpentry skills and welding skills to build stages, sets, platforms, and scenary.

Debbie also enjoyed reading erotica rather than just pictures. As a result, I learned much more about how to please a woman, and learned that they could have LOTS of orgasms if I was willing to use my mouth, hands, and toys. I also paid very close attention to the lesbian scenes in adult movies, so that I could better please my partners. These abilities first manifested themselves during my drug induced black-outs, but later, when I started making love sober, I didn't even try to have "normal" sex, but never had trouble pleasing my partners. By the time I lost my virginity at 21, it was almost a let-down. I wasn't that big, and didn't have orgasms. But I loved satisfying my partner. It was like I woud put myself into her body as I was pleasing her.

Debbie was also much more patient and supportive, and very compassionate toward others. Debbie also had much more honesty, authenticity, and integrity. Debbie might be late to a party, but never to speaking engagements or important meetings. All of these traits made Debbie a very effective sponsor of people in 12 step programs, and a very good and persuasive writer.

Debbie also likes to outperform as feminine. In a leadership program, where one of the measures was how many people registered into a program, I set records off the chart registering more people than all but 2 other people in the class, and the other two people worked in the same rooms I did and we worked really well together. We called it "Debbie in the Suit". Using feminine strategies, I can get teams of dozens or even hundreds of people in different parts of a company, and even different companies, to cooperate even though I have zeo "command and control" authority. Debbie is a powerful leader.

Once I began no look at what Debbie brought to the party, what girl WOULDN'T want to date Debbie?!!

For that matter, what employer wouldn't want to HIRE Debbie?!!

What Client wouldn't want to ENGAGE Debbie??!!



I am confused by some of the other sites I visited when that question is asked of a GG.

Any comments will be greatly appreciated.

Jamsey

[kimdl93]

so much good stuff here - I'm not sure I have much new to contribute. Speaking only from my experience, I've been (generally) pleasantly surprised at the way women have responded to my CDing. I didn't quite come out to my first wife - she figured it out for herself when she saw how enthusiastically I responded to wearing her things (a little role reversal foreplay). She put 2 & 2 together but was fine with it. (she did "out" me during our divorce, but I attribute that more to the emotional intensity of that moment). I came out to my present wife when we got serious and she has been incredibly accepting.

I've also been surprised recently by the response from women I've met while dressed. I was at a gay bar for karaoke several weeks ago. Two very attractive (and young) women approached me. I had long conversations with both women. I was flattered and there was certainly potential for a hook up, but I am happily married. Honestly, if they found me appealing then there is hope for anyone ;)

[IMkrystal]

Let's be realistic, look at what women might typically strive for when considering a man to date and possibly have a relationship with:

a great personality
intelligent
witty
handsome (pretty)
ability to be a good provider (as in contribute something to the table)
values

Many women think it's kind of cool, as long as it's not in their own backyard.
I think men are looking for the same things. At Least I Am! (By the way, if a man said this in their dating profile, most women would consider it arrogant) How can women think this is kind of cool yet at the same time reject crossdressing:eek:



I get told that a lot,but there are GG's out there just like me.
I feel like the crossdresser on a deserted island, in the middle of the ocean, dying of thirst! :ms:


My 'feeling' is, based on my limited experience wrt this issue, that Most GG's oppose an M2F transgendered mate BUT that there are significant numbers who would be not only accepting but truly embracing IF youre lucky enough to come across them.
I guess I am not lucky:brolleyes: