Advice from the 6 ft. plus girls

[Diana Bain]

Having started my adventure into the outside world...I need advice please from the tall ladies who have ventured out. So far it has just been walks with my wife around the neighborhood. Next, the mall! I stand six feet one...size 11 shoe...and we'll, not so small hands either. I'm just trying to pass the best I can...with the understanding I could easily be "outed." My wife says I can pull it off (she's a sweetheart). So how can I blend in? Jeans (sorry Karen), capri's, skirt, dress..........help!:battingeyelashes:

[Cari]

The more I try to hide or look smaller the more attention I seem to draw.
Shouldn't admit this but have done best after a few drinks when I just relaxed.
Not much help there If I figure out whats hapenning Ill let you know :-)

I have noticed that scaling accessories and jewelry to my size helps
If I carry a tiny purse or wear thin chains and dainty jewelry it makes me look even bigger.

[Mikaela]

If you wear heels, own it.
Dress for your body type. The book Dress Your Best has little blurbs for each type of figure and the broken down by height.

And what Cari said about scale is very appropriate. If you wear a very fine chain belt, it's just going to get lost. Stuff like that.

[ReineD]

I'm 5' 9", size 8. I wear size 11 shoes. My standard heel height for every day when I wear jeans is 3", which makes me 6'. When my SO and I go out at night, I sometimes wear 4" heels, which makes me 6' 1".

You are not too tall. Just be sure to dress for your age and height. A GG your size would not wear flouncy, frilly, short skirts for example, or too much pink, or cutsey tops with little kittens or hearts on them. These styles and colors look good on young, petite girls. IMO.

You can wear flats or kitten heels, with skirts or dresses at knee length or just above, or you can wear capris, jeans, or slacks. The importance is to dress the way the other GGs dress for the venue. If you're going to the mall, wear jeans or capris in the summer, or a jean or other casual skirt. If you're going to a nice restaurant or a classical concert for example, wear a nicer dress. If you live in an urban area and are walking around downtown, dress as a GG would for the office with a nice skirt suit or a dress. If out in a small town, dress casually.

At a club, anything goes. :)

[Paula_56]

6'1" also, I am constantly comparing every woman I see to me in terms of height. We are tall for girls, but not so much that we don't blend with others, especially when we are in flats and a 5'10" girl is in heels. At close inspection, we will appear tall but compared to the crowd around us when that includes men we fit right in. We as TG look at a woman very close and examine her height other people do not, and a 6'1" girl/person doesn't really draw a lot of attention. Along with that dressing nicely amd appropriatly for your age and venue puts you in the blend zone. Also just being confident and feeling relaxed makes a huge diference.

A trick on the hand short nails press on or natrual in a french manicure make hands look fem and smaller. Also cupping your hands makes them 40% smaller

Read some of my easys under my flickr posts for tips, "How's you swing" is a good one.

[Aprilrain]

im 6 feet and full time. i never wear heals it just seems ridiculous to do so. other than that just be yourself and hope for the best!

[Taylor186]

I have a TG/CD friend who is 6' 3" and spends seemingly half her time dressed and goes anywhere and interacts with anyone.

She follows Reine's advice, "just be sure to dress for your age and height [and] for the venue." and does a few other things not mentioned yet:

1) She has worked on her voice so she speaks in a naturally feminine way.
2) She stands, walks and otherwise carries herself in a feminine way.
3) When she enters a venue and meets people she starts the conversation. She feels that helps break the barrier with many people who would otherwise politely stare and wonder.

1 and 2 are not natural for her. She has worked hard to create this credible feminine presentation, and the many and varied people she interacts with seem to appreciate the effort and generally respond favorably.

[Meg East]

I am over 6'3" and limit myself to about 2" to 2 1/2" heels. I know a female trail attorney who stands 5'11" and wears three inch heels to court because she thinks her height gives her an edge.

I have a prescription from my doctor to wear 1 1/2 heels to help my back and ankles.

Remember your mother's advise,"stand up straight".

[juno]

I am 6'3". I showed a GG friend a picture of a CD/TS group, and she commented on another tall girls being a bit hunched-over, perhaps shy of her tallness. The GG friend said "Tall girls act tall!", so try to be proud of your height. You will stand out no matter what, so try to stand out as a woman. High heels look just as good or better on a tall female. However, it helps to be outdoors and/or in places where people are spread out a bit so that there are fewer cues about just how tall you are with heels.

If possible, it would also help to hang out with a women's basketball team. One of my wife's doctors is an ex women's basketball player, and is taller than me.

[pernille d]

It's got a lot to do with the all over image. Ie clothing, body shape, and posture. I am 6,2 and wear 3" heels , I have often wondered if I look to tall but I have never had any akward moments. Through my job o come in contact and work with models , and I find my self often feeling small when a model walks around in heels .

So all In all there are tall girls out there and also tall girls that wear heals ,I feel my body fits my hight and lucky for me I have long legs so I think more look at my legs than actually how tall I am , so it's all down to the individual and how they feel the whole look is , ( otherwise just get out there and see what happens )?

[Diana Bain]

Thank you everybody for your advice. It has given me more confidence...'onward and upward through the pink fog."

[Eryn]

Diana, I'm 6'2", 165 pounds. 1% of the GGs out there are our height in flats. That means that in any typical walk through a mall you're very likely to come eye-to-eye with a GG of your height and she's likely to take notice of you. To the more average people all tall people are just tall and aren't examined all that closely.

So, what do you do with those who give you a second glance? Hold your head up, back straight, and enjoy going about your business! Eye contact and smile with women. Some may have some suspicions about you, but that is all they are. In the fullness of the experience it doesn't mean a thing to you!

In all the time I've been conscious of CDing, I've never seen a stranger in public that I could say for certain was a CDer. Sure, I've seen ladies who had some masculine traits, but I know GGs who also display those traits. Nobody is going to risk embarrassing themselves by treating you as anything but the gender you are presenting.

Oh, except drunks and teenagers. Avoid if possible!

[shoegazer]

I am 5'11" and I rarely wear heels because it just makes me stand out even more. I know 2 GG's who are taller than me and they almost never wear heels either, most GG's over 5'10" don't wear heels often and if they do they are typically kitten heels, in my experience.

Now if you are talking about a club situation or somewhere else where you don't mind standing out, then that is another story.. but walking around the mall in 3-4 inch heels you are going to look.. well, like a crossdresser.

I would echo the advice given before of make sure your clothing is age appropriate and venue appropriate, and that it fits well.. ie make sure your pants/jeans are not too tight or too loose, have the correct length, etc. Having ill fitting or inappropriate clothing is something that will make people take notice of you, especially if you already look somewhat unusual due to your height/size

[Joanna41]

Reine has some great advice...I would add that you wanna stay away from clothes with stripes. Go with solid colors. I'm 6 foot on bare feet and I usually wear a variety of heel sizes. Just depends on what you want to wear and where you are going to be. I wear a size 13 in women's heels. My fiance is just over 5 foot so when she wears a high heel I try to wear one less then hers to help the balance out a little. If you don't want to tower over your wife jeans and sneakers work great if she can wear heels too then capri pants or a nice above knee skirt or dress will work great too. Your accessories make a difference also...try different combos and see what works best for.the both of you! Good luck!

Joanna

[marlaNYC]

as Mikaela said, "If you wear heels, own it." i'm 6'4" and wear a women's 12-14 (depends on the maker). my greatest realization to echo Mikaela was when i had a lady friend who was 6'7" and always wore 2-3" heels, and she always carried herself tall and straight. i felt miniscule next to her and carried myself taller because of it, which has been amazing training, even though i don't wear more than a 1.5" heel unless it's a special occasion. good luck.

[kristinacd55]

6' here with size 11 shoes too.....just what's been said already is great advice. The main thing is to blend and not stand out like a sore thumb. It's great your wife wants to go out with you and is supportive too! Someday, mine will too..... :)

[kimdl93]

I'm 6'2" with size 13 ( womens) shoes and fairly large hands. I wear 2x plus tops and size 14 bottoms. So, I've got lots of structural issues to deal with. I'm pretty sure I'm read easily and often by the people I encounter. Added to that, its been intolerably hot down here all summer, so Ive tended towards shorts, capris and tank tops for most outings, even though I probably should have covered my arms/shoulders.

At first I was very nervous, but after a while I relaxed and made it a point to make eye contact and smile a lot. With few exceptions, I find I'm treated with warmth and respect by virtually everyone I encounter. So, my advice is to relax, be open and friendly. You'll receive the same in return.

Beyond that - take note of the number of tall women out there. We may be in the minority, but we're not alone. And note that despite what the magazine covers may suggest, most of us are decidely imperfect in some way. Its not that unimaginable that you and I may blend in among the real women of the world.

ps: I have several nieces who are over 6' tall - all gorgeous. And they wear heels whenever they feel like it...

[Kaitlyn Michele]

kim that is a good story about the reality of it..
the BOTTOM LINE is that if you do it...it is unlikely you will get hassled...and you will find that after a couple times it will get more and more comfortable..it is just like anything..practice makes perfect..

i'm 6'2 as well... there are tall women out there... they may come up to you if you are passing well and share a comment...people do say things like OMG you are tall, or how tall are you, or did you play basketball..haha...
if you wear heels you will draw extra attention..

wearing the "appropriate" clothes is also key.. women know what's in and what's not.. what looks nice on you and what doesnt... it doesnt mean you will get hassled, but if you wear a cocktail dress to the mall, a mini skirt and hose and strappy heels to a high street you will get noticed..

my experience is different than eryn's. if she hasn't seen crossdressers, she isnt looking! LOL
I have seen many crossdressers out and about... one this weekend on chestnut st in philly..she was broad shouldered, and built quite large even for a guy..and wore a red pleated mini skirt, cami and one of the those little sweaters...it was like she wanted to emphasize her size... my daughter was with me, and she pointed her out...as well as the people that passed her and broke out laughing and looked back... i told my daughter that this person was probably very excited and happy to be out and about ...and she said...well maybe if she didn't dress like that people wouldn't look at her... about 10 minutes later my daughter said out of the blue that she "felt sorry" for him, and i told her don't feel sorry... that she was doing what was right for her, and reiterated that she was just doing it because she liked it..and lots of people look different in all kinds of ways..(my daughters 14 btw)... and that was it...

the previous monday, it was a black cocktail dress, diamond jewelry, impeccable stunning sexy black heels (4')....at the cherry hill mall.. she caught my eye from the other side of the mall...totally out of place..
and it turns out i knew her from years ago!!! so i said hi...and updated her on my life... i actually commented .."all dressed up for the mall"..and she said..."hey i dont get out much, so i'm wearing my best outfit"... we hugged and she went off to macy's to buy more heels..

those are two real life reports... i think they are empowering... to be fair, it is what it is... you either go out or you don't.. you either get clocked or you don't... if you are dressing for fun...DECIDE in advance what you want out of it...dress accordingly...do things you are comfortable with, and enjoy yourself...if you have a bad moment..move on..be smart and avoid a bad situation... i have lived these bad moments, but they are far outweighed by the good...in fact, getting read, being mocked, being smirked at is not nearly as bad as you think..and once it happens, you realize that you have been avoiding a petty irritant like it was the black plague...and you may be much less anxious in the future..

your height may draw attention, but its just part of being you.

[Sally24]

The others have given good advise. I would add that height is only the first thing people notice. Next they measure your general shape, then how you move yourself and posture. Of course all this is in a second or two. Think of it like crossing the road. You don't checkout the make and model of cars. Your eyes and brain measure speed, size, trajectory and general threat level in a fraction of a second.

The more female "things" you can show to their eyes, the more likely you are to pass. Tall reads man, but slim reads woman. If you can reduce the apparent size of your waist and increase your hips and bum, that also gets classified as female. How you walk and move can be very female, even from a distance. You don't have to wiggle like a sex pot but a little sway to your hips and bum will not look male!

I've also found some simple facial things that help. Smiling is a big one. If you have problems maintaining a smile I have an alternative. At least for me I find that I look much more female if I hold my lips slightly apart. It gives a hint of a smile, shows a little teeth, and doesn't compress my lips. I actually rest the tips of my canine teeth together and that keeps my mouth open without effort. Try it in front of the mirror. Also, large eyelashes read female. I don't mean drag queen lashes you can see a mile away, just regular false eyelashes. I used to only wear them out in the evening but now I don't leave home without them!

One of the best things you can do is have confidence. I know that's hard when you are first going out but its very true. If you look happy and in control, people won't doubt you as much. Even those that read you can have very positive reactions if you look like a fun, vibrant person.

Now get out there and enjoy yourselves!

[Staci G]

i AM 6'3" in flats, I wear 3 inch heels and dont really worry about it. All my gg friends tell me they love the look when I am in heels I look more natural and walk better than some of them (they say). I don't think I can or will ever "pass" but I am happy being who I am. I only had one run in with some young punk at the mall. He wanted to show off for his friends I told him "you would hate to get your ass beat by a guy in a dress wouldn't you" His friends laughed at him and he shut up. So use the advantage of your height and work it girl.

[SamanthaS]

There are plenty of women who stand 6 feet, but to pull it off is in the eye of the beholder :) Maybe you should just enjoy your time en-fem, and hug that understanding wife of yours every chance you get!

[Jorja]

Everyone has given you execellent advice to this point. For those new girls going out for the first few times, it can be quite challanging and nerve wracking. To convince yourself that you can do it, I suggest that you make a trip to a supermarket (in drab if you must :() in your area around 5:00pm - 7:00pm. This is when the majority of the 9 to 5ers get off of work and go grocery shopping for those things they are out of or forgot to get. Look at the height of the women compared to yourself. You will find many very close to your height or taller. Look for some near your age even a bit younger. Note how they are dressed. Note what they look like. You will see everything from sweats to dress suits, very femminine looking to very masculine looking, very small and petite to very large women.
The thing here is to go and be comfortable with it. Own it!

[Cheryl T]

So how can I blend in? Jeans (sorry Karen), capri's, skirt, dress..........help!:battingeyelashes:

Just wear what you want (so long as it's appropriate for the venue) and hold your head up high. The biggest key to being accepted is CONFIDENCE. I used to be the "deer in the headlights"...now I'm just one of the girls. It's all about feeling that you belong there as much as anyone else. This is especially true when using the ladies room. As has been said before, just do your business and leave...no hanging around and things will be fine. I've been in situations with women, women with children, young girls and all have gone smoothly I feel since I just exude the feeling that I belong there.
By the way, I'm 5'12" and love my heels (size 11 too).

Don't over do the makeup for the mall and dress as you feel comfortable and appropriate....GO FOR IT!

[DebbieL]

The simplest rule is to dress "Situation Appropriate". If you're going to a club, dance, or charity fund-raiser, glam it up, enjoy heels, black stockings or hose, the short skirt, and a big hair wig elegantly styled. On the other hand, if you're going shopping at the mall, boots and jeans are good in the fall.

You may think you want DD breast forms, but consider going with a C-cup initially. You don't want to have people checking out your breasts so carefully that they quickly see that they are silicone (inside or out).

Also, dress age appropriate. One of the great things about dressing like an older woman is that many 40+ and 50+ women have gone through menapause and are starting to look a bit more masculine. Unless you are overdressed, you may not even be noticed, but you will be admired.

If you do get read, own it! Give them a big smile, a wink, and a shrug. I often find that when I do get clocked, that by owning it, and having fun with it, that there are people who have lots of questions and want to know a lot more about me, why I dress, what I like, and what it's like. Most women know the experience of wearing an outfit they that as outside their comfort zone, and it's often very much like cross-dressing to them.

If someone starts to giggle, you want to recognize that this is a fear reaction, a reaction to the unknown and unfamiliar. Getting hostile can trigger some really ugly interactions. On the other hand, having compassion for that fear, that envy, that desire, and the whole tornado of feelings others experience when they realize that are not just a "typical woman".

What you don't realize is that when you do get read, you awaken secret desires in both men and women. Desires that have suppressed for years. Men who may be totally straight and masculine may secretly want to be dressed like you, or to seduce you. Women who may love boys, may have always wandered what it would be like to have a more "feminine" man. They may even be secretly bisexual, always torn between their desire for men and their desire for women, and they see you as the best of both worlds without all the cheating and dishonesty.

Even though you may have no desire to actually participate in these fantasies, and you may be loyal to your wife, having compassion for all of the feelings you awaken in others, will often help you create an environment where you are welcome, supported, and even loved by male and female friends.

Good luck, and great life.

[Duana]

6'2 here and wear up to 5" heels proudly. The bar I hang out at is owned by a 6'9" GG. She's thin with long blond hair. Girls come in all sizes.

[Kerigirl2009]

Just wear NORMAL everyday clothes. Forget the Mini skirt that is for the house. Simple shoes, maybe a wedge. Basically just wear what other women wear to the mall and relax.
Height is not really the issue, I always see lots of tall women and they seem to do just fine, LOL
Finally, just relax and belong in the element. Don't look nervous, just smile and go about your shopping.