The great closet debate.

[suzy1]

I will remember this year as the year of the great closet debate.
The moderators hovered over there keyboards ready to close the thread. And a few of us got a bit heated too.
P.Ms flashed from member to member saying things that could not be said on the forum………………

…………Now tell me that wasn’t fun!

SUZY

[kimdl93]

I don't mind a vigorous discussion, even a heated debate, so long as people are respectful of each other, and actually read what one another has written.

[Cynthia Anne]

I can agree with Kim on this one! However I might add that 'they' need to understand what they're reading and why it was posted in the first place! Hugs!

[TGMarla]

That wasn't fun!!!

There. I said it. I didn't mean it, but I said it. :tongueout

[Kaz]

Well, I hope it has ended, but as we get new members I am sure it will reappear at some point! It was to fun to observe and crap to be part of, but I suspect most of us are still intact?

[suchacutie]

Suzy, for me it was educational. In some ways I'm not sure that I'm pleased with all I learned, but knowledge is always helpful. Thus, I'm glad that it was brought up because I'm not sure how else I would have found out about the polarization of this issue.

Those things that are good for you are not always fun, but if they are good they are worth it. To me, the debate was very much worth it, even the misinterpretations!

:)

tina

[Kittyagain]

Suzy, I am glad I missed that one. Lots of nice people here so the wounds must have healed without much of a scar.

Kitty

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Suzy, To each thier own the only rule about crossdressing is that there are no rules.
Enough said.

Orchid

[DebbieL]

This is a debate that has probably been going on since Brahma posed as a woman to seduce Siva to produce Vishnu - a legend that is over 10,000 years old.

It's unfortunate that so many of us had to hide in the closet for so long. For me, getting into the closet would have been an upgrade. Until I was a Senior in College, I kept debbie between the mattresses. There are many people who suspected, and would have been thrilled to support me, if only I would have gotten honest with them about it. Instead, many of the suspicions and assumptions were far worse that the secret I was actually keeping. Some even suspected I was a "Ted Bundy" serial killer type.

Ironically, many people in my life were telling me to "Be yourself", because it was obvious that the "man character" I had created was just a role, not the real me. I often wondered if my father would have wanted me to "Be Myself" if he realized that the real me was Debbie. I got the chance to find out just before he died. He asked me to "Be Myself" and for some reason I'll never understand, I packed some very feminine items including short shorts, satin shapewear shirts, and some other items. I decided to dress up and let out Debbie. I had grown out my hair, and I styled it with a blow dryer. Ironically, he was delighted, and loved that I was so attentive and loving. When I was scratching his back with my long fingernails, he asked "where did you learn to take such good care of me", I said "from you dad, from you". In the last conversations I had while he could still think, he let me know that he loved me just as I was, and was glad he got to know the real me. He died 18 hours later.

[Kaz]

This is a debate that has probably been going on since Brahma posed as a woman to seduce Siva to produce Vishnu - a legend that is over 10,000 years old.

It's unfortunate that so many of us had to hide in the closet for so long. For me, getting into the closet would have been an upgrade. Until I was a Senior in College, I kept debbie between the mattresses. There are many people who suspected, and would have been thrilled to support me, if only I would have gotten honest with them about it. Instead, many of the suspicions and assumptions were far worse that the secret I was actually keeping. Some even suspected I was a "Ted Bundy" serial killer type.

Ironically, many people in my life were telling me to "Be yourself", because it was obvious that the "man character" I had created was just a role, not the real me. I often wondered if my father would have wanted me to "Be Myself" if he realized that the real me was Debbie. I got the chance to find out just before he died. He asked me to "Be Myself" and for some reason I'll never understand, I packed some very feminine items including short shorts, satin shapewear shirts, and some other items. I decided to dress up and let out Debbie. I had grown out my hair, and I styled it with a blow dryer. Ironically, he was delighted, and loved that I was so attentive and loving. When I was scratching his back with my long fingernails, he asked "where did you learn to take such good care of me", I said "from you dad, from you". In the last conversations I had while he could still think, he let me know that he loved me just as I was, and was glad he got to know the real me. He died 18 hours later.

Debbie, this is so moving... I am crying tears of joy.

[ReineD]

he asked "where did you learn to take such good care of me", I said "from you dad, from you". In the last conversations I had while he could still think, he let me know that he loved me just as I was, and was glad he got to know the real me. He died 18 hours later.

What a beautiful experience! Thank you for sharing it. :hugs:

[kimdl93]

What a tremendous memory to have of your father.

FYI, I'm sure there were people throughout my life that were certain I was something awful - a child molester or whatever. When my x outed me indiscriminantly to friends and family, most of the just ignored her, a few asked if I was gay, and life went on. I can't think of anyone (at least anyone that was actually a part of my life) that ostracized me as a result of her revelations about me.

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

Crikey Suzy u love to test boundaries huh. I still got the doors shut and the hinges are rusting but the puter takes up most of the room in here. Damn that stupid light keeps flickering too. Yes, yes yes yes get out and declare yourself to the world, No no no I fear that stupid door, Oh dear here I go again.

[Cheryl T]

The great closet debate? What did you settle on? Mahogany or pine?

Cedar I hope...keeps the moths from my skirts and smells ever so good...

[Maria 60]

I was watching most of it from the sideline, even though i didn't get involved in it, it was very interesting and educating at the same time. It's like we are all different but at the same time we are all the same. Thanks for the fun Suzy.

[Sophie86]

Cedar I hope...keeps the moths from my skirts and smells ever so good...

I'm with Cheryl on this.

And a person would have to be either stupid or malicious to disagree. :devil:

[suit]

Cedar I hope...keeps the moths from my skirts and smells ever so good...

I expected an off white ,taffeta or silk lined ceder closet . with glass floor and ceiling l.e.d. lights climate controled to less than 15 % rh. moterized rack system, and a bath and a half attached.

[Frédérique]

I will remember this year as the year of the great closet debate.
The moderators hovered over there keyboards ready to close the thread. And a few of us got a bit heated too.
P.Ms flashed from member to member saying things that could not be said on the forum…………Now tell me that wasn’t fun!

No, it wasn’t fun AT ALL, in fact we are not yet able to talk about these “discussions” in the past tense. In case you haven’t noticed, someone recently declared that leaving the closet requires “balls,” so here we go again. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again (via the written word) – I’m getting REALLY sick of this!

What it all boils down to is males in female clothing doing what they do best, i.e. act like males. I have nothing in common with these individuals, so I try to stay away from this masculine mud-slinging, cross my legs at the knee and think my beloved girly thoughts. In many ways, this section is like a boys’ clubhouse, where (tee hee) some of us like to dress up, while others (like myself) are actively seeking an apart-ness from all MALE nonsense. Perhaps you can imagine how utterly disappointing it is for a sissified femme boy fairy called Freddy to find an oasis like this amidst a sea of male attitudes, only to find out that the girls (for the most past) are actually boys, and they have no appreciation for effeminacy. I would say TRUE effeminacy, but that very well might start off another discussion that goes nowhere. Shut it down...
:sigh:

I love you, suzy, but please don’t keep this closeted vs. un-closeted debate going any longer – it deserves a decent burial, preferably in that sea of testosterone I alluded to a few sentences ago…

PS -- I know that by submitting this post I'm keeping the topic "open," but YOU brought it up! :heehee:

[ReineD]

A few thoughts!

Susy, are you trying to start up the debate again? I don't see any other purpose for this thread.

Freddy, up until you posted, the thread was humming along nicely with a lack of accusations on either side, but now you've just drawn a line in the sand again by accusing those who have strong opinions that differ from yours of acting like males ... which you well know is not the highest form of praise for many members here. This is just the type of post that is taunting to others.

None of the mods here, including myself, wish to see this debate start up again. It is divisive, we've seen that it accomplishes nothing, and it does nothing for the general support culture we wish to encourage here.

I caution anyone posting after me to keep this in mind. If I see anyone taking up Freddy's challenge in kind, I will delete both posts and close this thread.

[Roberta Lynn]

You want a closet debate?
Just tell my wife Roberta needs more room in our closet for her clothes.:hiding:

[suzy1]

Reine, the last thing I want is to start up is the debate again.
I see the funny side in most [but not all] things in life.

“Life is much too important to be taken seriously” Oscar Wilde.
It was just a fun thread!

I did not foresee others missing this simple point and getting all serious here.
If we can’t have a good giggle what hope is there for any of us?

I would never want to criticise what is a wonderful and supporting forum like this.
But if I ever did it would be to say that some members seem to have lost there sense of humor. I feel sorry for them.

If I have to tone down my humour here I will. [But it will not be easy]

A slightly detuned, SUZY

[donnalee]

Frederique, if you really want to be in a hornet's nest, step into the middle of a feud among the females in my family. I believe that I posted some time ago that I would rather go ballroom dancing in the middle of an active minefield.
Guys have no exclusivity as far as conflicts go, and are, in my opinion, a lot less likely to hold a long-term grudge. I have often thought that the Hatfields and McCoys' hostilities owed their longevity to the women of the family.
:battingeyelashes:
Don't get me wrong; I respect and adore most women, but know that when you have people in your life, you get the whole package and cannot separate the more from the less desirable traits.
:eek: