Interesting Conversation with Hotel Clerks

[Paula_56]

If you've read some of my other posts, I love checking in as Paul and then showing up at the front desk sometime later as Paula. This trip was no different while checking in, the desk clerk asked "are you here for business or Leisure?" "Both I replied, today, I plan on visiting an old friend here in town with a surprise visit"

So I head back to my room presto-chango and come back about an hour later to get a bottle of water.

At first they didn't notice, then when I spoke they read me, and I said "remember I said I was going to surprise an old friend?"

Their eyes lit up and they smiled. The one girl kept saying wow you look fabulous! Wow you look bee's! They other girl ask what scent I had on?

I asked "Do I look OK?" The older women answered "You look better then I do when I go out!"

I don't know why but I do love this inter change, it's funny because for years I use to sneak out of hotels for fear of being "seen" by the staff. Now I seek it out funny how we change?

[connie johnson]

Paula.

You look good. Hope you had fun with your friend. I wish I had the guts to go out like that, but I would never pass.

[AndreaCD1963]

Paula - you do look great, and cudo's to you for enjoying who you are.

Connie - "passing" is a state of mind, ALL of us pass --- as unique individuals who are free to express ourselves in any the ways that we want to! It's been said many times before, but is so true ... We have nothing to fear but fear itself!

[connie johnson]

Andrea.

I can not "pass" at all. I have facial hair, and my wife will not let me shave. We talk about going to Miami or Key west and me getting dressed and going out. Maybe at that time she will let me shave once, but i will never look as good as Paula.

[AndreaCD1963]

Fair enough .. facial hair does make it difficult to even remotely pass LOL

I had the same issue for years (had a mustache since I was about 15, which I finally shaved off about 5 years ago and now can't stand any stubble or evidence of a beard showing at all, in either mode)

[Paula_56]

I can't belive I "pass" "blend" "not cause peple to run screaming" just yesterday, I woman stopped me and asked where the Apple sotre was in the mall, I guess this means I look like a typical woman to most passer bys?

[Cheryl T]

It's all attitude...if you carry yourself with grace and dress for the venue no one notices you. The first impression is the one that registers with people since people are so focused on their routine.
I used to worry about "passing". Now I just go out and enjoy myself doing the things I love to do and most people just react to me as they would any other woman.

[insearchofme]

You look great! You also surprised the people at the front desk!

[Marie-Elise]

I sometimes think a lot about being able to do something like that. It would be nice but I don't know that I will ever get there. Excellent story and you look great.

[Jane G]

:)That's such a positive and fun story. Thanks

[xcdmargo]

go to Key West during Fantasy Fest and you'll be fine. Miami not so much

["Mary"]

Yes - very fun. I may try that interchange sometime. Thanks for sharing Paula, and you DO look great.

[Wendy_Marie]

we take our fun when and when we can....You look great...

[SarahLynn]

Paula you look every bit the lady you are presenting in this picture. If you and I were to pass in the hall I would take you for the lady you present. And give her a longer look too. Not a look of, "hummm, I wonder, but rather a look of: Hummmmmm, does she or doesn't she?" Indeed I might flirt a bit and even consider to asking you for a date. Mind you, I'd be dressed in all male outer-wear as I have not 'come out' to any but my SO.

SarahLynn

[danielle.cd]

I can't belive I "pass" "blend" "not cause peple to run screaming" just yesterday, I woman stopped me and asked where the Apple sotre was in the mall, I guess this means I look like a typical woman to most passer bys?

your a guy? i thought this was a gg telling us a story about the hotel clerks. lol

[linda allen]

Paula, you look great and you're dressed with class. I say you pass as a woman any day.

[donnalee]

You look MAHVELOUS!!

(Apologies to Billy Crystal)

[Kaz]

Paula, thank you for this post. It has helped my thinking enormously! I too have been terrified about getting past reception. I am reasonably okay when out, but getting out through a hotel reception for me is the current psychological blockage!

But then... you do look very feminine! :daydreaming:

[Leilani]

I don't want to be the wet blanket but I find it uncomfortable when people do this as it seems like it is throwing it in someone's face when they are in a position to be unable to respond in any honest fashion. By making it obvious as to who you are by stating "remember I said I was going to surprise an old friend?", you are putting them in a position where, if they are uncomfortable with the idea of crossdressers, they are unable to either remove themselves from it or respond in an honest way since they are representing the company they work for. Again, it could just be me but I think that, just as I do not bring up politics or any other topic that could result in strong opinions by an employee that I am dealing with, I would not force this issue into the open on them. If they were the ones to bring it up initially then I might see it a bit different but I would not bring it up myself to them. Just like if I want to try something on in a store I ask if they mind if I try it on rather than just state I want to try this/these items on. Small difference but one that I think respects an essentially trapped persons (the employees) feelings and could make them ultimately feel a little more comfortable in the long run. Hope I don't sound like a jerk but that is my thought on this.

[Paula_56]

I don't want to be the wet blanket but I find it uncomfortable when people do this as it seems like it is throwing it in someone's face when they are in a position to be unable to respond in any honest fashion. By making it obvious as to who you are by stating "remember I said I was going to surprise an old friend?", you are putting them in a position where, if they are uncomfortable with the idea of crossdressers, they are unable to either remove themselves from it or respond in an honest way since they are representing the company they work for. Again, it could just be me but I think that, just as I do not bring up politics or any other topic that could result in strong opinions by an employee that I am dealing with, I would not force this issue into the open on them. If they were the ones to bring it up initially then I might see it a bit different but I would not bring it up myself to them. Just like if I want to try something on in a store I ask if they mind if I try it on rather than just state I want to try this/these items on. Small difference but one that I think respects an essentially trapped persons (the employees) feelings and could make them ultimately feel a little more comfortable in the long run. Hope I don't sound like a jerk but that is my thought on this.

Leilani

Thanks for your honestly, all too often we don't get any crtizism here. I'll consider what you wrote.

[Wallaone]

Paula, great story. You look sweet!

[Leilani]

No problem Paula. Hope I didn't sound like a jerk though. It was not my intention at all.

[Leslie Langford]

Paula, I personally think you look fabulous, and while Leilani's cold shower/reality check may have been well-intentioned, I don't see you doing anything wrong. You're just doing what comes naturally to any GG, which is to be a bit flirtatious while fishing for compliments as a means of self-affirmation. After all, isn't it a truism that women dress more to impress other women as opposed to men because of the way they typically try to compete with each other in the looks department?

If you were wearing a tutu, fishnets, 6" "f@#k me" stilettos, make up by Lady Gaga and a Phyllis Diller type fright wig as some fetishistic crossdressers who are into public humiliation might, I could see the point about perhaps making these hotel clerks (and other GG's that you have interacted with) uncomfortable. But the truth is, you act and dress in a manner that is respectful towards women, and most GG's will respond positively to that. From our past exchange of posts and PM's, we can both attest to the fact that we have always been treated with courtesy and respect by female SA's, wait staff, and other GG's that we have come into contact with because of our "pay it forward" style of crossdressing.

If anything, I seem to attract SA's the way honey attracts bees whenever I go into a ladies' wear store or the women's section of a department store - they can't seem to resist falling all over me and practically frog-marching me into a fitting room and plying me with clothes to try on, so intent are they in serving me. And from what I have gathered, that seems to have been your experience as well so far.

To me, it is a combination of the curiosity factor and a genuine interest on their part to help us, and on more than one occasion, I have been complimented on my courage to be who I really am inside. In other words, a far cry from expressions of revulsion or disgust and overt mocking that I was conditioned to expect because of the innate fears and self-doubts that all of us crossdressers wrestle with at one time or another, and often fueled by our non-supportive SO's as a way of keeping us in line. It is only once I screwed up the courage to go out in public en femme and see for myself what the score really was that I came to this realization, and now there is no holding "Leslie" back.

Don't let the naysayers sway you too much with their negativity and own self-doubts. Follow your heart as you have been doing so far, and you will continue to do just fine. It sounds to me as if no animals or small children were harmed in your "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" with these particular hotel clerks, and if anything, you actually made their day. So really, where's the problem?

The way I see it, it's actually crossdressers like you and I who are providing a very positive image of who we are and what we do. If anything, we are performing a public service on behalf of both the crossdressing community as well as the public at large by providing this type of education and keeping the "haters" in check.

[kimdl93]

Paula, I don't think there was any great harm in surprising the desk clerks with your presentations as Paul and Paula. It seems to me you go to a considerable length to present as in attractive, tasteful manner...and from the conversations you shared, the clerks took the surprise in stride. I've done something somewhat similar - appearing en drabb and en femme on alternate days at the same store. The SAs were a bit surprised by the change, but all the more helpful.

I think many women find our CDing to be quite interesting and often respond warmly and with genuine curiosity about our lives. I really enjoy talking with people about this aspect of myself.

[Sam-antha]

You look great, simply great. I liked the idea of the change presentation, a fun thing that gave the reception gilrs something to chew over when you were gone. I like.
~Samm

[xcdmargo]

First I must say Paula you look great.
I've been finding that more and more when I travel that it's not that big a deal. But and it's a big but I do not put myself in any situations where there are young people around. I think presenting myself as female to adults is fine but I do not ever want a parent to have to explain 'why is that man dressed like that" or have the adult make some snide comment when children are around. I feel that adults should've learned by now to live and let live but kids they have not learned that yet.
I also always make every effort to use the family rest room facilities so as not to cause any problems

margo