mom

[Samantha Thomson]

hello all need some advise i am debating to tell my mom im a crossdresser and a women need susgesting if i should tell her i wear the skirt,bra,blouse,panties,nylons carry a purse wear mascarre,eyeshadow,eyeliner face powderlipstick,purfume nail polish please help if you can below is my make-up colection so you have and idea

[Tina B.]

Hard to answer a thing like that, I don't know what type person your mom is. What country are you in, is it a Conservative area, or liberal city type place? Why do you want to tell her, what is the point, for you, or do you think it would be good for her? Nice make up collection, by the way. Tell us more about you and mom, and maybe someone will be able to give you a piece of advice that is worth having.
Tina B.

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

If you feel like it is something you need to do then you should do it. How old are you? Do you want to stay secret for the rest of your life or can you weather the storm of coming out to family and friends? If i had it all to do over again I would have dressed fully from my late teens and would still be a man physically but would present as a woman outwardly. Ask yourself, "where do I fit"???

[giuseppina]

I agree with the above responders. If this is something you feel you must do, then so be it. However, the Ta-Da method often causes hard feelings. It's likely a better choice to tell your mother in drab. She may well be very shocked by your revelation without the visuals to go with it.

[renee k]

First off, a mother's love is unconditional. So with that in mind, I would approach telling your mother in drab and having pictures of you enfemme to show her. Be ready for questions. Give her some time to digest things. If she's any kind of mom. She'll accept your point of view.

Renee

[Samantha Thomson]

thanks all for your susgestions and thoughts on if i should i talked to my sister and she knows and she thinks i should say nothing and just be a girl and not tell her so i guess that what this women going to do

[cassandra54]

thanks all for your susgestions and thoughts on if i should i talked to my sister and she knows and she thinks i should say nothing and just be a girl and not tell her so i guess that what this women going to do

that's a good start with your sister. you now have an ally and if and when the time ever becomes right, she can help you tell your mother.

[Stephanie47]

You may want to have the issue with mom probed by your sister. You read about families that toss a son or daughter out of their family if they find out their gay or lesbian. Other families accept it and it never makes more than a small ripple in the pond. Your sister, as a woman growing up, probably discussed more intimate feelings with your mom than a son could ever discuss. If your sister knows and is supportive of your inner being, then she will be your ally and help your mother understand you.

[Mollyanne]

you may want to have the issue with mom probed by your sister. You read about families that toss a son or daughter out of their family if they find out their gay or lesbian. Other families accept it and it never makes more than a small ripple in the pond. Your sister, as a woman growing up, probably discussed more intimate feelings with your mom than a son could ever discuss. If your sister knows and is supportive of your inner being, then she will be your ally and help your mother understand you.

makes sense to me!!!!! Btw, that's a fine collection of cosmetics there.

Molly

[Ressie]

She may have already figured it out. One step into your room would make it clear to me.

[juno]

I told my mother that I like women's clothes, talked for 5 minutes, then went and cam back fully dressed. She was very positive, told me the name I would have had if born female, and had some eye makeup suggestions. Of course, I have always been feminine, and she used to give me nail polish, and borrow her female doll clothes to dress my Raggedy Andy. So, it was not a surprise.

I prefer honesty. Even if she doesn't like it, mothers can be very good at accepting their children no matter what. It is likely that she will find out eventually, so I prefer to share and deal with it. If you live at home, things might not be so easy if she is unhappy, but is also very likely to know already.

[giuseppina]

One other comment: There are a lot of parallels between telling a spouse and a loved one; the remarks contained in the thread entitled "how to tell your partner" or something to that effect by Marla GG apply. It was a sticky up until a few days ago. You're best to use the search facility to find it as it is a long closed thread.

[Samantha Thomson]

well all i decided to tell my mom i called her and told her i had something to tell her i went over to her house and was about to tell her when she said i have some gifts for you didnt think anything of it as my birthday is in a few weeks but when i unwraped it it was a red leather skirt a garterbelt stocking make-up jewerly nylons she then told me she knew i was a crossdresser for several yrs and if i want to be a women that find w her samantha

[giuseppina]

This is one of the most favourable outcomes I can think of. Congrats, Samantha.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Samantha, How old is your mom and how strong is her heart go easy on her.

Orchid

[sometimes_miss]

There's really no way to know how someone else is going to respond; even if they are accepting of other people doing it, there's always the NIMBY syndrome: O.K. for everybody else, but not for my family. I had supposed that because my mom was o.k. with the gay neighbor, she would be at least accepting of my dressing as a girl. Nope. Didn't work out that way. Good luck should you decide to tell her; but I wouldn't, based on my own experiences. Most of the people I've told haven't had a good reaction to it. Seems the more we do it, and the more we are in contact with other people who do, after a while it seems 'normal' to us. Sadly, it doesn't work that way with the rest of the world.

[SarahLynn]

Samantha can i borrow your mom??? Mine would never have understood. She passed long before i found this site but even if i shared the site with her she'd not understand or be understanding.

SarahLynn

[Danni Renee]

Great for you, Samantha! I told my Mom this Summer and things have gone so well since then. I look forward to what she is getting me for my Birthday in November and Christmas. I am hoping for a pearl necklace....

Danni

[Phoebe P.]

I guess I'm different. I feel no need to tell anyone except my wife who has to know. We're together all the time. She knows everything about me and where most of the skeletons are! My dressing relates to my sexuality and I find no reason to discuss my sexuality with anyone especially my family. I would with my wife, but she doesn't like to talk about "personal things" like sex.