Question for you

[Jamie M]

Hi everyone

Just a quick question for you all.

I have read in various posts now about poeple's experiences on shopping trip all across the globe. My question ? Does it matter to you what a shop assistant's motive is for being nice to you ?

I.E. because that's the way they've been trained to be, because that's the way of gettimg more sales or because that's how they really feel ?

Personally , i don't care what the reason is as long as they make me feel welcome . How about the rest of you ?

[KatieZ]

They can fear losing their job, or enjoy making their commision.
As long as they treat me with respect I could care less.

If it's clear that they are nice because they truely are, I will thank them and let them know I appriciate them and will shop there again.

Hugs.

[Holly]

Although I would be delighted if they were kind and considerate because that is the way they genuinely felt, as long as they made me feel welcome and comfortable in their shop, I would be more than happy no matter what the motive.

[urban gypsy]

I think that as a whole in the uk the more mature assistants are just generally more helpful, especially as they only get a salary and no commission.

[Helen MC]

I can well remember the first time I went into a shop to buy female undies- I ws about 19. For years of course from the age of 12 I had enjoyed a large, free in-house supply of knickers and panties belonging to my big sister and my Mum when I lived a home. I took some of these with me, especially my sister's old schoolgirl knickers which she had stopped wearing by then and they weren't missed.

Soon however I had to buy panties for myself and I was very nervous the first time , doing as many have no doubt done, writing out a note, "from my Mum" to buy these knickers "for my sister". Soon however I got over my nerves and the changeover to self service shops with a central pay desk and also used Mail Order (the Internet was still 20 years in the future) saved me any embarassment.

The only time I have ever felt uncomfortable buying panties was when one store decided at Xmas to have MEN serving in the Lingerie Section one evening for other men to buy Undies as presents for their wives or girlfriends. They thought this would make it easier for blokes to buy such items. WRONG! It was a disaster. The male staff treated it all as a joke, some were embarrassed to serve the panties, bras etc, others knew very little about style, size etc and a few even tried to cover their ignorance by making crude, macho male jokes about the garments they were selling. When I went to get some nice Sloggis , a multipack of Maxibriefs in various colours, the bloke serving said "We're doing a special of 'Sexy' thongs and matching peephole bras. Far better than those for your 'bird'" . I said that she wanted the Sloggis and gave him the money and walked out with my purchase never to return. No female shop assistant would ever have acted in this manner and it was no surprise that the shop stopped this experiment after a couple of evenings and later said it had been a disaster and the male customers had complained and preferred to be served such items by FEMALE assistants NOT other Men.

Apart from the woman who managed the Charity Shop who knew that I was a CD and happily sold me both undies and skirts, blouses, womens two pieces etc, I have often felt that the female shop assistant has known that the items I am buying have been for me not a fictitious Wife or G/F.

Like you say, I really don't care if they do guess as long as I am served politely with no backchat or uncalled for remarks.

Nowadays I usually buy over the Internet so such problems simply do not arise for me any more.

[Jonien]

Hi everyone

Just a quick question for you all.

I have read in various posts now about poeple's experiences on shopping trip all across the globe. My question ? Does it matter to you what a shop assistant's motive is for being nice to you ?

I.E. because that's the way they've been trained to be, because that's the way of getting more sales or because that's how they really feel ?

Personally , i don't care what the reason is as long as they make me feel welcome . How about the rest of you ?

I feel that it would be nice to think that if staff are being trained, then that is letting more and more know that we girls are just another person and i feel that this sort of publicity can only be to our greater advantage and the more the general public is likely to except.
public awareness is the key to public acceptance

[RachelDenise]

I would like to think that they are being nice because they are nice, but I can accept it if they're doing it for the $$$$$. On the other hand, if you're acting nervous and sort of quirky, then it may be that the shop assistant is just reacting to your behavior. Confidence goes a long way.

[Wendy me]

well i shop, i mean i shop like all the time and i have had just abought every type of sales person that one could run in to... some less than nice to the girl that you just are feeling girlfreind let's shop .... one one shopping trip this got to have black v neck long sleved top was like i have to have and i could not find my size... so this sales girl (lets call miss bitch) she comes over and with a nasty look blearts out can i helpe you?? i say yes dear could you helpe me find this in a med...??? she says this is a womans store ... i say thankyou i know that could i get this in a med...??? she says perhaps you wife or girlfreind should come and look her selfe.....quitely i said excuse me .... i don't know if your always a bitch or if your just being a bitch for me the the top is not for my wife or for a girlfreind it is for me now could you find this in a med... ??? or could you find me someone that could helpe me find it thankyou???with some huffing and puffing she found the top i paid for it thanked her for her "helpe" and left....if i am out shopping i could not care less if the sales girl is less than pleased that i am shopping ....but if i find the sales girl that is warm and helpeful then it's shurly a lot more fun....

[Helen MC]

Very true Rachel, we ought to be careful how we act when buying female clothing.

About 30 years ago I read a marvelous article in a now defunct British TV/CD Mag called "Accord" by a shop assistant who had worked in a Lingerie Department of a large store for many years. She related how many men came in to buy female Undies and she could pick put those who only wanted them as presents for their Wives or Girlfriends from those who wanted them to wear themselves.. Her advice was not to do anything to spook the woman serving. If buying panties for yourself not to spend a long time touching or "feeling " them as an ordinary woman would not usually do that but to select your purchase and take them to the counter and pay for them in a low key manner. If the shop was not self service (and in those days many still were not) then if asking for panties, bras, etc to do so in a non sensational manner and not to get involved in florid discussions about them with the shop assistant as this would raw attention to you and would be likely to cause an adverse response.

I have always followed that good advice. I did however have a very enjoyable period when the middle aged Manageress of a Charity Shop where I used to purchase second hand female clothing correctly guessed that these were for myself. She used to keep aside panties and knickers for me as these were not re-sold by them unlike outer clothing and bras, and I would pop in for these. If the shop was closed she would let me stay behind and try on skirts etc and would advise me if they were a poor fit or suited me. I used to look forward to these sessions and this kind lady's assistance. Alas, all good things must come to an end and the shop was in a redevelopment area of that town and was demolished and she retired from that job.

[GypsyKaren]

I treat everybody with courtesy and respect, no matter how I'm dressed, and I expect the same in return.

GypsyKaren

[Katie Ashe]

I don't care what there reason is.

GPops always said: Treat others the way you'ld like to be treaded.

I am here to spend my hard earned money, I will not tolerate rudeness.